Chapter 36

I've got my iced coffee with me, so how bad can my first day be... right? But gosh, it was so hectic! Pagtapak ko pa lang sa office, inendorse na sa akin lahat ng pending cases na kailangan kong basahin kasi ako ang magrerecommend either may probable cause or for dismissal siya. So, that was my whole morning. Tapos mamaya, may schedule na ako na tatlong inquest. I was so excited but also, kinakabahan ako. Kasi ganito ba talaga sa prosecution? Wala man lang welcome—as in tinapon ako agad sa gitna ng labanan.

"What's up?" sabi ko nung makita ko na tumatawag siya. Normally, I wouldn't answer his call kasi personal call 'yon... but it's lunch break. Pagod na pagod ako. Gusto ko lang naman marinig iyong boses ng boyfriend ko.

"Have you eaten lunch?" he asked.

Natigilan ako. I was so busy that I forgot na hindi pa pala ako kumakain kung hindi pa tumawag sa akin si Lui nung lunch break.

"Thought so," he said nung hindi agad ako naka-sagot. "I'm ordering food for you."

"Wait, ngayon na?"

"Yes."

"Wag na," sabi ko sa kanya. "Aalis na rin ako in a while. May inquest proceeding ako. Bibili na lang ako ng sandwich on the way."

Ito iyong panahon na iniisip ko na sana ay naka-FaceTime kami kasi gusto kong makita iyong expression sa mukha ni Lui. Like naka-kunot ba iyong noo niya kasi pasaway ako? Nagwoworry ba siya kasi hindi pa kumakain iyong girlfriend niya? Gusto kong makita iyong mukha niya, but I knew that that could be a slippery slope. Kasi after ko makita iyong mukha niya, gugustuhin ko na makita siya in person.

"Pero... pano mo nalaman na 'di pa ako kumakain?" I asked to fill in the silence kahit sandali pa lang naman 'yon.

"Because I know you," he replied.

Napa-arko iyong kilay ko. "Really?" I asked because I wasn't buying his response. Hindi pa naman kami naging magka-trabaho ni Lui. For all he knows, tamad pala ako at bare minimum lang ang ginagawa ko sa trabaho.

"Yes," he said. "Back in legal clinic, sometimes, when you get so engrossed in the case that you'll forget to eat because you're too busy reading on the pertinent laws."

I pursed my lips and scrunched up my nose. "Ikaw, ha... pinapanood mo ako dati?" tukso ko sa kanya.

"Always," he replied and ang gwapo ng boses niya sa isip ko. Grabe lang talaga. "Told you—I always had my eyes on you."

"Alam mo ikaw..."

"What?"

I clicked on my tongue. "Wala, wala," sabi ko sa kanya. "Thanks for checking up on me, pero aalis na talaga ako in a while. Ang dami kong ginagawa saka tambak iyong kaso dito," dugtong ko habang naka-tingin sa mga bookshelf na punung-puno ng folders and envelopes. Grabe... ang daming pending. I made a mental note na ayusin agad iyon as fast as humanly possible. Kawawa naman kasi iyong mga naka-kulong dahil lang 'di umuusad iyong kaso nila.

"Alright," he replied. "Dinner later?"

Napa-tingin ulit ako sa may bundok na pendings. I really wanted to fix that mess, but I knew I couldn't get that done in a day. Deserve ko naman makipagdate siguro, but promise after nitong dinner with Lui to commemorate my first day in the prosecution, babasahin ko na iyong pending cases.

"Alright. Bye na talaga. See you later," I said at saka binabaan ko agad siya ng tawag dahil baka tumagal na naman iyong usapan namin.

On my way to the precinct for the inquest proceedings, naka-receive ako ng message from Lui reminding me to buy my sandwich. Independent girl naman ako, but iba pa rin kapag may ibang nag-aalaga sa 'yo. Lui really makes me happy, so I really hope that I make him happy, too.

Pagdating ko sa may presinto, nagpakilala muna ako since first time ko lang dito. Then I was escorted to the room kung saan gaganapin iyong inquest. Huminga ako nang malalim. I kept on telling myself that it's innocent until proven guilty. Na hindi porke nasa prosecution ako e prosecute na agad ang nasa utak ko—prosecute the guilty and release the innocent dapat.

I greeted the person in custody first before I began with my line of questioning. It lasted a whole hour bago ako natapos. Then may sumunod pa na dalawa. They were obviously lying to my face dahil hindi tugma iyong details ng mga sinasabi nila. It was frustrating but whatever.

Pagbalik ko sa office, I began drafting my recommendation. I recommend the dismissal of the first case since drug related charge 'yon and based sa initial documents presented both nung arresting officer pati nung inquest, wala namang probable cause for arrest since illegal entrapment operation 'yong nangyari. The other two cases, nagrecommend ako na magproceed na sa filing ng proper case.

I was in the middle of drafting nung maka-rinig ako ng katok sa may pintuan. Napa-tingin ako doon.

"Just wanna say hi," sabi niya sa akin. She didn't even have to introduce herself kasi halata sa mukha niya na prosecutor din siya dito.

"Oh. Hi," sabi ko na napa-ngiti. "Sorry, hindi ako nakapagpakilala kasi ang dami agad na ginawa."

"No, it's fine," sabi niya sa 'kin. "I'm Julia Zaldivar."

"Tali Hernaez," I replied with a smile.

Napa-tingin siya sa may table ko. "I see... busy agad?"

Mabilis akong tumango. "Super. Nag-inquest na agad ako," I told her tapos natawa siya at sinabi niya sa 'kin na sa kanya, pinadala agad siya sa criminal hearing nung first day niya.

"May tip ka ba d'yan?" I asked. I really wanted to make friends here. Nung sa dati kong trabaho, wala akong naging kaibigan talaga don... which was sad. Okay naman iyong mga tao sana doon kaya lang mas naniwala sila sa chismis tungkol sa lovelife ko.

"I wish," pabiro niyang sabi. "Just show up, do your job, rinse, and repeat." Natawa ako. Tama naman siya. "Pero nagddraft ka na ba ng recommendation?" she asked.

Tumango ako. "Dismissal 'yung sa may drug related case since illegal entrapment 'yung ginawa nung police," I replied. Ewan ko ba sa mga police na incharge dito. Alam naman nila na mahigpit kapag drug related charge. Bakit 'di sila sumusunod sa proper procedure? Kahit nung nasa law school pa lang ako, alam ko na 'yon, e.

"Oh..." she said, but there was a slight change in her tone kaya napa-angat nang kaunti iyong kilay ko.

"What?" I asked, worried, dahil baka magkamali ako. Unang recommendation ko pa naman 'to. Ayoko lang magkamali.

"Nothing," she said, but I looked at her, urging to help me kung may maitutulong siya sa 'kin. "I mean... you do you, pero unang kaso mo pa lang, may masasabon na agad na pulis. Just thought you should know—nagtatanim ng sama ng loob 'yong mga 'yon."

Napaawang iyong labi ko.

Julia smiled at me. "But you'll be fine," she said even though her tone told me that I would not be fine.

Umalis na si Julia at lahat, pero nasa isip ko pa rin iyong sinabi niya. Naka-tingin lang ako sa screen at iniisip kung ano ang gagawin ko. I definitely shouldn't change my recommendation... Ginagawa ko lang naman iyong trabaho ko. Kung ginawa din nung mga pulis iyong trabaho nila, e 'di wala sanang problema. Bakit naging problema ko bigla 'to?

Ito ang ang iniisip ko hanggang sa maka-uwi ako sa condo. Hanggang sa pagligo ko at sa pag-aayos ko para sa dinner namin ni Lui ay iyon pa rin ang bumabagabag sa isip ko.

"You okay?" tanong ni Lui dahil biglang nagspace out na naman ako.

Napa-tingin ako sa kanya. "I'm conflicted," I told him because I really needed him to back me up on this one.

"Work-related?"

"Duh. Don lang naman umiikot ang buhay ko. Wala na ata akong social life," I vented kasi super busy ni Alisha lately kaya 'di kami nagkikita. But we promised that we'll meet this month—I mean, we have to! Friendship requires hard work din, noh.

Lui tucked a portion of my hair on the back of my ears. "What is it about?" he asked as he stared at me lovingly kaya na-distract ako for a while.

I began to tell him about my dilemma but I didn't tell him in detail iyong sa mismong case. "So... I should still proceed with the initial recommendation, right? Kasi iyon ang trabaho ko? Hindi naman siguro ako pag-iinitan nung mga pulis, right? Kasi trabaho lang, walang personalan dapat? Pero at the same time, ayoko rin ng issue sa work kasi ganon din iyong nangyari sa work ko dati." I groaned. "Bakit ang hirap magtrabaho nang mapayapa?"

Hindi agad nagsalita si Lui, so I grabbed the opportunity to wrap my arms around his right arm tapos ay sinandal ko iyong ulo ko sa may balikat niya. I snuggled closer and calmed myself down with his scent.

"I'll do the right thing," I mumbled. "I vowed to uphold the law. Kawawa naman iyong lalaki if ever... saka kahit naman 'di ako magrecommend ng dismissal, if his lawyer's even half-good, he'll see the lapses doon sa may paghuli don sa may lalaki."

It had been a long day, so I let myself bask in Lui's presence. I could honestly just stay here, clinging onto him and it would be the best day ever... but at the same time, aware din ako na hindi siya nagsasalita. I looked at him.

"Ano sa tingin mo?" I asked.

"It's your work," he simply replied.

"And I'm asking for your input," I said.

He shrugged and tried to make it as casual as possible. "You said it yourself—the case will get dismissed either way."

Bahagyang napa-kunot ang noo ko. "You're saying na baguhin ko iyong recommendation ko?"

"No," mabilis niyang sabi. "I told you—it's your job. Do whatever you think is right."

"But if you were me?"

He grabbed the glass of wine. "But it's not me," sabi niya.

"You'll recommend the case to proceed?" I asked. "I'm not like judging..." I continued. "As you said, at the end of the day, ako pa rin naman ang gagawa ng recommendation."

Lui didn't want to answer—and that was my answer.

"Are you disappointed?" he asked.

Sinandal ko ulit iyong ulo ko sa may braso niya. "No," I replied.

I mean... Julia would also do the same. And probably all the other prosecutors... It was the smart thing to do—madidismiss din naman iyong kaso plus hindi ako pag-iinitan nung mga pulis.

But that's just an excuse that I'll tell myself to make me sleep at night.

If I do recommend the case to proceed, the guy will continue to stay behind bars. He probably has a family who worries about him. Also, I've seen the prison cell and I would not want to stay there even for a freaking night. Sa bagal ng usad ng kaso dito sa Pinas, possible na umabot ng taon bago pa makarating talaga sa court docket iyong kaso nung lalaki.

So, no, I wouldn't change my recommendation.

"Lui," I called.

"Hmm?" he replied.

I looked up and smiled at him. "I love you," I said.

Bahagyang naka-kunot ang noo niya, but only for a split second before leaned in and planted a soft kiss on my lips. I was very much aware that he hasn't said it back, but it's fine. He'd say it to me when he's ready and when that day comes, I'll be the happiest. 

**

This story is already at Chapter 44 patreon.com/beeyotch. Subscription starts at 100php per month for all stories. You can also join the patreon facebook group. You can email [email protected] for assistance :) Thank you!