CHAPTER | ELEVEN | ALIZA | POV

"No! Isa that's too much salt!" I exclaimed at him as we both argued on how much salt the pasta would need. Right now my tongue felt as if  it would fall by the amount of salt.

"Its fine, you're just over reacting!" This had been going on for about five minutes now but we still hadn't come to a decision on how much salt the pasta needed. It could have been the fact that my taste buds have become a little too sensitive but it was still inedible for me and I was sure as Juhanam (hell) not going to eat that! 

"Fine then! Do what you want, I'm going out." The stubbornness side of me was coming out and that was happening quite a lot ever since we found out I was pregnant two weeks ago. Our family was over whelmed when we had told them as it was going to be their first grand child from both sides of the family. 

I could hear Isa calling me back,  but I continued to put my coat on since it was getting towards the chilly weather of September. There was a five dollar note in my pocket from our grocery trip earlier on so I didn't need to worry about paying for something.

"Habibti wait. I'll come with you." I shrugged at him and continued to walk out the door. The days were becoming shorter now and by now it was getting dark at just 6 o'clock. 

"Where are we going exactly?" He asked me while I looped my arm with his and thought about where we could go. Recently I had been getting cravings for ice cream and just by luck we had run out of it at home. 

"Lets go to the ice cream parlour!" The excitement  was clear in my voice and I certainly couldn't wait to go. It was meant to be a place kids went for birthday parties or just naturally for ice cream, but I hadn't been there in a long time and right now I needed those sundaes. 

"Lets go then!" He chuckled at my choice while giving my knuckles a kiss. I frowned at him in the dark as we rounded the corner to find all the stores on the high road. This was the place in town where all the stores, movie theatre were and right now it wasn't too crowded thank fully. 

"Come on!" I broke away from him and opened the door to the parlour hearing the ding of the bell just above the entrance. I've always loved coming here because they did amazing ice creams and Baba always used to take us when we younger. Thinking about Baba made me sad thinking that I hadn't gone over to their house this entire week. Quickly I let the thought go just as soon as it came as I would go and pay them a surprise visit tomorrow. 

"See anything you like?" Isa came up to me and scanned the little parlour and grinning at the kids that were making faces at him. Seeing that I couldn't help but laugh at how childish Isa could be sometimes and wondered if he would treat our child like that too. My hand went against the baby bump on my stomach and realised that even if the growth took time, the baby was still growing inside of me. 

"Can I have the toffee sundae with sprinkles, chopped banana pieces and cherry sauce please?" After the look I got from Isa and the person behind the cashier who went to get my order I realised how peculiar my sundae was. 

"Well, that was strange." Isa joked at me and got out his wallet but was too late as I placed the five dollar bill on the counter. Like a kid, I stuck my tongue out at him. 

"Well if anything, the cravings are your fault." Ever since being pregnant I've become more closer and somewhat more childish to Isa and I think he's been enjoying it. 

"Well I'm just going to have to deal with it about four more times." I could have choked on my spit there. It was out of joy though. Having one child, I thought would have been too much for him but he wants to have five?! 

"If you're lucky enough." My sundae had come and moving away from the cashier, I opened the door to go outside into the cool breeze of what Autumn will be in a few weeks. Scooping up the sundae with the plastic spoon, I scooped it in my mouth letting my cravings eat away in satisfaction.

It may have sounded like something strange to eat but honestly this tasted amazing. "Do you want some?" I offered Isa. Taking a look at it he shook his head at me and scoffed. This boy really needed to stop judging things by its looks. 

"Ready to go home then?" He asked as we were just stood outside not really doing anything apart from me eating. 

"I don't want to go home. Lets go to Ma's house!" I said in excitement. I also hadn't seen my in laws from the day we announced that I was pregnant. Mashallah they had been very supportive and of course really happy to know that they're going to become grand parents. 

He eyed me curiously before speaking, "How about we go there tomorrow and right now go home?" he suggested. 

"Why can't we go now?" I sounded like a child when I had said that but that's only because I wanted to go there now! 

"Just." Was all he said before walking off without me in the other direction. If he wanted to leave then fine, I may be his wife but I'm not going to follow him around like a lost puppy. Spotting a bench a few feet away I went over to it and sat down. I didn't think he would come back to get me, but he did and he looked a little angry. 

"Ali what are you doing? Lets go home." He sounded patient with me but there was also authority in his voice that made it sound he wasn't pleased with me at all.

Looking up at him I didn't know what to say. I knew that I have been a little harsh on him these past few weeks, but I couldn't help it. Both my mind and emotions were just all over the place and they are so hard to control. 

Not knowing how but next thing I knew my eyes started to well up with tears and soon a sob released from my throught. Soon enough I was crying into my hands without any idea why. I felt Isa sit down beside me and his arms were now covering me in an embrace trying to hush me up.

"Ali don't cry. I'm sorry. Look we can go to Ma's house now if you want." His voice was gentle showing that he cared and I felt bad right now because I was crying unintentionally and it wasn't even his fault.

Slowly I stopped crying altogether and faced him with my tearful face which probably looked awful right now. The sundae I had been eating had fallen to the ground from me crying and was just there splattered everywhere.

"No it's okay, it's me who should be saying sorry for being a big baby." I say to him and hug him back but even closer as it was getting colder as the night progressed. He was nice and warm and thats what felt good to be with him; he just made everything feel better.

Isa didn't say anything for a few minutes and neither did I. We carried on sitting there still in each other's arms while people gradually started to fade away in the distance till I could no longer see them anymore.

"Ali I have something to say to you." That was all it took for me to concentrate on him fully. These past weeks it had felt like he had wanted to say something to me but never actually had the courage to. It was getting on my nerves but then again I would never harass someone to say what they thought.

"Go on." I said back to him and broke away from our hug and pulled my legs up on the bench so that I was now seated Indian style, cross legged; Isa did the same with his legs and a little smile formed on my lips seeing that.

"Not here. I want to take you somewhere." He stood up as he said that and stretched out his hand for me to take which I did and stood there beside him while he looped his arm with mine.

We began walking in the opposite direction of home with neither of really saying anything to each other. It was a silent night with no one around and I appreciated it as most of the time you would get drunk people hanging around town which was something I'd rather never see actually.

The walk wasn't very long, in fact only about ten minutes when we had stopped walking altogether. As I looked up to see where we were though I nearly gasped; and it wasn't for a good reason.

Farhill was the place in town where no one liked to go, especially in the night. Drug dealers in every corner way, dried blood still stuck in alleyways and of course the scary people that came with the package.

Every single child, adult and senior knew not to every come to this area no matter if it was the brightest day in the world or if you were running away from zombies; this place was just off limits. Period. So why Isa had brought me here I have no idea.

"You haven't by any chance missed a turning have you dear? You know what, maybe I can wait to hear this another time. Yeah, that's a good idea!" I was freaking out right now and it was evident in my voice enough as well as my face expression that I was.

"I know that it's kind of scary right now, but this is important." His tone was comforting in the amidst of darkness and cold and I took that as the only warmth available and trusted his words.

I gave him a short nod and again we began walking though I only followed behind trying to keep up with him in case I got lost or some rapist decided to come and attack me from an alleyway. 

Though it was very strange to me as we passed every gold tooth man and witch like haired lady that no one even bothered to come up to us. In fact they had only smiled and gave a curt nod towards Isa which he replied with the same. Did they happen to know him or something?

My Elmo pjyama bottoms could clearly be seen even with from the faint light the lamp posts were given off and I could have sworn someone we passed sniggered when looking at what I was wearing. Maybe storming out of the house in your pyjama's and coat isn't a very good move.

"How long more?" I asked Isa hoping he would say not long left or anything along those lines to relieve me of my fear right now.

"Well we're here." We definitely had stopped walking and were now standing in front of an abondoned looking building with broken windows and graffiti walls. All in all it looked like the most scarriest place in the whole neighbourhood. I wondered who would ever have lived here before.

We didn't stand there for long though as Isa proceeded to lead me inside the building and I had no choice but to follow him inside. I'm sure I would have possibly been taken advantage if I stayed outside and sure enough he would be mad if i didn't came in.

"So what exactly is this place? And why are we here?" The questions flew out my mouth before I could stop them and not only that but my voice bounced off the walls making an echo affect and leaving myself with the only thing left to do: face palm myself.

Our walking session stopped and I saw that we were standing just outside a door, well if you could call it that as the screws had fallen off and the only thing that kept it up right was some strips of duct tape which was gradually starting to peel off too.

"I don't want to keep any secrets from now on. Remember I don't like talking about Venice? Well now you'll know why." My ears perked up at the sound of Venice because I really had not asked him about the matter because I knew it would upset him and I had also been waiting for him to say what the problem was.

"Okay." Was all I managed to say. 

I was half scared and half curious about what he had to say about this. What ever had happened in Venice really did leave him scarred a bit to an extent where he never liked talking about his experience there anymore.

It wasn't until he had opened the door till I saw the full surroundings of the small apartment that were covered in paint with words like 'kill' or 'sorry' and to be honest I had no idea what any of those meant or what they were trying to say. 

Was this supposed to be some kind of gang meeting place before or did someone genuinly painted the words on? The walls were cracking and the sound of a leaking ceiling could be heard in the distance. The atmosphere screamed 'dark' in a way that made me want to run away back home, but Isa's hand on my shoulder kept my feet glued in place on the ground.

"Isa what is this place?" My voice came out as a mere whisper now and it was on the verge of not making a sound at all. It was as what I had wanted to say wouldn't come out and there was a lot that I needed to say and ask.

"I found this place three years ago Ali." I didn't understand what he was saying to me. This place was his? Why had no one ever told me about this before; did anyone even knew about this place apart from me?

"What were you doing in a place like this?" I was scared to ask this question because I had no idea what the answer would be but definite that it would not be something like 'I followed the unicorn here'.

"Sit down. I'm going to tell you everything." I looked around the room and saw that the only place that I could sit on without breaking the furniture was the floor, but even that was covered in mould and dust which will most likely set off my hay fever.

After seeing that I was still standing, he let out a breath and went to stand in front of me while putting the door back in the original standing position to block off anyone seeing us. There was a dim light coming from the light bulb above our heads which I was grateful for so that we could at least see something.

"It all started when Baba had sent me to Boarding School in Venice five years ago. I had made a few friends but one of my closest ones had been the son of the mafia." There was a pause to what he was saying but I didn't say anything. This was something he had to tell me and I had no intention of interrupting him.

"I knew this because he trusted me enough to tell me and one day decided I should meet his dad. And I did." Another pause before carrying on, "His dad was really pleased with me and it felt good because he gave me the attention my own father didn't." He spat.

"I got so caught up with the affection he showed towards me and even went on a few missions with him. Dealing drugs, selling guns and knives; whatever people wanted I used to help sell."

"One day though, things got out of hand. They had refused to pay for the drugs we were selling and I was ordered to shoot them all. And I did." I couldn't help the gasp that left my mouth after he had said that.

He had killed someone? The thoughts ran through my head as he eyed me waiting for my reaction. I couldn't though, nothing left my mouth even if I wanted to scream or hit him for doing such a horrible sin, I couldn't do anything.

My feet started to move on its own accord and I found myself backing away from him in fear. The wall my back had found its way too wasn't much strong and I could feel the cracks on my back, but my eyes were on Isa who was also moving towards me.

"Ali please don't be scared. I didn't mean to." His voice was a whisper compared to how radiant it was before when confessing. 

Closing my eyes I couldn't help but feel sorry towards him. The regret was clear on his face and in his voice but the voice I needed to come out to comfort him and tell him that it was okay just wouldn't come out.

We stayed like that for a few minutes before I cleared my throat hoping that I would be able to finally speak to him. The silence that had fallen between us before was threatening; as if we were both silently threatening each other to at least say something to one other.

"Can we please go home?" I asked and I could see that wasn't what he expected me to say at all, but then again nothing came to mind on what to say in this situation. I was fearful of his past and sins but I was grateful for the man he's become to tell me the truth.

With a simple 'yes' he began leading the way back out from the apartment to which I followed closely behind. 

"Well it seems like she finally knows. Splendid." The voice came from the dark in front of us and I felt Isa stiffen up beside me. I looked towards the voice and Isa who had his fists clenched; what was happening?

 ***

Asalaamalaikum guys, I know, I know, quick update! I can see the chapters are getting a bit shorter than my usual six pages or something but I feel that those are too long and get a bit boring so if there's a need for long chapters then I will write them long!

There isn't much of a happy atmosphere in this chapter also but that's only because of what has happened with Isa and his past. Some of you might have thought I forgot all about the Venice situation but no. Kind of a cliff hanger this one and hope you enjoyed it.

Dedicated to @HijabiFreedom for being an awesome commentor (is that a word?) 

Have a Good Day and May God Bless You All.