The smell of the salt was as strong as she remembered. A cool morning breeze hit her in the face as the horn from the ferry sounded, and the sun began playing peek-a-boo over the horizon. Over one shoulder was her green duffle bag stuffed to the brim with wrinkled clothes. At her feet was her suitcase, filled with any art supplies she could carry. And in her hand was the letter she had received one year ago. The paper was now crinkled with age, and the words had faded and smudged, her own skin oils being the culprit. She'd read the words probably a hundred times over the course of the year, and she'd thought about them even more. And now here she was. Accepting the gift they'd given her at last.

A year ago, as she stood in her old bedroom at her grandma's house, dressed in black and alone, looking at all the pieces of art the two of them had done together over the years, she'd squeezed the letter in her hand and sobbed. It was the first time she'd cried since her mother had told her the news that would tear her apart inside like a woodchipper chowing down on an old Christmas tree. She'd stared at the pictures attached to the old vanity mirror and wished she could go back to those days. Smiling a crooked smile with her grandma, her ginger red hair a vast contrast against her grandma's long silver locks.

Her grandma was the only elderly woman she knew who let her hair fade naturally while still keeping it long. She'd said that her grandpa liked it that way, and while that was undoubtedly true, Emersyn knew her grandma had liked it too. She'd liked the idea of growing old. Not so much the things that came with age. The arthritic pains in her knuckles that made it difficult to hold a paintbrush steady, or the way her knees ached just before a storm came in. But of watching her family live around her, knowing that she'd never miss a moment. Knowing that the silver hairs atop her head had been earned, one-by-one, by loving deeply and being loved so in return.

She'd wanted to take a few of the art pieces home with her that day, but she didn't think her mom would approve of the extra clutter. Funny how much a person could change in one year. A year ago, Emersyn wanted nothing more than to earn her mother's love and affection. No, more than that, she wanted to feel like her mother would give it to her easily, the way her grandma had. But that was then, and this was now, and Emersyn was watching the sun rise in the east, the seagulls circling around the sea in the hopes of finding a morning snack.

The early bird gets the worm. Or in Emersyn's case, the early bird gets to go home. Finally. She folded the letter and shoved it back into her pocket. There were very few people on the ferry this early in the morning, and right now Emersyn was grateful for this. She was even more grateful that no one she knew was on the ferry. It was just her and her thoughts and her grief and her dreams. Not the dreams her mother had for her. But the dreams she had for herself. The ones she'd given up for the small hope that she could be the daughter her mother would want. The daughter her mother would choose. But now, she thought, as the ferry drew closer and closer to the island, she felt in her heart was her home, she knew it was more important that she be a person she would choose.

The ferry pulled into the port as the horn blared, signaling to everyone that it was time to get off. She tightened her grip around the strap of the bag that was hanging over her shoulder and pulled up the handle of her other suitcase. There wasn't much of a crowd as she got off the ferry, so once it pulled into port safely, she got off with ease. She pulled her phone out of her pocket, her fingers grazing the folded-up piece up paper, and checked the time. It wasn't even 7am yet. Her mom probably wouldn't be awake for a few more hours, especially since they'd both been up late arguing the night before. Emersyn was tired, but not so much from lack of sleep as she was just trying to be someone she never would be.

She was on the island, finally, but she still had a good drive until she made it to Coupeville. Her phone vibrated as she walked off the ferry, the sounds of tired workers, usually the only people on the ferry this early in the morning, shuffling all around her. A text from her uncle Kiel lit up her screen with the words, "I'm here, where are you?" She dropped the handle and responded that she had just stepped off the ferry and would head to the parking lot soon. Then she slid the phone back into her pocket next to the folded-up piece of paper, and began making her way to the parking lot, where her ride was waiting.

It didn't take long for her to recognize the beat-up old silver Ford, or the man sitting in the driver's seat. He tapped his horn when he saw her, and she felt a small smile tug at the corners of her lips. It had been too long. A whole year since she'd last seen him. He hopped out of the truck when she approached, and before she'd even had a chance to set down her luggage, he rushed forward and wrapped her in a huge bear hug. He smelled like sawdust, sweat, and cocoa butter. She breathed him in, feeling the sting of tears in her eyes and vowing to never go so long without seeing him again.

"How was your trip?" he asked her, his hands on her shoulders as he searched her face for clues as to why she had decided to come back so suddenly. He wouldn't find any answers there. The mask was too thick now. She wasn't the fifteen-year-old girl she'd been when she'd left the first time. A lot had changed. "Oh here, let me help you with those," he said, gesturing to her bags. She didn't even have a chance to argue before he grabbed her two bags from her and set them in the bed of his truck. Then he made his way back to the driver's seat and said, "Hop in. We're going to Mama's."

Her stomach rumbled at the mention of the name, and she didn't realize how hungry she was until just now. She jumped into the passenger seat of his truck and slammed the door as hard as she could to make sure it stuck. Funny, no matter how much time went by, or how much money he made from his business, he would never buy a new truck. He'd had the same old beat-up Ford since he was a teenager. She remembered being a little girl and listening to his stories about all the shenanigans he'd gotten into with her dad in that very truck. She closed her eyes for a moment and pictured her dad sitting where she was now. She did this almost every time she was in Kiel's truck. And he pretended not to notice, but she knew he did.

"So," he said again as they pulled out of the parking lot and onto the first road that would take them to Coupeville. Home. "How was your trip?"

She shrugged. "It was okay. Fast. I left so early that I think I missed rush hour."

"Hopefully you missed breakfast then," he said, unable to contain his grin. She leaned back against the headrest. "Because I have a hankerin' for some waffles."

She smiled back at him. "Chocolate chip waffles?" she asked.

"On two conditions," he replied, and she knew what was coming next. "First, only if it comes with vanilla ice cream. And second—"

"Only if you can have the first bite," she finished, and yes. This was how it should be. Easy. Her mother would never have let her have chocolate chip waffles with ice cream for breakfast. Egg white omelets with more veggies than actual eggs. Her mom was health conscious, which Emersyn always thought was funny and ironic given her mother's history with substance abuse. But she never fought it before. And she never really thought about fighting it. Which, to be honest, was the problem.

They were quiet for a few seconds, and Emersyn felt the ease of the moment begin to slip away. But then Kiel hit a red light, turned and looked at her and said, "I missed you, little lady."

And there it was. That sting in her eyes again. She blinked an extra few times and looked at her shoes. She hated shoes. She always felt like they were too constricting. Suffocating, even. A lump formed in her throat. She couldn't remember the last time she'd walked around with no shoes. Or the last time she went to Mama's. Or the last time she sat in this truck.

"I missed you too," she replied softly, and she wasn't just talking to him. But to her old self. The way she used to be before structure and fitness and rules about when and where she could paint and draw and what or who she should be. She stared out the window, watching the cars pass by. And secretly she felt like she was counting down the minutes until she saw the Welcome to Coupeville sign. Population less than 2,000. Everyone knows everyone. A giant family of fisherman and church goers and do gooders. Her dad had been all of those things. Her mom had been none of them.

And Emersyn knew now, after wondering her entire life, which parent she was most like. And she couldn't believe she'd ever questioned it to begin with. She always wanted to be with her mom. But now that she had, she couldn't wait to get away and find the part of her dad that still lived inside her somewhere.

Authors Note: Happy Valentine's Day to all you beautiful people! As a special Valentine's Day treat, I thought I would release not one, not two, but THREE chapters of Hello, Goodbye. This will be all I can share with you for a little longer but rest assured that you won't have to wait for very long. I am writing almost every night, and I'm currently sitting at over 80,000 words. Aiming for 130,000ish words, so I'm thinking one... maybe two more months. As promised, I plan on posting regular chapters starting in the spring.

Hello, Goodbye is a story that means so much to me. It's a story about loss and love, and it hits very close to home. The last few years have been difficult. I've lost a few men in my life, one of them being my own father. So this story is very personal for me, and I'm hoping you all will be able to feel some kind of connection to it as well.

It's MOSTLY unedited, so please be gentle. But be honest. If you see an error, you can point it out. I will fix it. Just know that this is not like Crescendo. It is not a final draft.

Okay, now with those few notes out of the way, I hope you enjoy these first three chapters. Can't wait to hear from you all!
XOXO
~Aly