Hey guys,

Here is the next chapter, you will be pleased to note that it is slightly longer than my previous ones but I had written most of it last night so I only had to read through it again to make sure it was alright to put up.

Thanks to everyone who voted and commented, I love you all. Oh, sorry for any errors but it was getting late and my wrists were killing me.

Lots of love

XXX

Chapter 13

Holly’s Pov

I never used to sleep well, always fearing that I would be violently awoken or the nightmares would cause me to wake up screaming. It was something I had gotten used to, not being able to risk closing my eyes in case horrible images flashed behind my lids when I let myself relax. Things I remembered which I wanted nothing more than to forget, it was painful for me to see them again, to re-call the unforgettable aspects of my life that my innocent-self had been forced to witness and endure as I was growing up.

Surprisingly I didn’t pity myself; I knew that somewhere out there someone must be worse off than I was. It was what kept me sane, trying desperately to look on the bright side of life even when I look back on it now and want nothing more than to cry my eyes out.

So when I didn’t normally sleep well I couldn’t help but realise as soon as I started to wake from my sleep that it was the first time in my life that I have ever slept without waking up screaming. I couldn’t help but tense, wondering if I had been drugged in my sleep only to relax my form slightly when I realised I was surrounded thickly in a scent which had my wolf purring in delight. I knew whose it was; I would be able to recognise it anywhere now. Adrian.

I still had no idea what he wanted with me, why he was wasting his time with a broken girl who had nothing to her name. Why was he even bothering with me, it was clear he could have his choice of any females considering he was the sweetest guy I had ever met, not to mention he was far from unattractive. What with his muscular form, thick black hair and soft eyes that made me want to melt. But I knew I didn’t stand a chance, I mean what would he want with a skinny and unhealthy looking girl who could probably break with the gentlest of touches. No, it was better if I didn’t get my hopes up for something which I knew would never happen; even if the thought made my wolf whine in pain.

It was another reaction I was curious of, why my wolf was acting in such an unusual way. She had always been with me over the years, talking to me to help keep me sane from the life that I was brought up in. She much like myself had never been happy though, never felt anything other than pain and shame. Now though she seemed to be alive, as if woken from a long sleep. It was when I thought of Adrian I noticed, how she would purr in comfort as if she had fallen for his wolf already. I had no idea what this meant, but I had a feeling that he most likely didn’t feel the same way. It was probably due to the fact he was the first and only person who has ever been nice to me I thought, she simply wanted the comfort she thought he could give us. Not that I blamed her, she had a right to hope after all.

Sighing softly I slowly let my eyes flutter open, not remembering where I was until I felt as if I was lying on a cloud. The soft material felt unusual but comforting against my skin, the skirt he had obviously given me leaving my legs bare and I was thankful he had spared a pair of his boxers, even if the thought of him seeing me so intimately made my flush a hundred shades of red. I didn’t know why he was still hanging around; it was clear that now he had seen all of me that I wasn’t anything special to look at. I was a broken, fragile girl who was now alone in the world completely.

That thought should have affected me really, I mean I should have felt a sense of loss over losing my family or regret for running away but I found it impossible to do so. When I thought back to how they treated me I realised that they had never actually considered me family as I had never considered them mine. A pack is there to protect each other, but they had never protected me since they were the main and only cause of the pain to begin with.

So with that I couldn’t help but frown, realising right there and then that they meant nothing to me, at all. I felt more for strangers then I did for them and while I thought myself as a positive person I realised that I didn’t just loath them, I hated them with everything in me as did my wolf. Her pack had betrayed her, abused her in ways which brought tears to my eyes; she didn’t deserve that.

Breathing in deeply I pressed my face into the plush pillow beneath me, feeling a strange sense of loss as if something was missing. The scent helped I realised, but I couldn’t help but take note of how my wolf seemed to crave more. More of what exactly I didn’t know, but whatever it was she seemed to have become addicted to it instantly. Whether that was a good thing or a bad thing I will never know, but I’m holding out that it’s positive.

Really I knew that I shouldn’t be letting my guard down so easily, I mean anything could happen but I found my wolf to at ease here to find myself worked up like I would have expected. I felt almost comforted here; a feeling which was while new to me was one that I found myself liking. I wasn’t foolish enough to try and get used to it, but I was grateful enough for the feeling to soak up as much as I  could get before Adrian grew bored with me and threw me aside like I expected; my wolf cried out at the thought but I knew it was inevitable.

Sighing I slowly, cautiously pushed myself up from the bed as I kept the sheets around me as if they could protect me. I didn’t know what to expect, but I needed the bathroom badly and had no idea where it was. I was surprised that I hadn’t needed it before, but then again I hadn’t eaten much for days or drunken anything so it didn’t shock me as much as it would others. I was used to it after all, unfortunately.

Letting my eyes scan the room I couldn’t help but stiffen as I saw the back of someone’s head as I looked towards the black sofa which sat at the edge of the room, it was directed towards a large open window and I could only imagine how beautiful the sight must be but I couldn’t see from the angle I was at. What I did know though was who it was, Adrian.

Strangely I found I didn’t mind it, my frown deepening when I realised that I actually liked him being here, as if his presence brought me comfort which I couldn’t understand. I tried to shake it off but before I knew what I was doing I was gently moving myself to the edge of the bed, throwing my legs gently over the side before I froze. What was I doing? Would he mind?

Shaking my head softly, my curls knotted horribly I quietly lowered my feet to the ground. I wasn’t prepared for the soft carpet underneath my feet that was for sure, it was nice. It was thick and felt like heaven against my toes, my battered and bruised body appreciating the softness of it as I couldn’t help but let a ghost of a smile grace my lips as I gently walked over to the couch on the opposite side of the room, my eyes still tired with sleep as I found myself walking as quietly as I could before I could even think of stopping myself.

Reaching him I couldn’t help but stare as I stood in front of him, my eyes taking in how unguarded he seemed in his sleep as his large muscular form seemed to be crammed uncomfortably on the couch. I didn’t know why he let me have his bed for the night when he clearly needed it, I wouldn’t have minded sleeping on the sofa since it would have been a luxury compared to the blanket I had at home. I wanted to scoff at the thought, that place was never my home.

I suddenly found myself having to fight the urge to run my fingers through his hair, taking note that while I had thought it was pitch black before it was actually a very dark brown. I couldn’t help but let my gaze soften as I simply stood in front of him, letting my eyes take in the pair of silk pyjama bottoms he had on and a shirt. Why did being near him seem to bring me so much comfort? It was as if just being around him gave me a purpose for life, made my wolf purr in delight and I found myself wanting to know what was bringing it all on. Did he feel the same or was he disgusted in me? The thought that he was, pained me more than I would have liked to admit.

Not daring to even sigh I quickly looked around the room only to spot a bathroom attached to the far side, my feet still quietly heading in that direction as I kept looking over my shoulder as if I was waiting for him to snap at me for making too much noise. I couldn’t bare the thought of taking the time to escape from here, knowing that my wolf wouldn’t be able to take it. I didn’t want to put her through that, I would stay to please her since it was at least what she deserved after staying with me for all those years.

After I had finished I winced as I flushed the chain, hoping to god that it didn’t wake him as I tip-toed back into his large room before sighing out in relief when I saw that he hadn’t moved. I didn’t know what was wrong with me but I knew it had to be something serious to be causing me to act in such a way; the scary thing was that I didn’t mind. The comfort I felt, the brief moments when I felt myself starting to smile seemed to be worth the fear that he would soon get bored and toss me aside; hopefully when that time happens he would kill me, I knew neither me nor my wolf could take another rejection and the last thing I feared was death.

So with that on my mind I couldn’t help myself as I walked back in front of him, drying my still slightly damp hands on the shirt I was wearing as I found myself nervously staring at him again. I couldn’t help but fidget from where I stood making me thankful for his thick carpet, though why I was so nervous was beyond me.

Slowly I approached his sleeping form, his breathing even and I wondered why he hadn’t woken up yet. Even though it pained me to even think it I couldn’t help but realise how easy it would be so end his life, I would never do it but why was he putting so much trust into me? Not to mention why was he sleeping on the couch when he could have just kicked me out of his bed?

What I did next I couldn’t help but feel was stupid of me, my thin hand reaching out towards him slowly. I didn’t know why I had the sudden urge to touch him, to feel his skin on mine but as I reached out to try and satisfy my wolf I couldn’t help but scream in fright when suddenly a hand was wrapped around my wrist in a tight grasp. Pain rocketed through my arm starting from my wrist due to my bones still being fragile, my form collapsing onto my knees in seconds as I tried desperately to pull away from whoever held me in my grasp.

“Shit, oh god I am so sorry sweetheart” was all I heard a pained voice say before the pressure on my wrist was instantly gone, all of this happening in less than a minute as I found myself backing up as fast as I could as I tried to ignore the slight throbbing which was now directed at my wrist.

Looking up through my messy locks I flinched when I saw how close Adrian was, pure pain in his eyes causing my wolf to howl in displeasure at seeing such a look on him. My breathing was harsh and sharp as I felt my back hit the wall, thankful that he stayed put and didn’t try and approach like I knew he wanted to. While I was pleased he was keeping his distance my wolf wasn’t, but I couldn’t help but feel myself growing more and more agitated as he continued to stare at me with that same pained expression on his face.

“It’s fine, I shouldn’t have urm…it won’t happen again” I whispered as I looked away, gently holding my wrist in my other hand as I did so. His grip hadn’t been what most would have considered tight, but due to me not being as healthy as most it felt as if he had tried to break my bones as he did so. I couldn’t help but swallow back a sob as I curled up against the wall, why did the thought of not touching him again hurt so much?

“No, no sweetheart you did nothing wrong I just….” He seemed to trail off frustrated, my knees pulled up to my chest as I couldn’t help but stare at him. I knew I shouldn’t get so attached, but I also knew that my wolf was far too smitten with him to even try and think of running away. She deserved some happiness, even if it meant I would have to put up with these strange feeling which I seemed to be having around him.

I didn’t interrupt him as he seemed to continue to stare at me pleadingly, a few moments later my eyes watched his form as he seemed to sit on the floor in front of me, crossing his legs as he kept a safe distance away which I was thankful for. Even though my wolf was trying to tell me that he didn’t want to bring any harm to me; I didn’t trust easily with good reason.

“Can I at least know your name?” he asked me after a few minutes of complete silence, both of us just staring at each other as I soon found myself relaxing when I realised he wasn’t going to approach me all of a sudden. I was foolish when I had tried to touch him; a mistake which I didn’t want to make again so soon.

It was the pleading in his tone which made me cave, the fact that an vicious and well-known alpha was sitting in front of me pleading to know my name was surreal enough for me to find myself speaking before I could stop myself.

“Holly” I whispered gently, but I knew he would have heard me as clear as day as his whole face seemed to brighten up with the new knowledge he had on me. I couldn’t help but smile softly, pressing my face against my knees in an attempt to hide my reaction but I knew he had seen it anyway. Why else would his smile turn into a full out grin?

“Holly” he seemed to say to himself, the spark in his eye making my wolf purr and my form to relax almost completely. Why did he seem to have such an effect on me?

Even though I knew it wasn’t a question I nodded gently anyway, pressing my lips against my bare knees as my bare toes curled into the soft carpet seeking the soothing sensation I had found previously. It was nice I found, being on the receiving end of such a soft gaze.

“Such a pretty name” he muttered causing me to blush. I knew that he was only saying that, that it wasn’t true but still it was nice to pretend that I know someone that wasn’t completely disgusted when looking at me.

We again seemed to lapse into silence, neither of us saying a word as we continued to stare at each other. It wasn’t until my stomach rumbled that I found myself wincing slightly at the loud noise, ignoring it with ease like I had done over the years as the un-comfort I felt  with the feeling of being hungry was one I was all too familiar with.

I flinched slightly when Adrian jumped to his feet, his face giving me an apologetic look as he took in my startled reaction to him. I couldn’t help but shrug gently, it wasn’t like it was his fault that I was as jumpy as I was. I was brought up with having to flinch away from hits and beatings so now it was simply a instinctual reaction, even if I wished it wasn’t due to the pain and regret it brought to his eyes.

“You hungry? Breakfast?” he asked quickly, the regret still in his eyes making me frown. I didn’t like the fact he seemed to be regretting something that wasn’t even his fault, it made my face fall and my wolf to howl in displeasure and pain. So to please him I gently nodded, watching his face light up making it seem worth it somehow.

It didn’t take him long to get back, carrying what looked like a tray with more heavenly food placed on it. I knew he must have rushed since food took time to prepare and he was barely gone minutes before returning, making me think that he might have just grabbed whatever was out. I didn’t mind, knowing it would be a struggle for me to eat a few bites since the last thing I wanted was to bring it back up again.

“Here” he smiled as he slowly returned to his sitting position, putting the tray on the floor but I didn’t look at it. No, my gaze stayed on those hazel eyes of his which looked so much like my own, as if we were made for each other. I knew it was impossible though, he deserved so much better.

Seeing him give me a reassuring look I slowly looked down towards the tray, seeing two plates of what looked like French toast and fried tomatoes on it. I strangely found I missed cooking I realised, I think the only reason I had resented it beforehand was the simple fact that I was constantly cooking food that I was never allowed to even try, let alone eat.

“Thank you” I whispered, my eyes never leaving his hands as he unhurriedly reached for a plate before making a move to approach me. His eyes locked with mine as he gave me a hopeful gaze, as if he was asking me for my permission to approach the few steps which separated us. While my wolf thought this was unnecessary I couldn’t help but be thankful for his caring nature, even though he was one of the last people I would expect it from.

“You have absolutely nothing to be thankful for sweetheart” he said softly, cautiously approaching me but other than tense my form slightly I didn’t comment or move, watching him with keen eyes as he moved to sit in front of me instead of moving back like I expected him to.

But I did, I had so much to thank him for since I knew that I could die happy right now, knowing that at least one person would care that I was gone.

(So what do you think? I tried to make it longer for you guys and sorry about the really late posting but I got it up in the end!)