Although the room is full of laughter and smiles
I am alone.
Sitting squarely down, eyes flickering between
Waiting, watching to see.
See who will see through the invisible camouflage I have made for myself
Can they see me, I wonder
Do they ignore me by choice, or am I just unseeable?
Clearer than water, more see through then the glass house I live in
So I stand
And no one objects.
Running along the burned wood of my bridges, slipping past frozen glares
Legs burning, heart pounding, lungs screaming
Pause.
I hold my hand outside, wanting to see who would notice
The girl in the dark, hand held up to the sky
As the sky opens up, I eagerly wait.
Wanting nothing more to feel the coolness of water
Watch as it ran down my arm and to the ground
Drip after drip, drop before drop.
I wait, but it never comes.
I lean farther out, trying to catch a droplet
To get something to notice my presence
But it misses. Again and again.
They fall around but never hit the target
Even to Mother herself, I am unseeable
My hand falls and the only water it feels is bitter
Full of salt and hatred
Broken dreams and empty promises
Left behind friends and distant new ones.
The sky darkens even more, and as does the water
Staining the skin with the darkness within
Burning reminders of horrible days
Freeing them from the cage I kept locked tight
Time to let go, I say
Time to go
Upon reaching out my other hand I raised them to the sky one last time
Goodbye, I say
Goodbye, I'll miss you
The sky gives no response
Mother does not even flinch
Just allows her rain to touch my hands
Cooling them from the heat that burned so bright
You're free, she says
I try to say that it still burns, but she does not listen
Drenched in her rain, I find frozen armor
You'll be protected, she says
Go protect.
When I enter
No one objects
I sit down again, ready to be unseen
I am ready for this, I say aloud, I am ready.
Without a beat, he turns and says
I like your voice.
I am surprised, unmoving and unsure. I was seen?
To this, he laughed, cheery and bright.
Why hello there, he says
Why hello there friend
I don't know what to make of him
But I smile ever so brightly
Hello there friend, I reply
Do you like rain too?