Not average as an infant.
Under average as a child.
Over average as a teenager.

An over achiever who over reacts.
I never let things go.
Everything ends with a kick or a slap.
I can't be wrong.
Fights last quite long.
I hurt someone.
Then they feel bad.
Something that made me mad.
Am I glad?
Of course not.
I'm merely a terrified lad.
Now I'm faulty.
I know know I'm the only one at fault.
Imprecise.
Incorrect.
Off topic.
Pain obsessed.
How am I able to hate pain yet love at the same time?
Simple.
Become a mime.
You can act out your feelings.
Being trapped in a box daily.
Just casually pulling a rope, right?
But once you notice that rope is a noose that you can't cut loose you realise you are a hostage to your own self abuse.
I am confused, that may be so.
But here are the few things I may or may not know.
People can change.
No, not really.
Haha, it would be silly if that were true.
'Cause in the end I'm still me & you are still only you.
I'm stuck to certain people, worse than as if we were tied together or glued.
One time I ended up in a bedroom.
Within it was my guy friend, nude.
He was being quite lewd.
He acted in a move.
I hate to be crude, but I hate what happened.
Now I only hold one mood.
Empty.
It's dark.
Honestly.
Life isn't what you'd expect it to be.
You act kind & you get forced into unwanted situations.
I lost something.
Many things.
Dignity.
Trust.
Ability.
Willingness to do anything.
My heart was shattered & mind broken.
I don't even fight anymore.
It's as if I'm carefree...
Except there's a catch, I feel like everyone is coming for me.
Anxiety.
The only friend I need.
Maybe one day I'll be set free...

- Ariah Christman