Johnlock Texts Part 5

[Tues 29 Apr, 09:21]

I woke up with Gracie in my bed -JW

Lilly was in mine -SH

They know -JW

I'm sure the whole street knows with the way we were shouting -SH

I'm sorry -JW

No, I am. -SH

Don't. All you did was stand and defend yourself while I shouted some rather colourful thoughts -JW

I'm not going to try and argue to that because that's true. I still over reacted and shouldn't have brought up the whole nearly dying thing -SH

No, there were things left unsaid before. -JW

Not unsaid. You're just too stubborn  to accept the facts -SH

Maybe -JW

Definitely -SH

Alright, alright. I get the point I overreact a lot -JW

Understatement of the century -SH

Shut up, you big drama queen -JW

How dare you! I am not a drama queen! -SH

"Oh John, stop acting like I just kicked your new born puppy, threw it in a bag and drown the yappy thing" -JW

You are too! "Sherlock, for God's sake, Lilly does a better job of acting like a grown up and she's not even a month old. You're so childish" -SH

Oh God, we sound like idiots -JW

I'm a genius, not an idiot. Can't say the same for you though, love -SH

You're not the only one who can take sex away.. -JW

That's an empty threat and we both know it -SH

Yeah, yeah. Shut up -JW

Where are you anyway? -JW

Guess the Death. -SH

You realise Charlotte never came round yesterday? -SH

I forgot about her coming round.. I hope she didn't turn up and hear us shouting -JW

Mm. Right, got to go. My turn -SH

-

[Tues 29 Apr, 21:33]

Are you still at Bards?! -JW

Yes -SH

Should I be worried? -JW

Oh, yes. Molly and I are secretly having an affair and telling our partners we're playing with dead bodies. -SH

Lot of bodies today, then? -JW

Mm. And Molly wanted to vent for while. -SH

So you both guessed and planned the deaths -JW

I may have pointed out an easy way for her to bump off Matthew, should she waned to. -SH

... -JW

Mental exercise -SH

You.. plan people's death's as a mental exercise? -JW

Often. Even my mind palace gets boring sometimes, so I entertain myself -SH

How would you kill me then? -JW

Poison -SH

You eat a lot. Put some in your food, simple -SH

For a moment, I thought you were going to say 'oh John, I'd never kill you because I love you so much' -JW

Nope. Poison. -SH

How would you kill Molly? -JW

Chemicals in the lab. Easy to hide as an accident -SH

Lestrade? -JW

Holmes-Lestrade now. I'd just straight out shot him and then walk away. I'd have to kill my brother after that though. -SH

Okay, what about your brother? How would you bump him off? -JW

I'd strangle him, just for the pleasure of knowing I killed him with my base hands -SH

..I'm glad you're not a criminal -JW

The whole of England should be glad I'm not a criminal -SH

True -JW

What time are you home then? -JW

I might stay here for the night, if that's okay. It's Molly's turn to need a friend -SH

Is she okay? -JW

[Delayed] Mostly -SH

Oh. Okay then. I'll see you tomorrow -JW

-

[Wed 30 Apr, 08:10]

How do you feel about losing me for the weekend? -SH

Good morning to you too. Depends on the reason I'm losing you -JW

Girls weekend with Molly, Charlotte and Tammy -SH

I don't need to point out you're not a girl, do I? And who's Tammy? -JW

No you don't. Tammy is Charlotte's friend but I'm sure by the end of this weekend they will be snogging -SH

Okay then. You know you don't need to ask for my permission to do something? -JW

I know that but I thought you'd appreciate me asking -SH

You were going to go even if I said no, weren't you? -JW

Of course, but we can pretend that I would consider your opinion, can't we? -SH

We can. So where are you girls off to? -JW

You know very well I'm not a girl. And Tammy has a cabin a few hours away in secluded area -SH

Sounds like a horror movie in the making -JW

You'll be killed off first -JW

Why's that? -SH

The sex mad one, otherwise known as the 'pretty slut', is always first to go. She's usually dumb and blonde too, but let's not stereo type -JW

'Oh my God! You think I'm pretty?!' -SH

Yup, those ones. You are so getting killed first -JW

Do you think I'd look good blonde? I think I could pull it off -SH

Don't you dare change your hair! I love your hair. -JW

Okay, John. -SH

Wait, where did you sleep last night? -JW

Molly and I stayed up all night but she fell asleep just before I text. -SH

Where is she sleeping? -JW

Currently on my shoulder. I'd move her, but there's no where in the lab -SH

A year ago, she'd have been over the moon -JW

She can't bare the thought now. Not since I've come out and she's met Matthew. They're perfect for each other -SH

As are we -JW

Right? -JW

Of course, Mr. I'm-not-gay Watson -SH

Oh, shut up. I'm not gay -JW

You're not straight and that was what that statement was constantly implying -SH

No, it was implying I'm not gay -JW

Okay, fair enough -SH

How come you lot are going away then? I'd say to escape your boyfriends but seeing as Charlotte and Tammy don't have them, I'm stumped -JW

Molly suggested it last night and we all agreed. If Molly wasn't straight it'd be a big gay weekend rather then a girls weekend -SH

Very funny -JW

I am, aren't I? -SH

Whatever. I'll see you later, Lilly is licking at me because she has no food. I'm going shopping. -JW

I'll cook tonight -SH

As long as you don't poison it -JW

'Oh John, I'd never kill you because I love you so much' -SH

Haha. -JW

I should be a consulting comedian -SH

Just.. No. -JW

Bad joke? -SH

Very bad joke -JW

[Delayed] Molly's up. Talk later! -SH

Jesus, you're excitable for 8am -JW

-

[Wed 30 Apr, 12:34]

I'm home. Where are you? -SH

Out with Greg -JW

Why? -SH

Mycroft is being a pain, apparently -JW

Do you go to Greg when I'm being 'a pain'? -SH

Yes -JW

What is there to complain about? I'm a lovely boyfriend -SH

You are. But you can be an annoying person sometimes -JW

Wow. Maybe we should be a stand up couple -SH

When did you get so sarcastic? -JW

You must've rubbed off on me -SH

Heh -JW

Yeah, I'm the pervert -SH

Must've rubbed off on me -JW

Maybe I will poison your dinner... -SH

Haha. I'll be home soon -JW

Good -SH

-

[Thurs 01 May, 10:11]

Let's talk about sex, baby -SH

This again? -JW

Wrong reply -SH

-

[Thurs 01 May, 11:10]

Let's talk about sex, baby -JW

Nice try. But nope, you don't get the answer that easily -SH

Damn it. Git -JW

Love you too -SH

-

[Thurs 01 May, 17:54]

Got everything on the list, are you sure there's nothing else? -JW

More grapes? -SH

You have five packets! You're only going for a weekend -JW

Just one more? -SH

Fine -JW

Anything else you need? -JW

I don't think so. We're mainly just going to be sitting around and talking -SH

You big girl -JW

Big, yes. Girl, no -SH

... -JW

You know it's true -SH

Maybe -JW

Maybe? -SH

Fine, yes. -JW

Better -SH

-

[Fri 02 May, 09:22]

You're leaving soon, where are you? -JW

Hello? -JW

I'd like to see you for a few hours before you leave -JW

Ten minutes -SH

Where are you? -JW

On a set stairs -SH

Fine. What are/were you doing? -JW

Talking to Matthew -SH

Why? -JW

I told him off for upsetting Molly -SH

I thought you thought she was overreacting -JW

Mm. -SH

There's more that you haven't told me? -JW

Yes -SH

Okay -JW

Molly just has a few sensitive subjects that Matthew wasn't previously aware of -SH

I gave him a list -SH

She has a list? -JW

Only five main points -SH

I just like lists -SH

What's the longest list you've had? -JW

One about you -SH

How many points? -JW

Over 300 -SH

What is it a list of? -JW

Things I love about you -SH

That's really really sweet Sherlock -JW

I know -SH

What's the first thing you wrote? Point 1? -JW

1: His height -SH

Really? -JW

Really -SH

When did you start the list? -JW

A year or so after we met. I officially and consciously started in a few days after we got together -SH

I'm confused. You subconsciously made a list? -JW

Yes -SH

I'd like to hear some of it sometime -JW

Hmm.. Maybe -SH

-

[Fri 02 May, 23:59]

2: His laugh -SH

3: The way he smiles at me -SH

Adorable -JW

4: The way my hand covers his -SH

Stop it. You've been gone hours and I already miss you. This isn't helping! -JW

Goodnight, John -SH

Love you -JW

Love you too -SH

-

[Sat 03 May, 12:32]

5: His eyes and the way they follow me -SH

I didn't think you noticed -JW

Of course, I did.

Why wasn't that signed? -JW

Hello? -JW

Sorry, John! Sherlock's phone is being confiscated for the next 72 two hours! -M

Okay, you girls have fun -JW

We will! -M

-

[Mon 05 May, 14:54]

John, my head hurts. Make it stop -SH

I've missed you too -JW

Jooohn! My head hurts. You're a doctor, help. -SH

What did you do? -JW

We drank. A lot. -SH

Jesus. What? -JW

Vodka. So much vodka. I feel sick -SH

You're hungover? Oh my God, this is priceless -JW

I don't even remember much past going into the woods -SH

You went into the woods? -JW

Yes. Tammy said there were fairies. I told her they weren't real so we went to check. I was right -SH

Sounds like you had a fun weekend -JW

I did but God, my head.. -SH

Serves you right for drinking so much -JW

Hey! You're meant to feel bad and offer to be my personal nurse -SH

If you're good and don't bite me this time, maybe. -JW

When are you home? -JW

As soon as we clean up and pack the car up -SH

How long will that take? -JW

Few hours. Then the drive is a few hours. Could be late -SH

Okay then. I'll leave you to tidy. -JW

-

[Mon 05 May, 18:03]

Half way home now -SH

What time do you reckon you'll be back? -JW

Half seven, eight at the latest -SH

Alright. Did Charlotte and Tammy get together then? -JW

They did... -SH

Why the ... ? -JW

I walked in on them to ask why there was a tie on the doorknob. They were kissing with few clothes on -SH

Oh, Sherlock.. -JW

I now know what the tie means -SH

[Delayed] I'm sorry, but that is really really funny! -JW

Shut up. -SH

And don't say you're not talking! -SH

Ugh. Fine. -JW

What have you been doing without me? -SH

Not much. It's been boring. I did a bit of job hunting, but its hard to get decent pay and short hours -JW

You don't need to work. I want to look after you -SH

No. I don't care how much money you have, I will provide for us too -JW

If you didn't have a job we'd get to spend more time together -SH

We've had this conversation, I need a job -JW

You only 'need' it to make you feel manly -SH

That's not the point. I can't tell you pay for everything. -JW

That's part of the point. What about when we get married? Will you let me pay for everything then? -SH

No, not even then. You work, why can't I? -JW

My work involves you, that's different -SH

If I asked you to quit, would you? -JW

That's hardly a fair question when our reasons for working are so drastically different. -SH

It's the same concept. Imagine it reserved. If I had all the money and asked you to quit your job, would you? -JW

No, because I know that if I don't work I turn to drugs -SH

Okay, okay, bad example but the point stands. I won't let you look after me completely. You don't need to spend all your money on me. I don't want you to do that -JW

I want you with me, though -SH

Sherlock, we both know this is just you being a possessive jealous idiot -JW

Fine. You win. I have a job in mind though, higher pay and less hours then your current job -SH

I'm not working for your brother -JW

God no, I wouldn't put you through that -SH

What is it then? -JW

Same as your previous job just at the clinic closer to home -SH

They didn't want to employ me before -JW

I went inside to ask and it turns out I helped the new boss a few years back. He was more then happy to employ my boyfriend -SH

When did this happen? -JW

About a day after we had the conversation. I knew you'd want to look by yourself for a while though -SH

That sounds good actually. The job, I mean -JW

Frank's number is on my desk. Under 'Doctor Smith' -SH

I'll give him a call. See you when you get in -JW

Love you -SH

Love you too -JW

-

[Wed 07 May, 12:00]

Let's talk about sex, baby -SH

Let's talk about the state of the kitchen -JW

So close, John, so close -SH

What? -JW

You nearly got the answer -SH

Did I? Damn. -JW

I mean it though, I'm not cleaning this up -JW

It was Lilly! -SH

Sherlock! Stop blaming the kitten!-JW

Fineeeee -SH

-

[Fri 09 May, 13:45]

Do you know what tomorrow is?! -JW

Saturday? -SH

[Delayed] Yeah, it's Saturday.. -JW

I know that. We do own a calendar -SH

-

[Fri 09 May, 19:37]

Everything sorted? -M

Except John. He'll be moping, because he thinks I forgot, how do we get him out the flat? -SH

Leave it to me, I have a plan -M

You are a life saver, Molly Hooper -SH

Literally ;) -M

Oh, definitely. -SH

[Five minutes later] How's things with Matthew? -SH

Much better. We had a long talk about.. everything. -M

Everything? -SH

Everything. -M

Good -SH

-

[Sat 10 May, 10:30]

Not sure where you are but I'm off to Molly's for a bit, she's recently got the DVD's I've been searching for in the shops. I'll be back at around five. -JW

I'm at Mycroft's. See you later -SH

-

[Sun 11 May, 17:54]

Where's my red jumper gone? -JW

It's on your bedroom floor from the last time we were in there -SH

Right, of course. -JW

The new jumper looks great on you by the way -SH

I was hesitant when you handed me it and I could feel it was clothes. All I could think of was the tight suit you made me wear to the wedding -JW

I could tell -SH

I'm sorry I thought you'd forgot -JW

Stop apologising! It's something I'd do and we both know it -SH

While it was fun, can we spend your birthday as just us? -JW

Definitely. I'm not a party person -SH

'Had a thing' -JW

Mm. You're lucky I didn't pull that one this time -SH

You organised it..? -JW

Shh -SH

You're adorable -JW

I prefer when you call me sexy -SH

I know, but you are adorable!  -JW

[Delayed] Okay -SH

Okay? -JW

Okay. -SH

What have you done? -JW

Nothing! I just had to help Lilly get off the sofa -SH

I know for a fact she can get off by herself -JW

Oops -SH

What were you doing? -JW

I made tea -SH

Stop lying -JW

You'll see when you get home ;) -SH

Another emoticon? -JW

I like them, plus Molly uses them so often that I find myself using them -SH

I can imagine you walking around, with some crazy hair style or clothes, and saying "All the girls are doing it!" -JW

I am not a sheep! -SH

You're the leader of the pack? -JW

Exactly -SH

Wait, no! There's no pack! -SH

You could have fooled me with all the hugging and Tammy almost bursting into tears at the fact you had to leave them -JW

We're just close! Plus, I see the girls all the time at the lab -SH

"The girls" Half way there -JW

Oh, shut it! -SH

Just don't form a cult -JW

Maybe I should tell Frank that you're quitting to be a comedian -SH

I couldn't do it. You'd get too jealous of all the fangirls -JW

Probably -SH

-

[Mon 12 May, 03:45]

Where the hell are you? I woke up and you were gone -JW

At the lab -SH

Why? -JW

Is Molly okay? -JW

Molly is sound asleep at her house -SH

Why are you at the lab then? At this time? Do you have a case? -JW

Bored -SH

Really? -JW

Really. -SH

Come home -JW

No, I'm bored! -SH

I'm sure I can find a way to entertain you -JW

Ten minutes -SH

-

[Mon 12 May, 12:44]

6: The sound of his heartbeat when I rest my head on his chest -SH

7: The fact he calls me things like 'brilliant' and 'fantastic' -SH

8: His jumpers -SH

God, I love you. -JW

I know -SH

-

[Thurs 15 May, 19:23]

Let's talk about sex, baby -SH

Give me a clue. -JW

The next line starts with the same first three words as my line -SH

'Let's talk about'... -JW

Mm. -SH

Let's talk about you, baby -JW

Nope. Close -SH

Let's talk about me, baby -JW

So close it's almost painful -SH

Let's talk about us, baby -JW

You will kick yourself when you get it -SH

If I bloody get it -JW

Let's talk about the bedroom -JW

Closer before -SH

Ugh! -JW

-

[Fri 16 May, 06:55]

[Attempts to call John]

[Call missed]

John! Get up, we have a serial killer! -SH

[Twenty minutes later] Lazy git, GET UP! -SH

Mm. Your loss. -SH

-

[Fri 16 May, 07:19]

I'm up, I'm up. -JW

I'm in Scotland -SH

Scotland yard or...? -JW

Actual Scotland. Get a plane here, it's quickest -SH

Mycroft should have arranged it for you -SH

Right.. What the case about and why are you in Scotland? -JW

Client text, got the number from MY website, and explained about all these weird killings and how she thought that this mysterious ginger kitten was a link. She provided evidence and the cat was proven to have been at every killing/crime scene -SH

They were killed by a cat? -JW

No, but the cat is something to do with it. Likely a pet of the killer -SH

Right. See you in a few hours -JW

-

[Fri 16 May, 18:32]

Would you like to stay up here for the weekend? Even if we finish the case by tonight -SH

Yeah, that sounds nice. This town is lovely, if you forget the brutal murders -JW

Great because I already booked the hotel till Monday -SH

You know me so well. How's things going? Closer to the killer? -JW

There's a few bits of evidence that's turned up. How you getting on with the victim's family? -SH

Just been to see the third victim's sister. Lot's of tears, little information. I had tea with her and talked for a bit-JW

You waste time that way -SH

I can't just get up and leave a crying woman -JW

I would -SH

I know you would -JW

Alright then. I'll see you later. Hotel's address here [Address attached] -SH

See you -JW

-

[Fri 16 May, 22:12]

The baker -JW

Hm? -SH

It was the baker, the fat jolly man that gave us carrot cake when we spoke to him -JW

How'd you know? -SH

He just tried to kill me. -JW

You okay? Injuries? -SH

Small cut on my hand, stings a bit. That's all. I'm fine. The baker probably needs stitches though, I had to bash him on the head. He's alive, he'll be unconscious for a good while though -JW

You're amazing -SH

For solving the case? -JW

No, you're just so calm about these things -SH

So are you, so is Greg-JW

I'm a Sociopath and it's Lestrade's job -SH

*Holmes-Lestrade -SH

I was in the military, it's not like I'm sensitive towards violence -JW

9: His bravery -SH

A side note to that one is about all the times you've saved my life -SH

That'll be one hell of a side note -JW

It is -SH

I'm on my way back to the bakery now -SH

I'm not going anywhere -JW

-

[Mon 19 May, 14:14]

John, can you come home? -SH

I'll be five minutes, I've got out of work and am just paying for the shopping -JW

Okay -SH

What's wrong? -JW

She's dead.. -SH

Who? -JW

Sherlock?! -JW

It's my fault.. -SH

Sherlock, who's dead? -SH

Gracie. It's all my fault -SH

What happened? -JW

She exploded because of her being an experiment -SH

Shit.. -JW

Are you okay? -JW

Fine -SH

Sherlock... -JW

You told me about redbeard, remember? -JW

This is different! -SH

Sherlock, don't push me out. We both know you loved her -JW

[Delayed] Just hurry up and get home -SH

-

[Mon 19 May, 15:39]

Tea? -JW

Please -SH

Then can you come lay with me? -SH

Of course I will, love -JW

-

[Tues 20 May, 21:32]

I miss her -SH

I know, I do too -JW

We should get rid of her cage.. -SH

It's for the best -JW

Come back to my room -SH

Are you sure? -JW

Yes, I didn't mean to shout. I'm just not used to this grieving thing. I've never hurt so much in this way since Redbeard.. -SH

If you want to be alone, it's fine -JW

No, I need you -SH

-

[Sun 25 May, 12:00]

Where are you? -JW

Out -SH

Out where? -JW

Just out -SH

Guess The Death? -JW

Will you just back off?! Stop being so clingy! -SH

[Delayed] Jeez. Okay, I'm sorry. -JW

Whatever -SH

-

[Sun 25 May, 18:59]

What's with all the boxes? -JW

Do NOT touch them! -SH

I'm not. -JW

What are they? -JW

They're for a project -SH

The project for us? -JW

No, a project for me -SH

-

[Sun 25 May, 20:43]

I want you to sleep in your room tonight -SH

Um.. Okay -JW

Good -SH

Is this about me being clingy? -JW

Yes, I need space -SH

So leave me alone -SH

Okay.. -JW

-

[Sun 25 May, 21:29]

Night. Love you -JW

I know -SH

-

[Mon 26 May, 21:58]

Coming home tonight? -JW

No, I'm staying with Tom -SH

Tom? -JW

Old friend -SH

Alright. See you tomorrow -JW

Maybe -SH

-

[Wed 28 May, 09:23]

Sherlock, why are you being like this? -JW

Like what? -SH

Closed off, silent and wandering off whenever -JW

Pushing me away -JW

Didn't realise I was, sorry -SH

You haven't even touched me since Sunday. No kisses, no hugs, not even holding my hand -JW

Didn't feel like it -SH

Tell me what's wrong, please -JW

Nothing is wrong -SH

Is this about Gracie? -JW

No. -SH

Is it something to do with Tom? -JW

No. -SH

Me? -JW

John, I have a life. You don't need to be in every part of it. Just leave me alone! -SH

Fine. -JW

-

[Thurs 29 May, 11:57]

Sherlock Holmes, stop being a pratt and talk to your boyfriend! -M

Piss off, Molly -SH

What the hell has gotten into you?! -M

-

[Fri 30 May, 11:32]

Sherlock, where are you? -JW

Hello? -JW

Sherlock! Answer. -JW

I don't care if it's 'clingy' I want to know where you are! -JW

[Attempts to call Sherlock]

[User busy]

-

[Fri 30 May, 15:01]

[Attempts to call Sherlock]

[User busy]

[Attempts to call Sherlock]

[User busy]

-

[Fri 30 May, 17:32]

Have you seen Sherlock? -JW

No, sorry. -M

I haven't seen him since lunch time yesterday.. Text me if you see him -JW

Will do! -M

-

[Sun 01 Jun, 00:00]

Say bye bye to your dear Sherlock while you have the chance! Oh, wait.. You can't! Because I've killed him! -FG