---- [T -> J] ----

T: self care is coming face to face with a ghost and setting out on a quest to capture what you once saw onto video with no big camera crews following you around joined only by your fellow investigator nick groff and your equipment tech aaron goodwin as you travel to some of the most highly active paranormal locations where you spend an entire night being locked down from dusk till dawn

----

J: Why are you laughing to yourself in the dark
T: did you know
T: Light's last name
T: Backwards
T: Is im a gay
J: I am so tried

----

T: God, I cant believe you said that to my father
J: I panicked
T: So you replied to "Jason, what are you interests?" with "your son in my room"?!
J: I made a smooth recovery!
T: "What?" "The sun and the moon, astronomy," is not a smooth recovery!

---- [The Schuyler Sisters] ----

J: thank fucking god
D: Jaybird!
T: no I agree thank fucking god

----

T: It's 2am, where were you?
J: With Dickie?
D: You wanna try again?
J: With Roy?

----

J: What do you fucks want for dinner this time
T: swaghetti
D: and memeballs

---- [All the single ladies] ----

D: Guys guess what!
W: Your gay?
R: You died?
T: Your gonna bring me a coffee?
D: Yes, no, and for a price
D: Jay saw a frog :)

----

J: Of course I'm functional no way would I be a disaster
T: Yeah u fucking fools I'm the disaster

----

T: 💅🏻💃🏻🌃🥂🥴✨
J: wh
J: who authorized that
J: who thought it was a good idea to give you those
W: *sweats*
J: I should have known but now I have to murder you

---- [T -> J] ----

J: Thats right, I got two extras hearts and a wooden sword, what the fuck are you gonna do, God?

----

T: Y/N, eldest child in the orphanage, did not wake up, throw her brown hair into a messy bun, put on a P!ATD shirt, skinny jeans and checkered vans walk down stairs to her alcoholic owner lady and be told her new owner, Brendon Urie is waiting in the other room; for THIS

----

J: How about them apples?
T: How about them apples?
J: No you said you were- you have to eat it- you have to- you can't just make the joke and starve

----

T: we have a problem
J: Would shooting you solve it? No? Then get out

----

J: If you rob a bank you don't have to worry about paying bills, food, or rent for the next ten years no matter what

----

T: ever wonder how many strangers you have
seen on the last day of their lives

----

J: RIP to the second law of thermodynamics but I'm different

----

T: You ever kill a bug and then stay up for three days wondering if their bug mama is sitting up waiting for them to come home only they dead?

----

J: Do I want to ask why you're pulling around a wagon with a coffee maker on it?
T: Bruce said I didn't need one in every room in the manor so I made it portable

----

T: I thought we agreed, no guns!
J: is that what we agreed? I thought we said no gum
T: but you're also chewing gum
J: I'm a wild card

----

J: We won't lose because with have this
T: heart?
J: Heart? No, me. I'm point at myself. I'm going to win this for us.

----

T: I was going through my old phone from like three years ago and there was only one thing in the notes app and it just said
T: "I'm just TIRED. Torn apart, Insecure, Really faking my smile, Extremely sad, Duck walked up to a lemonade stand / and he said to the man, running the stand / "hey!-" (bum bum bum) "-got any grapes?"

----

J: Where did you get tomato soup?
T: it's actually a bowl of ketchup I microwaved

----

T: School? (Scoffs) Not today

----

J: I try not to worry about things I can't control or kill
T: really? that's all I do

----

T: I think I've moved beyond stress into something more deeply disturbing

----

J: Trust me, I know what I'm doing
T: Jay, not even God knows what ur doing

----

T: Got called gay in the Batburger the other day
J: Fine, I'll ask. What happened?
T: got called gay in the Batburger
J: yeah, but why?
T: I was being gay
J: In the Batburger?
T: yeah, it was in the Batburger

----

J: were you dropped as a child?!
T: Bold of you to assume I was held

---- [The Schuyler Sisters] ----

J: I wonder how tall it is
T: 300 meters, probably
D: Actually it's 259,08 meters
J: No???
D: Google it
T:...
T: Why do you know that
D: idk im god

----

T: lets abolish all clocks, the concept of time itself. let's live by sunlight. primal instinct and internal clocks only
J: When is the next bus getting here? It's a surprise :)
T: thats no different from how busses work now (:
D: the opposite facing smiley faces is a rly specific energy that I don't know how to describe

----

J: Superbat
D: Blark
T: went

---- [T -> J] ----

T: Mayhaps I TWIMST aroumd and take an peep for mineself

----

J: the suns almost perfect lighting... I should do some push-ups
T: why yes, yes you should

----

T: if u water a tree with apple juice is it forced cannibalism
J: die

---- [J -> W] ----

J: I need your help
W: Ah, finally someone who appreciates the Wallster. What do you need, young grasshopper?
J: If I didn't need you, I would kill you
J: But, I need to know how you got Dickiebird when he's so far out of your league he's practically in a different universe
W: First of all, rude
W: second of all, just because I'm dating Dickie doesn't mean I know how I did it
W: But I think bringing him cereal thousands of times worked
J: Can I substitute coffee for cereal?
W: I guess?
J: Great, I knew bribery would be the way to go

---- [T -> D] ----

T: Dickie
D: new chat, who dis
T: Dickie pls
T: I am in grave need of assistance
D: Normally I charge $50 but since I know what this is about, I'll make this one on the house. Go on, young grasshopper
T: How did you get it through Wally's thick fucking skull that you liked him
D: I hit him over the head a lot, and let him bring me cereal
D: Kissing him probably helped too but Idk
T: got it- violence and extortion. That's what I figured

----