Special Thanks to jonginerigom2
Yeols_truly, cosmic_baek sassyna98
pcybbh_exolAnd Skyler_Welch who keeps on commenting and reading my book. For those who are my silent readers hi and thank you too. ❤️❤️

I came back to my senses. I can't believe I remembered everything, every single bit of it that I hated the most.

I looked at my phone to see the text he text me earlier. Now I have doubts to reply. What should I do. Should I just leave it or reply to him.

Those words of the doctor saying not to force his memories back. Now what to do.

I think the word to describe my feelings right now is fear. I am scared to lose you Chen.

The fear sits on me like a pillow over my mouth and nose. Enough air gets by it, allowing my body to keep functioning, but it's crippling all the same.

I have imagined holding you so many times, but now more often that not I find the future I seek is an empty shell. Things have changed so much, so fast, I worry that I won't be able to control the ending of our story.

Why should you forget me? I can not tell you what happened that day. It might damage you Chen.

I'm in love with him.

He never leaves my mind, he's always there; mentally if not physically. It's just incomprehensible.

He's my one stable force, my one stability in a world filled with chaos and I so desperately need that in my life. I love him so much for that. I'm in love with him and I can't believe I've only just realised it.

This feeling is so strange; it stretches throughout my whole body. It's overwhelming, yet makes me feel complete. It has no bound nor length nor depth; it's just absolute.

It feels as though I'm in a dangerous fire, yet I'm completely safe at the same time. It feels as though someone's given me peace.

It feels as though my heart is dancing around my chest; and a hole, I was never aware was there, has been filled. I feel so light, like I'm on top of the world yet my heart is constricting and it feels as if there's no oxygen in my lungs.

It's strange - frightening even - how you can go from someone being a complete stranger, to then being completely infatuated by them and wondering how it ever was that you were able to live without them, because you sure as hell couldn't imagine being without them now.

I know we're only young, and most people would consider me to be foolish and naïve, but it's true when I say that I love him more than I could ever love myself. He's my best friend and, as cheesy as it sounds, he's my anchor. My one stability in this world filled with chaos.

But now when I remembered that moment from the past all this is like pause Ans I started to get confused for a second.

Then in a few minutes I thought of something.

Soo Mi: I need to talk to you tommorow after class

Soo Mi:and bring my phone with you

My hands were sweating and shaking when I type that. I was nervous about what I will about to do tommorow. I might regret later but who knows it did not happen yet.

I fire off my text messages to him. I put away the phone away, so I could not watch the screen obsessively and wait.

Five minutes goes by without the phone buzzing. My heart rate starts to increase as I imagine all the possible scenarios to explain why I am not getting my text back.

Finally, my phone buzzes and sweet relieved washes over me. I unlocked the phone, but my heart sinks.

I remember why I message him in the first place.

IdiotChen :Ok sure anything for you beautiful.

Those words he text me brings me a bit of joy, but the he doesn't know what I will say to him tommorow.

It might breaks his heart and mine too.

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Next morning

My head feel dizzy with pain as of my arms feel sore and numb. I opened my eyes with a sudden of realization that I slept on the wrong side of my bed. I felt my neck hurts too.

Great just great. Then I remembered everything from yesterday. Today the day I will do something to him that I will regret the most in my entire life.

I get up tried to stench my arms, but it still hurts. I went to the showers to get ready for school.

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I was on my way to school. I was still thinking about the meeting I will have with Chen later.

As I was walking without looking where I was going, I bumped into Soo Bin my best friend.

"Soo Mi... Hello... what you doing?" she asked me and walked with me to school together.

"Well I was walking to scholl what else and Soo Bin nice to see you too" I said while holding her hands.

I know sometime I am harsh towards her. But deep down she is the only friend I have that understands me.

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After class ends

Here goes nothing. I text him with...

Soo Mi: let's meet at the rooftop.

IdiotChen :ok I will be a bit late you go first.. beautiful 😊

As I look at his reply. I stared for a while and I can feel pain already. He doesn't know what I will do to him when we met later.

I reached the rooftop and see that he was not there yet I sat on the wooden
bench and thinking about what to say to him. I was thinking and thinking about it.

As I was thinking, I felt two arms hugging at the back of me. I already know who the person was by his warmth of his arms.

"Hello... Beautiful what do you want to talk about?" he asked as he sits next to me.

"OK... How I put this... I just... I just woke up one day and I knew" I said nervously without looking at his beautiful eyes.

"Knew what?" he said culess.

"I don't think we should see each other anymore... And we never been a thing to begin with" I said hesitately.

Deep down my heart was aching and broken to a million pieces as I said that to him.

"Are you saying what I think you are saying?" he replied and grabbed my hand.

"Yes I am breaking up with you" I said it to him and tears started to fall.

"Are you sure... you want this...Soo Mi.. But your tears said otherwise" he replied back.

"Yes I'm sure... I don't love you anymore" I raised my voice and pulled away my hands and get up to run away from him but I was stopped by him.

It was his hands ore anything else that stopped me but his words that make me froze from my place.

Those words were "But Soo Mi I remember everything even in middle school" he said.

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Sorry for the lack of updates. I hope you guys enjoy my story so far. What will happen next? Thanks for reading ❤️ don't forget to vote and comment.