CHAPTER | EIGHT | ALIZA | POV

Flood works. Those are the only two words I can think of to describe this situation happening right now; and there's no way of me stopping it.

"Ali promise we'll still meet up to go shopping even though you don't like it!" Farah was literally on the floor begging to me now and it wasn't helping that I still had a wedding dress to put on or that I would be married off in a little more than an hour to Isa himself. 

"Wallahi we will Farah, now please, I really need your help in getting ready." My voice sounded as if I was pleading, which in reality it actually was. Ma was silently laughing in the corner because she knew how stressed I was at the moment yet she still found it funny as I was more of the cooler person in the family.

Not my fault a wedding can stress you out, especially since its my wedding. Without even realising how fast the week had gone, the day to the wedding was finally here and in a way I was both happy yet sad.

 I felt happy that I was going to be spending my life with somebody by my side and also gaining a lovely new family who I hope I would be seeing all of today at the hall. Sad because I would be leaving my own family, my house whose comfort I've taken for granted all these years which now I have to leave.

Reassured though, I am going to be visiting back here a lot since there's no way I would imagine ever leaving my family and heap load of brothers by themselves without the company of me; they'd miss me too much. 

"Habibty you look gorgeous Mash Allah." Ma beamed at me through her eyes which I could tell were going to be filled with tears soon. I still hadn't even put my dress on and only my face was done lightly with makeup, much to my protest. Hugging Ma felt like the only thing I was capable to do right now because I couldn't even turn around to look at myself in the mirror.

"Jazakallah khair Ma, I love you." I said to her and I knew she knee it but it doesn't hurt saying it again after all that she has done for me and my whole family. 

"Aww look at this mother and daughter bonding session. I wish I was getting married." Just like that Farah got us both laughing and the tears that were threatening to spill out somehow managed to stay inside my eyes. I inhaled a deep breath while turning to face Farah and the long mirror that was beside her. 

If I was this nervous to looking at my reflection when all that was done was my make up, I wonder how I would be like when it comes to me looking at my reflection when I'm fully ready in my white dress. Finally though I managed to see my reflection and I smiled widely at how beautiful yet simple I looked considering they took over half an hour just to get all these cosmetics onto my face. Lucky I wasn't planning on using them again anytime soon. 

"Mashallah." I whispered more to myself than anyone else in the room around me. Looking at the time though and realising I only had about forty five minutes to get in my dress and put my hijab on, I rushed everyone out into the hallway while locking the door behind them.

Time to get the dress down now. The dress was hanging inside my wardrobe which was now fully open so that I could still see it. I took it out carefully, making sure not to damage anything on the dress or else Ma would have an absolute fit. The puffiness from the dress which was just below the waist line seemed to be catching my attention more though but I couldn't just stand around gaping at the dress when I have much more difficult task to do: get the dress on.

I slipped out of my clothes and unzipped the dress that was now lying flat on my bed and gently put the dress on. It had been a long time since I had worn a dress and it was due to the fact that they weren't really my thing, so I always stuck to maxi skirts or jeans with long tops. 

In this dress though I felt different, as if it symbolised my new beginning that I was about to make with Isa, its like it I want him to see me in it because I feel beautiful inside and out. Still cautious of the time though, I lifted the dress a little so that I could walk and went to open the door for everyone to come back in and by the looks of it, they were all excited.

 "Ali, can I please cry on how beautiful you're looking? Mashallah!" Farah shrieked and went to tackle me in a hug when Ma stopped her mid tracks. 

"No hugging until my daughter is ready. Time for the hijab now I think." It was my decision to wanting to wear a hijab on my wedding day because it would be pretty useless of me wearing my hijab nearly all my life then taking it off just because its my wedding day. 

I followed Ma back to my vanity and sat down on the chair while she took out a white laces hijab which have been passed down for generations in my family and used by all the daughters of Ma's family. It belonged to one of my greatest grand mother and originally from Saudi Arabia which was what Ma is; Saudi. 

Me being the only girl in the family meant that it was my responsibility to pass it down to my daughter or a cousin sister for when they needed it. Ma was now wrapping the material around my head and I could tell that her hands were shaking so gently taking her hands in mine, I helped her wrap the hijab and pin it in place so none of it would be falling anytime soon.

Only thing left to do now was the veil that went onto the back of my hijab. As it settled in place I turned to look at my three beautiful bridesmaids who looked absolutely stunning with their maxi red velvet dress which they picked out, going with their own choices of hijabs. 

Both of my bridesmaids were also my brothers fiancée and yes Adam is now engaged and I couldn't be happier for him. My last bridesmaid of course is my best friend Farah whom without, this wedding wouldn't feel right. I let all of them decide on their own outfits because I wasn't one to decide on dresses and I'm sure they would have better taste in clothes than I do.

 "I think we're all ready to go." I said to each any everyone of them and gradually the smiles on their faces grew bigger as they knew it was time to to leave now. 

"What are we waiting for then? Lets go!" Farah sure was enthusiastic yet gentle at the same time as we linked hands behind the others and made way outside my room and just at the top of the stairs. She made me wait in silence till the rest of them were at the bottom and finally we made our entrance down the stairs with our arms still linked.

The first thing I saw coming down the stairs was the boys dressed in black suits and oh did Adam and Akbar make their fiancées look down at their feet. Me and Far quietly giggled to ourselves as we saw what was happening and not once did the smile leave any of my brothers or Baba's face. 

"Ali, you look beautiful Mashallah. I can't believe my only daughter is getting married. Subhanallah." Now Baba was on the verge of tears and I had to get him in a hug to stop him from crying too. In fact I think I'd have to do that with everyone if they don't stop their eyes getting all watery. 

"Jazakallah khair, should we go now?" I asked everyone and silently they nodded at me, knowing that there was some sadness in them seeing me now leave this house. Its all for the best though. We all left the house in silent with me holding on to Mustafa's hand while my other hand was in Adams. 

I had a feeling though that Adam would be the one to miss me the most; being the one born after him, we ended up telling each other everything that was happening in our lives and even after he had left for college, I can safely say I was the one who cried the most. Him going away to college was hard for me so I have no idea how me getting married will affect him.

By the time we got into the car, the conversations began but I made no effort of joining in; I was too busy staring out the window with my head now leaning against Adams shoulder while his head rested on top of mine. I'm going to miss these brother and sister moments we share because even though I would be visiting, I know Adams not always going to be there.College is his big commitment and I'm proud of him.

The sight of green trees passed as we sped down the roads and the singing birds got me lost in their tune and I realised just how peaceful this day truly was.

"You okay Ali?" The sound of Adams voice snapped me back to reality and I gave him a brief smile which he returned back to me. I didn't say anything because I was afraid of what my mouth would utter and I doubt it would have been anything but cheerful. "You sure? Because we're here now."

I snapped away from his gaze to see that we really were here and that it was only me and Adam left in the car while everyone was waiting for us outside. Without wasting more time we both got out of the car and Baba locked it behind us. My emotions were all over the place right now as I wanted to both cry and smile at the same time from the celebration.

I felt the need to rush the boys away though because seeing them right now was not a good thing; and that's exactly what I did. They were hesitant though as they said their goodbyes and walked off to the men's section of the hall. Ma now came up beside me still not saying anything and took my arm with hers as we walked inside, bridesmaids behind us.

I took in a deep breath and looked over at Ma as in to say that I was ready to do this and no backing down now. She knew that and with a last smile at me we both began walking in the middle of the hall where there was now silence and all eyes were officially on us. 

There was no doubt that I was no nervous, but there also wasn't any doubt that I would be regretting my decision of getting married. Today was mine and Isa's day and we are going to enjoy some aspect of it. We were nearly to the front when I leaned in and whispered to Ma, "If I haven't told you this enough times before then I'm sorry. But I love you Ma and I hope today I make you proud, Insha'Allah."

Oh the tears were definitely threatening to spill out now and this time for both of us, yet it still never came. Ma simply gave me a look which I grew up learning that it was her motherly love look. Something about saying anything else to her stopped me though because now we were at the stage and I had to sit down while Ma went to get seated at the front table where my closest family sat.

I hoped one day I would be able to have that look for my children and there was no doubt that I wanted children. My thoughts were cut off there as the music came back on and at the same time the conversations began while I plastered a smile on my face to show that I was happy, and I really was.

One by one also, family who I knew and also didn't know started to come up congratulating me and making small conversation on how I was feeling and a few jokes here and there saying that they were expecting children soon. I laughed along with them but my mind was clearly not focused on them.

The time to start getting the ceremony started was taking too long and my patience was nearly running out. For some reason I wanted that right to be Isa's wife and the thought both surprised me and made me happy to think that I was to be somebody's wife.

All of a sudden the volume to the music had lessen and again the conversations between family members and friends had stopped as their eyes were on the door right opposite me. I had a feeling that the ceremony was about to start. Just then the doors opened and the first thing I saw was my future father-in-law along with Isa who seemed to have caught my eye the most.

Dressed in a black suit with a matching tie to my dress made him look stunning but that wasn't what completed the outfit; the black and white Nike blazers seemed to be standing out the most and at the moment I felt the need to laugh because never did I think he would be wearing them, especially at our wedding. Nevertheless, he still looked good. 

They came closer and closer and before I knew it they were already beside me as Isa took his seat next to me. I didn't look up even when the Imam took his seat opposite us with the documents with him. 

Then it started; the Imam read out what we had to repeat in Arabic if we agreed to the Nikah and Isa went first saying that he agreed while my heart fluttered a little hearing him speak in Arabic. Next was my turn and I repeated slowly after the Imam when finally I looked at Isa. He was already looking towards me. 

Too bad we couldn't say anything to each other as it was now time to sign the papers and this time I went first while Isa followed suit. All around cheers of happiness could be heard and the Imam congratulating us and our parents getting us in a hug. No doubt to say, that I'm now officially married.

"Ready to wear the rings?" My new Ma asked both of us and we nodded while we turned towards each other and the rings were handed to us. I stretched out my land in front of Isa and in a swift movement he places the silver studded diamond ring on my ring finger.

My hand wasn't much stable though and it shook a little as I managed to get the ring on Isa's finger, I finally did it though and looking up at him I smiled the widest smile I could muster and he returned it. Looking towards our family they were all cheering and clapping with the rest of the hall.

"I think we should go now." I whispered to Isa as the roar of celebration calmed down between the families and now it had turned to a mild clapping and chatting. 

"Yeah Mrs Isa Aziz, lets get going shall we?" I felt the blush creeping up on my cheeks as he held my hand and we both walked out the hall with another round of cheering from the families. Once outside Isa opened the car door for me and I got in while buckling myself in with the seatbelt. He went round to the other side of the car and came inside. 

"You alright?" He asked me as he started up the car. I looked at him and all I wanted to say was that I've never felt better, but I kept it in. 

"I'm okay alhamdulilah. You look good by the way." I didn't feel embarrassed to say that out loud to him anymore. 

"Thanks. I don't think it compares to you though." This time I looked him fully in the eye and smiled showing my pearly whites. He just chuckled at me and carried driving looking straight ahead. Not even a second had passed when he intertwined our hands together knowing that he was now allowed to do that without feeling guilty about it.

"You're enjoying this aren't you?" I asked him with a bit of sarcasm in my voice as he again chuckled at me without saying anything until a few seconds later. 

"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't." With that, he stopped the car and I took the opportunity to look out the window in front of us to see we were now parked in front of a two story house with a bright front garden filled with different coloured flowers all neatly planted and a pathway to where you could walk up to the house. 

"Is this our house?" I whispered over to Isa as I was already making my way out of the car with my dress in my hands so it wouldn't get dirty and so that I would be able to walk properly without falling flat on my face in front of my new husband. 

"Yeah. Like it?" As the question came out, his arms wrapped around my waist and we both looked at the house in front of us.

"Love it. Lets go inside!" The enthusiasm was now clear on my voice and I grabbed one of Isa's hand and led both of us inside the house. He hadn't said anything as I opened the door to the house and came inside. There was a little passageway in front of us with the stair case on the side. 

As we went deeper in the house to the sitting room, kitchen and out to the garden, I realised how similar it looked to the drawing in my room. The main colour was blue with patterned wallpaper just below the ceiling going round the rooms. Turning to Isa, I crossed my hands when letting go of his and spoke up, "Why does this look so familiar?". 

"I may have gotten the house designed like the drawing your room that said dream house." He scratched the back of his neck nervously as he replied to me. I had no idea what to say to Isa at all and luckily I didn't have to because he took my hand once again and we were now out of the garden and on the stairs case going upstairs to where I'm guessing the actual rooms are. 

As we got to the top of the stairs his hand left mine and enveloped his arm round the side of my waist. I didn't respond to him, instead I looked ahead at the four doors in front of us and wondered what they were for. I knew one of them had to be our room and the other a bathroom but what about the other two? 

"Isa? What are the rooms for?" I asked him while looking up to see him too were looking ahead at the rooms in front of us. 

"One for us, the bathroom and obviously we need room for our kids right?" He gave me a wink and went over to one of the doors and opened it waiting for me to follow before he went inside. So I followed and gasped as I went inside. There were adjoining rooms, one a dark green yet turquoise colour and the other a light lilac colour which seemed to go well together.

"These are going to be our kids room. And I though it would be better if they were joined. We can always get them separated if you want though." He said the last bit cautiously as if I was going to have a fit about the rooms being joint. To be honest I found it adorable that he cared enough to even do this. 

"Are you kidding? Its amazing!" I said honestly to him and I think he must have been relieved to hear that because the smile on his face had returned as he began telling me the plans that would happen in the rooms. Just by the doors there would be the beds or cribs and cribs and their wardrobes behind the door while the window would be right opposite their beds. It sounded perfect to me. 

"That's amazing." I repeated my thoughts to him and without any warning I enveloped him in a hug. It took a few seconds before he responded to my hug and hug me back. It felt good to be hugging him and even better to know that I'm permitted to do all this now.

"You wanna see our room now?" He whispered in my ear as we were still hugging. I simply nodded and broke away from him as he led me to what had to be our room now. Once inside I saw a queen sized bed with crème coloured walls and three flower portraits that were smaller than the last in a line going down horizontally. 

There was also a wardrobe leaning against the whole of the wall with sliding doors. I took in the surroundings around me and walked round a bit with Isa's hand still in mine. Stopping at the foot of the bed I saw my kaftan I was supposed to be wearing to the reception for the wedding and just then my phone began to buzz in my other hand. 

"Hello?" I asked through the phone. I never bothered to look at the caller I.D, I never really do. 

"Do you think you'd be coming back anytime soon?" It was Akbar on the phone and sighing I told him a 'yes' and ended the phone call. I didn't understand why he was asking that though and as soon as I looked at the time on my phone, I literally fell on my butt on the bed, dragging Isa alongside with me. 

"You alright?" Isa asked worriedly and I don't blame him for being worried. I would be too if someone did that in front of me. Turning to face him I could see the genuine worry on his face, "Isa, we were meant to be back half an hour ago." 

Even he was thinking about this now and he hurriedly got up and began walking out the door. 

"Where you going?" I called after him confused. Did I do something wrong? 

"I'm giving you space to change. I wouldn't see you like that unless you wanted me to and we have to get going too." He smiled and walked out the room leaving me in awe of how mature he was sounding rather than the over grown hormonal teenager he usually was.

I didn't have time to waste thinking about this right now, so I got up and with a quick reflection in the mirrors from the doors of the wardrobe, I got out the dress, careful not to rip anything though; it was a tad delicate. Picking the kaftan up from the bed, I got it on and went through my side of the wardrobe to try and find a suitable hijab since all my clothes were now here.

Finally finding one, I placed it on my head and placed it securely with a pin and getting rid of the heels that I was wearing I went for some flats with a pretty bow since wearing my trainers were out of the option now. With that done, I hurriedly wiped off the make up that was on my face since it was annoying me. 

Taking a final look I opened the door of the room and found Isa leaning against the opposite wall and it reminded me of how I pushed him out my room when he came over for the first time. 

"Done." I said to him when he still hadn't looked up from the floor that seemed to be oh so interesting. He finally looked up and raked his eyes up and down before smiling and stretching his hand out for me to take which I did and we made our way down in silence.

 I don't think I would get used holding his hand because of hot soft and warm it was or the fact that my hand fit his perfectly. 

"What you thinking about?" He asked when we were seated in the car. The music was now playing through the radio to Drake- Don't worry we're going home and I was caught up in that until he cleared his throat and asked me the question again. 

"Oh nothing, just thinking how quick this day has gone." I replied back and it was true that this day had gone faster than I'd imagined but it still wasn't over yet. He simply nodded at my response and carried on driving to the hall where the reception was taking place. 

Throughout the car ride it didn't feel necessary to say anything because the music was filling in the silence for us and it wasn't one of those uncomfortable silence, but rather one where we could just think up on our thoughts; like I was doing. All the emotions going through me before the wedding seemed silly now because I already felt that little connection with Isa which I had a feeling would be growing deeper as the days went by. 

Being with him right now made me even question the feelings I had for him. Was I starting to love this boy beside me or is it too soon for me to develop these kinds of feelings for him. Just then I remembered something which Ma and Baba had taught all the kids in the house when we were young: 'If you love somebody, remember to love them for the cause of Allah because nothing is deeper then loving someone and having Allah beside you.' 

I knew straight away then that even if it was too early, I love Isa and not just because his looks or his wealth, but because of Allah and he is now my other half, my spouse and my husband; the one that would be guiding me through the rest of my life and being there with me in difficult times right from the start.

Just looking at Isa right now made me think of the life that we might have in the future. Would we have kids? Grandkids even? The thoughts made me happy but I knew that I was thinking too far on this matter but Insha'Allah, one day. When the car stopped moving I realised we were here now and from far I could see the sun setting in the horizon but it was now time to go enjoy with our families inside and as Isa took hold of my hand outside the doors I felt complete.

Opening the doors and taking the first few steps, the rose petals began coming our way and I could see all around us happy faces along with cheers of celebration. 

"This is amazing." I managed to say to Isa after the enormous amounts of hugs we were both getting and the refusal of money that never seemed to stop coming from the Aunties.

 "It really is." He agreed with me as we both dug in to the beautiful vanilla cheesecake that was in front of us. It truly was beautiful though and I couldn't help but carry on eating, not caring what the guests thought about my eating manners; they never were good anyway, its what happens when you grow up with boys. 

"Calm down. You have to sleep tonight too." He joked with me and I returned it with a humourless laugh. Though I really had to laugh at his reaction though because him scowling had to be one of the funniest things I've seen. His mouth went into a straight line across his face and it looked like he was biting his lip from the inside to stop him saying anything.

"What's so funny?" He asked and even though my laughter didn't stop, I attempted to reply back to him, "Your face!" 

It didn't come out that clear but it was enough for him to understand. Silently as if he was mad at me, he looked back down at his own plate but I could still see the smile playing on his lips. Nonetheless I decided to let him play his little sulking act and got up from the chair. 

"Where you going?" He asked as he got up as well.

 "Going to dance. Wanna come with?" I asked him but he refused and sat back down. I was a bit disappointed but still got up to join my family and friends on the dance floor. Farah was first to see me and grabbed my arm to drag me along with her. 

Never had I danced so much at a wedding before and parties doesn't even come into the equation since I never bothered with them. I danced with all my brothers, parents and of course Farah who never left my side once. Once the song we were dancing to ended a silence came upon us while some moaned and the others like me took the opportunity to catch their breaths. 

I didn't even notice the tune of the song until I saw people moving out of the dance floor and couples starting to come in; it was a slow dance. This song was meant to be for me and Isa to dance to but he refused to dance earlier on so I'm guessing he still doesn't want to dance. 

As I turned round to go sit back down I nearly had a heart attack from the person standing in front of me holding their hand out for me to take; Isa. So without keeping him waiting, I took hold of his hand and he pulled me in as we both began swaying to the music.

 "Isa?" I called out to him as he finished twirling me around. 

"Yeah?" He replied out to me. My head was on his chest so I couldn't really look up to see what expression his face held.

 "Are you happy?" I think I chose the wrong time to ask him that question because just then the music ended and everyone began applauding, which also meant that it was time for me and Isa to go. He looked at me apologetically but still took my hand and we both began walking outside.

 The rose petals seemed to have come back and once again they were thrown at us while we walked out. Everyone came outside with us and were still there when we said goodbye to our families and entered the car. He still hasn't answered my question and I guess if he was still thinking about the answer to the question then I shouldn't question him about it more than I need to. 

We were now at our new house and to say that I was tired had to be an understatement right now. I had been awake ever since praying Fajr in the morning because I couldn't get the events of what was happening today out of my head. Now that its all happened though I just want to have a nice relaxing shower, pray Isha and go to bed; doing anything else right now seemed oblivious to me. 

So I didn't wait for Isa to get out the car and nor did I wait for him to unlock the door because he already told me earlier there was a spare in the tree plant beside the door. I could faintly hear Isa behind me so I kept  the door open for him and switched on the lights before going up the stairs and in the first room which was our room.

I didn't waste any second before jumping into bed with my kaftan and hijab still on. I will take it off, just not now. My eyes were closed but I could still hear the door closing to our room and I'm guessing it was either Isa or we have a bad case of Jinn in this house. Taking me by surprise when I was lifted up back on to my feet I let out a small scream and now my eyes were fully open to see Isa standing in front of me with no sign of amusement.

 Before I could ask him anything, he beat me to it, "Ali listen, I wouldn't have chosen to marry you if I thought I wasn't going to be happy. I haven't known you for that long buy still everytime I see you, you make me smile and right now I feel more proud than anything else to say that you're my wife!" 

I had no idea what to say to that and it looks like he wasn't expecting an answer because at that moment he decided to take my lips with his. It finished just as soon as it started but I was still speechless and had no idea what to do now. I've never been told that before or been kissed by a boy; so what do I do?

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that." Isa mumbled more to himself than me and began to move away until I grabbed his arm to pull him back. We stared at each others faces for a bit and I wasn't thinking of saying anything to him or even returning the kiss, instead I pulled him in for a hug which was all I wanted right now. 

My head lay on his chest as I listened to his heartbeat while he had his arms around my waist and his head on top of mine. I didn't pull out the hug for a long time because I enjoyed being with him like this but after a while I did pull back though. I couldn't tell what he was feeling by the expression of his face but I decided to break the silence that was between us.

 "Isa I'm going to be honest with you. You don't have to be sorry for saying or doing things like that and really I'm sweating a lot right now, so shower time." I smiled at the end of that in hope to get him smiling or at least laughing and it worked as he smiled and pulled me in for a hug one more time but this time for a mere second before letting go.

 Walking away from Isa to the wardrobe, I slid the doors open and got out my floral pyjama bottoms with my cookie monster t shirt. Isa was eyeing my clothes but now had a smirk on his face for some reason. I shrugged it off and walked out our room to the bathroom to try and get a relaxing shower.

 I hadn't seen the bathroom when Isa was showing me around but it really was pretty with blue tiles to match the decor of the house. So taking my hijab and clothes off I went inside and in about fifteen minutes I was done and in my night clothes. Reluctantly walking back to our room without my hijab on made me feel nervous because I hadn't shown anyone my hair for years apart from my family.

Resting my hand on the doorknob, I took a deep breath and finally opened the door to see that Isa wasn't even in the room. The breath I didn't know I was holding finally got out and I walked inside and to the bed where I sat cross legged for a few minutes before deciding to get up and go look for where Isa could be. Before I left the room though I put my hair up in a messy bun because that's the way I like my hair being.

 I left the lights on to our room but still continued to go downstairs which I had a feeling is where Isa was. Boy was I wrong. I checked the garden, living room, front room and the kitchen but he wasn't there. Knowing Isa, I even checked the cabinets but he wasn't there either. 

Was I that bad that he already decided to leave me on the first day? By now my head was facing downwards as I went up the stairs to get my phone and see if I could phone him. Though I didn't get as far as going in our room because the lights of the other two rooms were lit and I could have sworn they weren't before; either Isa was in there or a thief. 

It didn't matter if it was a thief, the thought didn't scare me as much as it would have if I was younger but I still went up to the rooms and without hesitating I went inside.

Both lights of the rooms were switched on but the first thing I saw when coming inside the room was the figure sitting cross legged on the floor just under the window and I didn't need to worry if it was a thief because I already knew it was Isa. Slowly I made my way up to him and without uttering a word I sat dow next to him copying his actions and sitting cross legged. 

"What's wrong?" I asked out to him but my voice was barely audible and that scared me a little of how much I was already beginning to worry about him. Then again that could be a good thing. 

"Just thinking." Was all he replied back to me but I knew there was something that was bothering him so I tries asking him again. 

"Isa what's wrong and don't just tell me that 'you're thinking'." I quoted speech marks to what he said even though I didn't need to since his head was facing down on to his lap.

"Aliza. What if I don't cut out to be the husband that you wanted or can never treat you right? What if I can't be a dad to our kids or-" I cut him off with my hands pressed against his mouth so that he wouldn't say anything else. Without thinking about it I groaned about how stupid he was being right now. Did he actually think he would never be a good dad or husband?

"Listen Isa you better listen because I'm not repeating this again: whether or not you be a good dad or husband in the future all I want is for you to try. We got married today and you're already losing hope? That's not the person I though I agreed to marry. You should know better than that." My voice was soft towards him and for a few minutes he kept quiet. 

"Can I tell you something Ali?" He asked me and I simply nodded while facing towards him to see his head was now raised and looking at me. "I think I'm starting to fall for you." He said and all signs of sadness were gone and he now had a smirk on his face making me wonder why I ever bothered telling him all that.

Whacking him at the back of his head I spoke up, "Well it was going to happen anyway." I now had a smirk on my face now and at the same time I stood up ready to leave until he had to pull me back. 

Just at that moment the doorbell rang and I looked at Isa confused but he just had the same smirk on his face like he knew this was going to happen. 

"That's for you." I didn't bother arguing with him but instead got up on my feet to see who it was. Who in their right minds would even come to someone's house at this time of night? By now I was standing in front of the door and Isa was right behind me with his hands on my shoulder as if encouraging me to open the door. So I did. The person at the door though was not at all who I was expecting it to be. 

"Salaam." Sia said to me and even though I was in a state of shock, I still manages to reply to her. 

"Let her in." Isa whispered in my ear and I turned round to look at him like he was mad but his eyes were on the door, waiting for me to open it for her. I turned back round again and did what he told me to. I may not like Sia very much but I was curious to what she was doing here.

With long strides, she came in through the door, past us and into the living room which only left me and Isa to follow after her. Before going inside the living room though I gave Isa one of my glared but he simply kissed my forehead and ushered me inside like this was too important for me to miss.

"So, what brings you here?" Emphasizing on the 'you' when I asked her and I knew she caught that but I couldn't care less right now. Then the thoughts of what I was doing made me stop; I shouldn't be acting like this towards her no matter what she's done to me in the past, I can't let my behaviour now ruin what I know is right for me to do. 

"I just came here to explain to you and then you can see why I did what I did that day." I could see why she came here now and I already knew that Isa was a part of this because he hadn't said a word since she came in. I gestured with my hands for her to carry on talking.

"I wasn't one of Isa's girlfriend and heck I didn't want to even say those things to you." Then why did you? I thought when she took a pause for breath. "The reason I even did that was because I wanted to see how faithful you were to Isa. I know that you hardly even knew him then but you still defended him and that's when I knew you were the right person for him hence the reason I never bothered you again."

I was left dumbfounded by her explanation and I still had no idea what to say to her. She did all that just to test me. I looked from Isa to Sia and saw that they were both waiting for me to say something. 

"I'm sorry for doubting you." Was all I could manage to say right now and even though she was shaking her head I completely ignored her and went over to give her a hug to which she returned. 

"I think you should be leaving now Sia. Its late." Isa piped in and we had no choice but to break away from the hug. We walked her to the front door when I remembered I had something to ask her. 

"Sia wait." She turned back around and came up to the front door to where we were standing. "I forgot to ask. Where did you two meet?" In a way I think her face lit up when I asked the question on the other hand, Isa went stiff next to me. 

"Oh we met at school in Venice. He once saved a girl from getting bullied and that's when I knew I had to be his friend. Well I'm going to go, night." With a cheerful wave, she left and I waited until she was out of sight before I closed the door. I remember that  Venice was something Isa never wanted to talk about so I kept quiet about it.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked." I apologised to him and tried going upstairs but he was already blocking the way to the staircase not letting me pass.

"Why you sorry for?" In a way I could see that he knew what I was apologising for but in a way I don't think he did. 

"I know you don't like talking about Venice and well, that's where you two met." For a couple of minutes I watched how he closed his eyes and inhaled in a deep breath before opening his eyes again. 

"Yeah I don't but you don't have to apologise for it. One day I'll tell you; just not now." I respected his decision and nodded more to myself rather than Isa. 

"Can I go up now?" I asked him but he just shook his head and wouldn't budge. "Isa I have to go pray." After saying that he slightly budged just enough for me to get through and I did but it was too tight for my stomachs comfort.

 Halfway up the stairs I looked back and saw his head was facing towards the floor. I didn't say anything and carried on back up the stairs so that I could pray; though why is he not praying? Even if I didn't get him to pray now, I would at least try to get him to pray Fajr in the morning Insha'Allah.

I still had wudhu from my shower so I didn't really have to go make a mess in the bathroom but I do need to know which direction I have to pray in to face Makkah. The app for that was already on my phone so when I had gotten the direction, I took out a prayer mat which took me quite some time to find and slipped on a hijab from my wardrobe.

Raising my hand and saying Allahu Akbar, my Salah started and everything else around me became a blur as I only concentrated on my prayer between me and Allah. Today half of my deen was completed and in my Dua's I sincerely thanked Allah for it. Not only that but asking for forgiveness for everybody was what I always asked for and a happy life for everyone in this world.

 Finishing off my Salah I folded the prayer mat in half and put it back inside the wardrobe as I took off my hijab. Just then Isa walked in and it was then I realised he too had changed in his pyjamas and that we were both wearing cookie monster shirts. 

"You like cookie monster?" I asked him out of the blue and he suddenly turned around and looked at what he was wearing. 

"Yeah. Ever since I was little." I could have made a cooing sound when he told me that and it took a lot of my mental strength to stop from doing so. Instead I smiled cheekily at him to which he rolled his eyes at but for some reason began coming closer to me.

He came closer and closer but I didn't budge, instead I looked down at the phone in my hands and began typing my reply back to Farah even though I knew he was still coming closer to me. Suddenly my phone was gone from my hands and I looked up to see Isa holding it in his hands and for a moment I thought he was going to go through my phone which I didn't mind but he didn't. 

"I usually don't sleep with a shirt on." Gulping I continued to look straight at him. "But you wouldn't feel comfortable." I gritted my teeth together for him making my heart beat fast like that; it seemed not that bad when he said it but then I realised I would be uncomfortable because I've never been in that situation before.

"Well looks like you're going to have to wait." I said teasingly back to him after I had calmed my heart down so that it was back to its normal pace. We were back to teasing now and it didn't even seem that the mini conversation we had about twenty minutes ago even happened. 

"You have beautiful hair. Can I see it?" I broke out of my thoughts and eyes him to see if he was serious or not; he was serious. Who am I to question his request though when he now has a right to see my hair since he's my spouse, husband. Still looking up at him, I took the hair bands out of my hair and let the messy bun that was my hair fall down past my shoulders and flow halfway down my back.

My hair had never been one to go curly or wavy even after the numerous attempts from when I was younger to try and  curl it. Over time I realised I should just let it flow naturally straight, not that it even mattered after the age of fourteen when I had began to wear it full time in front of others.

"What do you think?" I asked him about my hair. Before he said anything though, he ran his fingers down my hair and pulled it to both  sides of my face. 

"Its soft. And beautiful." I thanked him and got the hair bands again to put my hair into a ponytail. At that moment I began to yawn and I realised just how tired I really was. Too much had happened today and thankfully for the best.

"Maybe its time we went to bed Isa." I told him and he nodded as I got in bed and I assume he went to switch the lights off, which he did. My alarm for Fajr was already on and by the time he got in bed with me my eyes were nearly drooping but I still felt his arm snake around my waist and pulling me closer to him. I didn't try moving away because I was just too tired to move so leaning on to him, I let myself fall asleep. 

***

Stirring around in bed from the sound of my alarm for Fajr rang, I opened my eyes and searched around for my phone to turn the alarm off. It was still dark out but not much so my eyes were squinting from the amount of light coming from my phone screen.

With a single tap I switched the alarm off but I felt Isa move around and I guess he had heard the alarm ring. Makes my job easier to wake him up for Fajr so that he can pray alongside with me or lead and I follow. 

"Isa?" I shook him by the shoulder and he simply grunted and moved back round to his side with his back facing me. "Isa get up, we have to pray Fajr." I tried shaking him again and this time he turned round and finally opened his eyes to look at me. I bent over to the bedside table and switched the light on to the lamp so he could see me.

"What's wrong?" His voice sounded so tired and for a second I contemplated whether or not I should let him go back to sleep; though I didn't. 

"You." He stared at me blankly. "We need to pray Fajr." I made it clearer but he didn't seem fazed by what I just said, instead he continued to look at me with his sleepy face. "Well you're going to have to get up. No day is better than starting it with Salah." I tried reasoning with him to try and get him to get up from bed. It seemed to work as he got in a sitting position on the bed.

"Okay. I guess I have to get used to this." I don't know what he meant by that even when he got up to do wudhu I kept thinking about why he behaved like this whenever something Islamic comes up. Was he not a very religious person? Though the things that he's done before does tell me that he knows his things in Islam and Shariah. 

I didn't even realise he had come back from the bathroom until he cleared his throat and nudged me to get my attention. I looked away embarrassed and got up from the warm bed to get my wudhu done to pray.

Washing, my face hands, hair, ears, neck, arms and my feet I was done and without bothering to dry myself I got back in the room to see Isa in a white thawb and that made me smile a little. Walking past him, I got my hijab and prayer mat and he waited for me to stand behind him before he began leading the prayer.

It was peaceful and praying Fajr today felt more blissful than praying the other days and the reason is probably because I now have a husband to lead the prayer and thanking Allah together for allowing us to get married. When the prayer was finished, none of us said a word to each other and even though I was fully awake now I didn't feel like starting a conversation right now since he might be tired. 

I watched him get back in bed and roll on his sides to fall asleep while I stood there taking my hijab off. This boy really surprised me by the way he behaves; sometimes he can be a little child while the rest he can be a grumpy teenage girl on her monthly.

I didn't want to sleep right now but on the other hand I didn't want to wake Isa up either because he looked pretty tired. So I grabbed my phone from the bedside table and quietly made my way down the stairs and into the living room, probably the kitchen later on to get some food but right now I needed to sit. 

It was still about half four in the morning but I'm sure I would get a chance to sleep away the tiredness later on as we're not going to be doing anything today. Guests were supposed to be coming over to congratulate us but we decided not to do that just yet as we need time to settle in the new house and get used to things around here.

Clicking the home button on my screen I saw that there were a dozen notifications both from Facebook and iMessage, most of which were texts from Farah and congratulation messages along with the wedding pictures. I had to say that the pictures looked really good Mashallah and it was better than what I expected them to be. We did have a photographer but those pictures are going to have to get developed so that should take a while itself. 

Nothing on my phone seemed interesting right now and I couldn't text Farah because she was probably asleep right now; she'd always knock out after praying Fajr because it's that early in the morning. It was always earlier in the summer because the days were longer which meant that the sun rose earlier aswell.

Thinking about that made me realise just how close Ramadan is coming up. Ramadan was coming precisely next Wednesday and to say that I was excited for it was an understatement. Fasting in Ramadan was one of the things we were used to doing though in Isa's case, I have no idea.

Luckily I did get him to pray Fajr this morning but he really did seem annoyed by the fact I did that. Nevertheless I'm doing this for his own benefit and conidering there's no school today because it's Sunday, I could have a little talk with him and explain it to him. But what if he doesn't like me doing that also? Oh, if only Ma was here right now, she would know what to advise me on but still I don't think she's been in this situation before with Baba.

Baba was the one who taught us how to pray and read the Quran along with Ma but we can all safely say in our house that is was Baba who acted more upon the religious acts whereas Ma taught us the importance of life and Allah and how we can learn to appreciate things we were given.

Then again I was now a married woman and even though it felt weird thinking about it, it was true and it's time to start behaving and thinking like one if I want to please Isa. Not everything will please him I admit, like when I have to pray Salah but in time he will learn to know the importance of it, I'm sure of that.

The silver studded ring on my left hand seemed to glisten in the half dark, half litted room and that's when I really looked at it. It really was beautiful but knowing Isa, he must have spent a lot on it, which is not what I wanted out of him. It was more a western culture to wear rings and I suppose I could have taken it off if I wanted to, but for now I'll just keep it on.

Peeling my eyes away from my left hand I decided to get up and wander round in the kitchen to see if I could find anything for me to eat. Me nor Isa had eaten since we got home yesterday and safe to say, that's the longest until I went to sleep that I hadn't eaten. Hopefully they had stocked some food or it looks like we were going to have to go grocery shopping later on in the day.

I switched one of the lights on in the kitchen because it wasn't very clear enough to see but it wasn't that dark either so only one light was enough. I saw the fridge just near the door and I went over to see if there was anything in it. Just my luck, there were a few things in here such as fruits, vegetables, yoghurts, drinks etc. Not in the mood for any of those things though, I decided to try the cabinets.

One of the cabinets were filled with cutlery, the other tinned foods and the last one had boxes filled with cereal. Cereal was nice in the morning since that's what it was made for so I took out a box of Coco Pops and went round trying to find where the bowls were kept.

Finally I found one and began pouring the cereal along with some milk from the fridge and putting it to warm in the microwave. I had never been one to eat cold cereal because it felt weird to me, but that's just my perspective on it. I wonder how Isa liked to eat his cereal.

I whacked my forehead with the spoon and instantly regretted it as the cold metal touched my skin. Little things like these always made my head lead to thinking of Isa and how he felt about these things; whether he liked it or not. I knew though that I had to start paying attention to Isa if I wanted to know how he liked things done or more simpler things like what his favourite food is. 

The beeping noise from the microwave brought me back from my thoughts and I  quickly took the steaming bowl out from the microwave and set it on the table for a few seconds to cool before taking it with me to the dining table. Taking out a seat from the table, I planted my butt down on it and began munching after saying Bismillah. 

The growling coming from my stomach had stopped now and I was really enjoying my cereal until I heard footsteps coming downstairs. Isa couldn't be coming down could he? Taking a last bite from the spoon I jumped out of my seat and put the dishes in the sink for me to wash them later on. We have a dishwasher but I'd rather wash them with my own hands like I've been doing for years. 

"Aren't you going to sleep?" Hearing his voice made me turn around to face him but that wasn't a good choice because his face was only inches from mine. I closed my eyes and gently pushed him back from me; I still wasn't used to being close to a boy before. 

"I'm not tired." My voice came out low and my eyes were still closed. Peeling them open so I could look at him I saw that he was still staring at me intently. "Is there something on my face?" I asked a little stupidly. 

He shook his head but said nothing. Again he came closer to me even though I pushed him away a mere minute ago. I really didn't know what was happening; was I supposed to have already lost my virginity to him on the first night or is it for something else he's coming closer to me. I definitely was not ready to lose my virginity right now and he must have some common sense to see that. 

"Whoa Ali calm down. You just have a piece of Coco Pops stuck on your shirt." What? I looked down to my shirt to see there really was a piece of it there. Embarrassed by what I was thinking before I got it out and placed it on the counter. 

"Sorry. Overreacting." I mumbled to him and tried walking away but he simply caught my arm and pulled me back to him as my back slammed against his chest. His hard chest. 

"Stop saying sorry. I shouldn't have gone that close to you anyway." Hearing that I knew he would keep his distance now but for a reason I didn't want him to. He's my husband now and quite frankly if he wanted to come close to me then he should. There's just me that's a problem. I overreact. 

"No that's okay. I shouldn't even be getting worried about you getting close to me. Its just that, this is all too new for me." I explained and even though I couldn't see him, I could still feel his head nodding as my back was still on his chest. He must have realised this and let go of me.

"Are you going to be down here for long?" I looked at him suspiciously as he said that but he carried on. "Because you might get tired later on in the day." I understood what he was saying now and silently I took my hand in his and began walking upstairs to our room.

 Once in our room we got into bed straight away since the lights were already off anyways. Lying in bed with my eyes still open I figured something; I would be losing my virginity to Isa soon. The thought both frightened me and made me happy to think that if I could have his kids then I would be delighted. 

The frightening part was me wondering when I would ever be ready to make that decision and go along with it. My eyes closed with the mixed feeling still in my heart but I knew when sleeping that at least I wouldn't have to worry about it for a while. Or so I hope.

***

Salaam, I'm sorry for the long wait on this chapter and the fact that the description for the wedding is vague doesn't help the situation. Nonetheless I hope you enjoyed the chapter and I'm trying now to update more regularly so that none of you's get frustrated with me! Another thing; sorry if this chapter is not even that long, but I tried to get this done as fast for you guys but also tried to make it lengthy.

Also, what do you think about the ending part about her knowing she's going to be losing her virginity soon? And don't worry, I won't be writing about what happens in there because let's face it, that would just be haraam and I would be mentally scarred along with the rest of you!

Dedicated to @ssimplyynina for giving an awesome comment and I don't know if you're still reading to see this but this is for the support you gave me! Hope you enjoy reading.

Have a Good Day and May God Bless You All.