Chapter 19
Will could not sleep quite well in this night. Every time he closed his eyes it felt like Thomas was close again. As if his warm breath would brush over Will's cheeks again, as if the scent of his aftershave would tickle Will's nose, as if his soft curls would tickle his forehead, and his lips would...
At the point Will always opened his eyes again. Even though part of him wanted to relive the memory, his other part felt horrible for even having it. Propped up on his elbows the young man stared into the dark. The almost perfectly pitch black night was only interrupted by his own breathing and Harry's occasional soft snoring.
He seriously hoped that his flatmate would not remember that Thomas had even been present, for then Will could not dodge any questions. He was such a bad liar that he knew, should Harry have a suspicion, and would only hint it, he would let it blow up by his inability to hide nervousness.
'But are you?' Thomas's words ghosted through Will's mind and tore him back to reality like a slap.
How ironic, he thought. Here I sit, feeling like I'm getting beaten up, while he actually might be. I should feel lucky. But he didn't. He felt guilty for letting Thomas go out all alone. He felt guilty for getting Thomas into staying so long. He felt guilty for kissing another man. "No", he whispered. It was him. It had been Thomas, who had kissed him, not the other way around. If they blew up, he could still get away. It was the truth, wasn't it?
A quiet sob escaped Will and he laid his head on his knees, while trying to choke his tears.
"Tom?"
Lenny tiptoed into his brother's room and silently whispered his name. The person curled up on the bed did not respond at first, only giving a weary and very much snapped "What?", after Lenny's third attempt to get a response. In the light of a lamp, Lenny could make out some bruises building just over the waistband of Tom's boxers.
"I told him not to do it", he brought forth while desperately trying not to cry. "I told him not to hurt you."
He heard a slight, broken chuckle from Tom, who now raised his head and looked directly at Lenny. The look in his tear red eyes, showing the same desperation and fear, but also determination to attack when necessary, you could see in a wolf's eyes in the moment before you would shoot them, almost frightened the boy enough to turn around to run. But the pure sadness showing on the rest of Tom's features made him decide against it.
"You really thought it would work, didn't you?"
The broken sound of Tom's voice send a stench through Lenny's heart. He nodded slightly.
"You know, his hand is starting to get less steady. He caught my back thrice."
Tom unfolded and sat up on the edge of the bed, his motions slow and his face pulling up into painful grimaces more than once. Lenny sat down next to his brother, and, as soon as he saw the dark bruises on Tom's lower back, started crying.
Tom put an arm around his younger brother, hugging him close. "I'll be fine", he managed to get out, without his voice trembling. And then a weak: "He knows, doesn't he?"
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