Caitlin looked closely watching Julien with her.  The tenderness in his eyes killed her. His arms possessively holding her by him was ripping her into shreds. It was obvious he loved her. Never once did Julien make an effort to make her feel special or held her as he was holding Annie. He was always cold and distant when they were together.

"I've heard the rumors...ice queen, I can see why now...I don't know what he even sees in you."  Eyeing Annie up and down distastefully.  "You really look like a stiff, cold, heartless statue." Switching her gaze back and forth between the two of them. "Oh, and there is just one more thing I'd like to share before we finish up here...he's great in bed." Caitlin revealed in all seriousness. 

They were going to suffer for hurting her, watching greedily as Annie's body tenses like an ice sculpture.

Once Cailtin uttered those words, Annie's head snapped up making the layers around her face appear disheveled. 

A instantaneous switch flipped inside her. 

All the pain and the hurt molded within a nanosecond, into hate and anger.  It was gnawing her insides as it burnt in her blood like hot molten lava. The defeated look was wiped clean off her face, left behind was a face contorted with fury.   Never before has she felt such lack of control. 

No more....She thought with a shake of her head.

No more allowing anyone to step on her. 

No more letting anyone hurt her emotionally. 

Time to show people how Ice cold she can become.

Wrenching her arm from Julien's slack grip, she noticed from the corner of her eyes as he stood stunned-speechless at Caitlin, the disbelief penetrating his features making Annie scoffed internally. 

"You sick twisted bìtch."  Annie said calmly and quietly, taking long strides to close the short gap between them.  She watched in satisfaction as Caitlin took small steps back in fear and the smug expression could no longer be seen on her face. 

Before Annie could take another step, Julien caught her wrist and spun her towards him. She struggled against him, pushing against his rock hard chest, refusing to look him in the eye.  "Stay out of this!  You've done enough don't you think?"  She said bitterly to his face. 

In an instant he released her without a word.   Mustering all the courage she had, Annie turned and away from him and focused on her target, Caitlin.

They stood face to face.  As she was backing away, Cailtin became cornered against the console and mirror standing against the wall.   A beautiful tall vase full of white roses stood on top of the table.  Annie imagined smashing the vase over her head or maybe emptying the contents of the vase and soaking her in old-stale water.   But it wasn't enough to satisfy the gnawing need to hurt her and take back the degrading comment.

Just seconds before she knew what course of action she was going to take, a flashing scene played in front of her eyes— the memory of them kissing passionately in front of her.  It could not be erased nor the stabbing pain she felt that day and every day afterward.

With all the strength she could muster, Annie raised her hand and a resounding slap echoed against the walls of the grand foyer. It was slightly satisfying yet still not enough to erase the what she felt.  The only thing Annie felt was the numbing, swelling and pounding of her red fingers and palm. 

The hustle, bustle and small talk ceased not a second later.  People's gasps were heard above the silence that stretched over the audience who made a circle around them like a hovering cloud.  Somewhere in the background a baby wailed but was instantly silenced. 

Lips set in a grim line, Annie looked up from her hand to Caitlin's shocked expression.  Her face was turned to the side from the force of the blow.  The hand print left behind was outlined on her smooth pale skin.  Clutching her swelling cheek with lips trembling, Caitlin broke down in tears and started wailing in pain. 

"You'll get over it.  It's the least you deserve.  Show your face to me ever again and I'll make what I just did look like a walk in the park."  With that said Annie turned on her heel heading to the entrance.

Applause broke out in the crowd.  Annie ignored the curious stares and quiet nods of approval with her head held up high.   She marched with determined strides, leaving behind Julien standing stiffly watching her like a hawk—his expression unreadable.   

Giving Caitlin one last menacing glare Julien briskly passed the crowd. Despite the slap she received, he listened to the faint sputter of curses that left her lips in their wake. 
********
He caught up to Annie who was outside of the lobby sitting on a waiting bench, her arms wrapped around her waist, staring straight into the distance. Giving the valet his name, the car was brought up quickly.  After several attempts to unlock her from the stiff position and grave, solum trance, Julien ushered Annie's numb body into the passenger side and managed to buckle her seat belt. 

Once in his car, Julien turned as she looked straight ahead, hands clasped tightly in her lap, avoiding any form of contact with him.  "Nothing happened."  Julien repeated clenching his teeth in frustration.  She was pulling further away from him, he could feel it in her body language. 

Unwillingly Annie's gaze retuned to Julien's.  The desperation evident in his eyes—the need to be believed emitted out of him. "...Just so you know, he's great in bed..."  The words echoed in her head. 

Aside from the betrayal and the humiliation, the ugly feeling of jealousy coursed inside of her.  What she would not give him he had received from somebody else.

"I don't believe you."  She retorted.  "No need to spare my feelings.  You're a man after all,  you have needs and she was there to appease you."  It killed her to say those words out loud. 

Folding her hands across her chest Annie watched outside the tinted window of his Porsche sedan at the hotels guests as they waited for their vehicles being brought up by the valet.  Now that they were alone the vulnerability resurfaced making her hollow, penetrable and weak.

He was her only weakness. 

Tears burned the back of her throat once more, but she refused to cry.  To breakdown again was not an option.  For the last few months she's shed enough tears to start a lake.  The sheer power of will stamped down on that urge.  The lack of control over her emotions was like an out to of control airplane. 

Love did this to her.  Love weakened her.  She did this to herself.

Julien ran a hand through his hair in frustration, gripped the steering wheel and parked close to the side walk along the entrance of the hotel. Things needed to be cleared up before they proceeded.

"Take me home," as the first thing she blurted out after a long stretch of silence.  But instantly remembered her car was in valet, "wait my car is still here..."  Reaching for the doors handle. 

"It's been taken care of. The only ride home is going to be with me. We are not moving an inch from here until you understand. I don't care if it'll take me all day, you are going to listen to me!" Julien snapped, the anger quickly rising once again. Annie's eyes widened in shock, as she turned to him.

"What more do you want me to understand?   I sat back and watched the both of you Julien, don't forget that. I watched from afar how the both of you went out and were together for months. Don't sit there and keep telling me nothing happened!" Annie was furious. All the frustration, hurt, pain, betrayal, anger and loss spurted toward the surface like a volcano erupting after years of silence. "I can ignore the fact you did not know but it's killing me at the same time. How could you?" She was afraid she was not ready to hear the answer to her question. She was also certain she was not ready for their relationship to end either.

Julien sat there and listened, taking deep breaths to calm his inner beast while clutching the steering wheel with a death grip. He laid his head on the headrest behind him and closed his eyes before speaking. "We did not have séx...." He said with conviction. "I admit we shared a few kisses here and there but nothing like what you're imagining and nothing like what Caitlin insinuated. We were never that intimate. Do not blame me for things I could not control. I was not conscious of our relationship." Keeping his eyes shut he listened as Annie shifted uncomfortably in the passenger seat.

"First you say it was only kisses.  Then you say don't blame you for what you couldn't control?  I don't understand!  Let me get this straight.  So you think I should ignore the fact you slept with her and move on."  Raising her eyebrows.  "I don't think so. Memories or not. I am beyond disgusted. I am human with feelings and a beating heart Julien, not dead meat. That low life piece of shìt made me look like the biggest fool. She humiliated me," pointing at her chest.  "She humiliated you and herself....you should have told me..." Annie was breathing in and out heavily. She was never one to use foul language but it just came out without control. "I'm so tired of being hurt. I know, I know you could not remember me but you will never know or feel what I saw, what I felt. Nobody will." She too rested her head against the headrest in defeat, sagging against her seat closing her eyes. "I stayed strong for as long as I could. I prayed constantly that something would rekindle your memories of us. You can't erase or numb the pain of every second of every day that passed. I gave you my all. Trusted you with everything. I handed you my heart, trusting you not to break it. And here you are ending up doing worse. My nerves are shot and beyond repair...I can't do this anymore."  Rubbing her temple. 

The promise of a new beginning burned in the ashes right in front of her eyes. 

"Since we met, I have never been more intimate with anyone but you. Your body is the only body I have kissed and touched. Nobody else. Believe me." He said between clenched teeth. 

Annie sat up and blushed crimson in color, the heat of her cheeks made her feel overheated in the confines of the car.  Julien opened his eyes and sat straight in his seat, twisting his body in her direction. 

"I'm sorry for everything I have put you through.  I know it was not easy.  This is the last thing I want.  As stubborn as you are I am even more stubborn. I will fight for you with everything I have.   I can feel you pulling up the walls to protect yourself again.   Do not  succumb to the doubts.  Believe in us... Believe in me..."  He said with finality reaching out and grasping her ice cold hands. 

Annie tried retracting her hands away but his death grip was too strong to fight in her weak and exhausted state.   She stared into his deep grey eyes wanting to believe him.  It just hurt too much to acknowledge or decipher what was right.  This was her fault just as much as his.

"Why would she lie, why would you?"  She asked him desperately.  He never answered, his features only darkened.  "Julien I need time to think straight.  So much has happened and it's overwhelming.  Please take me home."  She said reluctantly as a deep resigned sadness and acceptance settled over her.  Before turning to look out the window, she noticed the muscle in his cheek bounce with renewed anger.

That is not what he wanted to hear from her.  He understood she was hurting but  he could not let her go.  He would not give up on her.  "Very well.  I will take you home, but this is far from over." 
*****

"What happened? Why is she upset?"  Patrick asked him as he entered his study.  He watched as his daughter hurriedly make her way upstairs, taking two steps at a time and never looking back. 

"Caitlin happened."  Julien replied tightly, winching internally when he uttered her distasteful name past his lips.
*****

Annie's hands trembled as she pulled her dress off.  She took another shower to wash away and scrub herself clean of the memories of the events of the day that threatened to choke her.  Despite the hot water, Annie was shivering and numb when she stepped out of the shower.  She dressed carefully in tight light wash skinny jeans, a white tank top and white cardigan.

She wasn't sure they could ever be the same again.  No matter how much she hoped things would be okay, that Julien explained everything, she wasn't sure it would ever be right again.  Waiting for him all these months and finally able to grasp him and their love once more, was like finding a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. 

But now, now it was burned to a crisp. First the accident took him away from her then Caitlin, and now the lies.  How could she be so foolish?  She should have questioned herself, questioned him more.  How easily she melted in his arms and believed what her heart wanted to hear. 

It was difficult to not doubt him.  He could say anything to her to win her back and she wouldn't know the truth.  He asked her to believe in him.  A part of her did and the other didn't.  She wanted to run back to him and have him engulf her in his strong, warm welcoming embrace and tell her it was all a nightmare, that it wasn't true. 

Unfortunately it was all very real...the sickening image of the two of them happy, holding hands, kissing, making love, kept playing in front of her eyes, flashing image after sickening image into her mind, again and again. The humiliation ran deep in her blood. It was too late.  The seed of doubt already planted itself into her mind. 

She spied herself in the mirror and started to blow dry her wet hair.  The revulsion showed on her turned down lips, the devastation evident in her eyes and the loss was seen in her deflated posture.   Looking sad and feeling sorry for herself made things worse.

"One of these days I'll wake up and get over you." She said to her image in the mirror. "You were my lesson I had to learn."  Annie bit down on her trembling bottom lip. The tears misted her vision, her nose tingled with the fresh bout of tears wanting to burst free.  Fighting to hold them back, she sniffled staring at the determination in the sharp angles of her face.   "No.  Control yourself. You can do this.  Conceal—don't feel...don't feel." She chanted.

Annie finished styling her hair dry and pulled it up in a bun on the top of her head.  Putting the styling supplies back in the drawers, she heard the door to her bedroom open revealing Cici in blue jeans and grey sweatshirt.  She closed the door and approached her expectantly.

"What's going on Angie?  What happened?  Why is Julien with dad downstairs having a heated discussion?   The rest of his family is here too. I thought you guys..."  The concern was evident on her face.  Annie pursed her lips looking away and back at the mirror.  Her face was pale and devoid of all emotion.  

Taking the mascara from her make-up drawer she applied some, making her eyes pop out.  She smeared some lipstick and blush to give her face color then turned back to Cici who was watching her patiently waiting for an answer.

"Caitlin happened.  The bîtch appeared at the hotel when we were leaving.  Accusing Julien of dumping her with no reason.  She was pissed obviously.  All the while expressing what they had was special and pretty much hinted that they were séxually active, while rubbing it in my face."  Annie said impassively, with not an ounce of feeling. 

Cici's eyes doubled in size. "What. A. Bitch." Responding back while shaking her head.

"Precisely what I said." Annie relied with a quirked eyebrow. "Can you believe it?" Pacing back and forth Annie continued her voice rising to new octaves. "He got his memories the night before, was the mystery bidder in the auction. Things were cleared between us and we were going to live out our happily ever after when the cherry on the sundae was topped off with his ex showing up as we were about to leave!" Annie declared emphasizing her words with hand gestures.

"So what your telling me is the shît hit the fan?" Despite the turn of events, Cici's sense of humor made Annie chuckle lightly in amusement.

"Literally."  She replied, crossing the room and laying down on her bed looking up at the ceiling.  "Oh, and before we left I slapped her." 

Cici's jaw hung open. 

"Wait.  What?  You slapped her!" 

Her younger sister only nodded.

"You can't catch a break can you?"  Cici laid down beside her.  "It's like the biggest cluster fûck of all time." She flipped on her side to face Annie watching the side her face as she frowned. "Did Julien confirm or deny what she said?" She asked.

Annie rolled her eyes. "Of course he denied it. He asked me to believe in him, to believe in us." She said with a sigh. "To be honest I really don't know what to believe." Propping her hands behind her head, she kept her gaze up at the ceiling. "He claimed they only shared a few kisses, nothing more..."

"Do you love him?" Cici asked softly.

"Yes, you know I do. He told me last night while he had amnesia that he loved me but was afraid to listen to his feelings. And it's been eating my insides since he told me! All this time he wanted me, loved me, and never once came to me, instead he stayed with her!" Her face turned red at her ranting.  "It makes me sick! How can I live with that, huh? How? I can't stop imagining them in bed together. I think I'm going to be sick." She says covering her mouth.

"Slow down there tiger. He fell in love with you all over again?" Annie turned her head toward Cici, watching the wonder on her face. "He was the mystery bidder that went to all the trouble and spent millions just to be with you while he had amnesia? Wow Annie, that's deep." Annie nodded with a frown. "What if he is telling the truth and Caitlin is just being a cruel-spiteful bîtch?" Cici continued.

Annie did not have an answer. Caitlin had no back bone, no self respect, no dignity, by pointedly referring to their personal experiences and rub it in her face. It was true she was being spiteful on purpose, that much was obvious.

Desperate times always called for desperate measures and Annie was aware people will do and say anything, even lie to achieve their purpose. But who was lying and who was telling the truth?

"Wait you said something earlier..." Frowning deeply. "You said Julien is here with his family?"  Annie was really confused now, recalling Cici telling her the St. James' where downstairs with their father.  Why would they all be here? 

Cici hesitated and shrugged carelessly, looking away, not able to meet Annie's pointed stare.  She couldn't tell her.  It was supposed to be a surprise but after hearing the events of the past few hours she didn't know if it was relevant anymore. "Nothing, they're here to talk to dad or something..."

"You're a lousy liar.  I can tell there's more. Spill it out."  Annie said in a deadpanned voice as she sat up against her headboard, folding her arms across her chest.  Something was off. She caught Cici's panicked expression and narrowed her eyes suspiciously. 

Cici wanted to cower in the corner of the wall.  Annie's hard stare was calculating and observing her every move.  "Stop starring at me like that!"  This was the Annie she was used to— intimidating, forceful, controlling and tough.  After all these months, she finally came out of her shell.   "You seem a little calmer then earlier."  Cici observed. 

"I've felt it all, seen it all, and lived it all. I have been desensitized. I have nothing left.  Don't change the subject.  What are you hiding and I want a answer now!"  She was hiding something important, Annie could feel it. 

"It was supposed to be a surprise!  I can't tell you.  It's not up to me to tell.  You'll find your answer from Julien.  Maybe you two should talk again and clear up the confusion...?"  Cici said finding no other excuse while getting up from Annie's bed and walking backwards toward her bedroom door for a quick escape.

"Not so fast.  You're keeping a secret from me and I want to know what it is!"  Annie stood from her sitting position advancing on Cici before she could leave.  What does this have to do with Julien?

Cici sighed and stopped in her tracks deciding to tell her anyway.  She was going to find out soon enough.  "The St. James' aren't the only ones here...Uncle Brett's downstairs, Sonny and Sheila are coming to witness what was going to happen here today...."  Annie raised her eyebrows expectantly waiting for Cici to finish, "He-he was...Julien was going to ask you to marry him in front of all of us."

Annie's limbs froze in shock, forcing her to halt her steps in the middle of the room. Blinking several times she looked down at the carpeted floor, feeling her heart drop down between her legs.  The hair on her arms stood on end.  Whatever blood was on her face rushed down her neck.  A cold sweat erupted over her forehead.  A strangled cry creeped up her throat but died down before she could release it.

Annie faintly heard the door close.  A new wave of excruciating pain spread like poison in her body.  The burning of the stomach acid boiling inside of her threatened to rise up her throat. 

Having no strength to stand upright, she collapsed.  Falling to the floor with a thump, barely bracing herself on her hands.  The very core of her foundation was shaken.

Breathing in, breathing out.  Annie laid her cheek flat on the floor unblinking, seeing nothing, feeling nothing, because there was...

Nothing left to figure out.

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Thanks so much for all the votes, reads and comments, it means so much to me!

-Shaz