Predator | 42

Speaking the truth out loud felt strange on her tongue. It left an odd feeling and she couldn't quite decipher what it was. Guilt, maybe? Or was it regret? She wasn't so sure, but whatever it was, she wasn't liking it and tried to ignore the feeling.

But just as said, it was the truth after all. She couldn't lie about this and she didn't want to. April didn't need to think for long to realize that she in fact wasn't in love with Nikolaj. She had feelings for him, that much she had to admit, but none of them were love.

April wasn't sure if she could even love him. It was the wrong time for these kind of feelings. With everything that was happening around Rosewood there was just no room left for that. Everything was too complicated for a simple romance.

The words seemed to surprise Lorena a little bit, seeing as she remained silent for long seconds. She was just staring at her with a blank face, letting no hint of emotions crossing her face.

Shifting uncomfortably in her seat, April waited for her to say something- anything. In this moment, she wished to know what Lorena was thinking. She was feeling like she had just revealed her nastiest and darkest secret to her.

It was an uncomfortable silence that didn't seem to pass. April wondered if Lorena was struggling to find the right words to say. If so, she was not showing it.

"Okay," Lorena finally muttered after long and painful moments. "This shouldn't surprise me that much. I was kind of expecting that answer after all."

"Really?" April asked stunned. Was it that obvious? "What makes you say that?"

"Well," she started and played with the ends of her own hair, absently twirling it around her finger. "You didn't really act in love, I guess. At least not like Nikolaj is."

April scoffed in disbelieve. "Nik isn't in love with me," she said with a firm voice. If he was, she surely would have noticed by now. He didn't know each other good or even long enough to love her. For her, it was something that took time and didn't happen with a snap of a finger.

Besides, Nikolaj wasn't exactly the type of man who likes to show freely what he was feeling or thinking.

"Are you sure about that?" Lorena asked. Judging by the tone of her voice, she seemed to have a different opinion than April.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I be?" April questioned. "It's just mutual attraction."

"Ouch," Lorena replied and grimaced. "Don't let him hear that. Nik won't be happy to know that's it's just the attraction and the good sex that keeps you with him."

April bit the inside of her cheek. He wouldn't be disappointed. Would he?

"It's not that I don't like him, because I do. He's a good man and I like being around him. But what we have, whatever it is, is not a relationship and it's surely not love. Nik knows that."

"If you say so. But just be careful about that. I don't think he will take it well once he realizes that you aren't as serious with him as he is with you."

April groaned in frustration. "I am serious with him!" She argued. "The way you are speaking it sounds like I'm just using him."

"I didn't mean it like that." She cracked her knuckles and let out a tired sigh. Her eyes flitted back to April as she regarded her a sad and small smile. "Just be careful with him. I don't think he will take a heartbreak well."

"I won't break his heart," she promised.

In this moment, April decided that she would visit Nikolaj soon. She wasn't so sure if Nikolaj would drop by anytime soon. She wanted to give him some time to cool off, at the same time she didn't want to wait too long and give him the impression that she doesn't care about him or doesn't want to solve their situation.

April and Lorena talked for quite a while about simple things, before she decided to leave. April picked up their mugs and put them into the sink, too tired to clean them. Thinking about Nikolaj left her oddly exhausted. She went straight to her bedroom and decided to go to bed early this time.

She needed the sleep to clear her thoughts. Tugged in her sheets, she found herself lying awake for half an hour. Despite being sleepy and tired, she constantly shifted in her bed, trying to find sleep.

April was thinking of the next day and what she was going to say to Nikolaj. She was afraid that he wouldn't even bother opening the door for her. The thought that she might be unwelcome made her stomach churn in the worst way.

Until now, she didn't think about it. About the possibility, that he might not want to see her, or have anything to do with her anymore.

April shook her head. Surely, he wouldn't do that.

Trying not to think too negatively about the next day, she pushed all the thoughts to the back of her mind and tried to find some sleep.

--

The next morning, April was nervous as hell. Two days had passed since the last time she had seen Nikolaj. It wasn't too long ago, but she still couldn't stop being a nervous wreck. Not knowing what to expect, she had a sinking feeling in her stomach the whole drive to his place.

She hoped he was at home.

Standing in front of his door, she was about to knock but hesitated for a moment. Was it really a good idea to come here? After all, it was only two days ago when he stormed out of her car. Maybe she didn't let him have enough time to be alone.

For a second or two, she thought about leaving, but before she could decide the door opened already. Nikolaj looked at her and said nothing at first.

It was silent for long moments.

"Come in," he spoke and stepped aside, allowing her to enter his home.

A breath of relief fell from her lips. April followed his steps and walked with him into his living room. It was cold inside and she was glad that she had warm clothes on, though her clothes weren't enough to stop a shiver running down her spine.

Standing in the middle of the dim living room, April nervously fiddled with her fingers. She was thinking what to say to him, afraid to use the wrong words, but surprisingly, he was the first one to speak.

"Do you want something to drink?" He asked to break the ice.

It seemed that Nikolaj found the whole situation between them awkward as well.

"No... but thank you," she replied and coughed to get rid of her raspy voice.

It was an awkward moment between the two, one that April wished would pass away. They stared at each other. April's eyes were filled with deep nervousness, while Nikolaj's were just.. blank, just like expected.

"April," he whispered in a silent voice. Nikolaj stepped closer to her, decreasing the distance between them. He stopped until he was a feet or two away from her, his eyes softening as he looked at her. "What are you doing here?"

She peered up at him. "I.. I just wanted to see you."

His eyebrows furrowed. "I'm sorry," he apologized in a soft voice. "I'm sorry for the things I said to you. I was angry and said stupid things to you. Things I shouldn't have said to you, not to you. I know I hurt you, but still.. you still decided to come here, even after being an asshóle to you. And I'm even a bigger asshóle for not apologizing sooner and being scared to see you."

A wide smile graced April's lips. "I have to admit, you really were an asshóle," she replied and he cringed as if the words were a harsh slap. "But I do forgive you. After all that shit that Charles said to you I can understand that you were angry. But please.. do not think again that I'm against you, because I'm not."

"I know. I was just an idiot to realize that," he answered truthfully with a guilty and regretful expression crossing his face. "It won't happen again.. I promise that to you," he spoke and took her hand into his, caressing her hand with his thumb.

April smiled. It was the right decision to come to his place. She was afraid that things might turn to the worst, but it was a great relief that it didn't.

Soft fingertips ran up her arms, pushing her forward to him. April leaned into him as Nikolaj dipped his head down to hers to capture her soft lips between his.

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Sorry for the long wait! Hope you liked the chapter. I will try to update the chapter as soon as possible. Thank you all for reading and commenting.