It was Tuesday. And on Tuesday, Xavier dreamed. 

Every creak of his bed sent nervous jitters scurrying down your arms. He heavily rolled over, muttering under his breath. Xavier was dreaming about you, and as he'd darkly informed you last week, he was dreaming about "particularly the bad parts." 

You curled underneath your blankets and hugged your favorite stuffed animal, Mr. Fluffy, to your chest. Disappearing from your life in Florida was supposed to mean a shiny-clean start at Nevermore. You'd buried the past, shoveled gravelly dirt and distance over its secrets, and now Xavier could rip everything back open. 

If he uncovered something that could ruin you, would he protect your secrecy and keep it to himself? Knowing Xavier's cold, "it's not personal" attitude, he wouldn't hesitate to spill your past if he believed you deserved it. 

Do I deserve it? It hadn't been your fault. You didn't deserve what happened. At least, that's what you told yourself. Even now, the flashes of memories crawled over you like mold. 

Stiff, yellow hay floating down like snow. 

A red and silver charm bracelet, glinting and discarded on the sawdusty ground. 

"They're more like me," she said, her red hair blazing and her green eyes glowing under the stars. 

With a shudder, you hurled your stiff, cumbersome blankets to the floor. They landed with a muffled thump, coiled up like a snake. Sweat pricked your forehead, and you shuffled across the dark shadowscape of your room into the shower. 

First, Tyler almost kisses you. Then he melts back into mundane coworker pleasantries and barely glances at you for the next two shifts. Now Xavier creeps, like a slow, unbidden spider, into your past. You shuddered, not wanting to revisit any of it. 

You loathed cold showers, but right now, the cool, heavy water felt bright and fresh like rain. You lathered your arms with a vanilla-scented sugar scrub until they were smooth and clean. You pulled a soft, black cable-knit sweater vest overtop a long-sleeved, white collared shirt. You put milky pearl earrings in your ears and a black-and-blue bow in your hair, fashioned from the uniform fabric. With the pinstripe mini-skirt, the outfit looked very preppy, like something straight out of the movie Clueless. 

Lavender morning light shone softly outside the window, and birds quietly gurgled and whistled in their 5am songs. You slipped out of the slitted bathroom door. Xavier stood waiting for you, his arms crossed and his expression sour.

"No morning showers. Remember?" He grumbled, sleepily shoving past you into the bathroom. "Keep your own rules, or I won't, either." Sleepily. As if he hadn't dreamed or witnessing anything upsetting at all. You swallowed, uneasy from his anticlimactic reaction. Is my past not dark enough for you, Xavier? 

"Well?" You challenged, copying his crossed arms and cocking your head. Xavier stared at you as if your eyes had popped from their sockets on yellow yoyo strings. 

"Well what?" 

"It's Tuesday. What did you see?" 

 Xavier barked a laugh. "Oh." He squeezed minty blue paste onto his toothbrush. 

"Oh," you repeated edgily, hoisting yourself up onto the bathroom counter next to the sink. You leaned forward expectantly. 

"Don't worry, (yn)," Xavier laughed, eying you wryly. "I won't tell anyone that your sophomore year boyfriend broke up with you, if that's what you mean."

"That's what you saw?" Relief splashed over you, mingled with curiosity. "Be more specific." 

"Fine." Xavier pressed his lips together and flicked his olive eyes up to the ceiling, as if inconvenienced by your questions. "I saw you fall for this guy, Luke, and I saw him drive you home in his Mercedes and I saw him bring you white roses. I saw him kiss you and I saw him give you a solid gold bracelet.  Yeah, and I also saw that whole scene where he compared you to the stars. I mean, really (Y/n)? How did you fall for that, he was such a cheeseball. A rich cheeseball, but still." Xavier trailed off at your hurt expression. He deliberately inserted his toothbrush into his mouth and brushed in tiny circles, removing his gaze to himself in the mirror. He'd gone too far, and he knew it. 

"I'm sorry I woke you up last week," you bitterly said, sliding back to the floor. "I didn't want you to know all that." Xavier had held no reservations in mocking your painful heartbreak. Xavier spit out his toothpaste and cleared his throat, as if a little ashamed. 

"Listen, don't worry about it." Xavier halfheartedly reassured, shrugging. "Plenty of people get broken up with, even ones that look like you. Nothing to be embarrassed about." 

Before Xavier crept out of the dorm for his morning jog, he tossed over his shoulder, "If I were you, I'd be happy that that's one of your worst experiences. You know, some people out there would kill to have gold bracelets and Mercedes rides." 

If only he knew. 

Before your first class, Enid texted you to meet her in the courtyard. The moment she saw you, she exploded into a grin and enveloped you in an enthusiastic hug. 

"Okay, I love the look," she immediately complimented, eying your black sweater and skirt appreciatively. "Do you think Weems will say anything? I mean, it isn't exactly in uniform."

"You know what I always say, Enid," you laughed. "If your outfit doesn't make you worry about getting dress-coded, then it's too safe." 

"Listen." Enid linked arms with you, dropping her voice to a low, thrilling whisper. "Remember that guy I was telling you about?"

"Yeah, that gorgon?" 

"Yes!" Enid dreamily sighed and then shook her head slightly as if snapping into focus. "What are you doing, tonight at midnight?"

You raised your eyebrows, interested. "Nothing, why?" Enid cracked into a scheming, mischievous grin. 

"It involves a chance at beating Bianca."