who's gonna save you now?

Carter Jackson

"What are you and Rory going to do for Halloween?" Elijah asked as he opened a juice box. He sat down on the couch across from me as I responded to a text from the girl he was talking about.

"I don't know," I said.

"You haven't thought about it? I'm surprised, Logan's been up everyone's ass about this Halloween Bash." He sipped at the drink, finishing it almost immediately. "Why do they only put one drink in these?"

I rolled my eyes at his comment, shrugging. "We haven't really talked about it."

"Right, 'cause you and Rory never talk anymore," He said with a smirk. I felt my cheeks heat up, and I rubbed at them to make the flush go away.

"Elijah!"

"What?! I got quite the show at the drive-in, might I say." He giggled, "I was toning it down with Katie because of how you guys were there, but it looks like you didn't have the same idea."

"We didn't think you'd be by the car, Elijah. That's why we parked the way we did, remember? That way, we didn't see if the other couple was kissing." I glared at him, "Besides, why were you watching for that long?"

"Never said I was, just said I got quite the show." He winked, "Nothing to be embarrassed about, just took me by surprise for sure."

"Why do you say that?" I asked, looking at him as I slouched back further in my seat.

"I've never seen you openly be like that with anyone," He said. "Of course, the only girl I've ever seen you interested in before Rory was Ashley, and we all know how that went."

I rolled my eyes at where the topic was turning, knowing where he was going with it. "Elijah." I sternly said, sitting up further in my seat. "It's different."

"I'm sure!" He smirked, knowing he was getting to me. "I'm just saying, it's okay to admit you're in love with her."

"I don't think I'm in love with her. Like, sure, but not love." I corrected, standing up from my seat. "When are you leaving again?"

"Oh, tired of me already?" He asked as he followed me into the kitchen. I glared at him before grabbing a water bottle out of the fridge. I didn't say anything to his question and instead took a drink of the water, avoiding any type of eye contact with him.

"Look, man, anyone in a ten-mile radius can see that you're in love with Rory." Elijah continued when I didn't say anything.

This caused me to choke on my water, and once I finished my coughing fit, I sent him another glare as I set the water bottle on the counter. He stood on the other side, tapping his knuckles on the marble countertop.

"Why do you keep saying that? You're going to spread a rumor you didn't even mean to start if you keep saying shit like that." I crinkled the water bottle in my hand, causing it to pop.

Elijah rolled his eyes, not threatened by my tone at all. "You're not as scary as you used to be, Carter."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, letting go of the plastic.

"I'm just saying, now that I've seen the side of you that's around Rory - which might I say, answers a lot of questions as to how she can deal with your ass - just makes me think of you a little less scary and more like... a teddy bear." He smiled a toothy grin at the last words, giggling when I narrowed my eyes at him. "Ah, I get it." He then pointed a finger at me, "Nobody's supposed to see that side of you except for Rory. Right. I didn't see anything." He held his hands up in defense.

"Are you done yet?" I asked.

He chuckled, looking down at the countertop before looking back at me. "You're an ass when you're not self-aware, you know that right?"

"I'm an ass all the time," I muttered.

"If you were to have said that a few months ago, I'd have agreed with you before you could even finish that statement. Now? I don't think so," He said with a shrug. "But what do I know? I'm just a dumbass who happens to be around you all the time."

I didn't say anything, not really seeing the point of what Elijah was mumbling about. He got the message quickly and sighed as he walked back into the living room to grab his backpack. "Don't worry, fuckface, I'm leaving." He stated as if it weren't obvious, and I followed him toward the door.

"Nice to know you can still understand social cues despite all the alcohol in your system." I joked as I opened the door.

He slung his backpack over his shoulders, stopping directly in front of me. "I'll have you know, mate, that I'm completely sober."

"Really?" I asked, my brows bunching together. "That's unusual."

"I have been since the last party at Arrowway," He stated. "Guess you can say we're both affected by romance, eh?"

I didn't say anything, knowing what he was hinting at. He just tapped my shoulder a few times before walking out, heading down the porch, and in the direction he parked his car.

Without waiting to see him pull out, I shut the door. After grabbing my water bottle from the counter, I walked up the stairs to my room, shutting the door behind me.

The last thing I needed was Elijah putting some fantasy in my head that I'm falling in love. Sure, I have very strong feelings towards Rory, but realistically speaking, it's too soon to be love, right?

I know nothing about love. I wasn't super in love with Ashley like most would assume, and I was never in love before her. The only type of love I've ever seen that I know is genuine, real love, is between my parents.

Even then, they had known each other for years before getting together. They didn't get married after a long time of dating as my dad wanted to give the best for my mom, and he didn't have it when they began to date. He wanted to give her more than enough time to decide whether or not he was what she truly wanted, even though she knew the day they met.

Other than that, the only true love I've seen is in those romance movies. But they're all fake, right? I mean, the concept of love is scary.

How do you know you're in love? Cause I don't think I am. I can like Rory a lot and want to do nice things with and for her without that being love, right?

The doorbell rang twice, bringing me out of my thoughts. I groaned as I rubbed my hands across my cheeks, assuming Elijah had forgotten something.

Before I could even exit the room, it rang again, showing that the person on the other side of the door was impatient. I threw open my door and began to walk down the steps, groaning again when they continued to ring the doorbell.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Eli, what is i-" I stopped in my tracks as I looked at who was standing on the other side, speechless as it wasn't Elijah at all.

"Miss me?" Ashley stood there, a smug smirk on her face. She looked well put together as if she was coming here for something important.

"Who are you, Annabelle?" I scoffed, beginning to shut the door.

She slapped her hand over it, stopping it from moving any further than an inch. She tapped her manicured fingertips - a dark red - on the wood, causing it to sound a little creepy.

My eyes trailed back to her face, seeing that she still had that smirk on her face. "I don't think you want to do that, Carter."

I looked at her in confusion, wondering what the sudden deal was. She hadn't bothered trying to come to my house after we broke up, so why is she here?

"Let me in, Carter. You're going to want to hear this." She said after I didn't respond. I looked around, looking for her little posse of minions that usually followed her everywhere.

They were nowhere to be seen, not even in that shiny red expensive car that her parents got her for her sixteenth birthday. I rolled my eyes as I went against my gut feeling, moving to the side so she could come in.

She strutted in, taking her time. She held what looked to be a very expensive purse to her side, one that could fit my entire room in.

Okay, that's an exaggeration, but it's a pretty big fucking purse.

I watched as she looked around the room, hesitantly shutting the front door once she was fully in. She looked at the different photos littering around the house that my mom put up, along with multiple of the family at family photos.

"Cute," She mumbled to herself.

"What are you doing here?" I asked rudely, crossing my arms over my chest. I'd yet to leave my spot by the door, ready to fling it open if needed.

"Right to the point, I see." She turned to me, clearing her throat. "You need to dump that loser."

"Of fucking course," I muttered. "Get out, Ashley. I don't care to listen about how you don't want me anywhere near her."

"You say you don't care now, but you will." She set her purse on the couch Elijah had been sitting on only recently, and it made me begin to regret kicking him out the way I did.

Had Elijah been here, he'd have been able to annoy the shit out of Ashley until she left. Either that or she wouldn't have bothered, but unfortunately, I'm here all alone.

"Dump Rory." Ashley crossed her arms over her chest.

"No," I said, standing up straighter.

She took in a sharp breath, unhappy at being told no so quickly. I don't know what she expected. She came here, demands I dump the girl I care about more than anything else, and gets upset when I say no. Who does she think she is?

"I have to hand it to you, Carter, you entertained this girl longer than I thought you would." She stepped away from her spot. I watched as she made her way around the living room, looking at the miscellaneous decorations my mom had set up.

She brought her finger to the top of the mantle above the fireplace, one with photos of Logan and me when we were younger. She stopped in front of one that had just me in it, and I could see what looked to be a look of sadness in her eyes through the tiny reflection.

"Get to the point, Ashley," I mumbled, clearing my throat.

She stopped moving her finger, her eyes locking with mine through the reflection of little me playing football. She turned and faced me completely, rubbing her lips together. It smeared the red lipstick she was wearing slightly, and as if she could feel it, she wiped her index finger underneath, removing any excess makeup.

"If you don't end whatever little fling is going on between the two of you, there'll be consequences." She finally said, stepping back over to where her purse lay on the couch.

"Quit trying to blackmail me, it's not going to work." I spat, "If that's all you wanted to say, you can leave."

"You're right. I could leave." She agreed as she pulled her purse up, zipping it open. "I could leave here and act like this conversation never happened, letting you sit and be so paranoid that something's going to happen. And nothing could ever happen, and I could just be playing you along like a little puppet." She dug around for a bit, her eyes never leaving mine.

It was kind of creepy, but I definitely wasn't going to let her see any type of emotion. I just kept the same bored expression I had around almost everyone, waiting for her to finish her monologue.

"Or I could leave, and go tell everyone all of Rory's deepest darkest secrets." She pulled a small little book from the bag, dropping her purse back on the couch.

My arms fell to my sides, my blood running cold as I saw a giant 'A' written on the front. "That could be yours, both of your names start with A." I pointed out, clearing my throat.

"Hmm, true." She flipped open the book, "'Dear Diary, today I caught Paige making out with Asher. Asher, of all people!" She exclaimed, reading from one of the middle pages. "After all those things she told me, the way he made me feel, it was all a lie. Why do I have to go through so much pain when everyone else is fine-'"

"Stop!" I exclaimed, stepping forward.

"Oh! How about the most recent one, yeah?" She flipped further into the book, almost to the end. "'Dear Diary, things with Carter have been amazing, but I'm confused. He's yet to ask me to be his girlfriend, and I don't know if it's something wrong with me or if he's waiting for me to ask him. Should I just ask him and stop being such a scaredy cat?'"

"Ashley, stop," I warned. I didn't want to hear anymore. This was something Rory didn't want anyone to know - clearly. How did she even get this? "How did you get that?" I asked my thoughts out loud.

"You know, I wondered the same after I so easily got into her room under her mother's supervision." She shut the book, "But then after getting a good hour's worth of reading, Vivienne Holland is kind of a shitty mom."

"What? So you just want me to dump Rory to get some sick satisfaction, and if I don't, you-you're just going to read her diary to the whole world?" I asked, waving my hand around.

"Maybe, maybe not. Are you willing to listen now?" She asked, tapping her fingers along the leather book. "Cause if not, if you've really heard enough, I'll just go upload these to every social media platform you can think of. Little Miss Innocent Aurora Holland will be more than just a new piece of meat. She'll be-"

"What do you want, Ashley?" I cut her off. "You already bully the shit out of her, you really think threatening me by bullying her some more will make me ignore her?"

"You're right, maybe I'm a little delusional." She shrugged, shoving the journal back into her purse. "Or maybe I'm just smart. You think I've made Rory's life a living hell yet? You just wait. Once her journal's posted everywhere, the rumors will get worse. The bullying by my friends and yours will get worse, and she'll never want to show her face in Riverway High again."

"So what, I just treat her like shit and make her sad so-so you can gloat about the power you have in the school? I don't get it." I shook my head, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Oh, Carter." She stepped forward with a pout. "Poor little innocent Carter. You really think that was it? No, you don't just dump her and go on with your life. You-" She stopped directly in front of me, pressing her finger to my chest. "You're going to get back with me."

"What? Are you crazy?!" I exclaimed, stepping back. I hit the wall, my breathing growing heavy as Ashley smiled.

"What, you don't like the idea of us getting back together? I thought it'd be sweet... romantic even." She stepped back, examining her nails. "Your choice. But Aurora Holland's fate will be up to you. If you really don't like the idea, her journal will be spread out for everyone to see in about an hour, and her life at Riverway High will be changed forever, all because you're too selfish to let her have a happy life."

It was silent as she stepped back to where her purse was, picking it up.

The last thing I want to do is be selfish. I've already been selfish enough when it comes to Rory, and she has such a hard life that I know if Ashley were to actively do any of this - I don't know what would happen. The entire world knowing Rory's personal life, her secrets, the small moments shared between us... I can't.

Ashley approached the door, but just as her hand reached the doorknob, I stopped her. "Don't," I whispered. "Don't ruin Rory's life, please."

"It's up to you, Carter Jackson." She shrugged, "I've been holding back, I really have. But after seeing that time wasn't on my side, I just needed to take matters into my own hands. You think James messing with her was bad? Wait till he hears the rumor that she wants to sleep with him."

"James better not go anywhere near her," I threatened, my jaw clenching at just the thought.

"Like I said, her future's in your hands. You want Rory safe? You come back to where you're supposed to be. With me." She smirked, "I give you till Friday to end whatever childish fling is going on, and if you don't, you know what happens."

"If I do this... Rory's completely safe?" I asked. "No bullying from you or any of your little minions. Nothing from James, nobody touches her? I won't agree unless this all stops completely."

"You have my word, Carter. I don't give two shits about Aurora Holland." She turned the doorknob, the daylight spreading in as she opened the door. "All I care about is things going back to how they used to be. With me and you. If you're mine - fully mine, I'll leave her alone just like the rest of the losers of Riverway High."

I didn't say anything, weighing my options. It's either ignore Ashley and see what she's really capable of - which is a lot. Or I break Rory's heart just like I promised I wouldn't.

It's either I hurt her and keep her safe, safe from everything she's had to deal with the last few months, plus whatever else Ashley has planned. Or I continue to stay selfish and I stay with her, only being able to protect her from so much.

She deserves better.

"Friday," Ashley said again after I didn't say anything. She disappeared after that, probably off to gloat to her friends about how she's won.

If I can just get her journal back, and I can make sure there are no extra copies of it anywhere - Ashley doesn't have any leverage over me. She can't hurt Rory, not more than she already has.

My chest hurts with a pain I've never felt before. I haven't even done anything, I haven't even seen Rory. How am I going to hurt her?

Tears filled my eyes as I thought about how to end things in the calmest way possible. I only have a few days, and knowing Ashley, if I don't do it by midnight Frida,y the journal will be posted everywhere.

Sure, everything Ashley mentioned to me I already knew about - well, minus Rory wanting me to ask her to be my girlfriend - but that doesn't mean everyone else knows. Plus, there are probably things in there I don't even know, not to mention everyone else.

My fists clenched at my sides, my options little to none. Either way, Rory was going to be heartbroken, and I hate that either way, it'll be because of me.

The door swung open, and I shot back, worried for a second that Ashley had come back to change her mind. To tell me that it doesn't matter my choice, that she's going to make Rory's life a living hell, and the journal's being uploaded right now as we speak.

My heart calmed to see that it was just Logan, and for once in my life, I was relieved to see him. He stopped in his tracks to see me standing there, his dark brows bunched together. "You good? You look like you've been crying."

No. "Yeah, I'm good." I muttered, "See you later."

I didn't wait for a response as I booked it up the stairs and toward my room, shutting and locking the door behind me.

I'm in dire need of a miracle right now.