With the first ray of sun falls on her face, Naina stood from her place... Sameer keep staring her, noticing her each and every movement... whole night she didn't moved at all... didn't even cry any more... sitting in same position for so long makes her whole-body stiff and numb... the moment she stood, she fumbled but took support from the hand rest of the chair lying there before even Sameer stretched his hand to give support...

Without giving a glance to him, she moved out from his sight... he keep looking at her going away from him but didn't get courage to call her... to stop her...

Naina coming back to her room, pulled out her old dress from her wardrobe and straight went to freshen up... the moment she stepped inside, feels extreme pain in her lower abdomen... she didn't eat anything since last one day and staying out whole night in sitting position makes her condition even worst...

She was in pain, mentally and physically both... she slides on cold floor wincing in pain terribly, making tears rolled out continuously... keeping her hand on her mouth she tried best to not to let her voice goes out but failed miserably...

Sameer came back in room following her, but she was nowhere... he turned to go out to find her but stopped hearing her sobs from washroom... he knocked softly calling her name repeatedly but no response making him more worried for her... but can't help except waiting for her to come out...

Staying for a longer time in washroom, finally she gathered herself and taking a quick round of hot shower came out all dressed... due to severe pain she was not even able to walk straight... seeing her coming out with trembling feet, Sameer move towards her... he was about to hold her hand to support her when she stops him showing his palm...

She said looking into his eyes with a sardonic smile on her lips, "don't touch me... I don't want you to stain your hands by touching me..."

Sameer stunned hearing her but sure it's his own doing which turned up their relation badly... he freezes dumbfound looking at her and before he responds, she was already out from the room leaving him alone...

Naina feeling acute pain in her lower abdomen was not even able to walk properly but can't expect anyone to help her... she came out from room seeing Pandit coming from other side of the corridor towards her...

Pandit stopped seeing her pale face and gets more worried seeing her in this condition... after leaving them alone last night he was expecting things must have sorted out between them but seeing her condition he assures still the matter is unsettled... he rushed to stop her, "Naina... are you okay? where are you going...?"

Naina ignoring him left out without uttering a word... he is Sameer's friend cum brother... how could she expect him to understand her condition... even though he always treats her like his younger sister but if she doesn't have any relation with Sameer then no point to expect anything from Pandit too... he must be also having same view about her... Pandit keep calling her to stop until she disappeared out of his sight going down from stairs... seeing her, he could easily figure out how much pain she must be having...

Whole night her mind was absolute blank with having no idea how to handle this sudden situation and her life ahead... she has no support in her life at this moment... her own parents disown her long back because of their unjustified demands which she deny to fulfill... her only childhood friend has her own motive and no longer seems to be close to her any more... the only person left in her life is Preeti... but the way Preeti is getting into relation with Pandit, she doesn't want to disturb her life any more... if she stays back with Preeti, that will surely impact Preeti's relation with Pandit... and moreover she doesn't want to be in touch with any person who belongs to Sameer anymore knowing how much Pandit is close to Sameer... staying away from him is the only possible solution left with her to ease her unsettled life... she loves him truly and cannot bear to see anger and hatred in his eyes towards her...

Naina coming out from home, took an auto hurriedly and went to meet the doctor... she wants to leave this city immediately forever, without meeting anyone but with extreme pain in her lower abdomen, she must visit a Doctor first... after knowing her pregnancy, she had never gone for any thorough check-up and consult any gynecologist... she was only under observation of the Doctor who does her surgery when she got hit with bullet and was aware that the hospital was under Maheshwari group... everyone knows her there so she can't even visit to the same Doctor knowing the news will surely reach to Sameer sooner or later which she doesn't want anyone... not getting any other idea, she planned to visit the same Doctor who initially diagnose her pregnancy... at least no one knows her identity there and will not question her...

Naina reached the clinic and being the early hours, not many patients were there... seeing her waiting at reception in unbearable pain, Doctor recognized her and attended quickly... after a thorough checkup she gave her injection for an instant relief...

Doctor scold her a bit, "good you came just in time... it was a severe gastric attack... seems you had not eaten anything for so long and taking so much tension, makes it worst your situation... look at your eyes and pale face... you are not even taking complete rest and sleep... how could you be so careless... I know you were distressed initially knowing about your pregnancy, but you should take care of yourself... this will affect your baby and you too... I thought now you must have accepted the reality and taking good care of yourself, but you really disappoint me..."

Naina remain quiet knowing its' all her fault... not for her but for the sake of her baby she has to take care of herself... even last time Bela also advised her the same but the happenings since last night makes her extremely distressed, forgetting all other matters...

Doctor asked getting annoyed seeing her condition, "and where is Sameer... how could he allowed you to come here alone in this condition...? I thought at least he has some sense but seems you both are equally careless and immature..."

Naina shocked hearing that how did Doctor knows about him, his name... it seems she is very much familiar with him... but it's her second visit to this Doctor and she didn't even tell her his name ever... at the time of her first visit, she purposely left the column of family details blank except giving her personal number because Sameer strictly warned her not to reveal their relation to outer world...

Seeing her so shocked face, Doctor smiled, "jyaada mat socho... he is always in my touch since you first time visit me..." than she narrates how she called Sameer at the number given by her on the very next day and informed him about the complication of abortion...

Naina realized thinking, "isiliye uss din unhone mujhe bachaya tha... kaash nahin bachaya hota aur mujhe mar hi jaane diya hota... roj roj marne se toh achchha hi hota... unki aankhon mein apne liye nafarat nahin sahi jaati mujhse... meri bhi kya kismat hai... jis insaan se mein jaan se jyaada pyaar karti hoon voh mujhse utani hi beinthaan nafarat..."

Doctor breaking her trance spoke further, "vaise I must say Naina, you are very lucky... Sameer really cares for you... I have seen you so much disturbed after knowing your pregnancy, but when I talked to him, he was very calm... even he told me later how at last minute they manage to save you and baby from operation... since after that date, he called me so often to ask about what is good or bad for you... I think you don't have any elders at home who can guide you at this time... right?" she asked guessing as seems none of them have any idea how to handle this crucial phase of their life...

Naina nodded in yes but still confused and surprised that why Sameer is calling Doctor for her so frequently... is he needed some medical attention for himself, for which he called Doctor so frequently...

She asked, "par voh aapko kyun phone karte hain... aap toh gynaecologist ho na..."

Doctor smiled seeing her confused face, "tumhare liye aur kyun... ab tumhare saath koi bada nahin jo tumhein guide kar sake isiliye voh bohot jyaada dara hua rehta hai tumhein lekar... tumhein kya khaana chahiye kya nahin, kaun si medicine deni hai... ek baar toh mujhse puchh raha tha ki kis tarah ka mattress use karna chahiye tumhein iss haal mein... infact he was worried for you jab tumhein jara sa cold ho gaya tha... baap re, poora toofan macha diya tha usne sawaal puchh puchh kar... aur baad mein pata chala ki tum sirf do baar khaansi thi office mein... sachchi man kiya ek thappad lagaaun usko..." she laughed recalling how much crazy he was asking hundred questions on senseless matters related to her...

She narrates further, "aur jab khud bimaar hua toh pehle tumse related saari baatein puchhi ki kahin tumhein usase infection toh nahin ho jayega... bola agar aap kaho toh mein kuchh dinon ke liye kahin aur shift ho jaata hoon... apne se jyaada tumhari parwaah thi usey..." she laughed heartedly on his silly questions which he keeps asking from her regarding Naina's health almost every day...

Naina asked shockingly, "voh aapko hamesha phone karte hai kya..." now she understood why Sameer was staying in study room when he was not well and not wanted her to even touch him... With whom he was busy in chatting whole time when they were in restaurant for dinner...

Doctor said laughing, "bohot jyaada... yahaan tak ki ek din toh yeh bhi puchha ki gaadi ki speed kitni honi chahiye driving ke time... kahin tumhein jerks na lage isliye... gol gappe khaane dun ya nahin... Chinese food toh maine hi mana kiya tha... aur shayad tum bohot zid karti ho isliye ice-cream toh roj hi puchhta hai... I know you have very low immunity, isiliye mana kiya tha... tumhari saari reports bhi discuss ki thi mujhse jab shayad tumhara koi accident hua tha... mujhe toh lagta hai mein uski teacher ban gayi hun, roj mere lectures attend karta hai Bechara on how to handle pregnant women..."

Doctor caressed her hair talking sweetly like an elder with her own experience, "Naina, maine bohot husband dekhe hai jo apni wife aur baby ke liye concerned hote hai, par Sameer bilkul alag hai sabse... voh bohot darta hai tumhein lekar, tumhari health aur bachche ki safety ko lekar... jaise uski sabse anmol cheez ko koi nuksaan na ho jaaye... am I sure he will be the best daddy for your baby... jo aaj itani parwaah karta hai socho baby ke aane ke baad toh saari duniya ko paagal hi kar dega..."

"Lekin mujhe toh hairani hai tumhein aaj yahaan iss haal mein dekh kar... do din pehle hi Sameer ne mujhse sab discuss kiya tha aur tab tum bilkul theek thi... I mean aur tum yahaan  iss haal mein akele aayi ho... voh hai kahaan... infact I also want to meet him... mein kabhi mili nahin usase, bas hamesha phone par baat hoti hai aur voh har week meri consultation fees bhej deta hai... mein abhi usey phone karti hun aur usaki khabar leti hun... how can he be so careless about you..." she said getting bit angry on him to be so careless about her...

Naina stopped her immediately, "nahin Doctor... please aap unhein mat bataiyega aaj ke baare mein... yeh sab meri hi laaparwahi se hua hai... mein hi apni mushkilon mein itani ghiri huyi thi khud ka aur baby ka khyaan hi nahin raha... unki koi galti nahin inn sab mein... he will get very upset if he knew all this... please it's a request..."

Knowing Sameer's care and concern towards her she gets more confused on his behavior... the way he reacted last night and misbehaved with her is totally opposite what Doctor said... but at this moment, Naina doesn't want to see him at all... doesn't want his support and concern for her and baby any more... their relation becomes more tangled day by day... he behaves totally opposite what he said...

Doctor asked Naina to rest for an hour before leave and agreed to not to call Sameer this time, "I am helping you only this time but if I find you again so uncaring towards your health next time, I will surely call him... you both better starts taking care of yourself and baby..." she scolds her like an elder, giving all possible lecture...

Naina agreed and closed her eyes to rest for some time... after an hour once her pain subsides, she consults again getting lots of instructions from Doctor and left from clinic...

Sameer reached office but seeing her missing at her desk got more tensed... even Pandit checked with Preeti and confirmed Naina is not with her also as she herself is on leave for some personal work... to not bother her much, he hid all chaos occur in their friend's life... he knew well Preeti's temper and cannot handle her at this time if she knew what all had happened with Naina...

Pandit console him, "Sameer, dekh tu pareshaan mat ho... kahin nahin jaayegi tujhe chhod kar... aaye toh pyaar se sorry bolkar mana lena... dil ki bohot saaf hai... dil se maangega toh maafi pakka mil jaayegi... kaash phone uske paas hota toh location track kar leta... bas ek baar voh office aa jaaye, phir sab theek ho jaayega..."

Sameer, "dil ki saaf hai isiliye toh dil ki chot nahin sah paayi... aur maine jo kiya uske liye maafi milani bhi nahin chahiye... har saza manjoor hai par agar mujhse dur ho jaayegi toh nahin sah paaunga... bhale hi naraaz rahe par mere saamne rahe utna hi bohot hai mere liye... vaise bhi najare milaane laayak koi kaam nahin kiya maine..." his guilt himself killing him more...

Pandit asked suddenly, "par Sameer, tujhe yeh photo mili kahaan se... maine pata kiya tha ki kal koi courier nahin aaya ghar par tere naam ka... envelop par bhi sirf tera naam likha hai, address nahin... iska matlab koi apne saath ghar ke andar yeh envelop laaya tha... par kaun... aur kisi ne is tarah crop kyun kiya pictures ko... matlab saaf hai ki koi chahta tha tumhari ladaai ho... tumhare beech mein misunderstanding create karna... and luckily got succeed also..."

Sameer said after thinking, "Pandit pata kar uss event mein aur kaun kaun gaya tha... mujhe ek ek guest ki list aur saari footage dekhni hai... tu samajh raha hai na mera matlab... agar mera shaq sahi hai toh iss baar usey mujhse koi nahin bacha sakega... par pata nahin kyun mujhe yeh sab bohot ajeeb lag raha hai... sirf photo ka confusion toh aasani se dur ho sakta hai toh jisne bhi yeh bheji hai voh kuchh aur bhi chahta hai..."

Sameer paused and said with a worried look, "shayad Naina ko nuksaan... ya usey bohot jyaada pareshaan dekhna chahta hai... koi toh hai jo usaki khushiyaan nahin chahta..."

Pandit assured to find the culprit soon who create this rift between them but at present more worried about her absence... they have no idea where to find her....

Pandit, "par tu toh kuchh khaa le, tu ne kal se kuchh nahin khaaya... dekh teri tabiyat kharaab huyi toh usey kaise sambhalega... voh bhi subah se kahaan hai kuchh pata nahin... uski haalat bhi kaafi kharaab thi par meri suni hi nahin... tu hi baat karne ki koshish kar sakta hai... kal tak sab theek tha aur achanak yeh sab..." he said getting upset more... he himself was happy seeing their bonding but suddenly everything turned up back...

Sameer said with a faint smile, "that's what I deserve... ek photo dekhkar jaise maine react kiya agar usake liye voh mujhse nafarat bhi kare toh kam hogi... hamesha ki tarah mere gusse ne sab barbaad kar diya... kitne bharose ke saath maine usase dosti ka wada kiya tha par khud apni ek galti se uska vishwas, bharosa sab kho diya... pata nahin kahaan hai, kish aal mein hai... agar usey kuchh ho gaya toh khud ko kabhi maaf nahin kar paaunga... jab tak usey dekh nahin leta, usase baat nahin ho jaati mujhe chen nahin aayega... I just want to be alone... please..." Pandit left outside to search her and investigate who has created this mess between them...

Naina though initially planned to leave the city immediately after consulting with Doctor but after knowing his care and concern towards her makes her again confused on her own decision... she reached office quite late and went straight to her desk... if initially she was angry with him then now she is more confused... doesn't know either to hate him or to thanks him... his dual behavior confused her more... at one point he hated her and always humiliate her or the other end he cares for her beyond limits...

She can't deny that after hurting her, how he himself spent last night restlessly sitting close to her but didn't said a word... an utterly confused behavior of his... even in room also he tried hard to support her and wants to talk with her, but she was in no mood to talk with him and left leaving him alone...

Seeing time, she called a helper from other floor and instruct him to make coffee for Sameer... she guided him how to make as per his choice but didn't make it by herself... till now she is not settled herself enough to see him... nor want to forgive his deeds either...

Peon entered in Sameer's cabin placing the coffee on his table... Sameer looked him surprisingly asked, "why did you come with coffee... who told you I need it..." he shouts getting frustrated that might be Pandit send it for him...

Peon knowing his anger replied slowly, "sir, voh Naina madam ne jaise bataya, humne bana di aur dene aa gaye..."

Sameer somehow felt relieved that she is back in office but saddened that she herself didn't even make it and send it through peon... he denied and asked him to take it back... peon followed and took the coffee back... Sameer quickly opened his laptop and relieved seeing her sitting at her desk... but her gloomy face makes his heart shattered in pieces, drowning him in his guilt more...

Naina looked at the coffee mug back but didn't react... she keep herself engrossed in work... though Doctor instruct her to take complete rest for today but asking a leave from him was itself a difficult task for her... she doesn't want him to know her condition... even Preeti was also not around which makes her feel so lonely...

Pandit came back knowing from guards that Naina is in office... he straight went to her desk and sit pulling a chair in front of her... she didn't lift her eyes towards him...

Pandit said, "mujhe nahin pata kya hua tum donon ke beech par yaad hai na maine kaha tha ki jab bhi jarurat ho mujhse baat kar sakti ho... tumhein behen maana hai, itna bhi haq nahin mujhe ki tum apani pareshaani baant sako... pata hai kitna pareshaan the hum ki tum achanak kahaan chali gayi... aise koi karta hai kya... narazagi apni jagah hai par gusse mein aise ghar se kaun nikalta hai... haalat dekhi thi maine tumhari par tumne meri suni hi nahin..." he scolds her lovingly showing his concern...

Naina still didn't move, keep staring her screen without even blinking her eyes... Pandit seeing no response hold her from shoulder turning to his side, "dekho Naina, mein jaanta hun tumhara dil dukkha hai... galti Sameer ki hai, aur voh bohot sharminda bhi hai... mein yeh nahin kahunga ki usey maaf karo ya na karo... yeh tumhara decision hoga, par please ek baar usase baat karlo... kehte hai na bol dene se dil ka dard kam ho jaata hai... mushkilen sulajhti hai jab khul kar baat hoti hai.... yun dil mein baatein rakhne se sirf dard milega... donon ko..."

Pandit seeing her eyes wet said, "mere liye tum donon bohot maayne rakhte ho... kal subah se tumse milne ke liye, kuchh baat karne ke liye pareshaan tha aur phir raat mein achanak voh pictures... sab spoil ho gaya... tum donon yun dur dur rahkar khud ko aur ek dusre to sirf takleef de rahe ho... na usane kal se kuchh khaaya na shayad tumne... aise kab tak chalega... tum apni haalat dekho... agar usase baat nahin karni toh mein tumhein force nahin karunga par please tum apna toh dhyaan rakho..." he said with a faint smile to make her understand...

Naina still didn't respond at all, sitting like a statue in front of him looking down...

Pandit taking a deep sigh stood to go but turned looking her sitting standstill, "ek baat dhyaan rakhna Naina, ki jitni takleef tumhein hogi usase jyaada takleef kisi aur ko hogi tumhein iss haal mein dekh kar... ho sake toh uske liye hi apna dhyaan rakh lo jo tumhare dil ke bohot kareeb hote huye bhi bohot dur hai tumse..." he left still seeing no response from her...

Naina remain seated still in confusion what to do... a total mess... earlier Doctor and now Pandit... why everyone trying to make her believe that he cares for her... whereas his own behavior, his words denying the fact...

Badi Kashmakash Hai E Khuda,

Thodi Toh Rahmat Kar De,

Ya Toh Khwab Na Dikha,

Ya Unhein Muqammal Kar De...

If he is hard to love, but impossible to hate...

""When you love and hate a person at the same time, you need to decide which matters far more"

Next update very soon... 

Please do comment how you feel about Sameer's feeling and efforts for Naina...