"you should get going soon." sherlock said softly into the head of blond hair.

john sighed and sat up, looking down at sherlock. "when will she be gone again?" he asked.

sherlock shrugged and rubbed john's back. "the wedding is next month, so she'll be here more often."

"so we won't be together until the stag night?" he asked and looked into his lap.

sherlock sat up and kissed the nape of john's neck. "i'm sorry, love." he said sadly. "i wish it didn't have to be like this."

"oh i'm sure." john said sarcastically then stood from bed. he went around the room, picking up his articles of clothing and putting them on as sherlock watched.

"you know i have to do this, john." sherlock said.

"you don't have to do anything. you can just leave her." john said and sat on the edge of the bed, putting on his shoes.

"we've been over this."

"oh, right." john said and stood up. "your parents are still the old fashion couple that choose the bride for their son, and their entire life choices. i'm sorry, i forgot." he said and grabbed his coat off the chair before walking out of the bedroom. as he was walking to the front door, janine walked through, smiling at her fiancee's best friend.

"hey, john," she smiled. "where's sherly?" she asked.

john forced a smile back. he hated when she called sherlock those rediculous names. "in his study, we were talking over plans for the stag night."

with that, sherlock came down the steps, fully dressed. he went over to janine and kissed her cheek, standing next to her. john felt his heart shatter into a million pieces as he saw janine kiss sherlock. he's seen them do it a thousand times, but each time just got worse a worse.

john cleared his throat, "i should get going."

sherlock nodded. "yeah. i'll text you about that thing." he said and watched john.

"you know, i don't think you need to, i made up my mind." john said and walked around the couple and to the door.

"you sure?" sherlock asked eagerly as he turned around.

"yep." john said flatly then left.

sherlock ran a hand through his hair and pulled at it with anger. he was finally losing john. he was losing him and it hurt like hell.

"babe, can you take my bags upstairs?" janine asked. "i am exhasuted." she said then started for the stairs.

"yeah." sherlock said softly, grabbing the two bags that sat at the door. he went up the stairs after his fiancee and followed her into the bedroom where the bed was put back together and clean. he set the bags down next to the closet. "i'll be in the study." he said then left, closing the door.

What was that?

What was what?

What the hell did you mean when you said that earlier?

That means I don't care when Janine leaves again, I'm not doing this any more.

Can you call me?

So we can talk this through?

No.

John, please.

I'm not doing it any more, Sherlock. I'm done.

John come on.

Can we please talk about this?

[Read; 14:43]

sherlock slammed his phone down on his desk and leaned back in his chair, running his hands through his hair. he rubbed his face, smudging the tears everywhere as he rested his elbows on the desk. then he started to cry, keeping it controlled so janine didn't hear. he locked himself in the study the rest of the night, saying he had a problem with work.

john and him had been best friends for sixteen years, becoming boyfriends when they were fifteen. they kept it undercovers because sherlock's parents were strict and old fashioned. they picked his girlfriends, picked his schooling, and picked his career. the only part of his life that they let him keep was john. they loved john. he was a perfect best friend for sherlock, good grades, captin of the rugby team and was studying to be a doctor. they let john come over any time, not knowing that him and their son were doing the dirty every time he stayed the night after they started dating. then janine's family moved in down the street from holmes' and everything went "kaboom" in john and sherlock's world. they were both in their third year of uni at the time janine moved in and when sherlock came home for the summer, he was introduced, then forced to ask out. sherlock let it last for about a year, then he broke up with her, but that made his parents very pissed off at him and then her parents got pissed at him, so he asked her out again and he proposed last year. and he knew he'd lose john, but he didn't. john stayed. he stayed and now he was leaving which left sherlock heartbroken. all he wanted was to be with john. with john, married to john, living with john. not to be sneaking around with him every time janine was off on buisness.

"sherlock?" the thick scottish accent spoke through the door. "are ya coming to bed?"

sherlock sighed and got up from his chair, wiping his face then going to the door and unlocking it and opening it. "yeah, i'll be in there in a few."

janine nodded. "you alright?" he asked, rubbing his chest.

sherlock nodded. "yeah, fine. just the idiots in the office."

janine smiled up at him. "don't stay up too late." she said and gave him a kiss before heading back to the room.

sherlock walked back over to his desk amd checked his phone again, still not seeing any word from john. he sighed and pocketed his phone then made his way to the bedroom, getting changed then getting in bed with janine. she turned and looked at sherlock then kissed him, getting a kiss back.

Are we still on for the stag night?

I invited Greg and Mike. We'll pick you up at eight.

Okay.

there weren't any words exchanged between the two until the stag night. john picked up greg and mike then they went to get sherlock. they walked to a club and that's when the fun started. the stag night originally was supposed to be just john and sherlock at john's place with a dinner and sex. now, they sat at a booth in some club and sherlock wasn't even next to john. he sat across from him and john was laughing at something with greg and mike while sherlock just kept his drinks coming.

"i gotta, gotta go to the toilet." sherlock slurred and got up from the booth, making his way to the toilets. he leaned against the sink and splashed his face with water then looked at himself in the mirror. "miserable fuck." he muttered to himself in the mirror then went to get a paper towel to dry his face off. there were not paper towels in the machine and sherlock punched the thing, putting a hole through the plastic as his nerves were going off one by one.

"sherlock?" a voice asked.

sherlock turned his head and looked at the person that spoke. it was john. he frowned and pulled his hand out if the paper towel despenser. "what?" he asked as he looked at his cut and bloody hand.

"what happened?" john asked as he walked over to sherlock, looking at his hand.

"there were no paper towels."

"so you punched it?" john asked and directed them to a stall to get some toilet paper.

sherlock nodded and watched john clean his hand with the toilet paper.

"does it hurt?" john asked and looked at sherlock.

sherlock shrugged. "i'm really drunk."

john huffed out a laugh. "yeah, no shit." he said and pulled sherlock out of the stall. he put his hand under the sink then threw away all the bloody toilet paper.

"where's greg and mike?" sherlock asked.

"they went to find the strippers." john said and took sherlock's hand out of the water. "i'm going to have to wrap this, you cut it pretty badly." he said and turned the sink off.

"alright. can we go to the bar, i have to pay for the dispenser."

john laughed. "sherlock, you're drunk."

"and?"

"destruction of property." john laughed. "we can't get you in trouble with the fuzz on your stag night."

"oh." sherlock said softly. "where are we going then? i can't go back home cause janine is having her party there."

"we can go back to my place." john said and started pushing sherlock out of the restroom.

"okay." sherlock said and started walking through the crowd, keeping close to john so he would get lost. john paid for the drinks then they left, standing out on the street while john hailed a cab. john got sherlock in the cab with his bleeding hand then got him safely to his flat and inside. john set sherlock on the couch while he went and got the first aid kit from the bathroom. he sat on the coffee table and cleaned off sherlock's hand again, then wrapped it up.

"why were you ignoring me?" sherlock asked as he watched john make tea from the couch.

"i wasn't." john said as he poured the tea.

"i texted you, then you left me on read." sherlock said. "then i tried to call you a few times and you sent me to voice mail and the only time that you actually responded was when i asked if tonight was still on."

john carried the mugs into the living room and set one on the coffee table then gave the other to sherlock. "you're getting married." john responded and put a few pills in sherlock's hand. "take those." he said and sat in the chair next to the couch, grabbing his tea.

sherlock took the pills and drank the tea to wash them down. "i know that."

john sighed and set his tea down, standing up. "i don't want to do this tonight." he said.

"then when can we do it?" sherlock asked. "i'm getting married and you won't talk to me anymore. we've been dating since we were fifteen!" he said and stood up.

"not any more, sherlock." john said. "you are marrying a woman that you have been with since you were twenty two. that was pretty much when our realtionship ended."

sherlock frowned and looked at john. "what d'you mean?"

"since you started going out with janine, i've just been on the side. i've always been on the side because you're too scared to face your parents. you're too scared to tell them that you don't love janine, but you're still marrying her. and it makes me feel like a piece of shit." john said. "i keep telling myself to stop this, to get this out of my head, but i can't." john sniffled. "i can't and you know why?" he asked sherlock.

sherlock shook his heads.

"it's because i've fallen in love with an idiot like you." he said strongly, tears streaming down his face. he turned around and wiped his face. "you know where the extra blankets are." he sniffled the walked to his room.

sherlock fell back onto the couch, staring into nothingness. over the years they've been together, they never confessed their love for one another. he has always loved john, but never said anything. ever. neither of them did. and now, a week from the wedding, with drunk thoughts, he was thinking about giving his parents a visit tomorrow and telling them that he wanted to marry john not janine. but then he remembered he was drunk, and just laid down, forgetting it.

in the morning, john went into work just so he could avoid sherlock, making sherlock just go back home. when he got home, the cleaning lady was cleaning up the disaster of the living room and sherlock's nerves started to go off again. he went upstairs and into the bedroom, hearing janine in the bathroom. he didn't go in there, he just went to the closet and changed out of the clothes he was in, into clean ones.

"what happened to your hand?" janine asked, pointing at sherlock's wrapped hand.

"oh, i fell," he said with a small smile.

janine laughed softly. "you're an idiot, y'a know that?"

sherlock nodded and went to the bathroom to change the bandages. "how was last night? i saw the mess." he said as he took out the first aid kit.

janine smiled. "it was good. we figured out something." she said, on her toes.

"figured out what?" sherlock asked as he unwrapped his hand.

"i'm pregnant!" she said with a huge grin.

sherlock's eyes went wide as he looked at her. he tried to be happy, but he couldn't. he didn't want a kid with janine. he didn't even want to be with her in the first place.

"you don't look excitied," she frowned.

"i am, really." sherlock smiled. "i'm just hungover, and i'm trying not to make this bleed again." he said and gestured at his hand. "tell me again after lunch, i will respond better."

janine smiled at him. "do you want me to bring you anything?" she asked.

sherlock shook his head. "i'll be fine."

"alright, well i'll be downstairs." she said and kissed sherlock's cheek before walking out of the bathroom.

sherlock sighed and took out his phone, texting john.

Janine's pregnant.

Congragulations. I'm happy for you two.

John. This is a problem.

So? I'm not with you anymore, I'm just your best friend.

Come on, John.

No, Sherlock. I'm not doing it.

I'll be by Friday around noon to pick you up.

Alright.

sherlock shoved his phone back into his pocket then rewrapped his and awfully, shoving everything back into the first aid kit then shoved back into the cupboard. he went off to his study and locked the door before grabbing a book off the shelf and chucking it across the room. he panted and sat at his desk, looking at the picture of him and john from a few years ago. he slammed the picture down and rubbed his face, running his hands through his hair as he leaned back in the chair.

after lunch, sherlock went downstairs amd found janine making lunch, he sat at the table and watched her bring a plate over to him then sat down across from him. "why d'you look like that?" she asked and watched sherlock.

"look like what?" sherlock asked.

"look like you've been crying. is something wrong?"

sherlock sighed and made eye contact with janine. "i have to say something, and i know you're going to get mad and cry at the most part, but i need you to sit and listen."

janine nodded. "i'm listening."

"i don't want to marry you. i don't want to be a father to your children, i don't want you to have my last name. but i do want to do those things with john. we've been dating since we were fifteen and we've been seeing each other the seven years we've been together." sherlock said then watched for janine's reaction; she smiled. she was smiling at sherlock and not in the bad way.

"i know, you idiot." she said.

"how long?"

"when i came home at the begining of the month." she said. "you had john's socks on and then the conversation between you too and then your actions for the rest of the night."

"oh." sherlock said softly. "are you mad?" he asked.

janine shrugged. "i was at first, but then everything started lining up and i figured out that you two have always been together. i was even more pissed about that but then i realized you are still with me to make my family happy, and yours." she said and took sherlock's hands.

"and what about the baby?" sherlock asked. "and the wedding?"

"we can call off the wedding tonight and i'm going to raise it." she said. "i'm just glad you said something now and not during the wedding. or three years from now."

"so you don't mind if i leave now and go to john?" sherlock asked.

janine shook her head. "just be back so we can tell our parents together that the wedding is off."

sherlock nodded as he got up. he kissed janine's head and smiled at her. "you're an amazing person, thank you."

she smiled back. "your cerfuew is eleven."

sherlock grinned, "got it." he said then ran to the front door, grabbing his shoes and coat then running out to the street and hailing a cab. he told the cabbie the adress then put his shoes on. the second he arrived at the clinc, he threw some money at the cabbie then he bolted into the building. he showed his badge to the secretary then ran through the doors, going striaght to john's room. the door was opened so he went in, closing the door. before john could say anything, sherlock already ahd his lips connected with john's, kissing him deeply.

"the wedding's off." sherlock panted.

"so we can be together then?" john asked.

sherlock smiled and nodded. "we can be together."

john smiled back and kissed sherlock again. "i love you."

"i love you, too."