I took a deep breath. I looked at Nick who nodded his head.

"Dad?" My father looked up at me from the kitchen table. "I need to borrow the truck."

He raised a brow. "Why's that?"

"I'm going to a friend's house," I lied.

His eyes widened. "Really? I mean— wow, that's great! Who is she? Or he?"

Oh god.

"It's a she," I lied again. Nick snorted. "It's Emily St. Clair from my Chemistry class."

He furrowed his brows. "Never heard of them. Maybe I should go with you, meet her parents."

"No! No!" I shook my hands. "I lied, we're not friends. We were partnered up by Ms. Leslie. I don't want to give her an excuse to make fun of me more."

He sighed rubbing his temples. "Good god Eva, you don't have to be embarrassed of me. I'm your father, I should know what's going on in your life."

"I wouldn't make a difference," I shrugged my shoulders. "I'll be fine, really. I just want the truck for a quick escape if I need one."

"Fine," he sighed pulling out his keys from his pocket. "Don't stay too late. If she gives you a hard time let me know, I'll beat up her dad for you."

This made me laugh. Nick let out a breath of air. "Thank god he liked me."

"It's fine dad, no need to beat up anyone, I'm a big girl I can handle my own problems," I assured him.

He smiled softly. "You'll always be my little girl."

I hugged him before kissing the top of his head. "Love you."

"Love you too kiddo."

I grabbed the keys and left with Nick in tow. We didn't discuss last night. He didn't seem phased by any of it, I shouldn't be either. Or I should at the very least not show it. Not show Nick that I was developing feelings for him.

I got into the driver seat and took a big breath. "Okay, wow, haven't done this in months."

"Ah crap, you really going to kill me twice Montgomery?" Nick said from the passenger seat.

"Shut up Leighton, can't you see I'm a nervous wreck?" I heaved. "Don't stereotype me."

With that I put the car in reverse looking at all the mirrors frantically. I made it out of the driveway and on to the road. Wow! I did it! I still remembered!

"Not bad Eva," Nick nodded proudly.

I drove to the road that leads to the highway. "Where am I driving exactly?"

Nick shook his head? Eyes focused on the road. "Not sure, just until something triggers my memory."

Well okay then.

I kept driving.

"Anything yet?"

"I don't know. I can't fucking remember anything," he seethed. God, he was angry.

"Hey, it's fine," I tried soothing him.

"No Eva, it's not fine. It's not ever going to be fine. I died and I have no idea how or why," he yelled.

My whole body stiffened.

"I'm sorry Eva..." he sighed.

"I get it Nick. Your short life sucked. Your afterlife sucks. But you don't get the right to take it out on me," I scorned him. "Not after everything."

He buried his face in his hands and let out a loud groan. "I'm such an idiot. I keep asking for your forgiveness and I do stupid shit like this."

"Again, I get it. Not having control over your life sucks," I told him. "But were gonna find out what happened to you."

He peeked up from his hands, a sad look on his face. "I don't deserve you."

I laughed. "That's an understatement. Now, eyes on the road."

We kept driving looking for something, anything. I saw something that was familiar to me.

"Hey, isn't that—"

"Yeah it is," Nick nodded.

I started beeping at the car as it got closer.

"What are you doing?!"

"We need clues!"

Trey pulled up beside my car on the empty road looking angry. "What the fu— Eva? What's going on?"

"Get out the car," I told him.

"Jesus Eva, what are you doing?" Nick hissed.

Trey looked hesitant before going to meet me between our cars.

"Where were you?" I asked him.

"Way to be subtle," huffed Nick.

Trey slumped against his car and slid to the ground. He let out a groan before running a hand through his hair. "It's all my fault."

I held back a gasp. He just drove back from the possible murder sight and just confessed. Should I be running?

"The day Nick went missing we had an argument. He didn't want to stay in the car. He told me to stop in the middle of the road and he got out and began walking. I should have forced him to stay in the car. Tried to fix the stupid fight. Should have realized something was wrong when I texted him that night and he didn't answer. I didn't really notice what was wrong until I went to pick him up for school only to have his mom tell me he never came home last night."

I sat beside him, patting his knee lightly. "You can't blame yourself."

"I keep thinking what if--"

"Trey, you need to stop. Thinking thoughts like this will get you no where."

"That's why I'm here. The lake they found his shoe in is down there. I go any time I can to try and find any clues as to what happened to my brother. I keep thinking that I should find something the cops missed, that there's no one on that force that would know him better than I do. God, look at me rambling to you."

Nick rolled his eyes. "Brothers my ass. The asshole stole my girlfriend."

I wanted to scorn him, but I had an audience.

"And do you? Have any clues?" I asked.

Trey narrowed his brows. "Why would you ask? Why are you here? Why are you being nice to me?"

Oh god, here we go again.

"Don't tell him! Lie!" Nick warned.

Me looking around the crime scene makes me look guilty. Maybe I should stay on the safer side.

"I--um, I'm playing Pokemon Go," I said, pulling out my phone and waving it to sell it. Nick snorted from beside me. I quickly tried to divert it back to Trey. "Plus, you look like you've been bottling things up and I feel kinda bad for you. Not all of us are assholes."

Trey nodded. "Right... I'm sorry about that. I know we've never been nice to you and here you are listening to my problems. Nick was really focused on making your life horrible. He always pressured me into it, I never really liked it. Now that he's gone, I'm trying to right my wrongs. Will you let me?"

Nick threw his hands in the air. "This fucking liar—"

"Of course, I'd like that," I smiled. I would like that a lot.

"Great. That's really great," Trey finally smiled. He stood up and dusted his pants. "See you around Montgomery."

I stood up too and waved as Trey sped off. I finally dared peak at Nick who was seething in anger.

"What a dick!"

I made my way back to the driver's seat.

"He's your friend Nick, he cares for you," I tried to reason with him. Nick only hated him because he took his football captain title and his girlfriend.

"Are you really buying this whole 'I was innocent this whole time' act?" He asked.

Trey sounded like he was being ripped apart internally. I could see his regret much like Nick's.

I shrugged. "I don't know, you tell me?"

Nick gave me a pointed look. "I was the one who felt pressured. Trey asked me every morning whether you left the house or not so we could follow you. He liked the power, he has always liked the power."

It sounded a lot like Nick in my opinion. "And you didn't?"

"You don't believe me," Nick looked hurt.

"All I'm saying is that it sounds a lot like someone else."

"Jesus Eva! Why would I lie to you? It's not like it would change anything," he said.

"But it does change everything," I stated.

Nick didn't respond. In fact, he didn't even look at me. Instead, he crossed his arms and looked out the window. Fine! Be that way!

I kept driving. Now we were on a dirt road surrounded by trees. I was driving to the lake.

"Anything?" I asked again.

Nick shook his head before his eyes widened. "Wait— I remember a number."

"A number? Can you be more specific?"

He dug his fingers into his hair. "I can't remember! It's so blurry!"

"Hey," I reached over grabbing his thigh and giving it a light squeeze. "Doesn't matter how long it takes, we'll figure it out."

Very slowly, Nick's hand came down and clasped mine. My whole body felt warm.

"I—um— why don't we go down and look on foot closer to the lake?" I asked, more like stuttered. God, I was a mess.

Nick nodded. "Sure, we'll try that."

I parked the car on the side of the road. I began walking towards the lake. "You think I'll get fined for trespassing?"

This area was filled with nice lake homes.

"Knowing these rich folks, they probably have some motion sensors or some shit," Nick said with a snort.

We kept walking waiting for Nick to remember something.

"Was the number a license plate, a sweater, an address?" I tried triggering his memory.

"I. Don't. Know."

"Okay spill," I stopped in my spot. "You've been in a mood all day."

"I haven't—"

"Bullshit. What happened to the hopeful "I'm gonna move on to heaven!" Or "We will figure out what happened together!" Where's that guy?" I asked. This depressive downer was not the Nick I know.

"That guy? Are you serious?"

"Yes, I am. The Nick I know doesn't give up, whether it's pissing me off or playing football, he does not give up," I emphasized.

He was boiling. With his clenched at his sides in fists, Nick made his way towards me. "You want to know what's wrong?" He got closer. Our toes were almost touching. He tilted his head down so we were eye to eye, burning me with his gaze. "Every day passes and I realize that there are so many things I want that I never thought I did want until I realized I can't have them. At this point I just want to move on to make that trouble go away, so don't judge me for losing hope."

"What can there possibly be to make you lose that hope Nick?" My voice was low, almost a whisper. What can break him so?

He just stared at me. His eyes darted from my eyes to my lips then back to my eyes. He shook his head and took a step back. "It doesn't matter. Let's just go back."

"Nick—"

He put a hand out as if to stop me. "Please don't. I just want to go back."

I let out a loud sigh. "Okay. Fine."

Once again, we welcomed silence.

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