Seconds turned to minutes, and then minutes were creeping past. The crew waited in silence, too nervous to talk with the watchful Enforcers lurking all around them. Eventually, the Enforcer com flicked open a missive, and then announced that the crew was returning to the residences. Without Ravi. Hopefully, it was a good sign.

The very air was strained with nerves on the ride back. By the time they slipped free of the oppressive silence in the hovs, Lio was ready to collapse in the grass. After everything they had accomplished, his friends were still going to be scattered. Separated from each other. He had been so sure that if they managed to fly the lightship, anyone would see that they were the only crew who ever should.

Trudging across the emerald lawns, finally unsupervised, Teres bumped his elbow. "You alright, Lio?" On his other side, Aziri glanced at him.

"Yes. I think so. I was certain it would..." He shook his drooping head. It had been so long since he last slept, and it was all catching up to him.

"I still think your plan was a good try," Aziri said, stifling a yawn. "And even if the Commissioners don't listen, I'm glad you spoke up. You made us sound quite good." He lifted his thick brows. "Particularly Com Endessen."

"He deserves it," Lio mumbled, flushing.

Aziri poked his warming cheek. "How long has this been going on?"

Evasive action required. Feign confusion. "What are you—"

"Oh, don't try it, Lio," Teres said mildly. "We all know you're into him, and the way he looks at you hasn't gone unnoticed either."

"It does seem like you're fucking it up less than expected. Although you probably should've figured out a better way to introduce him to your family." Aziri cackled.

Lio avoided their gazes, but he heard Teres mutter something and reach across him to sock Aziri in the shoulder.

Everything was happening so quickly, there hadn't been time to consider the future. But those considerations were starting to creep in, no matter how much he wanted to resist them. As soon as his mother had reappeared, all of the realities of his life reappeared too. Opalina had shielded him and Ravi in goddess-blest privacy long enough to get caught up in each other. But now he'd lost the lightship, and with it, his chance at a future different from the way the rest of his family lived.

When he chanced a look up, Aziri and Teres were both watching him with obvious concern. But they had already caught up to the rest of the crew, and Lio was glad it forestalled any further attempt at a conversation. He could barely sort out his feelings for himself, let alone explain them to his friends.

"What do we do now?" Duhar asked. The crew clustered in the middle of the lawns, everyone slumped, half-dead on their feet.

Jossen rubbed his hands together. "I think we go get some sleep. Com Endessen will tell us what comes next when he gets back."

There were silent nods, and they dispersed. It was harder than it should have been to walk away. Perhaps because it was one of the last times they would be all together like this. Unless by some miracle, Ravi was able to convince the Commissioners to take all of them.

In the sparse accommodations provided, Lio curled up on the bed, and the rest of his thoughts sprang from the clouds of confusion in his mind. His family would have plenty of opinions about his reassignment. Likely somewhere nearer to home in the capitol. And so quickly, everything would shift back to high profile parties and political dinners and rehearsed speeches and a lifetime of false-smiling. Ravi wouldn't recognize the Lio who lived that life. He would want no part of it, and Lio couldn't blame him.

If he was going to try to finally face reality, he should prepare himself for the worst. He would drift, untethered from his friends and his hopes and the man he loved, and eventually they would forget about him. Life would shrink to a position in some elite Engagement unit or a job working for Alina. If he was lucky, his lightship would at least end up under Ravi's command, and he could watch from a distance. Teres and Aziri would call him from their own postings, until they all realized they had nothing in common anymore and the calls turned to occasional missives and then silence.

Lio burrowed into the pillows, muffling an anguished sound. All his hope was poured into a plan that had stopped working. He wanted to cry, but he didn't have the energy. Instead, he sank toward the grey mist of troubled sleep. The last clear thing he remembered was the hope that if he fell asleep, he would wake up back in a cozy, little rock-cave of a room in a forgotten outpost at the edge of the desert.

Sharp rapping surfaced him from a nightmare where he battled breaking ocean waves, trying to get back to shore. He flailed his arms, feet twitching with the effort of kicking, and almost flipped off the bed.

"Alior!" Jossen's gruff voice echoed through the door. "Com Endessen is back with news."

Groggy, he stumbled to find his shoes. By the time he got the door open, Jossen was already rounding up the rest of the crew, herding everyone into a circle in the middle of the lawn. Lio tried not to trip over his still-clumsy feet as he rushed to join them.

Ravi waited until they were all assembled. His stoic mask stayed in place, but he took a deep breath before he began to speak. "So. I was able to talk with the Commissioners for a while. The first thing I need you all to know is that nothing is definite."

"They gave you the com position?" Duhar gasped.

Lio could've sworn Ravi's gaze flickered toward him, but it was so quick he wasn't sure.

Ravi shook his head. "No. They're considering it. But they wanted to know what I'd do with it. And they wanted..." He stopped, made a move as if to shove his hands in his pockets, and then clasped them behind his back instead. He frowned at the grass, a muscle working in his jaw.

With undisguised effort, he continued. "They were very clear that if I get the Enforcer role, I can only fill the Enforcer team positions. I tried...we discussed alternatives. For a long time. They are willing to let me keep Jossen as subal. Duhar, you're pretty much guaranteed a position as a pilot. Other than that...they were only willing to consider people I could make a case for as Enforcers."

Lio's blood moved sluggishly in his veins. His heart was crumbling rock.

Ravi jerked his head up to scan the circle. "If they give me the command, then Jossen, Duhar, Teres and Orvaska will also be offered a continuation at Opalina. Everyone else will need to be reassigned."

Lio couldn't look at him anymore. But looking at his dumbfounded friends was worse. He stared up at the sky. It was suffused with soft evening light. Yesterday at this same time, they had been preparing to go and take back their lightship. He'd been so certain, but that had been an illusion he was too naïve to recognize.

"There is no guarantee that this will happen," Ravi said. "They're still considering other people for the Enforcer com spot. We might all end up reassigned elsewhere."

Was it worse to have the whole crew scattered through the territories, or just half of them? His throat was suddenly raw.

"When do we find out?" Jossen asked, subdued.

"They make the com announcements tomorrow."

"But..." Duhar looked around in confusion, brow furrowed. "But we need everyone. This wasn't how it was supposed to go."

There was a short silence, until Ravi spoke. "We don't know much yet. I think everyone needs to get some rest. In the morning, we'll get a better idea of where we stand. And no matter what happens, I will do whatever I can to help each of you get a placement where you can do well. We'll figure it out. Tomorrow." He rocked back a step. It was like a spell breaking, and the crew edged away from each other, toward their separate rooms.

Teres seized Lio and towed him toward Aziri. Her face was already scrunching against tears. She pulled them both close. "I'm sorry," she managed, her voice thick. "This is bullshit. I'll—"

"You'll take the position," Aziri interrupted, swiping at his own eyes. "And do a damn good job of it. Don't even think of doing anything else."

Lio bobbed his head, trying to force a halfway convincing noise of agreement. He must not have been persuasive, because Teres was looking at him with pure misery.

"Lio," she tried, and then the tears spilled over.

"It's okay." The words sounded garbled, but he kept repeating them. Even though it wasn't okay and it was still lashing into him with every breath. He was never going back. This part of his life was over, and he didn't know what came next. Whatever it was, it couldn't compare.

Aziri sniffled into Teres' shoulder, and then they were splitting apart, the way Lio had always known they would. Nobody had any parting encouragement. By the time he turned away from them, all he wanted was to bury himself in a bed and shut out the rest of the world.

He stumbled back to the narrow residence and stepped out of his shoes. And hurled each of them at the wall. They bounced impotently to the floor, and he crumpled down beside them. He was numb and exhausted and perfectly alright with slumping into sleep on the carpet.

So stupid. Behaving like a child. Confusing dreams with reality. The Mastali lightship was out of his reach. Soon enough, the only real friends he'd ever made would be out of reach too. But as terrible as it all was, none of it matched the last truth he could barely face.

Ahead of him were so many days and so many nights without Ravi.