Los Angeles,

•06/11 {Thursday, 8:34 A.M}

~*~ Dorian ~*~

If I didn't like these therapy sessions before, today was totally different. I was happy to be here to finally understand what happened on Friday. I thought about it during three days, but couldn't come with an explanation. Like, at all. So, I gave up and waited patiently for this session.

Her behavior really confused me. Until this day, she was always so calm and then boom she had an attitude and was calling me a bastard. And she played with Ryver and I's mind also, but for what ? I was just lost and needed answers.

"Good morning, Mr.Willkingston. How are you this morning ? " She greeted with a smile. I stared at her outfit and as usual, she looked beautiful. She was dressed with a black skirt, white shirt and black Louboutin heels. Her makeup was simple. She had on some mascara -I think- and other things that I couldn't name, plus dark red lipstick. Her jet black hair was pulled into a bun. 

"Good morning." I simply greeted. 

"We're making some progress I see. It's been five minutes since we are here and you're talking."

"Yes, that's cool, right ? But let's stop all that bull and let's start the real conversation. What happened on Friday ? "

She beamed, "Oh...Well, simple...Ryver is what we call a very loyal friend and whenever he sees one of his friends in danger or just being accused for something they didn't do, he will always come to the rescue...and that's exactly what he did when I started accusing you of being a sick man, who has strange relationship with kids. By defending you, he also told us the truth that we needed to know." She explained typing something on her iPad. 

I was impressed. This woman knew how to play with minds very well. But fortunately for me, mine wasn't that easy to manipulate. I had to be more careful though, "Okay...I see now."

"Yeah..." She cleared her throat, "So...How are you feeling today ? "

"Uh...I've been trying to find a job lately." I said just to talk. It was getting old to be stuck in that room with her in a complete silence. I was tired of doing that. Yes, it was only the third session, but I was already tired of playing that quiet person for one entire hour. Actually, I had always been someone who loves speaking with people. I had always been the outgoing type of person, so playing that quite role wasn't for me. 

"Oh and how is it going ? "

"Well, since I'm a ex-con it's more complicated. As soon as they see my record, they send me home immediately. Plus, I didn't go to college, so..." I trailed off joining my hands together

"Well...Why not starting this now ? " She suggested causing me to raise my eyebrow. 

"What college ? " I laughed, "No. It's too late."

She narrowed her eyes at me, "Too late ? No, it's never too late to go to college. Some people even go when they're forty years old."

"I know. I wasn't saying this like that. I meant...it's too late for me. Like...I won't have the motivation to do this now. A couple of years ago, I would go, but not now. You know, I had never been a big fan of school to start with, so I feel like college would be too much for me at this point in my life. It's not for everybody anyways." I said and shrugged at the last sentence.

She nodded, "True. So, what are you going to do then ? "

I shrugged a second time, "Searching more and hopefully I'll find something before that next meeting with my P.O." 

She bit on her bottom lip and suddenly stood up putting her iPad on her chair. She walked to the door and opened it, "Uh...Malia, the maintenance team still needs people, right ? "

I smiled staring at the gracious move of her hips and then frowned wondering what she was doing. 

"Yes, Dr.Khimona. There is one place left." The Miss Malia answered with her pitch voice. It was really annoying by the way. 

"Okay, thanks." 

"You're welcome, Dr.Khimona."

She closed the door and sat back down, "Well..." She looked at me and smiled nicely, "...Do you want to be a...janitor ? "

"What ? " My frown deepened. 

She licked her lips, "The maintenance team is looking for more janitors since two weeks now a-"

I shook my head, "No ! I...I don't wan- It's nice, but no. Thank you, but no."

"Why ? "

"Uh...I...I want to find the job by myself."

She straightened up on her chair and crossed her legs, "But...You said it was complicated and I-"

"Yes, but I'm grown and can do things on my own." I smacked my teeth, "I try to make some effort and you're doing that shit ! " I began to raised my voice. 

"Please, talk to me with another tone of voice. I just wanted to help."

"I didn't ask for your help ! "

"Change your tone of voice, please." 

"I want to go." I said getting up.

She sighed, "Dorian...please, do not start now. Calm down and sit. We were talking, so let's keep-"

"Shut the fuck up ! Don't tell me to sit down ! "

~*~ Docia ~*~

Pride:

1) "A sense of one's own proper dignity or value; self-respect."

2) "Pleasure or satisfaction taken in an achievement, possession, or association: parental pride."

3) "Arrogant or disdainful conduct or treatment; haughtiness." 

4) "An excessively high opinion of oneself; conceit."

Pride can also be a poison. Pride can make a person act reckless towards people. Pride can be an obstacle. Pride can be arrogance. Pride is not always a good thing. It can be a kind of sickness, actually and if you ask me.

Dorian wasn't talking right now, but his Pride. 

He wasn't the one getting angry, but his Pride.

He wasn't offended by my gesture of kindness, but his Pride. 

And I wasn't appreciating it. 

He was acting like I curse him out, what wasn't the case. I was just trying to help him in his journey. That's why we met in the first place; for me to help him, with his emotions and feelings, but I could also give him a helping hand with other aspects of his life. 

But as you can see, not everybody deserves people to be nice with them. For a moment, I forgot, but thanks to Dorian and his disrespectful mouth I remembered now. This was the first and last time. From now on, I was just going to do my therapist duties. 

"Okay, you know what, get the fuck out ! " I pointed the door, starting to lose my patience with him.

"Do not tell me what I have to do ! "

"I'm going to say this just one more time..." I took a deep breath, "Lower your voice, please."

"Don't tell me wh-" I grabbed his arm and dragged his ass outside of my office, "Hey ! You can't do this ! "

"Yes, I can ! "

"Dr.Khimona, is everything alright ? " Malia, my receptionist and assistant, asked me worried. I reassured her with a head nod and she sat back down on her chair. I noticed that she had her right hand on the phone already, in case we would need security to come. That's one of the reasons she was working here, she was always prepared, no matter what.

"I want another therapist." He required with his arms folded. 

"I don't care, go talk to your P.O or whatever." At this point, I didn't even want to try with him. Not today. I thought we were making progress, but we were ten steps back. This one was hiding behind too many walls. And I couldn't break them all that fast. No, it was going to be a very long journey. An awful one. And maybe I wasn't the one for that. To help him to go through that tough time in his life. 

Being a therapist was so exhausting.

Patience was the key and today I hadn't enough in me to deal with his character. I felt like he was way too broken to be repaired, even a little. Maybe, there was nothing to do for him. Maybe, it was too late. I had sessions with him only three times and it was only the beginning, but it was so hard to make him open up to me. Usually, people would begin to confess by this time. And I'm talking about real confession and not the bullshit he kept giving me. I could do nothing with that, actually. 

"Yeah, exactly ! Why am I here if you don't care ?! Why would I talk seriously with you if at the end of the day, you don't fucking care ?! I don't know why they want ex-cons to have therapy so much, if nobody in that fucked up society care about us ! We're just criminals to y'all. Right ? " He shook his head and fanned me off, not giving me the opportunity to answer to his questions. When he said all that, I saw his unprotected eyes screaming for some special attention, "I'm done." 

Now, I felt bad.

"Wait." He didn't stop walking, so I actually had to go after him, "Wait ! I do care."

He turned around and laughed dryly, "No. It's not true. As your other clients, I'm just your paycheck. But don't worry, I'll be totally fine."

I looked into his eyes to see more and like the first day, they were still expressing this anger and sadness and I knew these two emotions were poisoning his heart to the point where everything around him didn't matter anymore. 

For him, life equaled negativity. 

And I had to change that.

Because, who knows what he could do with that state of mind, "Tell me how you are feeling and be honest."

He smacked his teeth, "Dr.Khimona, I-"

"It's for your well-being ! It's to help you, Mr.Willkingston ! You can't keep holding everything inside. You need to express it, to let it go or else it's going to ruin you, completely. Please, share your thoughts with me. I'm here to help you."

He sighed and wiped his face with his hands, "Isn't what you're saying to everybody ? " He chuckled, "I have to go."  And with that said, he entered in the elevator and left. 

I felt so defeated right now.

∫

∫

∫

"What are you thinking about over there ? Are you okay ? "

I got out of my trance and took a sip of my strawberry margarita. I couldn't help but think again and over again about Mr.Willkingston and mainly the expression of his eyes. He got that fire inside him that was slowly but surely destroying him and I'm not going to lie, it was seriously starting to worry me. Who knows since how long it was going on. He needed to open up as soon as possible before to explode. 

This situation somewhat reminded me of my past. Well, my ex and deceased husband, to be exact. I saw nothing before it was too late to provide support and he ended by losing his mind. I was way too preoccupied with other things to see how much he needed me and the pain he was feeling led him to do something terrible and unforgivable. 

"Uh..." I cleared my throat, "I'm alright. What about you ? How is Ryver ? " I didn't want to talk about my problems. I wanted them out of my mind for awhile.

Yemi weakly smiled, "We're not really talking these past few days. He's mad at me for punishing him. And...yesterday he said..." She trailed off causing my curiosity to pop out of nowhere. 

"What ? "

"He wants to go live with his dad for a couple of months."

"That jerk ?! I hope you told him no ! "

She rolled her eyes, "He is his father, I can't do that."

"Participate to create a human being is not being a father. When is the last time he asked about Ryver ? Like for real. Last Christmas ? We're in June now."

"Well, he called this morning asking if we were doing something for Ryver's birthday." 

"And what did you say ? "

She sighed and stayed quiet for a moment, "He got that bitch pregnant...again." 

I drank more. 

If I knew this guy was going to treat my best friend this way, I would've warned her sooner and tried my best to keep him away from her; but unfortunately he fooled everybody with his pretty smile and his good manners before to change for the worst and show us his real colors. No, you can't always tell when someone is playing a role, because sometimes people are just really talented in what they're doing and know exactly how to make others fall in their trap.   

I slightly frowned, "Do you still love him ? "

"No ! That's not the reason why I'm so angry. It's...the fact that he started his life over and completely put his first child out of it. That's not fair ! He had never paid too much attention to Ryver, but his other kids can have that great father figure in their lives, because..." She puffed shrugging her shoulders, "I can't get why they can have it and not Ryver." 

"Because he's a douchebag." I simply answered.

"That sucks." 

I nodded my head, "Yeah...But don't give him too much importance. And let Ryver have his own space, that'll give yours also. He's going to calm down soon."

She sighed and finished her margarita.

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A/N: Sorry if it's boring, but this chapter is actually a little foreshadowing, so I hope you paid attention while reading. 👀

THANKS FOR READING ! 💗

CissyItsMe 💋✌❤