T W O

Then Theo walked into my house like he owned the place. He brushed past me in the doorway, his arm lightly touching mine for a second and sending a gentle flurry of shivers down my spine. He didn't even turn to look back at me before heading into another room, disappearing from my sight.

My feet moved of their own accord, following the direction he had taken without any command from my brain. Realising my mouth had been open the entire time, I quickly closed it, and shook my head as if that would clear my thoughts.

He was waiting for me in the lounge, hair dishevelled, clothes dirty, looking worse than I had ever seen him before. A giant duffel bag that looked practically empty was strapped over his body, and his hands gripped it as if it was his last prized possession in the world.

Theo heard the sounds of my footsteps and tilted his head to watch me as I walked into the room. My stomach jolted as I stared into the same eyes that had looked back at me all day – only instead of being on paper, they were in person. I was speechless, my mind whirling. Theo hesitated, opening his mouth to say something and then quickly snapping it shut again. It seemed he was struggling to find the right words as much as I was.

And then, the world started spinning. My breathing grew laboured as I struggled to get a grip on reality. My hand latched on to the first thing it could grab as I desperately tried to steady myself.

"Breathe, Rose," Theo whispered into my ear, and I realised that it was him I was holding on to; I was clutching him like I was drowning and he was the life jacket keeping me from sinking below the water. "Just breathe."

I closed my eyes to try and make the world stop spinning while he continued to speak soothingly into my ears, his voice as smooth as warm honey. "You're fine. It's just a panic attack, Rose. Focus on your breathing."

I found myself listening to him as I concentrated on bringing the air back into my lungs. He held on to me even when the room came back to normal, and my chest stopped rising and falling rapidly. It was only when I opened my eyes and looked into his worried gaze that he let out a small sigh of relief and released me from his grip.

Eventually Theo broke the silence that had settled between us as he shifted his feet around on the carpet beneath him. "Hey, Rose."

A lot can change in forty-eight hours, which was evident when I stared at Theo. His face had lost the tanned colour he normally had; it was now pale and sickly. There were bags under his eyes, much worse than mine – which looked like they could droop shut from fatigue any moment now – and his whole body was shivering, his bare arms covered in goosebumps. Theo was taller than me, but only by a few inches, so I was close enough to see every detail in his face – every crease of worry – and the golden flecks in his green eyes that were normally dazzling were now dull and lifeless.

I knew I couldn't do it; I knew I couldn't give him hell. The irrational side of me was winning, and I felt myself forgetting about all my questions and instead just wanting to help him, like he had just helped me. The questioning could wait until later.

"You look freezing," I said softly. My breathing was normal now, and my voice sounded less strained. His eyes flickered with surprise, but I cut him off before he could speak by adding, "Do you want a cup of tea? I was just about to make some."

His eyes scanned me to check whether I was serious or not. "Are you sure?" he asked, as though I hadn't thought this through before speaking.

"I'll take that as a yes," I said firmly, before heading off to the kitchen without a backward glance. Subdued, Theo followed me into the next room, his eyes burning a hole in my back.

My hands shook as I grabbed two cups from the cupboard, and after a moment of hesitation Theo flicked the kettle on. He took a seat at the breakfast bar while I organised the tea, and I noticed something inquisitive in his gaze.

Perhaps he thought I might try and call the police, or was biding my time until my parents came home from work so that I could turn him in. Or maybe he thought that offering him a cup of tea was my way of buttering him up, so he'd be more willing to spill the beans when I began my inevitable tirade of questions. It probably didn't cross his mind that I didn't care about any of that. That I, Rose, the girl who never put one toe out of line, had totally ignored every well-behaved instinct I had, and all I cared about in that exact moment was making sure that Theo was okay.

I found myself glancing over at him every so often, like I needed constant confirmation that he was actually sitting there. Every time I did our eyes met, and every time I was the first one to look away.

"There you go." I rested the mug in front of Theo, careful to not spill anything. My hands were still shaking, and I quickly hid them behind my back so that he wouldn't notice. "I'll be back in a second."

I didn't wait for his reply before rushing up the stairs. I threw myself into my bedroom and leaned back against the door as it clicked shut behind me. I closed my eyes and waited for the world to stop spinning again. What are you doing, Rose? I asked myself, but the answer was still the same: I don't know.

I grabbed the hoodie from my desk chair and shoved it on, then went to my wardrobe and looked through the other hoodies I had until my hands latched onto one that was a few sizes too big for me.

Theo was still there when I returned to the kitchen, casually sipping his cup of tea with a small smile on his face. He hastily put the drink down on the table when he noticed me.

"Here." I tossed him the oversized jumper. "Put this on."

He caught it effortlessly, examining it with a grin. "Normally it's the guy who lends the girl his jacket," he pointed out. "Not the other way round."

"Well, you obviously don't have one in there" – I gestured towards his bag – "so you'll have to wear mine instead for now."

His expression quickly morphed from amused to sheepish. "The only one I've got with me is soaked through. In fact, all the clothes I brought with me are soaked. It was raining earlier when you were at school."

"Give it here then. I can dry it for you."

I grabbed the hoodie from him and tossed it into the tum- ble dryer, casually shrugging off his mutter of thanks. Theo slipped my hoodie on, and it fit him surprisingly well, if not a bit more loosely than it should have. He looked different somehow, and I had the strange feeling that I'd never properly looked at him until now. He was a few inches taller than me and his hair fell into his eyes, just like it did in the photo on the posters. His brown waves had the usual bed-head messiness that suited him perfectly.

"Hey, we're matching," he pointed out in a low mumble. I looked down and, sure enough, I had picked out almost the exact same hoodie as his, just in a smaller size.

"Oh ... yeah. My brother gave me that one when he went off to university," I explained, thrown off by his attempt at humour. Theo's own wary smile disappeared, and he nodded at me, letting out an awkward cough. I took a seat opposite him at the breakfast table, taking a sip of my own tea and letting the warm liquid steady my nerves. Theo kept his eyes on me and took another gulp of tea.

At last he took a deep breath and leaned forward in his chair, his gaze never leaving mine. "You probably have a lot of questions for me."

"I do." I nodded once before placing my cup back on the table. "But I'm still in shock that you're actually here right now."

"I know," Theo agreed, fiddling with the cords on his hoodie. "I can see how it would be extremely confusing for you. But, before you ask me any questions – before you get your answers – I need you to promise me one thing."

I sat up straighter, my curiosity growing. "What?"

"I need you to promise me you won't call the police. Whether I stay here or not."

I sucked in another breath, my mind working overtime as I took in his words. I stared into his eyes and saw right through his outward calm: I saw his fear at the idea of being caught. And although I knew in that moment that I wouldn't call the police, I still leaned forward in my chair, and faced him straight on.

"I don't think you realise this," I said slowly, reaching to let my fingertips trace around the edges of my empty mug, "but by coming here, you've put your fate into my hands. By coming into my house, you've got me involved in something that I don't even know anything about yet. Whatever happens to you is dependent on me – and if I wanted to call the police I could and you know it."

I saw the panic flash in his expression.

"I knew what I was getting myself into," he said. "And trust me, Rose, I didn't want to get you involved. I still don't want you to be involved. That's why, if you want to call the police ... if you want to tell anyone about me being here, then I won't risk sticking around. I'll be out of here before your name can get dragged into this."

"But why are you here?"

"Because I need you, Rose." Theo reached over to touch my hand on the mug. "I need your help."

"With what?" I whispered back, almost inaudibly. But Theo heard me – the room was so silent that it was almost like we were in our chemistry class again, doing an experiment without speaking.

"I need a place to stay for a few nights." His eyes searched my face as he waited for his words to sink in. "And I need you to keep quiet about it."

I yanked my hand away from his and sat up in my seat in pure horror. "You can't be serious? This is insane," I muttered, turning my head away from him. "This really is insane."

But what I found more insane than Theo's request were my own actions. I didn't know anything about the situation – where Theo had been, what he had done, why it was even me that he had come to. Every inch of my body was urging me to turn him in, to do the sensible thing and send him back home. Yet there I was, ignoring all of that and instead listening to him speak.

"I know," Theo muttered. "But I wouldn't be asking if I wasn't desperate."

My breathing became shaky again, and I took a minute to compose myself before looking at him questioningly. "Where have you been these past forty-eight hours then?"

"There are some lovely allotments a few miles away with a great array of abandoned sheds to sleep in."

"You slept in a mouldy shed?"

An image of him lying down in the corner of a dark, damp hut in only a jacket and jeans forced its way into my head, and I shuddered, freezing just at the thought of it.

"And then I came back into town in the day." Theo paused for a moment, before adding, "I saw all of you out there helping, you know. You were handing out flyers."

"Because we were all worried about you," I replied. "Turns out that was obviously a waste of time."

He cringed. I felt bad immediately after saying it – it was clear to me that Theo hadn't considered that his sudden absence would put any strain on others' lives. Nevertheless, he sat up straighter a second later, his eyes filled with stubborn determination.

"Sorry ... I guess. But I'm not going back home, Rose," he said, his eyes boring into mine so that I could see the pure honesty they were filled with.

"Why can't you go back?" I asked. "What happened?"

And, just like that, I watched Theo withdraw from me. Any barriers I may have opened between us were suddenly shut as he released my hand and moved backwards, closing the conversation off before it had even really started. "I can't tell you that."

"Why not?"

"Because you don't want to be involved, right? It doesn't matter now anyway, I just need to figure out what to do next."

I stilled, a thousand different scenarios filling my head.

"Why me then?" I felt my cheeks flush with warmth the moment I said it, and I saw his eyes flicker to the ground.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean..." I struggled to get my words across. I wanted to know why he had come to me – why he was asking for myhelp – but I was hesitant to ask, not sure if I wanted to hear his answer. "Why did you pick me if you aren't even going to tell me why you're running away? Why do you think I'll help you?"

A sad, bitter smile tugged at Theo's lips. "Think about it, Rose. I don't exactly have many people I can turn to." Before I could respond, he added, "Besides, even if there were others, you would have been my first choice."

"But why?" I started to feel insecure underneath his pierc- ing gaze. "We barely spoke to one another at school. I didn't even think you liked me ..."

I thought back to all the times at school when Theo had ignored me and everyone around him. I'd always felt something a bit like pity for Theo, but maybe it had stemmed from my need to be liked. Within our first few chemistry lessons together I realised I was never going to get more than a few words out of him at a time. When I'd asked if he wanted to sit with me and my friends at lunch and he had politely refused, only to proceed to his normal solitary spot in the corner of the dining hall, I knew that this was probably how Theo wanted things. Theo liked being a loner; it suited him, and he'd rejected my friendly advances because he wanted to stay that way.

But he wasn't uncomfortable to be around. He paid interest to me during chemistry experiments, his eyes intently watching me when I spoke and his attention never breaking. He'd clearly sussed my control-freak tendencies, and would always retrieve the equipment we needed for each experiment and wait for me to tell him how he could assist. He would often copy my homework when he thought I wasn't looking, but I'd always thought it was kind of cute. I remembered that sometimes, just sometimes, it did actually seem like Theo wanted to get to know me, and even though our conversations were always short and snappy, I felt like we understood each other.

"I dunno, I guess you're ... different." Theo shrugged. "You just always seemed like a nice person. I figured if anyone was going to hear me out before sending me away, it would be you. You've always been nice to me at school, and I know I'm not always the easiest person to be around."

"Well, I think everyone should get a chance to explain themselves," I mumbled, averting my eyes in embarrassment.

In that moment, I prepared myself to say no. To tell him that I couldn't help him – I didn't even know where to begin and it wasn't my problem. And that I didn't feel comfortable breaking the rules, especially when I didn't even know what he had done in the first place. I could be harbouring a criminal for all I knew!

But instead, as I opened my mouth to tell him that I simply wasn't the right girl for the job, I spluttered, "So what ... what do we do then? Do I hide you up in my room away from my parents until you can go back home?"

There was a long silence. I watched Theo in his chair; dis- belief and shock crossed his features. He looked so bewildered that I thought it might be a while before he'd be able to speak again, but his words filled the room a second later.

"You're going to help me?"

I shrugged helplessly, still astonished at the decision I had made. "I can't just let you sleep outside in the cold for ever, can I? And I know you won't let me just call the police –"

"If you do that, I'm out of here," Theo cut me off. "Seri- ously, Rose, if you want to do that –"

"I don't. Didn't I just say that I want to help you?" I inter- rupted him sharply.

And I did. I knew this was ridiculous; I knew the consequences of my actions, the effort that it was going to take, and how hard it was going to be to keep the secret. For once, I didn't know how things would turn out. I didn't actually know anything – how long it would go on for, why it was happening. Yet I still found myself agreeing to it. There was something in Theo's eyes – that same something that had transfixed me earlier that day – that told me that I had to help him, that turning him away would be the wrong decision.

Perhaps I hadn't thought it through enough; perhaps I would regret it later. But I had never done anything risky before in my life, and maybe now was the time to live in the moment. Maybe it was time to start saying yes.

"This is only temporary, right?" I confirmed. "I don't want you to end up staying here for weeks on end, when my parents could literally catch you any second."

Theo shook his head firmly. "It'll only be a few days, I swear. I just need some time to get my head straight. And besides, Rose, I promised you before that your name wouldn't get dragged into this, and I'm going to keep my word."

I nodded once more, clicking my tongue on the roof of my mouth. He watched me just like he had before, but there was something else in his eyes this time. Hope. Hope that maybe I would be different, hope that maybe, just this once, I would break the rules, and all for him.

"Are you sure there's nothing I can do to persuade you to talk to your parents? If you just went back home and faced up to whatever you've done wrong –"

My voice trailed off.

"I can't do that, Rose. I just can't." He sounded so distressed that I reached forward and took hold of his hand.

As soon as we made contact, Theo stiffened up again, and I wondered if he would pull away from me. But instead, he just gripped tighter, his shoulders relaxing.

"It's all right," I said softly, giving his hand a squeeze. "We can talk about this later."

"Thanks," Theo said. His voice still sounded strained, but his eyes, catching mine, were filled with relief and gratitude.

And, in that moment, it all seemed fine. I had found the boy who was lost, and I was actually glad he was with me. In that moment, I was actually proud of myself for taking a risk, for pushing myself out of my comfort zone.

I should have known that feeling wouldn't last.

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