Maddy's PoV

The next morning I woke up in the same place as I did the previous night, well not the previous night, when I woke up from the nightmare, great way to start my time here.

My sister was still next to me and asleep, but everyone would if they were woken up by screaming at God knows what time in the night. I felt  Franky move next to me and she sits up "you alright Mads?" She asks me and I shake my head "I can't help but think about things, I've been having pains in my stomach aswell the nightmares I have every single night" I tell Franky softly.

"Hey hey you don't have to go through this alone, you have me back now" Franky tells me giving me a small kiss on my cheek and I fake a small smile in response to her

"a year after you got sent down i blocked Evreyone out, I started falling behind at school and I came home every night with bruises from school and most nights mum would be drunk and under the influence of drugs and she would take her anger out on me" I tell my older sister out of the blue I just needed to get it off my chest and tell someone.

"That bitch, how dare she lay a finger on my baby sister" Franky whisper shouts. "I finally lost it with her and that's why she's dead" I cry into my sisters side. It was the early hours of the morning but I didn't care.

Franky kept her arm around me as I cried but before I knew it I had fallen asleep, crying.

I was soon awoken again with another nightmare "it's okay Maddy, I'm here" Franky soothes as the cell door opens to reveal oh what's her name oh yes that's right it's Liz "Bea was wondering where you had got to" Liz says to Franky and she nods

"Maddy needed me last night" Franky told her and she nodded "we heard the shouting" Liz says to my sister and leaves, Franky gets up "see you in a minute baby" Franky tells me kissing my cheek once more before leaving my cell. I sit their in silence and look at my arm.

Their was dry blood from last night, it was lucky Franky hadn't seen, if she did I would have been questioned by her. I slide my sleeves down and stand up before walking out and joining Evreyone else in the main area.

Bea was over by a kettle making cups of tea, boomer was sat on the sofa while Liz, Doreen, Maxien and Franky were sat at a table. Franky patted the chair beside her and I sat down. I was still fiddling with my sleeves and felt highly uncomfortable, iv been trying to ignore my autism pushing its way out making me not want to be in new situations and meet new people but I felt overwhelmed and soon dashed back to my cell.

I calmed myself down after I had became flappy and was joined by Franky and Doreen. "What happened back their?" Doreen asked me and I flapped slightly "you became overwhelmed didn't you Maddy?" Franky asked me seeing I was flappy

"The perks of having autism" I mumble "I am extremely bad at keeping eye contact, I'm not exactly good at meeting people well new people, new situations panic me" I explain only a few things to Doreen who knew hardly anything about my condition.

Franky came and held my hands to stop me from flapping and she tried to calm me down. "Maddy breath slowly" she tells me softly and I do so breathing in through my nose out through my mouth "that's it keep doing that" Franky tells me and I continue doing so.

"If I'm not around this is what you've got to do to stop her flapping, if none stops her she has a panic attack" Franky tells Doreen "we should tell the others" Doreen suggests "incase neither me or you are with her" she says after that and Franky nods.

"You alright to come out now baby" Franky asks wrapping her arms around me and I do the same to her  "I promise you that they won't hurt you" Franky reassured me so I nod slowly, she keeps her arm around me as we go and sit down once again.

"What was that all about?" boomer asked and I look to Franky "I have autism like Franky told you yesterday" I say quitely but loud enough for people to hear me "she's is really bad in new situations and with new people and she can't do eye contact" Franky continues

"I become flappy and start to panic, that's why I dashed off, I was flappy" I say to the women "what do you mean flappy?" Maxien asked me and I demonstrated by flapping my arms "if she's like this and me or Doreen aren't about then  you but take her by the hands, and say softly to her 'Maddy breath slowly' and then when she's breathing slowly you softly say again 'that's it, keep doing that'" Franky tells the rest "if she doesn't get calmed then she would most likely have a panic attack" Franky finishes off

Franky looks at me, I was fiddleing with my sleeves "sorry if I woke any off you last night" I mumble whisper to Evreyone and they say it's alright while Doreen gives me a look as to say 'do you want to talk about it' and I shake my head.

The unit was soon unlocked and we all headed to breakfast, Franky was on duty this morning so I stayed with Bea, Doreen and the rest off the unit as we headed to the cafeteria.

"So Maddy when's your birthday?" Liz asks me trying to make small talk "25th July" I tell her and she nods as we arrive at the cafeteria and get our breakfast. Doreen said after we had finished she would show me where everything is properly because I only knew where the unit and obviously the cafeteria was.

I bet she was only going to show me places i needed to know to ask me about my nightmare but I don't have to tell her do I, I don't have to tell what my nightmare is about.

We finished eating and soo left the others "new blood" a woman sat at a table shouts but Doreen tells me to ignore her "that's Lucy, stay away from her" Doreen tells me as we walk back to our unit, "most of us in here call her Juicy" I was curious why but didn't ask.

We made our way back to the unit and then she started showing me around "do you mind me asking what your nightmare was about last night?" Doreen asks me and I look down almost walking into a wall, luckily enough Doreen pulled me around the corner making sure I didn't.

"It's the same one I have every night. It's the night when I was raped, back at home mum used to come into my room and shout at me and have ago at me when I woke up screaming but that wouldn't make the nightmares go away." I start

"When Franky came into me last night it felt like before she was sent down, when she would comfort me and tell me it was all going to be okay" I tell her and she nods "I think you would benefit by seeing the councillor" Doreen suggest.

Immediately I shake my head as a no. "The last time I spoke to a counsellor it ended in disaster" I mumbled. You remember when I told you I assaulted teachers at school, well one was the school counsellor and I had to spend a night it the police station.

"What happened?" Doreen asked me and I shake my head not wanting to tell her and I was happy when she dropped the subject and continued showing me places I should know

She showed me the showers, yard which I guess is basically where we go at a certain time of day but what do I know... Everywhere was shown and I kinda remembered placed that were important. "We've got chores in a hour" she tells me and I nod

We both head back to the unit and I clutch my stomach in pain "are you alright Maddy" Liz asks me as me and Doreen sit down. I nod unconvincingly "your not alright are you?" Liz asks. I shake my head in the end giving in, knowing I wasn't actually alright

If I was pregnant then it would be 3 and half months untill the baby would be here, I know that much. I place my hands on my stomach and feel the pain again. I may be wrong but it might feel like a kicking baby "Maddy what's wrong" Doreen asks me

"I keep getting a pain in my stomach" I respond simply and she nods as she puts a hand on my stomach and smiles at me "that's a baby kicking" she tells me in a whisper and I look at her wide eyed.

I couldn't have a baby I'm only 17, not only that I'm in here too, this baby deserve better than me as its mother.

I couldn't take it in, how come I didn't figure this out before now, yeah my period has never been regular but I should have realised if I was pregnant, yeah I have been putting on weight.

"I know nothing about children, let alone babies" I mumble doreen pulls me into a weird sideways hug just as Franky comes up behind me "Franky can I talk to you?" I ask my older sister and she nods. "Well you know I told you about everything that has happend but Doreen said he pains I've been having in my stomach are a baby's kick" I explain and Franky looks just as shocked as I did.

"In going to be a aunt?" She asks making sure she heard me right and I nod slowly and unsteadyly "I'm only 17, I can't have this baby" I say and Franky smiles at me softly

"You can Mads, your the strongest 17 year old I know, you've been through a lot more than anyone your age has and your still fighting through, I know you'll be a great mother, anyone would be better than our mother anyway" Franky tells me whispering the end part making me smile

I knew now that I was able to look after the baby, even if I'm only 17 and in prison for murder I know I can look after this kid no matter what what people tell me.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Hi guys

Jess here, I'm so sorry my writing is so shit and I'm portraying Evreyone wrong, I'm an awful writer I know but I am actually enjoying writing this fanfiction so i hope your enjoying the story.

Well that's it for now

Bye x