Chapter 5

POV: Eli Blackwood

I can't begin to explain to you the level of frustration I feel with my mate at this moment, but I feel it. Deeply. It's an all-consuming thrumming throughout my body.

The situation in his household is concerning. I don't understand the details, but I do know that an omega running away from home and being afraid to be mated are not typical reactions. Omegas are nesting creatures and want the safety and comfort of the known. An omega wouldn't run from family if they were safe.

I loosen my tie. I'm so angry that I am overheating. My wolf is prowling, snarling that our omega isn't safe.

'Calm down.'

I breath deeply, trying to calm myself.

Until I have resolved my feelings about this and checked out the household, I am not fond of him returning there. I mean, I don't want him to go home. I want him to come to me. I have found my mate. He should be with me.

That seems out of the picture for now, however, so I need to find somewhere else to put him.

"Just like you would for any other omega, Eli."

But he is not just any omega in the pack. He is my mate. My omega and, therefore, my responsibility, even if he isn't interested in being my responsibility yet.

I have been doing a lot of research this week, which is why I haven't set up a meeting with him. Asexuality and Aromanticism are confusing to me. I don't really even understand how it works. I mean, yes, it's all there in black and white, but I don't understand his experience.

I want to have a baseline understanding before I meet him face-to-face again. I want to understand his concerns. I need to be able to address the deep-seated fear in my omega before I feel comfortable approaching him. I need my wolf to calm down as well, but I also doubt that will happen without getting some answers.

From what I've seen described online, it's just an absence of whatever sexual attraction is or a reduced experience of it. I don't even think that's the correct way to summarize it. I think that's just how I can process the information.

Mate bonds usually trigger intense feelings of sexual desire and romantic feelings. I went and asked one of the pack doctors about explaining the mate bond to me, and that was their general summary. Which, I suppose, reinforces some of the concerns that Luca has about an alpha having limited control over themselves when it comes to claiming an omega.

Based on all of this, I can understand why my mate thinks he is seen as abnormal as an omega. As a whole person, though, I'm not sure his lack of sexual attraction or romantic attraction really makes him abnormal. He has never experienced it. That's his normal. He still felt the bond, though, but not in the intense sexual or "love at first sight" way a lot of wolves experience.

Luca thought he was just anxious and that, as his Pack Alpha, my presence was just calming to him. That's not exactly what I was expecting from my mate, but I will take that. As an alpha with an omega, I think his feeling safe with me gives me a larger sense of satisfaction than any of the other thoughts I've had since I laid eyes on him.

And oh, have I had thoughts.

I can't lie, especially when he mentioned that his heat was starting, that I definitely felt the desire. Omegas, especially ones in heat, are generally very in tune with themselves as sexual beings, but my little one seemed not even to consider the notion.

I know exactly how compelling the scent of an omega in heat can be. While I have always stayed clear of omegas, as an Alpha, I have had to assist with omegas whose heat came at the worst time for them. You have to have a significant amount of strength and restraint as an Alpha to keep away from them, and that is why the pack medical center keeps diligent records about their cycles and where they reside.

If an omega is ever harmed or goes missing, as Luca did, the medical center lets us know when their next heat is. I suppose if I hadn't immediately called him, I would have heard from the med team about his heat. It's just that when I was told he was missing, I panicked and needed to know that he was okay immediately.

I found Luca on social media. Even without being an omega whose biology is meant to attract their alpha mate, Luca is a very attractive guy. He's small. Far smaller than the average beta male, petite with a balanced masculine frame. The sharp lines of his body and face were accompanied by an effortless grace, showing that he was somewhat fit, though not muscular. He had a softness that drew you into the comfort he offered with little thought.

Luca is very comfortable with his presence. He was definitely fashionable in his style, which was represented in mostly dark or neutral, well-tailored, sleek looks that refused not to be stylish. His preferences, though, also showed his desire not to draw attention to himself.

Luca didn't seem to register that he is, well, wow. I glance at my phone again. I have been distracted ever since I hung up with him. In his pictures with his eclectic group of friends, highlighting life on his college campus, you could tell that he tried to blend into the background even when he clearly could not.

His presence was commanding, but not in the intense way that was suffocating and overwhelming. It was his softness, the way he seemed relaxed, with calm, bright eyes, and the warmth he exuded. When he was right in front of me, Luca seemed quiet and demure, even though the reality was that his fire blazed bright. Everything about him spoke of elegance, but I now knew that with that elegance also came a firecracker of a man who wouldn't be pushed into doing something that he didn't want to do.

He was absolutely beautiful in every way that I had uncovered in this short time.

I couldn't wait to learn more about him. I shoved my phone into my pocket. I, at least, knew he would be safe now. Luca did send me his location and room number.

I sent a beta wolf with a care package my mother had quickly put together. Prepared fruits and desserts from a bakery associated with the pack. She added little lavender tea cookies and cinnamon coffee cake per my suggestion. Mother also added a few supplies we had lying around to help, like a heating pad and a weighted blanket. And I love her for this one. Mother added one of her favorite books by Virginia Woolf.

While my little omega was apprehensive about our mating, as soon as I got home, I told my parents, though I asked them to keep the information private so it didn't spread through the pack. I respect him wanting to keep his parents from finding out. I believe that some of the things he says are not his beliefs about himself, but rather what his parents have said to him.

Mother knew who he was. Luca didn't spend a lot of time in the pack community or the pack house itself, but when he was there, apparently, Luca had led a little writing circle for aspiring young writers. I found out that it kept going after he left for college, and he had always made time for it during his breaks, but he hadn't stopped in at any of the meetings since he had returned after graduating. It probably had something to do with all of these silly dates his parents were putting him through.

I shook my head before I allowed myself to go down that spiral again. I needed to wrap up my work. I was used to late nights and working through the weekend, but that wasn't going to cut it anymore. I had to make sure I set aside adequate time for Luca so we could learn from each other, especially if I could not rely on any of the typical behaviors of my species to strengthen our bond.

Another term I learned from my research was queerplatonic. It was a type of relationship that was very common for aromantic people to find themselves in. That gave me hope. I wanted a relationship with my omega. I want kids. I was also beginning to understand the depth of his feelings around the issue.

It wasn't that Luca was simply against mating. He just wasn't particularly fond of the idea of mating based on traditional ideals. He wasn't opposed to pairing, but the expectations around it frightened him. He wasn't even opposed to children, as he claimed to love them. The aspects of his omega nature that prioritize interest in mating weren't there for him.

Luca said that if we one day got there, he would be fine being Luna and giving me an heir, but that, at this moment, it was daunting. He was already concerned about having an alpha, but now he had THE Alpha and the expectations that came with it; he was overwhelmed.

I am really glad I looked this up. I am exceedingly happy that I had such a huge week of meetings, which gave me time to read up on this. I had so many misconceptions based on our brief conversation, and the reading and videos I watched gave me some really good questions to ask him.

"Okay, Eli. Get to work."

~

It's late in the evening when I return home. Objectively, I accomplished a lot, but I struggled to focus. Everything in me screamed to "go find your mate", but I reminded myself that I couldn't go for many reasons. The biggest is that my mate was right. I hadn't even smelled his heat pheromones, and I was struggling with the fact that my mate was in the city in heat. My very attractive mate. I sighed, making my way up to the Alpha residence.

The Packhouse was more of a community center. Since arriving in the area, we have always managed to separate ourselves from the humans. As their population grew, we created a border around our lands for privacy. As our population grew, it became less feasible for all of the wolves to live in the pack house together, so we started allocating small plots to build on.

Over the years, it had been forgotten that this was simply a family settlement, so in modern times, most humans think this is a luxury home community because my family lives here. It's just a small township, to be honest, where a large population of the pack lives rather than blending in with the humans. We modernized the pack house, converting the first two floors into a community center for food services and activities that cater to the pack youth and older wolves. On the 3rd floor were dorms that people could apply to live in, and our guest rooms. The fourth floor was the alpha's residence.

Of course, the Blackwoods themselves are in real estate, so yes, it is a very luxurious apartment, but overall, so is the pack house. We waste no expense making sure that there is a little something for everyone available, and that goes for the rest of the pack lands.

It's quiet when I step into the apartment, leading me to believe my parents are sleeping. Yes, my parents still live with me. It didn't make sense to have this place all to myself just because I was Alpha, so I asked them to stay.

I quietly make my way to my suite so that I can shower and then grab a meal. I've been incredibly pent-up. My imagination keeps trying to run away from me. I keep imagining Luca. I sigh as I remove my suit and put it in the designated area before turning the shower spray to cold. I step in and let the shock of the water cool my overheated skin.

Like most wolves, I have had my fair share of sexual experiences. Some wolves wait for their mate, though it is not a requirement. I definitely didn't. I was a very adventurous teen boy, and it's been over a decade since I was supposed to find my mate. I've never considered not having the opportunity to do something about my sexual urges. Right now, I am aware of how difficult this is going to be.

Pulling myself together, I finish my shower. I dress in soft pajama pants because who doesn't like that shit and throw on a tank top. I leave my room, realizing that the apartment is no longer quiet as I smell food and see a light down the hall. Mother was up. I calmly walked out of the hall, watching her move around the kitchen to put together my dinner.

"Mother?"

"Hey, baby boy." She said in her chipper voice. She was a tall woman, strong and lean from her life with her tribe and then running around with a pack of wolves. That's right, my mother literally goes on runs with my father and some of her friends in the pack, but she was always athletic.

"I thought you were sleeping."

"We did go to bed, but I heard you come in and wanted to check on you. How is Luca? Did he like the gift? Does he need anything else?"

"I texted Luca earlier. He was fine. He didn't share too much, but he was okay. He mentioned writing a bit. He thanked you for the gifts."

"Me? It was supposed to be from you. Oh, Eli. I'm trying to help you win your omega over." I laughed softly, settling myself at the island as she plated my food.

"I won't take credit for your hard work. I let Luca know I asked for some stuff and that you thought of all the little touches. He appreciated the book." I said before tucking into my food.

"I just want you happy, Eli." She said softly.

"I am," I responded, smiling at her.

"This situation is making you miserable. Your mate is right there after all these years, and you can't have him." I paused before responding, wanting to be as clear as possible when explaining my feelings.

"It's not that I don't have him. He's very clearly my mate, and he just needs something different from me. I just need to learn about him. He isn't going anywhere. None of this is a rejection, Mother." I explain.

"What wolf wouldn't want to move into the Alpha suite immediately? He doesn't want to tell his parents!" She countered.

"I told you-"

"Yes, I don't understand why you just won't bring him home where he belongs. He is your omega. He is your Luna. He must submit to you." She interrupted.

"I am sure that will all come in time. I assure you that I am okay with the pace, Mother. Besides, I remember growing up hearing how you did not exactly submit to the Alpha." It was only a slight exaggeration.

"But an omega shouldn't be on their own." Mother said, concern shining through. "He can't stay in that motel. There are plenty of alpha wolves in the city, Eli."

"I'll arrange a room for him in the pack house. I'll talk to him, and if that doesn't work for him, we will find something that does." She nodded before leaning into my side. Kissing my head, she wished me a good night.

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Hey, Bubbles and Butterflies,

Please drop comments to let me know what is confusing and what needs improvement.

If you have questions about asexuality, aromanticism, or mixed orientation relationships, drop a comment or find me on social media. I'll answer you back to the best of my ability. Please note that some of your questions may be answered on my socials as well. I won't use screen names if I post your question.

I will post on my Wattpad wall when the next chapter is up. It depends on the Patreon schedule, but I should be able to get chapter five on Patreon by mid-June. Wattpad gets chapters at the earliest, one week after Patreon.