"Are you even listening to me?" I sighed.

You would think that my husband would care a little more but it's ok.

"Y/N I have some work to do just- leave me alone for a little bit," Levi waved me off his eyes trained on something or someone across the room.

Right 'work' all that HARD work you have to do in the cafeteria surrounded by thousands of people.

Not to mention her

God why did you have to remind me?

"Ok then get some rest at least you start filming tomorrow!" I shot him a weak smile waving a quick goodbye to the other people at the table.

As if he'll actually do that he's a workaholic.

"Yeah whatever," Levi muttered in response waving me off.

Why do I even try?

"Mrs. Ackerman did he at least talk to you today?" Eren my driver asked opening the car door.

Not really.

"Eren you know how much I hate that name," I furrowed my brows stepping into the backseat.

"You're avoiding my question- did you two talk about it?" He repeated starting up the car.

Absolutely not.

"No and I don't want to talk about it any longer just take me home," I closed my eyes the black leather interior mixing with the inky darkness of the night.

Cute imagery.

Aw thank you!

Its rlly np!!!

One Year Prior

"Levi meet Y/N," my father gestured at me glancing in between the two of us.

Oh absolutely not.

"How many times do I have to tell you?! I want absolutely nothing to do with any of these stuck up assholes!" I lashed out standing up from my seat.

I don't want to live like this.

"Look Y/N you need this- we need this!" My mother begged dashing into the room, grabbing onto my hand.

You want this.

"Give him a chance I promise he's different!" My father protested giving Levi a reassuring pat on the back before quickly leaving the room along with my mother.

You're horrible.

"For a family about to go bankrupt you're living nicely," he chuckled dryly taking a look around the room.

Bankrupt?

"What do you mean?" I asked sitting back down.

There's absolutely no way.

"Do you ever get out of the house?" He pulled out a phone messing around for a few seconds before passing it to me.

Do I look like I get out of the house?

"Tell you what if we both go along with what your parents want and get married I'll let you do whatever you want- we don't even have to see each other." Levi proposed leaning closer to him.

Really?

"Ok I'll do it," I nodded at him extending my hand.

And that's how this began.

Present

I drifted off nodding occasionally feigning interest in whatever Eren was going on about.

The first two months of our 'marriage' had been just fine- I really didn't care for him but he took me out to eat and bought me nice clothes.

It wasn't really until the fourth month of living with him that I started to-

-like him. He was kind really too kind of course this marriage was just an act there had never been any real feeling behind it. It wasn't like I could really show it up- god no- it has to be kept low key because he was a celebrity.

I wondered for awhile if I was married to him because his parents made him or if I was married to him so everyone would turn a blind eye to whatever the fuck he was doing with Eren.

Obviously nothing after five months of living with him I learned that Eren could be really annoying and Levi had absolutely no patience for that.

But I guess at five months- when he had to go away for three weeks to film on location- that's when it really hit me.

He had left so many times before and never sent me a text or bothered to ask someone to check in on me.

It has never phased me- why should he have to care about me anyway.

This time it stung.

Ached, itched, pinched- whatever I was uncomfortable and upset.

At six months half a year into our marriage we had to go see his parents- his mom. She's a nice person but so easily fooled.

I can't really fault her though I was to.

That whole dinner he was so charming completely different from his usual indiferent self.

Flirtatious looks- lord he held my hand the entire time when I hugged his mom goodbye she whispered something to me.

'Ive never seen him so in love I can't wait for my grandchildren!'

I was smiling like an idiot the whole way home.

Of course I bragged a bit to my friends about how charming my husband was.

I think he saw me smiling and decided I was too happy- he was twice as cold when we got home.

The gifts and cute dinner dates had slowly stopped.

But at that dinner all of his little acts of kindness felt so genuine I fell victim to his stupid act.

I fell hard.

A simple goodnight would've been nice- but no he moved his stuff to the guest room and started sleeping there.

By month nine he had been away on several extended trips to go 'film' I could tell though from his attitude at home that that wasn't the case.

It's not like I could force him to love me- we both decided to do this out of convenience.

And it wasn't like he hadn't been keeping up with his end of the deal- I was free, I was rich- I had everything I wanted except him.

Maybe it is his fault for giving me absolutely everything at first.

Maybe.

Month ten came and went in the sameway as all the others.

By month eleven I decided to go to his work.

I really think he started to resent me at this point- up until now I hadn't interfered with his work at all.

I was just something he left at home something he could easily escape from.

And of course I saw her.

A girl who was everything I wasn't.

Physically she looked innocent and young.

I had aged, I was so tired and it showed.

I brushed it off- he must like her for more than just that.

So- I got to know her his adorable little friend at work.

I had absolutely no intention of hurting her- she was nice even to me.

I couldn't stop myself from liking her.

Where I was bitter and possessive she was sweet and open minded.

She was reassuring, comforting, young, and gorgeous.

I didn't mean to become attached to her either but I did and we became close.

'Oh Y/N I have to introduce you to Levi he's so charming!' She would gush over breakfast, and lunch, and dinner.

I wish.

Eventually she told him about me.

And that was the start of month 12- the present.

Fighting.

He came home one night drunk and angry.

I could smell the alcohol in his breath and I could see her on his skin.

I felt like puking.

Of course that was an overreaction.

I still felt disgusting.

He said a lot of things that night- no he did a lot of things that night.

What he really wanted to say to me was to stay away from her- to stop ruining her for him.

So I stopped.

I don't know why I just did.

Maybe it was because he had been so nice to me in the past.

Maybe.

Still-

-I shouldn't of agreed to cut ties with her in the first place.

Thinking back even though I lied to her about a bunch of things she was probably one of the best people in my life.

But because I went along with Levi- because some portion of my heart still beat for him I ended up like this.

"Mrs. Y/N we're home I'll tell the cooks to start working on dinner," Eren glanced back at me in the rearview mirror.

Would I do it all over again?

I hate myself.

Would you?

Would I?

I think I would.

No matter how much it hurts no matter what he does to me.

I always come back to this.

I think there's a word for that.

Probably.

Probably.

Anyway I think I'm going to bed now I don't really want to think about this or anything for a long time.

Ok goodnight.

Goodnight see you-

I don't think we'll be seeing each other again.

You're right goodnight- goodnight for a long time.

________

OK IM TIRERD DHJHDSHD GNNNN

-AAIAIIA