#NewClassicNRO

Chapter 29
Sober

Although the alcohol was starting to take over me, I could still think straight―at least, that was what I thought.

However, I couldn't walk properly like I was about to fall with each step that I was taking. My body felt like it became way too heavy for me to carry. I was tripping on my own foot. My legs were turning jelly.

And so, for once, I surrendered myself to Jirro. I let him support me as I walked. He didn't just intertwine his hand with mine. He even pulled me close and wrapped his arm on my waist, his other hand resting on the side of my belly.

Every time I would trip, his grip would tighten, never letting me fall and hurt myself. Handang-handa siyang saluhin ako. It warmed my heart. I couldn't help but remember back when we were still in high school. He was always there whenever I fall or trip.

Because of that, since then, I'm never afraid to fall because I believe that he'll be there to catch me all the time. My Jirro would never let me hit the ground. And even though we broke up; even though I hurt him, nothing changed. Nandyan pa rin siya. Laging handa.

The strobe lights inside the bar caused me to feel dizzier. Mabuti na lang nang nakarating kami sa VIP area ay medyo umayos ang lagay ng paligid. The rave sound bursting through the speakers also weakened.

"Ano'ng nangyari kay Cloe?" nag-aalalang tanong ni Ike ang bumungad nang makarating kami sa table nila.

The members were all chilling at their table. Sina Sic at Isaiah na nag-uusap ay napatingin na rin sa akin nang mapansin kami ni Ike. Napansin ko ring hindi na kasama ni Isaiah ang ipinakilala niyang babae sa akin.

I wondered if that was his girlfriend... Puwede ba silang mag-girlfriend? Kung hindi bawal, puwede pa kaya kami ni Jirro?

Napapikit ako nang mariin dahil sa kung ano-ano ang aking naiisip. I should stop thinking about things which could make my headache worsened. Saka ko na lang 'yon iisipin kapag nasa maayos na akong kalagayan.

"She's drunk," Jirro told them.

Nilingon ko si Jirro at ngumuso. He must had noticed that I looked up to him, so he gave me a glance as well. Hindi ko alam kung namamalikmata lang ba ako ngunit nakita kong tipid siyang ngumiti at saka iginaya ang aking ulo sa kanyang dibdib.

Being wrapped up in his hold and with my head on his chest, it felt warm and comfortable that I fought really hard not to close my eyes. It felt like I belong there.

"You should probably take her home, Jirro." I heard Isaiah said.

"Yes, you should," pagsang-ayon ni Ike. "Ako na ang bahala magsabi kay Mr. Joel."

"I will," Jirro briefly replied.

Medyo naalerto ako roon. Iuuwi niya ako?

Dama kong binago ni Jirro ang pagkakahawak niya sa aking bewang.

"Pagpahingahin mo na agad Jirro, ah. Baka pagurin mo pa," mapaglarong pagsingit ni Sic.

"Shut up, you idiot," Ike immediately tried to hold Sic's tongue from speaking nonsense.

I felt Jirro slightly tensed up. His body went stiff for a fleeting moment before he relaxed, but his hold tightened more.

"We'll go ahead," paalam na lang ni Jirro at hindi na pinansin ang pang-iinis ni Sic.

"Okay. Drive safely," paalala ni Ike.

Hawak-hawak pa rin ako ni Jirro nang umalis kami sa kanilang lamesa. We were about to head out of the club when I remembered about Flora and the other staffs.

Ang sabi ko kay Flora ay pupunta lang ako sa powder room. Baka mamaya ay mag-alala siya at hanapin ako.

While we were on our way out, I tugged hard on Jirro's shirt. Naramdaman niya kaagad ang aking pagtawag sa kanya. Huminto kami sa paglalakad. Ibinaba niya ang kanyang mga mata sa akin.

"What?" he asked so softly, but it drowned the loud noises from the speakers.

Muli akong napanguso. "Magpapaalam pa ako kila Flora..." sabi ko sabay turo sa daan papunta sa aming lamesa. "Baka mag-alala sila sa akin."

Jirro was looking at me like he would do anything I'd ask of him. He quietly nodded and led me to our table. Parang alam na alam niya kung nasaan ako kanina dahil mablis kaming nakarating doon.

I saw Flora's face lit up when she saw me coming back. Napatayo pa siya upang salubungin sana ako. But when she noticed Jirro who was holding me close to him, her face was filled with surprise. Her jaw dropped. She looked like she just saw a ghost. Agad din siyang bumalik sa pag-upo.

That was when I realized that it was a mistake to actually come back here. Dapat ay nagtext na lang ako sa kanya. Baka kung ano ang isipin nila tungkol sa aming dalawa ni Jirro.

Ngunit bago ko pa mabawi kay Jirro ang kagustuhan na magpaalam, nakarating na kami sa aming lamesa. My team members present on the table went quiet at once. They all looked at me and Jirro with their eyes widened.

Alam nilang malapit ako sa banda, but I knew the way Jirro was holding me was something to be shocked and speechless about. Sigurado akong kung ano-ano na ang tumatakbo sa kanilang isipan.

"Cloe..." Hilaw na natawa si Gladys at saka mabilis na sinulyapan si Jirro. "Sir J-Jirro."

Ngumiti ako sa kanila kahit na halos na kay Jirro ang kanilang buong atensyon.

"Magpapaalam lang ako. Uuwi na ako," sabi ko sa kanila.

Tumango-tango si Gladys. She's still got that awkward smile on her face. "Ganoon ba? S-sige. Mag-ingat kayo."

Tumango rin ako pabalik sa kanya at tiningala si Jirro. Ang kanyang matalim at madilim na tingin ay nakadirekta sa aking team. He looked deep serious that even the senior staffs who were older than us were intimidated.

Bago ko pa siya maayang umalis na ay nagsalita na siya.

"Next time, don't let Cloe drink too much," Jirro told them coldly. "She can't handle alcohol well. She doesn't drink."

Kita kong medyo nanlaki ang mga mata nang iba. Hindi siguro nila iniisip na hindi ako umiinom dahil hindi ko sila tinanggihan kanina. I just accepted their dare because I didn't want to be a kill joy. I didn't want to be on their bad side.

"Uh, tatandaan po namin," maagap na sabi ni Jett kay Jirro na siyang patuloy na nagbigay ng shot sa akin kanina. "Hindi na po mauulit."

"Thank you," Jirro said. "We'll go now. Enjoy the rest of the night."

I smiled at my team one last time, especially Flora before Jirro took me away. Some of the guests at the party were greeting him enthusiastically. He was just nodding at them. Hindi na siya nakipag-usap dahil gusto na niya akong iuwi kaagad.

Mabilis kaming nakarating sa parking area. Maingat akong pinasakay ni Jirro sa front seat. He buckled the seatbelt for me. He made sure that it was tightly wrapped on my body. Medyo ibinaba niya rin ang upuan para mas maging kumportable ako.

After getting me settled inside his car, he went inside the driver's seat. Nilingon niya ako at tiningnan ulit kung maayos akong nakaupo. I shamelessly stared at him, making excuses inside my head that it was the doing of the alcohol in my system.

"You can sleep on the way," he told me, while starting the car's engine.

Nang madinig kong iba ang tunog ng kanyang sasakyan, doon ko lamang tiningnan ang loob. Hindi ito ang regalo sa kanya ng mga magulang niya. It was a different car from what he used to drive before. The interior looked expensive and luxurious. It must be bought from his paycheck as a member of the top rock band worldwide. I knew he worked really hard to earn a fortune.

"I'm proud of you..." I whispered absentmindedly while looking at him.

I saw his grip on the steering wheel tightened. His jaw clenched then bit his lower lip. Though his actions seemed firm and hard, I saw how his eyes softened while looking out the road.

Jirro didn't speak and just stepped on the accelerator. Kahit mabilis ang pagtakbo ni Jirro ay ramdam kong maingat pa rin ito. He would constantly glanced at me every time he had a chance to do so. While on the other hand, my eyes didn't leave him all throughout the ride.

Hindi ko napansin ang mga daan na dinadaanan namin. Nagulat na lamang ako nang pumasok kami sa basement parking. I had no clue where we were. Kinailangan ko nang ialis ang aking tingin sa kanya upang tingnan ang paligid.

"Nasaan tayo?" My voice was hoarse since my throat was parched.

Hindi nagsalita si Jirro. Itinigil niya na lang ang sasakyan sa isang parking slot. Once he retrieved the key form the ignition, he quickly went out of the car and went to my side.

"Can you still walk? Nahihilo ka pa ba?" maingat niyang tanong sa akin.

Umiling ako. "Kaya ko..."

Tumango siya at muli akong inalalayan. Habang nasa sasakyan kanina ay medyo nawala na ang hilo ko, ngunit nang tumayo ay muli akong nakaramdam ng pagkahilo. Although I was thankful that my head didn't hurt anymore, my stomach felt like it was being dug up. I swallowed hard to suppress what I was feeling.

Once we were inside the lift, I suddenly felt familiar to my surroundings. I felt like I had been there already. Nakumpirma ko ang aking kutob nang nakarating na kami sa harapan ng unit. I saw Jirro quickly pressed the numbers 1215 on the door's passcode. Tumunog ito hudyat nang pagkabukas ng pintuan.

He carefully led me inside the unit. It was the same unit where he asked the staff to send me the last time I came from the hospital.

"Bakit tayo nandito?" Muli kong sinuyod ng tingin ang buong unit bago ako pinasok ni Jirro sa loob ng kuwarto. Walang nagbago rito.

Jirro didn't answer my question. He just carefully let me sat on the bed. He opened a door inside the bedroom. It showed a hallway, looking like a walk-in closet. Gaya nang inisip ko ay lumabas si Jirro doon na may dalang ternong satin pajama at undies.

"You should take a quick shower and change into comfortable clothes before you sleep," he told me, his voice low and soft like a mellow song, while he removed my sneakers.

Like a kid rebelling to her parents, I shook my head and pushed my body on the bed to lie down. I had no strength to change my clothes. Gusto ko na lang magpahinga kaagad lalo na't nandito na ako sa kama.

Like he was having a hard time, Jirro sighed deeply. I saw him massaging the bridge of his nose right before he shot me an intense gaze. Even from afar, I could see his eyes burning with passion―but it was different from what I usually see in him whenever he talked about music.

"How many shots did you finish?" he hopelessly asked, standing straight after removing my shoes.

I turned away from him and lifted my hand. I folded two of my fingers.

"Three shots?" he probed.

Pursing my lips tight, I shook my head as I looked at him again. "Eight."

Kita kong bahagya rin siyang napanguso. Parang pinipigilan niya ang sariling mangiti.

"Right. That's eight," he said in a playful tone.

Smiling, I nodded, satisfied that he understood right away.

"But you should really change your clothes," pilit niya. "You won't feel comfortable that way."

He was right. I was still wearing a black shirt, tucked in a tight jeans. But I really couldn't lift my body again. Sobrang bigat na ng aking katawan sa pakiramdam.

I raised both my hands up, like reaching out to him. "Help me?"

Jirro's lips parted. I heard him whispered a curse.

"Hindi mo na kailangang magpalit kung ayaw mo," sabi niya na lang at lumapit upang ibaba ang aking mga kamay. "Nauuhaw ka ba?"

Since I was really thirsty, I nodded my head.

"I'll get you water," he said then immediately turned his back to go out and get me what I wanted.

Wala pang dalawang minuto ay nakabalik na si Jirro. May dala siyang isang baso ng malamig na tubig. He sat on the side of the bed to support my back as I sat up to drink. Nang napangalahatian ko na ang baso ay tumigil na ako. Umiling ako at saka sumubok na humiga ulit, ngunit pinipigilan ako ng braso ni Jirro na nakasuporta sa akin.

"Dapat ay ubusin mo 'to para mahimasmasan ka."

Makulit akong umiling. Walang nagawa si Jirro kung hindi ang hayaan ako sa aking gustong gawin. Napabuntonghininga siya saka inilapag ang baso sa taas ng side table.

He remained sitting beside me. His gentle gaze caressed my face. I didn't back down. I continued staring back at him.

Jirro tried to reach my face but he stopped himself when he was already a few centimeters close. Binawi niya ang kanyang kamay at inilapag na lamang ito sa aking gilid.

"You should sleep now. I'll go out to give you privacy," paalam niya.

Tatayo na sana siya para umalis, ngunit agad akong kumilos upang pigilan siya. I held his arm and pulled him closer, wanting to keep him beside me. Someone inside me told me to take advantage of the situation. Since I was under the influence of alcohol, I told myself that it was okay to act a bit aggressive. Pagbibigyan ko ngayon ang aking sarili.

"Huwag kang umalis..." Halos namamaos na ang aking boses. "Please... Dito ka lang..."

Kinagat ni Jirro ang kanyang ibabang labi. His strained expression told me that he was trying his best to be patient with me. It was like he was tightly gripping on the rope for his dear life.

"That's such a dangerous request, Cloe..." he whispered, his voice also became huskier. "But I'm also finding it hard to go against you. What should I do, huh?"

Kahit na mukhang nahihirapan ay nanatili pa rin siya sa tabi ko. Mas lalo kong hinigpitan ang aking pagkapit sa kanyang braso. His gaze grew deeper on me, and I was sure that I was mirroring the way he stared at me.

Ngunit kahit na mabigat ang kanyang titig sa akin, hindi ko alam kung bakit mas lalo akong nakaramdam ng ginhawa. My hand traveled down from his arm to hold his hand. I recalled how he intertwined our hands together and did the same.

"Miss na miss kita..." wala sa sarili kong sabi sa kanya. "Alam mo ba 'yon?"

Jirro's lips parted. Namungay ang kanyang mga mata.

I couldn't blame him why he looked shocked. Kahit ako ay nagulat sa aking sarili. But I couldn't care less as I was intoxicated. The alcohol gave me so much confidence to admit my feelings.

"Walang araw na hindi kita namiss habang nasa Talavera ako," pag-amin ko, nararamdaman ko ang pag-init ng gilid ng aking mga mata. "If only I could stay without abandoning my family, I would... If only I could let you come with us without being selfish and rub you off your dream, I would."

Binaba ko ang tingin ko sa aming mga kamay. My eyelids started feeling heavy. Sleepiness started to kick in.

"Pero hindi ko kaya, Jirro..." sabi ko sa kanya. "I'm sorry because I had to sacrifice you... us."

I heard Jirro breathed heavily. He renewed the way our hands were intertwined.

"Rest now... You don't have to say more," he coaxed me. "Let's talk once you're sober, okay?"

Though I had so much more to say, I unconsciously followed his order, especially when my eyes finally gave up. I couldn't keep myself awake anymore.

"Will you stay here with me tonight?" I still managed to ask a question before closing my eyes.

He exhaled lightly, his fingers pressed my hand gently to assure me. "I will not leave you. Don't worry."

Napangiti ako sa kanyang sagot kahit nakapikit na ako. "Thank you... Good night."

"Good night."