Heyo, hows everyone doing? I'm not doing my best at the moment if I'm being honest...lots of things are happening too quickly and I'm struggling to even register them and keep up.

I'll start off with that I've been bed ridden all day...literally. Now some might say thats no big deal because I got to miss school but I feel quite the opposite to this idea. Mock exams are coming up again in about 8 weeks and I'm already panicking just typing it out so I really need as much studying as possible. On top of that I had some late homework that needed to be handed in today or I'd get detention, though I hope my teacher will make an exception in the case that I physically couldn't leave bed without collapsing onto my knees and hacking up mass amounts of phlegm and bile :/. Sorry, I guess that was too much information...

Moving on from that less than hot stuff, I haven't been great on the mental side of things either. My friend was trying to joke with me last night to make me feel better about if she gave me bleach to clean my unremovable stains on my white clothes, that she was worried that I'd end up drinking it like Eva Smith from the play we are learning about in class...and now I can't get the idea out of my head. Kinda wanting to do it now.....but I know I can't just yet. I have to at least say goodbye to everyone first, right? Things are definitely taking a turn for the worse and I just wanted to give you all a mini heads up of possible future events....

I am definitely in need of love and affection in a romantic sense for a reason I don't understand. I don't mean sexual attention...I just mean romantic gestures that couples would do, except I'm single. And no boy or girl would want to go out with me. I'm ugly, depressed and suicidal, and thats not even my personality. You could say I'm a mix between a yandere and tsundere when it comes to friends and family. Even with my closest friends I can be blunt and cold, despite the fact I'm overprotective of them and scared for them to be scarred by the world I've learnt to grow up in.

How's everyone else? Oh and thanks to Avarice_King-_-8 for being the only helpful soul for my book ideas. Appreciate you, sister!