A/N So this little story is based off the prompt:

"Better a broken heart than a broken neck!"

From @humble_garden_snail. I thought this was an interesting prompt, which is of course why I picked it. I'm just writing this as I go along, no prior planning. Hopefully it doesn't turn out too bad. 😅

Also, lippylu02, I lied. Sorry!

~Sofaloofa

"Are you serious?!"

My friend Jennifer looked at me with disbelief written all over her face, watching as I slowly stuffed another spoon of delicious, strawberry flavoured, frozen goodness into my mouth. I sniffled and nodded, turning to face my tv, which was currently playing some drama I found on Netflix.  I wasn't even sure why I put it on.

Jen moved so she was sitting on the couch next to me, awkwardly clasping her hands together in search of something to say. I didn't blame her, there wasn't much you could respond with after what I had just told her. It's not like you could say "I'm so sorry, that must be terrible," because in reality it wasn't actually that bad. But it hurt like hell.

"So let me get this straight... You had no idea? None, whatsoever, that you were dating an assassin?" Jen asked me, eyebrows raised. I could see her trying to work through this in her mind, and if I was honest I was still working through it as well. I shrugged.

"Yeah... It's... It's just weird, you know? I thought we... I thought we really had something special. That we would eventually settle down and... And maybe have kids," I stated sorrowfully, shoving another spoonful into my mouth. "But I can't date someone who kills people! It's against like, everything I live for!" I cried out, shoving even more ice cream in my mouth. Jen looked at me with pity in her eyes.

"Hey, it's better a broken heart than a broken neck!" She exclaimed in an attempt to get my mood up. It kind of worked. I mean, I guess the fact that I wasn't dead was something to be grateful for. I just hope now he didn't try to kill me because I broke up with him. That would suck.

"I guess," I started, sniffling once more. The tears had by now dried, leaving stains on my cheeks. "But still... I kinda wish I didn't find it out that way."

I shuddered as I recalled how exactly I found out that my ex was an assassin. The sheer amount of blood was enough to make a grown man throw up. But it wasn't the fact that he was a killer that scared me the most, it was the fact that he had kept it secret and I was naive enough to believe the lies...

I was quiet for some time, which must have made Jen quiet down. She no longer asked any questions, but silently watched the tv with my and my bowl of ice cream. My mind wasn't on the tv, however, because it was on him.

No, not in the lovey, sappy, "I miss him so much" way. More like how I was going to tell him exactly how I felt. Well, maybe not tell him, but show him. Yeah, I would show him. He wasn't the only one who told lies more often than the truth.

I looked at my watch, feigning exhaustion. "Jen, I should probably get to sleep. I still have work in the morning."

"Are you sure? You know, this is a legitimate reason not to go into work tomorrow," She replied, worry evident in her bright blue eyes. I gave her a small smile.

"It isn't really a reason, but nice try. Thanks for coming over Jen, I really appreciate your help," I said, showing her to the door. She waved goodbye and I waved back, closing the door as she left.

With a sigh of relief I walked into my kitchen, grabbing my ice cream on the way. I scooped another spoon into my mouth and grabbed my kitchen knife, shoving it into my bag. I put on a pair of gloves and grabbed some rope. As I was walking to my door, bag packed, I spotted some duct tape. Deciding that it would be useful too, I stuffed that in my bag as well.

Tonight was going to be an interesting night. Mostly likely it would be fun. For me at least.

I whistled as I ambled down the street, almost excited for what was to come. He only lived a few blocks down the street, so it shouldn't be that strenuous of a walk. I liked that. As I walked, I remembered what Jen had told me. It was better that I had a broken heart. Who knows, this man could have killed me!

I arrived at his place, walking around to his back door. I picked the lock with a bobby pin and it swung open for me, almost greeting me. I giggled.

I snuck up his stairs, toward his room. After several months of dating, I knew his schedule. He was always asleep by this time. Silly him, I should have taught him not to have such a regular schedule. Oh well, his loss. I grabbed the nearest metal object, conveniently a metal pipe. Thank you sir, for being a plumber by day.

I snuck into his room, seeing his sleeping form on the bed. He didn't at all seem affected by our break up, which is one of the reasons I now could really not stand his face. No one who was upset would be sleeping. No one. I moved so I was beside him on the bed, mouth by his ear.

"Oh honey, you don't seem heartbroken," I said, gripping the pipe in sweaty palms. I heard a groan from him as his eyes fluttered open. I saw a moment of panic flicker in his eyes but I quickly knocked it out with the pipe. "I'm going to make you wish it was just heart that is broken...!" I chuckled, twirling a strand of his hair around my finger.

"After all, everyone knows that a broken heart is better than a broken neck, or say, broken ribs..."