A/N Second last chapter rollercoaster time :)

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?" Alex snapped, storming towards her furiously.
"The fuck are you talking about?" Maria hissed, standing up slowly from the dining table to match Alex's height in her heels aggressively.
"What do you fucking think I'm talking about?" Alex roared, stomping his foot and throwing his hands up, his anger finished bubbling, completely erupting through his mouth. "You fucked my fiancé!"

"Alexander!" Eliza hissed, speed walking in to come to Maria's defence, hastily stepping up beside her.
"No! No I have a right to be pissed! John was- he- you did this to him!" Alex struggled to find the right words for once in his life, flailing his hands around in frustration.
"Maria has done nothing wrong!" Eliza shot back, grabbing her arm and holding her protectively.
"She raped-" Alex began to roar before Maria abruptly cut him.
"Did John tell you that?"

Alex shut up, biting the insides of his cheeks until the unmistakable metallic taste of blood met his senses.
"Go on Alex, did John tell you that? Or are you assuming shit?" She hissed. "He. Gave. Consent."

"N-no-" Alex murmured in disbelief, stepping back a little, shaking his head furiously. "No he wouldn't-"
"Well he did! Do you think after years of being handed off and raped I'd turn and do it to someone else? I'll admit- I may have pressured him into it, but he said yes, and he helped me out, he really did," her voice softened gradually to a delicate chime, her fists softening out of their grip as well.
"What did you want out of it? The kid? Because congratu-fucking-lations, you've got it and John is terrified." Alex hissed still in defence, at this early hour of the morning attracting a few more familiar faces from around the boat.

"I don't want it," Maria scoffed matter-of-factly. "Honestly Alexander, me? With a child? You're kidding." She laughed bitterly, flicking her hair to the side sassily. "You and John can have the kid, there, happy family." Alex clenched his teeth, his fists shaking either side of him.
"So why'd you do it? To spite me? For your own pleasure? To scare-"
"To keep myself from having a fucking panic attack, maybe?" Maria cut in with a sneer. "Oh wow surprise surprise Alexander- you're not the only person with fucking issues!" She screamed, Eliza yanking her back in surprise.

"Shut up!" John's voice snapped from behind Alex, his breathing heavy with wide, glossy doe eyes, tears threatening to spill down his freckle speckled cheeks. "Alex leave her alone, and Maria don't you dare address my fiancé with that tone," he growled, walking up and grabbing Alex's arm, trying to push him back, but failing as Alex stood his ground. Alex opened his mouth to speak again but John shot him a look of warning. He shifted his gaze towards Maria, his anger softening into remorse. "Why didn't you tell me at least?"

"I only found out at the pharmacy- I'm sorry, John, I'm sorry to put you in this position, and Alex I'm... sorry to you too, but I want you guys to take the kid. Can we please just- just not have this conversation until closer to the time? We still have much bigger things to worry about okay," Maria sighed, Eliza by her side squeezing her hand reassuringly.
Alex huffed and spun around, storming off bitterly.
"Whatever,"

"Alexander you're a grown man not a moody fucking teen get your ass back over here and apologise!" Eliza snapped, Alex flipping her off with both hands and making his way up to the top deck without any hesitation.
John's eyes widened and he bit his lip cautiously.
"S-sorry- I'll go talk to him,"

By the time John had made it up to the top deck Alex was hunched over on one of the lounge chairs, a notepad pressed against his thighs and a pen whipping away at the page scrawling letters and words and sentences and paragraphs and paragraphs upon paragraphs of god knows what. John drew in a slow breath before walking over, taking a seat beside Alex, his legs crossed and his body turned to face him.
"Whatcha' writing?" He murmured softly, watching his expression intently.
"A letter," Alex mumbled grouchily, his eyes flickering away from the page only to briefly glance at John before being directed back at the paper. "What about it?"

"Who's it for?" John spoke softly, not taking his eyes off Alex still, reaching over to carefully brush Alex's hair back.
"Fucking- hmf Maria," he mumbled with a scoff, continuing to write like there was no tomorrow.
"Maria? What's the letter about?" John asked with a slight squint, unsure whether it was a positive or negative outlet.
"Nothing that matters," he hissed snappily, shocking John a little.

John pulled his hand back, placing it in his lap and shifting his gaze down, Alex noticing and sighing, finally putting the pen down.
"Look, I'm sorry, but you can see why I'm angry right? Right? You'd be angry if you found out I fucked Eliza right? I mean at least we didn't go that far-" Alex huffed, suddenly pausing as guilt swelled in his stomach. John squinted at Alex skeptically, sitting up a little so he was just taller.
"How far did you go Alex?" John murmured with an acidic tone, Alex clenching his pen with an iron grip of anxiousness.

"It was just a kiss," Alex muttered quietly.
"Don't lie to me Alexander." John murmured dangerously low, Alex knowing he was in deep shit now.
"Twokissesokay. I kissed her twice. One was to protect her, the other was... spontaneous,"

John scoffed and stood up from his seat, turning and walking away without another word.
"John what the fuck? You fucked another perso- a woman, and yet you're mad at me for two kisses?" Alex stood up after him, dropping the notebook to the seat behind him.
"No, Alex, it's the part where I don't find out until after you're already the villain- oh look I'm Alex I've made everyone mad and I have nothing else to loose so I may as well tell John now," John started to take slow steps back towards Alex, his cheeks flushed with frustration.
"That's not what it's like! When else would I tell you? Whe- a-across the dinner table? Oh yes Eliza this pasta is lovely, speaking of Eliza- John did you know we kissed? Haha no, you were too busy fucking Maria Reynolds!"

Alex instantly regretted it after he'd said it. Watching John's face fall, and knowing he caused it, made him shatter.
"John I-"
"No, no you have nothing else to say to me." John growled, turning and walking back to the stairs hastily.
"But-"
"Why don't you write me a fucking letter? Does that make it easier for you? Maybe if you get to proof read it you won't say stupid shit, or you will, most of what you say is,"

John disappeared down the stairs and Alex fell back into his seat, caving in immediately. He kicked the seat, again, and again, growling and exclaiming a string of colourful language before picking the notepad back up and continuing to write. He sure as fuck would write John a letter.

---

"What's this?" John muttered as Alex dropped a piece of paper on the bed beside him.
"Your stupid letter. I gave Maria hers." He mumbled, crossing his arms where he stood.
"I was being sarcastic-"
"Just read it."

John rolled his eyes and snatched up the paper, lifting it to eye level and beginning to read with a bored expression.
Cold in my professions, warm in my friendships, I wish, my Dear-

"Writing me a love letter won't solve anything. I know you love me." John muttered, lowering the letter to shoot John a skeptical expression.
"But exactly- that's it, I love you. I love you and I would never do anything to hurt you, and I know you're the same, y-you- you wouldn't hurt me," Alex forced a smile as he took a seat on the edge of the bed slowly.
"I shouldn't get special privileges just because you love me though," John frowned, sitting up a little.
"Of course you should," Alex snickered matter-of-factly.

"Okay in that case, just because you don't love Maria too doesn't mean you get to be a bitch to her," John frowned, folding the letter for later. Alex sighed through his nose, chewing on the inside of his cheek.
"Her letter was an apology, I- things are being sorted out," he murmured. "But still..."
"No there is no 'but still' Lex, she's human and she's just as broken as the rest of us," John muttered delicately, shifting his gaze down to the duvet.

Alex sighed and crawled forward slowly, sitting beside John.
"We're all just a little fucked up aren't we?" He mumbled, glancing up at John.
"It's only natural," John gave Alex a small smile, Alex leaning up to test the waters, gently pecking John's lips.

John froze for a moment, staring down at the duvet until he couldn't hold back any longer and cracked a smile, surging forward to kiss Alex passionately.
"I love you," Alex murmured against John's lips with a smile, raising a hand to hold his jaw.
"I know,"

---

9 months later
Sallanches Hospital, Sallanches, France

"It was a half hour drive from Chamonix, this is ridiculous," Eliza huffed, tapping her foot impatiently on the waiting room's thin linoleum tiles.
"We should've left earlier," Alex huffed, raking a hand back through his hair.
"We couldn't leave earlier, how were we meant to know she was about to give birth?" Eliza hissed, throwing her hands up. She heard the door open and her head bolted over, praying for a doctor.

"Lafayette," John smiled, walking over to the door and pulling him into a hug. "Where's Herc?"
"On his way, he could not get out of work when you called, I just took the motorbike," Lafayette sighed with a weak smile before making his way over to Eliza. "How was she doing?" He spoke softly, his accent smooth and melodic, which Eliza needed in her panicked state.

"When we were driving here? In a lot of pain." Eliza frowned, squeezing Lafayette's hands. Lafayette clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth and pulled Eliza into his arms, right as the door swung open again.
"Elizabeth Schuyler?"

Eliza snapped out of Lafayette's embrace and was by the door in an instant, being lead out of the room by the doctor. Alex and John shot each other a nervous glance, Lafayette grabbing them both by the arms and shoving them down into chairs.
"Stop stressing, it is fine, you cannot worry that Maria just wants a hand to hold during this," Lafayette smiled reassuringly, John nodding and resting his head on Alex's shoulder, Alex grabbing his hand.
"You're right, you're right," Alex murmured in a jittery fashion.

"Have you got a name yet? Or is Maria doing it?" Lafayette smiled, taking a seat across from the boys.
"I think Maria said she was," Alex murmured, glancing at John skeptically.
"We have options either way," John grinned, looking back at Lafayette with a firm nod.

Soon a doctor came walking in, the three men shooting up to their feet. When they examined his solemn expression everyone's stomaches began to swirl with dread.
"Alexander Hamilton, John Laurens?" He questioned, both boys glancing at Lafayette, who shot them a weak smile of reassurance, before stepping forward. "Follow me," he sighed, stepping out into the hallway. The boys followed, gripping each other's hands for dear life.

"Do you want the good news, or the bad news first?" He murmured, glancing between the two and holding his clipboard up against his chest.
"Bad. Bad news." John immediately piped, wanting it over and done with.

The doctor nodded and drew in a slow breath, shifting his gaze down to his clipboard as he spoke.
"I regret to inform you that Miss Reynolds did not make it through the procedure,"

Alex slowly raised a hand to his mouth, his stomach dropping to his toes. He felt sick. He heard John choke back a sob beside him and instantly turned to wrap his arms around him, holding him close with a shaky sigh. The doctor gave them a minute just to hold each other, Alex rubbing John's back slowly in a rhythmic pattern.
"Can we have the good news?" John murmured weakly, his face still hidden in Alex's shoulder.

The doctor shot them a patient smile and nodded, leading the boys down the hall with a nod.
"Crib C, meet your baby daughter," he smiled, pointing through a glass window into the nursery at the third crib down with a blank pink tag.

Now Alex joined in on the tears, smiling uncontrollably as he gazed through the glass with a small laugh at the tiny infant wrapped in a pink blanket, squirming slightly in her sleep. He wrapped his arm around John who returned his gesture, holding him close and leaning down to peck his cheek happily.
"She's gorgeous," John cooed with a smile, Alex beaming as he reached up to wipe the tears from John's cheeks.
"She sure is," Alex grinned, suddenly feeling another hand touch his shoulder.

Eliza stood beside him with a sad smile and glossy eyes.
"She's got John and Maria's curls," she added with a bright smile, Alex pulling her into a hug before John joined in.
"I'm so sorry," Alex whispered.
"Let's not talk about it now, you've got a little girl who still needs a name," Eliza smiled warmly as she pulled away, her hands shaking a little.

"Maria didn't name her?" John murmured in surprise, Eliza still smiling and closing her eyes, shaking her head slowly.
"It's on you boys,"
Alex and John immediately looked at each other with a gaze of knowing, as if they were communicating telepathically with the exact name they wanted.
"That one?" Alex smiled.
"That one." John nodded with a smile. Alex turned to Eliza and the doctor, his smile as bright as the sun.

"Peggy."