I held my breath for who knew how long. Refusing to move from where I was standing, I tried my best not to be shaken because a boy was just an inch or two away from my face. In a normal case scenario, I'd think that I was going to be kissed, but this was the opposite of such normal case scenarios.

Right now, how I wished I had studied the way the opposite gender's minds worked before coming here. Because seriously, I did not know what was going on, and why this boy was on my face. And really, I was the only one freaking out. This boy was so composed, as if he had been doing this all his life. Take note, he did it with his face right on whoever he was staring at.

Literally.

'They'd sniff you and they will know,' I heard Paige's voice echo in my head. For the first time, I welcomed the thought. What if she was right? What if they had already found out? But I hadn't even done a thing. I hadn't said a single word yet.

So instead, I'd rather believe that every newcomer must undergo something like this, with this boy looking closely at your face and taking in every single bit of you. Even his breath started tickling my skin. I had already forgotten to breathe, focusing only on not collapsing to the ground—because that would be embarrassing. Risky. Very dangerous. I couldn't lose consciousness now.

After looking closely at all of my features, his eyes landed directly on mine. I felt a hefty load dropped on my shoulders in return. This was some bloody torture. Tears were already touching the corners of my eyes.

I was so busted now. He already knew. This boy had sniffed me, and he instantly knew that I was a girl. And the ridiculous thing was, he wasn't looking away. Not in the least. Surely, since he was already aware of what I was, he should now take his face off mine and maybe make some announcement to the group.

'Boys, we have a girl in our midst. Arrest her!'

But he continued holding me in the eyes, as if telling me, 'I know you're a girl. You can't escape your cruel fate. I've sniffed you! You smell like one. And guess what? You will never know who your brother is. Your dad will lose his job tomorrow. There's no deliverance for your family. Mwuahahaha!'

I was getting insane by the minute, thinking that he was some super villain in this story. It must be those lucent eyes that drove me crazy. And speaking of his eyes, I might as well take in his features. I should at least remember this weirdo's face.

I wanted to hold a grudge.

First, the nearest to my face was his black hair, which was a bit wavy and had the shade like those of the midnight skies. His eyes almost had the same shade as well, only lighter. Okay, that was an interesting match-up. He was tall and had to lean down in order to study me. And also, he smelled good, like the fresh scent of evergreen, if that even made any sense. At least that was a good thing. Imagine if he had leaned close and smelled like crap.

Oh, and did I mention he was so into it? The staring. Right. He wasn't even showing any signs of backing down. Instead, it was I who instantly cut off our momentary eye contact, because it felt weird.

Should I back off a little? The last thing I wanted to happen, next to some random boy studying my face this closely, was for the rest of the population of this room to find out that I was a girl—if they hadn't yet!

But seriously, maybe I should really do something. Thinking that I should start by speaking, I carefully said with the manly voice that I'd practiced for the last few hours, "Is there something wrong with my face?"

As soon as I said those words, chairs moved back, everyone around us became animated, and they started talking to each other. All right, so they weren't just pieces of decorations placed around this hall. They were real and breathing and alive and men. I heard echoes of their words, but I wasn't able to understand anything, since they were still several feet away from where we were standing.

One of them approached us. Was he going to stare at me, too? I swore, if someone else would join this creep, I'd probably collapse to the floor. No questions asked. But gladly, he didn't do that. Instead, he pulled me back.

Maybe I could have moved back a moment ago. I wasn't informed, though. Nobody had told me that when a boy was looking at another boy so closely, the other one was entitled to move a step back, and the others wouldn't think of it as too feminine or anything. So that was the normal response?

"KN, you don't have to be that hard on him," the newcomer said. So that was his name—KN. I was so holding a grudge against him. If I could just find a paper and pen, I'd make sure that I got his name right. Last name, please? I wanted details.

"Just having a closer look. I forgot to wear my contacts," the one staring at me a moment ago said. Did he mean contact lenses for the eyes? He couldn't see me full well, and that was why he leaned in? Right? But, why? So much for the sudden thought of being kissed.

"Oh, right. Cool," shorty beside me replied evenly. He was a little taller than I was, but was definitely several inches shorter than this other boy in front of me, who was probably more or less six feet tall. "Don't give him a hard time. He seemed frightened by you."

"He's interesting," the other one called KN replied. Was that a compliment? Nope, not from some creepy guy. Interesting might as well be equal to the word suspicious.

"I bet he is," shorty said, clearing his throat. Then, looking at me, he added, "Why don't we introduce you to the group, huh?"

Quickly, shorty placed his right arm around my shoulder and dragged me forward. His laugh sounded off as we were walking away from the one called KN. What was that about? Was KN some kind of crook? Surely, shorty treated him like some delinquent.

I heard the one called KN laugh a bit, not really a cheerful laugh, but one that was like a smug remark to us. KN's leather shoes brushed the wooden floor again, making that thud, thud, thud sound. I didn't exactly see where he was heading to, but I was almost certain that he went towards the elevator. I heard a ding, before everything else in front of me became busy.

"So what's the name?" the one beside me asked, as we were getting near the waiting, and now friendly, group.

"Fi—" I paused, scolding myself. "I mean, Jules."

He didn't seem to hear what I had almost blurted out, much to my relief, and repeated, "Jules."

"Jules Kensey," I echoed back. I wanted to do a cartwheel for not being found out just yet. My plan was working, and the one called KN was the only one who was being weird. No one had sniffed me. Success!

"Jayden here," he said, nodding a bit that made his dark brown hair bounce. "Sorry if we purposely gave you a scare a while ago. We always do that, everyone gathering around and looking scary and see how the new one will react. But of course, we didn't expect KN to ruin it. Trust me, that was not part of the plan."

"It was not?" I asked.

"Hey!" One patted me on the back, hard. I almost choked. He said a name, I supposed, but I wasn't able to hear it, because I was busy catching back my breath.

"Ian," another one extended his hand to me.

I was still shaking his hand, but another one met mine instead. "Jacob."

"Jacob."

Then someone turned me around and grabbed my hand, pulling me in for a dude hug. "Max here, my man!"

"Nice to meet—"

Out of nowhere, a hand grabbed me from behind and held me by my right arm as he studied me closely. He got a black, wavy hair like the one called KN, but it was shorter by at least an inch. "Luke Walker! Cool name? Yes? Yours?"

"Jules," I muttered, feeling faint because boys were swaying me from all sides. This had never happened to me before. Of course, boys had touched me before in one way or two, a casual hug or hands brushing together, but not this way.

Not as if I was one of them. Slamming. Colliding. Feeling out of breath, very realistically.

I wanted to say that I felt violated, but I knew it wasn't the case. Regardless, I felt uncomfortable with all those pound hugs and handshakes. All the time, I was backing down half a step in order to prevent them from pressing themselves on my nonexistent chest.

"You look like a girl," someone called out from my right. Alarmed, I hurriedly turned in his direction. He laughed and added, "But, of course, you're not."

"Yeah... um... I'm not."

"Micah." He nodded, a strand of his blonde hair falling on his face.

"Jules," I said back.

"Daniel here, babe!" A loud voice echoed from somewhere. I looked at him, confused why he had called me as babe. He was a big man with short, kinky black hair and a brown complexion. Then he grinned and said, "Don't punch me for saying that. Ha!"

"Not at all," was my intelligent response. I did not know how to punch, and I didn't feel like punching, either.

Everything else continued spinning around as people threw me their names. I heard the name Jude being mentioned twice, and I had no idea who and who said so. Everyone introduced themselves one after the other, making me dizzy. I hadn't been able to remember a single name, aside from KN, who was already out of the chaotic picture. And, of course, there was Jayden. But except for the two, I hardly remembered anything else.

"Austin, at your service, if you want to look at a magnificent view," another one said to me, as I was regaining back my sanity. Tall. Fair skin. Luscious brown hair. Noticeable green eyes. True enough, he was saying the truth. He put his thumb below his chin and pushed his head up to let me get a clearer look at his face. Even when lightheaded and wobbly, I had to agree that he was really handsome.

Swoon.

"No one here's interested in your face, Aus," another one muttered, coming over to his side. He was as tall as the one called Austin. He got a brown hair as well, only of a darker shade. But unlike Austin, his eyes were deep blue. And more or less, he was also running the same league as his friend in terms of being handsome. He placed one hand on Austin's shoulder and extended the other one to me. "Christoffer."

"Hi," I greeted them both. "Jules."

"You have a cute face. No wonder KN fell for you," the one called Austin noted.

"KN?" I was surprised by what he said.

Austin came closer, and I ended up thinking that he'd kiss me, too. It was like a second instinct. But of course, he didn't. Instead, he whispered something in my ear, "He's gay."

"He's what?" I exclaimed.

"Shh," Austin hushed me.

I shut my mouth. After looking at him for a good three seconds, I couldn't help but ask again, "Really?"

"It's a secret. Right, Chris?" he asked for confirmation from the one called Christoffer.

"Don't go around saying that. It's just a rumor," Christoffer said, shaking his head in warning. "You don't want to annoy him. It's not a good idea."

I slowly nodded in response.

"Jules, how are you?" Someone slammed on me from the back.

Bombs away moment.

I swore, at the end of the night, I'd end up getting hundreds of bruises or lung failure. As I was still composing myself, I ended up tripping on a foot. That made me land on someone, before dragging that same person straight towards the ground with me.

"Sorry," I said, soothing my butt after I moved away from him. That was a major ouch. How rough could these guys be?

"Damage," he muttered.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing," he said, standing up on his feet. And then, he extended a hand to me and said, "Help?"

I nodded and took his hand. "Thanks."

"Good," he said another word again.

I straightened my clothes and thought that I might as well introduce myself. Introduction mood was so in the air. Shoving aside the thought that I might as well make a body slam, I kept it simple. "Jules. What's your name?"

Honestly, he didn't seem to be the type that would go for body slams. In fact, he looked like the opposite. And instead of saying his name, he repeated mine, "Jules."

When Paige was into jocks, I'd die to date a nerd. I couldn't explain the attraction I felt for them. I was so into people who were showing around their latest Star Wars collection or reading books I didn't even know exist.

But as something clicked inside my head, I shoved those admirations away. They needed to be cast away in the deepest sea or thrown into outer space. Because the thing was, he had the same shade of hair as my brother. So I stared at his face and studied him closely instead, like the way the creepy KN guy did a moment ago.

I pleaded for the sibling's recognition to kick in right away, wishing that this person was Finn. I also wanted to ask him bluntly if he was, but I couldn't risk it. Not now. That would put me in the spotlight. It also might scare Finn and make him disappear again. Of course, I didn't want that to happen.

As I was staring at him, he gave out a horrified shrug. "What?"

"Nothing!" I hurriedly replied.

"Okay," he said again, before picking up the book he'd dropped. I saw a name written on the side of his book: Grayson. It must be his, if not the fake name Finn was using. I eyed him suspiciously, putting him as my number one priority among the others I had to stalk for the next few days.

"Did someone just fart?" I heard someone ask loudly from behind me.

A stench smell filled the room. I instinctively covered my nose. Looking around as others pinpointed who had done such a crime, I realized I was holding my hand delicately over my nose, and all the others were just using their thumbs and forefingers or their shirt. I hurriedly pulled down my hand and kept it to my side, completely ignoring the hideous smell.

"You?" Nerdy clearly noticed.

I winced. Did he see it? I was like some runaway felon pronounced guilty. Turning my head to him, I nervously laughed. "What?"

He didn't answer, and just stared at me, closely.

Thinking that I should really shake this off, I defensively told him, "I'm not the one who farted!"

He squinted his eyes. Oh no, he wasn't talking about the fart. Did he notice the mistake I'd done?

What? What? What?

Finding my cool, I tried laughing again. "Why you are pushing the blame on me? Maybe because you were the one who..."

He seemed unshaken by my attempt to sound comical. Rather, he looked apprehensive about me. Then he shrugged his shoulders, simply saying, "Not me."

I was about to say something else to further cover up my mistake, but he alraedy turned his back on me and walked away. Not knowing what else to do, I just crossed my fingers.

On the first night with the boys, someone was already suspicious of me. And speaking about the first night, my mind got occupied with finding out the identity of my gay roommate. My soon to be best friend here. We would so relate. But I hoped he wasn't like KN. Having the thought of KN staring at me during my sleep, I shuddered.

"There you are!" Jayden said to me. "Are you having fun? Dinner will come around in about..."

He turned me towards the kitchen area at the far side of the room. Then, on the cue of three, I saw people emerging from inside, putting silver trays on the counter. In response, everyone flooded in front of the counter, asking for this and that. Loud. It was so loud as everyone began ordering their food.

"I thought you would be surprised," Jayden noted, laughing at my reaction.

"Is it always like this?" I asked. How would we ever get some food if everyone acted this way? It seemed like I had to wrestle for dinner during my stay here.

"Always," he affirmed. "So are you coming or are you full?"

"Hungry, but I'm not sure anymore," I replied, shaking my head.

"Figures," Jayden said.

"Hey, do you know who's Cosgrove?" I asked him about my roommate. I suddenly felt like calling it a night. Dad called him as Mr. Cosgrove. He said that he was harmless, because he was supposedly gay and I was actually a girl. That was why Dad had arranged for me to share a room with him instead of roommate no. 1, who was a well-known playboy.

"Cosgrove?"

"He's my roommate," I told him.

"Oh, that's bad," Jayden said with apprehension, looking oblivious suddenly, as if I'd turned the tables and surprised him instead.

"Why?"

"You just met him," Jayden slowly answered.

"Really?" Well, that made sense. I basically met everyone here a moment ago. It was just that I hadn't been able to memorize all of them.

Jayden nodded. "I feel bad for you. I first thought that you'd be sharing rooms with Daniel, since there were still two rooms available. But you know, you can always ask for a transfer tomorrow."

Ah, so Daniel was the playboy.

"Why?" I asked again, not really getting a word or two he said. Why would I want a transfer in the first place?

"You don't know his first name?"

I shook my head in response. My dad just kept on saying Mr. Cosgrove last night. He said, 'He's a good boy. Well-mannered. You'll be okay with him.'

Realizing that I had no clue, he exhaled. "It's Konstantino Nikolas."

"That's a cool name." It was catchy, even.

"You still don't...?" Jayden asked, obliviously.

"Oh, I got it. Konstantino Nikolas?" I repeated. Jayden still got that look on his face, like I'd missed something so obvious.

And then it hit me.

"KN," he confirmed my thoughts.

"Crap," I breathed. "Are you serious?"

"He is your roommate, all right. The thing is, no one wants to share a room with him, because he is just like that. You know, creepy. There's something wrong with that guy," Jayden said.

"So is Daniel okay? I mean, if I make arrangements for transfer, will he be cool with that or..." I was seriously considering that transfer now.

Jayden exhaled once more. "He's okay when he's awake, but there are some rumors that he sleep walks. So if you're his roommate, you'll feel obligated to drag him back to bed when you see him lying next to you or on the floor or even in the bathroom. It's tiresome to share rooms with him, I guess. He's a huge guy, as you can see."

I swallowed. That wasn't a good idea, either. Why did I have, like, only two options? Why?

And then an empty tray flew out of nowhere. It barely missed my entire head. The tray, I found out, came from those guys who got fed up with each other's jokes and got a bit worked up. Next moment, Jayden and I were avoiding plastic cups.

This would be a long night.

FINDING FINN JOURNAL NO. 4

My roommate is the creepiest guy in school. Great. Just great.