***ALEX***

"Well," Josh's dad laughs as he finally pulls his hand back, realizing nobody's about to shake it. "Way to leave me hanging."

I roll my eyes at him. I don't care if he really is quote-unquote "God," he sets my teeth on edge. "Believe me, we've heard enough about you."

"I can see that. I'm sorry you've got such a terrible first impression." He slides past me, managing not to lose his balance one bit while the train lurches and clatters on the city's elevated tracks. In this lighting, a combo of fluorescents and daylight filtered through heavy rain and clouds, he looks like a darker-skinned version of Colin Farrell, especially Colin Farrell as Graves in Fantastic Beasts. Or perhaps George Clooney, whom Mom thinks of as God's gift, if not God Himself. Or - and I'm just spitballing here because Josh looks like Tyler Posey and it crossed my mind the second he started talking about his dad - Matthew Del Negro.

I wonder, is Matthew Del Negro really Mr. Graziadei? That might explain why he's in almost every TV show. It's like an unspoken Hollywood law or something.

But back to the subject of Mr. G being out to kill me. "Whatever you're gonna try to say to convince me, save it," I tell him.

"Save it for whom?"

"Someone who cares, and isn't on board this train."

AK stands next to me, his arms crossed. "Sorry, big man, but Josh has told us enough about you. We're not about to change our minds on your say-so." He claps me on the shoulder. "Especially not this guy, I'm thinking."

I'm not sure if he's alluding to my autism or what, but if so, I'm glad for it.

Graziadei purses his lips. "Mmm. I should've expected nothing less." He lets out a loud, fake yawn - fake, I'm thinking, only because I highly doubt he ever gets tired, except maybe one day a week, and (in my family's religious tradition, at least), this isn't that day. "But put it this way - if you think I'm bad, Kristoff Scoville is worse."

Ahmad scoffs. "Hard to say who's worse - the corporate tool or the guy who wields him."

"Who are you again?" Ahmad and Firdaus both raise their eyebrows at Mr. G. "No, seriously, I wanna know. Josh tends not to introduce me to his friends. He must think I'm more judgmental than I really am."

"What do you think I think?" Josh glowers up at his father. "Don't answer that. Rhetorical."

"You think I'm the devil. You forget that the devil is your oldest brother."

I lean over to Josh and whisper into his ear. "That wouldn't be Michael, would it?"

"Michael's the second-oldest, but he's always had a soft spot for me," Josh whispers back.

"I remember he was kind of a dick."

"No offense to him, but he kind of is. Archangels usually are."

AK looks up in surprise. "Archangels? You guys are archangels?"

"No, just my oldest sons and daughters. All but Josh here." Mr. G sounds a little inordinately proud. Of what, I couldn't say. "But listen...while we're on the move here, so is Scoville. He's already blown up a few cars-"

"Mine," Firdaus chimes in.

"It was a rental, wasn't it? Not yours?"

"Still, I couldn't care for it like it was my own?" She glares at Mr. G, her eyes sparkling dangerously. Like she's Supergirl about to give him a good dose of heat vision. Do humans have heat vision? I used to think humans were entirely powerless, but I've heard tell recently of humans who prove otherwise. Like Gabe's boyfriend, for instance - his unique dual scriv powers, he had them as a human too, I believe. Then again, I don't know everything about Harris, especially since I've only met him once. Not counting that dream where we were all merpeople. I'd rather not repeat that, unless we pick up where we left off with the fight against Lava Man Penner.

Right now, though, I think it's more likely that I, even with my increasingly icy nature, will be the one blowing my top. So I force myself to ask a question that'll lessen that chance. "Can we get to the point now? What's Scoville's game?"

"It's hard to explain," says Graziadei, "but I can tell you this much - you're probably more vulnerable than you think to his particular brand of technological magic." We pull into the first San Francisco station - not very deserted, but nobody comes into this car. I get the feeling that our less-wanted passenger has made us invisible, or possibly projected some illusion to make it look like our car is full. "I'm sure by now you're aware that Scoville is fronting for the Second 'Verse's insidious Peppermint Corporation?"

"Well, when he's calling them such a thing..." Firdaus whispers to Ahmad.

He nods solemnly. "Yeah, I've heard absolutely nothing good about those Peppermint peeps."

"You're just listening to the right people," Josh says, pointing to himself.

Graziadei sniffs loudly. "Since when do you draw that kind of attention to yourself, son?"

Like me with Elijah, Josh bristles at that paternal nickname.

"Yeah," AK says so Josh doesn't have to come up with a snarky and/or salty response. (By "salty," I mean "loaded with language to scandalize Captain Jack Sparrow.") "We know who Scoville really is, and what he really does."

"Thought so." Graziadei's eyebrows draw together, and I know I'm not the only one feeling under attack. "Alex, tell me, when was the last time you upgraded your phone?"

"Shit, I dunno, a year ago?" I pretend to count on my fingers. "No, more like ten months."

Mr. G snaps his fingers. "Of course. Your mom timed it so you and your brother - rest his soul - would be eligible for upgrades every two birthdays." He looks at the nearest window, his eyes drawn to a sign reading "Free Wi-Fi." "See, in the Second 'Verse, Peppermint manufactures their own unique devices, but around here, they don't have much hope of getting a foothold that way. Not with Prime 'Verse denizens - you uppity millennials excluded, though - tending to have some very strong brand loyalty." He finally takes a seat, but he's still the tallest among us by a country mile, or so it appears. "'Loyalty.' That spray-tanned scum in the White House thought he'd ruin that quality by demanding it of all his subordinates."

AK cocks his head. "Please, man, don't tell me you're a Hufflepuff."

"What's that?"

Josh smacks his forehead and draws his hand down his face in exasperation. "Dad, your pop-cultural ignorance shtick went out with Bones."

In an eerily Tempe Brennan voice, Mr. G says, "I don't know what that means."

I thought this guy was a vengeful Old Testament God, AK says.

I shake my head. Nah, he's playing us like fucking fiddles. All the dad jokes and sharp wit? He's a trickster like Gabriel.

"Funny you should mention him," says Graziadei. "He really was the trickster Eric Kripke and company made him out to be. The one thing they got right. And that reminds me, next time I have a kid, better name him Castiel." He laughs lightly. "But that's not germane to this discussion. The point is...you upgraded less than a year ago, right, Alex? Tsk..." He shakes his head. "By that time, Scoville was already spreading his influence, starting at those Chinese factories where these techie-toys of yours are manufactured." He holds out his hand. "Can I have your phone for a second, Alex?"

I reach for my pocket, but don't take my phone out. "Don't try to break into it or anything."

"I may have plenty of powers, but hacking is not my forte."

Reluctantly, I hand him my phone. He turns it over in his hands for a second before asking, "Do you by any chance have the Wallet app installed?"

Huh. I didn't expect him to change the subject there - though I'm not surprised that a subject change of any kind happened. "I...guess? It's one of those apps you can't uninstall and I never use it 'cause I'm strictly a cash guy-"

"Good," Ahmad says. "Like they say at my favorite deli back home - no plastic, no problem."

"I thought you could uninstall by now." Firdaus takes out her own phone, which looks like the generation between my current model and my previous one. "They put that in the OS at least three or four years ago."

"Oh, you can uninstall standard apps, no problem." Mr. G hands me back my phone. "The problem is, if you do, and you've got a new enough model that Scoville managed to sneak one or two of his chips into it...you've probably inadvertently activated hidden spyware."

Wait a minute. Have I uninstalled apps before? Not Wallet, I don't think - I could probably use that later, like when I'm in college or something. But Stocks? What use do I have for that kind of Wall Street...

Oh shit.

"I think I have that spyware on my phone."

"How much would they be able to capture?" AK looks at his own phone, feeling paranoid.

"I think it depends on how many of Scoville's people are actively looking at your phone, specifically..." Mr. G looks at me with sympathy, or a close simulacrum of same. "And knowing your history, Alex, you're a high-value target, so you probably merit 24/7 surveillance. Though I can't imagine you've done anything they could use against you..." His voice trails off for a moment as he watches the blood drain from my face.

"Do we wanna know what he's gonna tell us?" Firdaus asks Ahmad with worry.

"Can't be that bad," Ahmad laughs. "He's an angel."

"Whatever it is," says Mr. G, "just come out with it."

"What, you don't already know?" I ask in a high-pitched voice. "Or do you just wanna humiliate me with a confession?"

"I don't wanna humiliate you, and as for confession, I'm non-denominational."

I swallow, really not wanting to say it. But AK can hear it in my thoughts, at least, so I might as well... "I...I sexted my girlfriend."

Josh titters, then his face contorts in disgust. "No, not for you," he's quick to add. "For whoever surveilled you and probably jacked off to it."

"No judgment," Mr. G's quick to say. "Uh, but was it through your phone, or some app?"

"Snapchat."

"Oh good." He pretends to wipe sweat from his brow. "Third party apps are harder for Scoville's people to track you through. Harder...but not impossible." He looks outside the window again, as if Scoville is watching us from beneath the tracks. "Not now, but later, I'll have to coach you - all of you - on how best to shield your phones. I doubt Scoville's the only one watching. FBI, anyone?" He scoffs. "Or possibly Mossad. Didn't you cross paths with one of theirs, Alex?"

Oh yeah. Ariel Mazouz. "I thought he was ex-Mossad, though."

"I don't think you can be ex-Mossad any more than you can be, say, ex-Catholic," Ahmad says. "From what I've heard, it's one of those life-membership kind of deals."

"Religion vs. secret agency?" Firdaus laughs.

"And look at us, combining a little of both in our lives these days," he returns. "And not even our own religions either."

The train travels underground again. "I can tell you right now that Scoville's looking hard for you, Alex," Graziadei says. "At this moment, he'd have a tough time of it, since mobile service is...impacted. But like I said - hard, but not impossible. Until we get to our safe house - technically a hotel room, but you get the idea - anyway, you kids will all need to watch your back."

I do exactly that, turning around and peering through the back door of this car. Wait, since when was this the last car on the train? I could have sworn there were at least two more to either side of this one.

But that's not what worries me the most.

That dubious honor goes, instead, to the twin red lights speeding this way.

"What the hell is that?" AK asks as he notices it too.

Josh and his dad both run up to the door, each brandishing a pair of collapsible spex that unfold into something initially resembling early Google Glass, but then takes on a green glow around the lenses like night-vision goggles. The way they're so synchronized, it's hard to remember their animosity, and easier to see their genetic relationship. It's like this one scene on Lost Girl - Dyson and his son eating their food the same way. (Chicken wings, I think? Some kind of pub food, anyway.)

"What's happening?" asks Ahmad.

"Wasn't that train car attached to this one before?" Josh asks.

"Don't ask me," says Mr. G. "You've been on board longer than I have...but yeah, I think you're right." He pulls off his glasses and closes them up again for pocket storage. "Scoville must've hacked that car and automated it like his fancy new truck."

All us Primers pale at the sound of this. "And based on what happened with his truck..." Firdaus begins, looking extra-scared.

"He's gonna make it collide with us." I pace the floor, only this time I'm not thinking about how to pummel Graziadei into the stain-covered carpet. "How do we stop it? How?"

"Ahmad, get into the Wi-Fi," Josh commands. "Hurry! I can feel us slowing down!"

"You sure about that?" AK plants his feet on the ground and holds on tightly to the nearest support pole. "Oh God, you're right!"

"What can I do?" I ask frantically.

Ahmad burrows into his bag and pulls out the blue internet wire. "Take this."

"And do what?" I hold out my arms so he can drop the rolled-up mass of insulated material into them. "I thought you were gonna get on the Wi-Fi."

"I am!" he yells as he fires up his laptop. "Just follow Firdaus' lead!"

She takes the wire from me. "Come with me," she says. "You, Alex, and you..." She snaps her fingers at my cousin. "KJ?"

"AK," he corrects her. "But I get that a lot, unfortunately. Haha, this one" - he points to me - "looks more like a certain famous AK I know-"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it." Firdaus waves him into silence, then leads the way to the back door. She hits the button to open it, allowing us an ominous full view of those twin red lights - which actually aren't red lights at all, but sparks flying from beneath the train car.

"At that speed," I say, "it might derail before it crashes into us."

"Yeah, don't hate me for this, but..." Mr. G steps between me and Firdaus and stretches out his hand. I can't resist the thought of how much he resembles Moses parting the Red Sea, but he's not doing such a thing for us. Instead, it looks like he's giving us a telekinetic speed boost. Now we're faster than the train car behind us, but only slightly.

AK looks up at him, his eyes narrowed. "Didn't you just hear Alex say it's gonna derail?"

"Might," Graziadei says. "Not will." He runs back to help Ahmad and Josh with whatever it is they're doing on the laptop - something that, apparently, needs three men behind the keyboard. (Well, technically, one nervy man, one sweary demigod, and one tricksy deity whom I'm still never planning on calling "God" anytime soon.)

As AK snickers at the sound of my thoughts, I turn to Firdaus and ask, "What's the plan?"

"Now that we have a tiny bit of a speed-force advantage," she says as she ties up the rope, "I'll lasso the train car behind us so we can tow it. And for that, I'll need both of you to help anchor the connection."

"Two strong men, huh?" AK asks. "Or, uh, man-boys, at least."

"I'm stronger than I look, but I also get sick more often than you'd expect." Firdaus finishes tying the lasso.

I watch her twirl it over her head. "Calling on your inner Wonder Woman, huh?"

"Fun fact: Josh tells me his mom looks a hell of a lot like Gal Gadot." She looks up at the blue lasso, then realizes it's not quite tied properly, and it's coming apart.

She said the "t" in her name? AK thinks.

I know, Frenchifying it isn't correct, but it sounds right to me too. Makes her sound sexier, I think. I shake my head. Sorry, I'm hetero.

Nah, it's all good. She's my lady crush anyway, Gal is.

"Got it," Firdaus says as she finally gets the lasso tied tightly. The other train has sped up more in the meantime, and those deep red sparks now flare up orange, even turning yellow-white for a moment as both our trains blaze through the next station without stopping. More than one person on the platform throws up their arms in frustration. "Oh, but..." She looks at us guys with an ingratiating smile, and not at the oncoming train. "Is now a bad time to mention I've never even seen Wonder Woman?"

"What?" AK and I cry simultaneously.

"I know, the bloody government in my country banned it at the last minute, and Josh has been meaning to sit me and Ahmad down to watch it all together, but..." Blindly, still not looking at her target, Firdaus throws the lasso, which connects with some of the spiky appendages that normally connect these train cars. Not every one of them, but the ones on the upper half of the car's end. For a second, she has to hold on to this improvised connector all by herself, but then AK and I join her, tugging on the wire with all our strength. Not surprising me, he's got plenty of it - looking ahead, I see his biceps bulging even under his layers. He must be sweating a hell of a lot too - I know I am. We can come out of this thing alive and emerge into the rainy surface world already soaked through.

"Okay, tie it off!" Firdaus points to one of the seats, and AK and I scramble over to it and hurriedly get that done. He holds on to the wire and I wrap it around the metal tube connecting the seat to the floor.

Once we're done, the other train keeps on coming at us, though now at the same speed as this one. For how long, though? That wire isn't going to hold very long, I don't think.

Ahmad runs up to us with his laptop in hand. "Hey, one of you angel boys has to take this." He disconnects a flash drive from the laptop and waves it around.

"And do what with it?" I ask.

"Take it to the other car," he says.

Josh ducks under the blue wire and looks out at the other car himself. "We need to get this flash drive into another laptop on that car's Wi-Fi. Sure, it's probably the same network as this one, but getting closer to whatever machine Scoville's attached to automate that one into a deathtrap oughta help-"

I judge the distance between our car and the other one. "You sure you can't make that jump yourself?"

"No wings," Ahmad points out.

"Same," Josh says, "and even if I could jump as well as any Power Ranger - not saying I could, just being hypothetical - the physics gets too wonky at these velocities." He scratches his neck. "I suck at physics at the best of times, you know."

"That's mostly my fault," says Graziadei. "I did encourage you to defy its laws regularly."

"The point is," says Josh, "I'm gonna need to piggyback on one of you angels while you fly me to and from this car."

I raise my hand. "I'll do it."

"Cool." Josh takes the flash drive from Ahmad. "As soon as I'm on the other side, I'll open a line to you and you can walk me through it."

"Why isn't Ahmad going across?" asks AK.

"Someone needs to run the laptop at this end," Firdaus says. "Might as well be him."

I kneel in front of the door and wait for Josh to climb onto my back. God, he's heavy, but I've pressed more at school, even if only for about fifteen seconds at a time. On the outside.

"Get ready to get a ton of feathers in your face," I say as I rise slowly to my feet.

"Whatever it takes, brother. Allons-y?"

I reach up with one hand, and he temporarily relaxes his grip on my neck and shoulders so he can bump fists with me. Then I spring forward, launching myself into the gap between cars with outstretched wings and a cry of "Geronimo!"