The one who scratches and claws

And kicks and hits.

Yowels and screams.

Just to tear through a person...

To tell them they're ugly.

To insist I am worthless.

To chatter about how mean I am.

I am the bully.

Of myself.

Constantly belittling a heart that doesn't deserve the hate.

Always abusing the weak.

Hushed and voiceless against myself.

I can't not speak to people and bring up my self loathing, not in a serious manner.

"I hate myself aha."

Never,

"I am the abuser to myself, I am mean to my heart, and doubtful to my brain, I'm ripping my body to shreds, i hate myself, in a way nobody else understands."

I do not fulfill myself, I am not enough.

I'm not the way I wish to be, I wish I were deeper in love.

Not with my significant other, but with my body, my heart, and my soul.

I wish my own requirements, I could uphold.

I am my biggest bully.

My most out-spoken critique.

I am my main abuser.

I should be punished for all the metal trauma, in which I've induced, upon myself.

I am the abusive

I am the violent.

I am the punching bag of my stress.

I am the fighter of my reactions.

I've become a product of my environment

And I should be ashamed.

Ariah Christman