[Ham Seoyeon]

The more Duho rejects me, the more determinate I grow. Since I embarked on the challenge of asking him out, I haven't relented, trying different ideas to woo him. None of the ones I effectively chose have worked so far, but this doesn't mean I'm out of options.

There's the old fashioned "secret admirer" trick among the ones I haven't tried yet. It's simple, it doesn't require me to play a part or pretend to ignore Duho. Hopefully, he'll read my letters and have plenty of time to discover his feelings before finding out I'm the author behind them.

I explain this new strategy to my friends, who are eager to discover how I came up with it. "It's not intricate: I come up with a sort of code name, or alter ego if you wish to call it like that, and write secret letters to Duho."

"So, you want to pass off as a secret admirer? Cool!" Based on Yujin's reaction, it's obvious she loves this idea. The same goes for Chaeyoung and Sangcheol.

"Why haven't you thought of it before? It's the most brilliant idea you've had so far!" exclaims Chaeyoung, frustrated that I had to resort to pathetic attempts to earn Duho's attention without many results.

I justify myself. "Well, I decided to prioritize a more direct approach."

She retorts. "At least you recognize it didn't work."

"Come on, Chaeyoung, are you going to keep remarking my previous failures? How about we look forward instead?"

She sighs, admitting defeat. I think I've held my ground quite well. Meanwhile, both Yujin and Sangcheol laugh. The fact that something as lighthearted as asking Duho out has turned into the object of debate is entertaining to them. I can't blame them for that.

***

After my friends are gone, I start jolting down a letter for Duho, trying to keep it neutral and, most importantly, not to give myself away in its content. I have to make it personal and intimate, though. It can't be something coming straight out of ChatGPT.

I scrap every attempt because it doesn't convince me. After an hour, I realize I've discarded seven drafts. Too many for me to even think I have an idea of what to write. I bite my pen out of irritability. If I don't come up with a good letter, I'll have to put this plan on hold and go back to the idea drawer for something new.

I'm stuck in this creative rut until something dawns in my mind. As much as I try to craft my letter, it will pass off as fake. I just have to follow my heart and let it guide me as I leave its mark on paper. It isn't as complicated as I make it be.

'Dear Soon Duho,

This is my first time writing a letter to a person I admire, in particular to you. I've watched you from afar for a while and have wondered if, one day, I'll have the courage to approach you in a proper manner.

I think you're charming in your own way. I like how polite you are, always ready to help others in need. I like your smile—it's so captivating and magnetic. For some reason, I also like your eyes. There's a spark in them I can't describe with words.

I love how you care about people but, at the same time, won't mince words with them. Your honesty is what makes you stand out from the rest. In a world where everyone prefers biting their tongue out of fear of upsetting people, I appreciate your confidence in showing you have nothing to hide.

I know this might not be a lot, but I want a chance to discuss my feelings for you in person. Please, let me know if you find this letter and answer. It would mean a lot to me.

I look forward to your reply.

Best wishes,
Oh Kkotnim.'

I swear I've come up with this pen name completely by chance. At first, I considered signing the letter with my real name; however, since this will only prompt Duho to tear it without even opening it, this is for the better.

I'd like to show it to my friends for proofreading and some extra advice; however, since none of them is here, I just fold it, put it into a nice pink envelope and prepare myself to slide it somewhere.

After roaming through the halls for five minutes, I find the lockers. "Where is Duho's?" I mutter to myself. To make sure I slide the letter in the right locker, I check every single name tag. Then, I notice the surname Soon. Good. I've just found his locker.

I look back to see if anyone's passing by. No-one is here, so I quickly slip the missive in Duho's locker and leave the area; however, as I've made enough steps away from the area, I bump into him. He warns me. "Be careful."

I regain my balance and mutter an unconvincing apology. "Sorry... I didn't expect to rush into you... I have to go, sorry." I bow twice and head out. What a piss poor figure. I hope he hasn't seen what I did before. If that's the case, I'm toast—I'll have to find yet another way to conquer him.

***

For the first time in three months, I have enough time to properly catch up with my family: my parents, my older sister and younger brother. In particular, I ask the latter, "Seohyul, tell me, how do you feel about these upcoming weeks? Have you got an idea of what college you'd like to go?"

Okay, maybe I shouldn't have jumped straight to this topic just yet. He blushes, embarrassed and in distress over what answer he should give. He turns to our eldest sister for reassurance. "Yuyeon noona, what should I do?"

She, however, just laughs. "Hahaha. Seoyeon has a point, though. You'll be out of college soon. It's not a bad idea to discuss your future." I'm surprised that Yuyeon has backed me. Not that we're not in good terms; we are, indeed, but we're really different.

She's the most rational, level headed and concrete out of the three of us. I, on the other hand, am more impulsive, as well as a serial daydreamer. No wonder Mom and Dad often say Yuyeon and I are like night and day, especially if we argue.

What about Seohyul? He stands in the middle. He isn't as much of a dreamer as me, but isn't exactly the most lucid when it comes to making important decisions, such as his post high school plans. In fact, he admits. "Well, I haven't decided yet."

Mom shakes her head, as if she already knows that he's been stuck in a rut for a long time. "It's a delicate topic," she comments, deflecting from the problem instead of tackling it straight away. Yuyeon doesn't seem pleased by this; I, on the other hand, see myself through this situation.

In fact, I blurt out what I've kept secret to my family until now. "Well, I can relate to Seohyul. When it comes to making the final move, I also struggle. But, for the first time, I've made my true first step towards my new goal."

"What is it?" asks Dad, driven by curiosity.

"I've confessed my feelings to a guy I like. But only through a letter." My siblings and father facepalm out of frustration. Mom, on the other hand, sighs out of relief.

"It's good that you found the courage to declare your love to this person. I'm so proud of you, Seoyeon." Hopefully, Duho will understand the message I conveyed in that missive and love me back.