Chapter 59: Dead Inside
Here's an update guys sorry it took so long but thank you for the patience. I hope you enjoy it <3
*Andy*
I was sitting in front of my Tv zoned out and drunk. I had been working on this bottle of jack for the last hour and it was more than half way gone. My thoughts drifted to Rhylen. I wonder how she was, why hasn't she called me? Why hasn't she reached out? I missed her so bad and shed only been gone since this afternoon. But it dawned on me she doesn't remember me. Doesn't know the love we share. She's clueless. This is all my fault. If I never followed Rhylen out down the driveway everything could've been avoided. I set the bottle of Jack on the table and buried my face in my hands and wept. I couldn't take it anymore. I was so stressed I was so upset and I wanted everything to be okay I wanted Rhylen to be okay. She meant more to me than anything and it killed me that she didn't know who I was I was dead inside. I cried harder and stood up grabbing the alcohol and hurtling it against the wall watching it shatter.
"Rhylen baby I need you"
And with that I broke.
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*Rhylen*
I sat on the floor in front of the fireplace at David's place. I had a cup of tea in my hands and I sat staring into the fire getting lost in my thoughts. Everything was so crazy, my mom was gone? I was almost thrown in jail? There was no way that was true. But why would Andy lie about something like that? Andy! My mind drifted to him, I feel awful about the way I left things. But what was I to do I didn't know him, but that's the thing I did know him. I wish I remembered I wish I could be like the me everyone has been talking to. I sighed and took a sip of my tea and kept looking into the fire hearing it pop and crackle. The house was silent it must have been late I was downstairs on the couch and I couldn't sleep. I was brought out of my thoughts when a voice said my name. Instantly my head turned in that direction and I was looking at David dressed in sweatpants and a Tshirt.
"You okay?" he asked.
"I'm fine" I told him.
I thought he was going to leave but then he nodded and sat down next to me.
"Have you talked to Andy?" he asked.
I took a sip of my tea hoping it would calm my nerves.
"No, but you know that. Why ask a question you already know the answer to?"
David shrugged and ran a hand through his hair and sighing deeply. I tapped my fingernails on the mug and just kept looking into the fire and for a few moments neither of us said anything.
"Do you remember anything at all about what happened the night of the accident?" David asked.
I shook my head,
"Everything is coming back in pieces but they don't stay long. There like pictures and then they fade before I can put them together. So I don't remember anything" I explained feeling lousy.
I wish I did that way things would just go back to normal and things wouldn't feel like they're crashing down all around me.
"It just takes time, look I wanted to talk to you"
I looked at him now interested.
"About what?"
"Before the accident we had a pretty bad fight and I upset you. I just want you to know that I love you and I'm sorry about everything. I get that you wanted better answers than the ones I gave you but the answers I gave you were the only ones I had to give. I just want you to know that I'm sorry, do you forgive me?" he asked.
"Yeah, I guess. Do you feel better now?" I asked.
He chuckled.
"I'd feel better if you knew what we were talking about"
I took a sip of my tea.
"Me too."
We fell silent again and I bit my lip. I had so many questions but I wasn't going to ask because I'm sure the answer would upset me and I wasn't trying to sink any lower than I felt right now.
"Have you spoken to Andy?" I asked.
David looked at me and shook his head.
"No I have not. I'm sure the only person he wants to talk to is you, have you contacted him?"
I looked down into my tea cup.
"I texted him but he didn't answer so."
David rubbed my back.
"He's probably cooling down or he's asleep, you shouldn't be to hard on him"
I looked at him confused.
"What?"
"His little outburst today he's not normally like that. He's stressed he misses you, that's why I'm saying don't be too hard on him. He loves you, I can tell even if you cant"
I sighed and pushed my hair away from my eyes.
"It's not that I can't. It's weird I mean he has an effect on me when he's near me. My heart races and I feel all fuzzy inside. I know there's something there but I can't remember and that's what frustrating. I hate it because I feel it."
A tear spilled over my cheek and I quickly wiped it away but not before David seen.
"It'll all be okay it's going to work out you'll see."
I nodded I just hoped he was right.
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*Third Person*
Ryker sat down on the bed and looked at her phone annoyed while Ronnie crawled under the covers.
"You are going to drive yourself crazy babe. Don't read too much into it" Ronnie told her.
Ryker scrolled through her texts annoyed.
"Andy hasn't texted me all day. I'm worried about him he always texts me. Even Rhy isn't responding" Ryker told Ronnie.
Ronnie propped himself up on his elbow and looked up at her.
"Well you said Rhylen left earlier today right?"
"Yeah Cassidee told me she picked her up."
Ronnie flipped his hair away.
"Maybe Andy wants to be left alone. He's probably upset and doesn't want to talk to anyone. I'm sure he's stressed his girlfriend doesn't know who he is. I can imagine how devastated I'd be if you didn't remember me and everything we went through together"
Ryker nodded and laid down and watched tv with Ronnie glancing at her phone getting annoyed more and more when it didn't light up. They were about and hour into some movie when Ronnie sighed and got up pulling on a pair of pants.
"Come on, we'll go check on him so you can relax" Ronnie told her pulling a shirt of his head and Ryker nodded and pulled on a pair of shoes and hoodie.
---------------------------------------------------
The house was blaring music when the car rolled up in the driveway. Ronnie parked and they both got out of the car. Ryker didn't bother knocking she just turned the doorknob and walked in. The music was even louder now that they were inside. Ryker covered her ears while Ronnie looked around for the source of the music. They entered the living room that was empty except for the stereo the source of the music. Where the hell was Andy? The car was here which meant he was too. Ronnie walked over to the stereo and turned the volume way down. That's when Andy appeared in the doorway looking horrible.
"Andy?" Ryker said.
"What the hell? I was listening to that"
Ryker sighed, he was drunk.
"It was loud, you okay man?" Ronnie asked.
"I'm fine....what the hell you doing here?" Andy asked stumbling into the living room. Ronnie reached his hand out in case he fell but he regained his balance.
"I was worried about you" Ryker told him.
Andy scoffed and grabbed the bottle of alcohol on the table taking a long swig putting it back.
"Why?"
"You hadn't texted me all day. And I know Rhylen left today"
Andy's drunk blue eyes looked at Ryker as soon as the name of his girlfriend was brought up.
"Look just because I don't text you back right away doesn't mean you need to come over. I was busy" he explained.
Ryker put her hands on her hips and sighed.
"Yeah busy drowning yourself in booze"
Andy stood up quickly and nearly fell but Ronnie caught him by the arm keeping him upright. Andy shoved his hand away telling him he didn't help but started to fall before Ronnie grabbed him again making sure he was standing until he let go.
"You good?" Ronnie asked concerned.
Andy scoffed and reached for his bottle but Ronnie quickly swiped it before Andy did.
"Dude"
"Andy you've had enough" he told him holding it out of his reach.
"Andy maybe you should lay down" Ryker suggested.
"I don't need a babysitter" he spat.
Ronnie sighed and ran a hand through is hair.
"I'm not suggesting you do. You've had a hard day."
Andy pointed at her coming off balance for a second.
"What would you know about the day I've had hmm? My girlfriend left me today...and there was nothing I could so about it. Just up and left, know why? cause she doesn't fucking know who I am. You....can't- I-imagine how it hurts. She just walked out like I meant nothing...like I meant nothing!" he screamed angry.
"Andy calm down" Ronnie said walking over to him warning Ryker to stay back.
"I'm fine."
The room fell silent only the sound of Andy's footsteps pacing on the floor. He stopped and stared down at the table in front of his window. There lay framed pictured of him and Rhylen laughing and kissing. I heard him sniffle and suddenly he swung his hand back and knocked the photos of the table angry causing them to break. Ronnie grabbed him and Andy went to push him away but Ronnie grabbed him tight and that's when Andy stopped struggling and burst into tears. Ryker put a hand over her mouth. He was hurting so bad and his heart was broken. He needed Rhylen and he needed her badly. Andy dropped to his knees and Ryker knelt in front of him and hugged him before helping him up off the floor. Ronnie draped his friends arm over her shoulder and helped him to the couch. the minute Andy's head hit the pillow he was out like a light. Ryker knelt down and picked up a picture off the floor as the shards fell to the ground. The picture was one she had taken. Rhylen was on Andy's back he was hunched over laughing and she was making a funny face. Ryker smiled remembering that day but frowned. This was the Rhylen she wanted back, her best friend. It seemed that Rhylen now just walked around in zombie mode and barely spoke. This was taking a toll on all of them especially Andy it seemed he needed her more than anyone. He was broken without her, Ronnie knelt next to her.
"He's knocked out, what do you want to do babe?"
Ryker sighed.
"Lets stay the night here and get this cleaned up."
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