TWO WEEKS LATER

"BABY?"

I hear a faint voice above me, piercing through my dreams as a soft pair of lips kiss my cheek.

I hum contentedly as his hands smooth over the skin of my arms and then over my stomach as he leans down to kiss my other cheek.

"What time is it?" I moan, trying to keep my eyes closed, not wanting to wake up.

"It's still early, Pup. But I couldn't leave for my flight without saying goodbye..."

My eyes fly open, suddenly realising that today was the day he is flying off to Australia.

As I do open my eyes, I grin behind the tears. He looks so handsome.

He's got a light brown pair of chinos on, the Crew t-shirt I bought him for his birthday, along with his standard black and white vans trainers. He's shaved and showered and he smells amazing. He smells like home.

"Don't go yet," I say, pulling him down on top of me before rolling over so I have him pinned so he can't go anywhere.

He chuckles, wrapping his arms around me as I bury my face in his neck, gliding over my bare legs and over my bum, his fingers sliding into the fabric as I grind forward.

"Tess," he groans, moving his hands up. "Don't make it harder to leave than it already is." He wraps his arms tightly around me again and pushes his face into my neck, kissing the skin there before he rolls me back over, freeing himself.

I sit up as he does, leaning forward to kiss him soundly, holding his cheek, gliding my thumb over the soft stubble on his chin that I love so much.

"I'm going to miss you."

He leans away and smiles.

Moving in with him had been best the decision I'd ever made. Since being here these last two weeks, the distance between us has been filled. I see him more, we actually spend evenings together, and I'm happier in his flat than I had expected myself to be.

When I had stayed here before, I always felt like a guest. Even though he always told me to make myself at home, I was never quite comfortable enough to just kick my shoes off and stick the TV on. Now, as soon as I come in the door, the jeans are unbuttoned, I make a mess in the kitchen, pull on a pair of Jamie's shorts and t-shirt and plonk down in front of trashy TV, waiting for him to get home.

But today he was headed away.

He's headed to Australia on an open-ended business trip - until a case he's working on is finished - and could be gone from anything between three weeks to two months. Even though I'm heading away as well, I will miss this closeness we've shared in these last two weeks, and it will feel weird without him. We've been in a bubble since the cake tasting, and I really don't want him to leave.

"Don't miss me too much," he laughs, but I can see a pained expression in his eyes, as he know where I'll be heading to in a week.

"Okay, maybe miss me a little," he corrects himself, quickly kissing me.

"I'll miss you every day. I'll be sending you so many pictures that you'll be asking me to leave you alone," I giggle.

"You better. Maybe some rude ones too, yeah?"

I swat him and he chuckles.

"Just to remember what they look like," he clarifies, shrugging. "You look like, sorry," he corrects himself.

I shake my head. "I don't like that it's open-ended."

"It's six weeks, babe."

My heart lifts slightly at there being a timestamp on it, but six weeks is still a long time. "That's so long I can't do the maths."

"It'll fly. As soon as you blink I'll be back and we can start on that future we've been talking about."

I open my eyes at those words, remembering the last big conversation we had about that. When he asked me to marry him, when he asked me to move in, the one part of our future I always wanted to talk about was left out. Kids. Children. No, that part had been left out, at least on his part, so maybe this was him changing his mind?

But seeing as I don't want to start these six weeks apart with an argument, I stay quiet and nod with a smile. He's certainly come around since Ethan was born, who was now three, but I figure we would cross the bridge when we came to it.

"What time should you be in Sydney?"

"Errrm," he thinks about. "They're twelve hours ahead, so it's going to be weird hours. I'll be there tomorrow for me and then later on tonight for you. God. Makes me tired just thinking about it."

"You can sleep on flights, so you're okay. Do you have time to acclimatise or are you straight in?"

"Straight in, but I don't mind. Less time to focus on being mind-numbingly tired. And the fact I'll be missing you too much," he adds, kissing my nose.

"Oh great, thanks," I laugh, rolling my eyes.

"You know what I mean. Now one more kiss," he murmurs, planting a soft but steady kiss on my lips as he breathes in, "before I'm late," he adds, mumbling it against my lips.

"Nooooo." I try to keep him on the bed, but he kisses me once, tickling me, distracting me. When he stands, I pout, "Fine. But please call me. I don't care whether you wake me up. Every day. Please." I kneel up on the bed and shuffle over to him. "I love you."

He smiles. "I will. I love you more."

"I love you most."

With one last, painfully brief kiss, I roll ungracefully off the bed, walking out of the room after him as he heads towards the front door. He picks up his bag and suit bag, blowing me a kiss before he closes the door behind him. I walk over towards the living room, watching out the window as he heads towards the car waiting for him. He looks up and sees me, so he waves at me, blowing one more kiss before he gets in the car.

I watch as it drives around the corner, trying to contain the lump in my throat. I've never liked watching people driving away. The last time someone drove away to get on a plane, something bad happened. I close my eyes, sending out a silent prayer to the universe, asking it to protect Jamie with everything it had.

***

"TESSIEEEEEEEEE!"

I hear a squeal as I cut the engine, looking up to see my little sister squirming n Mark's arms.

I jump out of the car just as Mark puts her down, holding my arms out so I can catch her. She pushes me over as she jumps but I don't mind as I roll on my back, cradling her as she kisses my face.

"How you doing little girl? Gosh you've grown!" I squeal, sitting up so that she's looking into my eyes as she stands, with me still sitting.

"A foot!"

"You've grown a foot?" I say, incredulously and she nods.

I stand and scoop her up before walking over to Mark. "Hey Mark."

He kisses my cheek and I realise he's got stubble that is at least three days old and his eyes have deep blue circles underneath them.

"Wow, you okay?" I put a hand on his shoulder.

"Terrible twos, Tess. Terrible, terrible twos."

I laugh. "You're not a terrible two, are you?" I ask Ellie and she shakes her head, dropping it shyly into my shoulder. "You're nearly a terrible three!"

Mark chuckles. "She's as sweet as sugar for you. You must have the magic touch. Traffic okay?" He asks as he walks to my car, grabbing my bag.

"Yeah. A bit slow around the M11 but it was okay."

He puts an arm around me as we walk to the house. "And how's Jamie?"

I shrug as Ellie blows a raspberry. Unfortunately, Ellie is very astute to feelings, so she alwats picks up on the fact Jamie doesn't really go near her.

"He's fine. He headed to Sydney today. He texted me when he got on the flight, and he promised he would text again when he landed." I pout. "I miss him so much already."

"Sydney? Wow," he says, whistling as I nod.

"Yup. Six weeks too. It's going to be a looooong six weeks."

He chuckles as he gets the door. "It'll fly by."

I put Ellie down on her feet as I hear a set of paws making their way towards me. I turn the corner and I just about keep my footing as Bruce excitedly jumps up at me, licking my neck, face and cheeks.

"Hey boy!" I scratch his ears before kneeling down as he drops to the floor, lying on his back for belly rubs.

Ellie helps me as Bruce's tongue lolls out of his mouth, breathing excitedly. He's such a softie, and I've missed him so much.

Dad had him at home for a while, but Jamie really doesn't like dogs after he was bitten by one when he was a boy. Although Bruce wouldn't harm a fly, and Jamie did try to stick it out, but in the end Mum agreed to look after him full time. Now that she isn't travelling as much, it's easier.  I always see him when I visit, which is regularly, but part of me still feels like I shouldn't have to give up my dog. But then dog versus fiance, there really isn't a contest is there.

"Where's Mum?" I ask, still scratching Bruce's belly.

"Oh, she's out shopping. Someone had to wait in for the guest of honour," Mark laughs. "She should be back soon though." He puts my bag near the door. "Can I get you a drink?"

"Oooh, yes please. I am parched."

"Tea? Or something stronger?"

I laugh. "Tea would be great."

"Coming right up. I'm sure Ellie and Bruce can show you the paddling pool out back while you wait," he says, pointing to Ellie who was now pulling at my trouser leg.

"Okay, okay, come on then," I say to her, giving in to her tugs with Bruce following on behind.

***

"BRUCE IS SO HAPPY you're here," Mum says when we're sitting on the sofa after dinner. Ellie is in bed, exhausted after the afternoon's activities, and Bruce has his head in my lap, tail thumping as I stroke the soft fur on his head.

"Only Bruce?" I joke and she laughs.

"Ellie too. That little girl loves you. She's been talking non stop about you coming all week."

That tugs on my heart strings as I really do love seeing my little sister. "I'm just sorry I can't come more often."

"Hey, don't worry, I know you're busy. How are the interviews going?" She asks.

"Yeah, they're okay. I've had two, but it's just finding the right balance at the moment."

"Which schools?" Mark asks.

"Erm, Banstead, which was our rival school, and Perse up in Cambridge. All my hopes are hanging on getting Wickstead though."

"You want to go back to your school?"

I nod. "Yeah, I would love that. The chance to see school from the opposite side, plus the English and PE departments are the best in London."

I'd done my research. As cheesy as it sounds, I couldn't wait to go back, and Wickstead is what I'm holding out for.

"When will you hear back, do you reckon?"

"Soon hopefully." I cross my fingers.

I'd had a preliminary interview, as they interview all shortlisted candidates - so at least I know I'm shortlisted - but that was months ago, so I'm starting to lose hope.

"I have placement offers though, so I have options."

"And is this for PGCE? Or both?"

"Wickstead is post-PGCE, but the others are just for the PGCE."

Mum nods and smiles at me, taking my hand. "Well, I'm proud of you regardless, Tess. After a crappy few years, you've most definitely turned your life around."

I beam at her. "Having you guys nearby has helped, and Dad. I don't know what I would have done without you."

"We aren't going anywhere," she says, looking at Mark, who nods at her. "Especially as we have a bit more news for you."

I frown. "News?" I ask, eyebrows raising as I watch Mum slide her hand down to cover Mark's, which are placed protectively over her belly. I gasp, "Oh my god! Mum, are you pregnant?"

She laughs as I jump up from the sofa, completely forgetting I had Bruce's head in my lap. He yelps and shakes himself as I bounce over to Mum, leaning down to hug her. I wrap my arms around her, squeezing as tight as I can without squashing her.

Tears are building in my eyes as I say, "Mum, that is amazing. When is it due?"

"March," they say together. "Another girl."

I cup my mouth. Another baby sister.

"And Ellie doesn't know yet. We were going to tell her tomorrow, but we were hoping you would help with that?"

"Help?"

Mark nods. "Yeah. She's not great at sharing things, so we thought maybe you'd show her how cool it is to be a big sister, and to share things. I think she loves you more than us, so we may even leave you to tell her," he jokes.

"Ha!" I laugh. "Oh my gosh, of course I can help, but I know she'll be excited. It's every girl's dream to have a little sister, and now I'll have two!" I beam again, hugging them both together before sitting back. "Are you excited?"

"Definitely," Mum answers quickly. "But I think we're agreed that one more will be enough." She rubs her belly, looking down with a look of pure happiness in her eyes. "Four kids is about enough my poor uterus can take," she laughs and I squirm slightly, cringing, but liking that she said four, not three.

"The only thing that's always so sad is that they never got to meet Matty."

Mark's words settle over Mum and me. Ellie and Matt would have been inseparable because they are incredibly similar. She's got the same fiery temper, the same attention to every single detail, the same protectiveness and the same nose and smile that sometimes I feel like he really is back with us. I miss him more than words can describe, I will always miss him, but I will always choose to believe that he lives on in all of us. He lives on in our memories and the things we remember about him. He will live on in all of us that remember him for years and years to come.

As we finish the programme, me stroking Bruce's head again and them arguing over gameshow questions, I start to smile at me being a big sister twice over. Spending time with Ellie has helped me come alive, and I can't wait to do it all over again when the new baby arrives.

"Do you know if Millie is doing anything for Archie's birthday tomorrow?" Mum asks out of nowhere.

I frown. "What do you mean?"

"Oh. I just knew you guys always used to make such a big deal of your birthdays at school."

Tomorrow? I pull out my phone and realise his birthday really is tomorrow.

"I have no idea. But they probably are doing something. She wouldn't let him not celebrate his birthday."

I smile as I get an idea, pulling my phone out of my pocket.

I go to Amazon and order a blue t-shirt for dogs, as well as matching ones for Ellie and me. I know Ellie and I have a day together tomorrow, so one of our activities could be birthday shirts for him. Plus, if I can't say happy birthday in person, who better for it to come from than his favourite pup.

"I can't believe you guys will be twenty-two. How am I old enough to have a twenty-two year-old daughter?"

"With another one on the way," I add.

"We'll almost be outnumbered," Mark jokes.

"Almost! But you know I'm always here for babysitting if you need a break, regardless of what Jamie's doing." I try to keep the edge out of my voice but the narrowing of Mum's eyes tells me she heard it.

"You're going to regret offering," Mark winks.

I smile back at him beforeI turn back to the TV for a few more minutes before I decide I'm actually ready for bed.

"If you guys wanted a break tomorrow, you should go out. Ellie and I can hang out and leave you guys to do the things adults with no kids do."

Mark barks a laugh. "I have no idea what that is anymore."

"Sleep. I can take her to the zoo, and I've got arts and crafts stuff organised too. Go to the spa or something, or to see some friends," I suggest.

Mark and Mum look at each other. "You know what, that would be really nice. Are you sure, Tess?" Mum asks.

"Of course! Take a night off as well, seriously. I can look after her."

Mum blows me a kiss. "You are an angel."

"Anything for you and my little sister," I say as I shuffle forward on the sofa.

"Are you headed up?" Mark asks and I nod.

"Yeah, I'm beat." Bruce jumps down from the sofa and rest sits, resting a big paw on my knee. "Can he sleep in my bed tonight?" I ask.

"Of course he can. He wouldn't have it any other way."

***

AFTER BRUSHING TEETH, GETTING into pyjamas and texting Jamie to check in, I hop into bed, sighing at how soft the bed is and how comfortable the duvet and pillows are.

"I could get used to this," I murmur to myself as Bruce puts a heavy head on my thighs.

I smile as I remember this was how we slept all the time.

Bruce was always in my room. Even if he started off in his basket downstairs, somehow he would find me and sneak up onto the bed, in between Archie and me, playing sausage. My door never closed properly unless you locked it, so he learned to tap it with his nose and let himself in.

"Brucey?" I call quietly, and he huffs a sigh before moving his head to look at me.

I take a picture in the darkness, smiling as the night shot shows him as comfy as he can be, before setting it as my new background.

"I've missed you buddy," I tell him and he gets up and plops himself down in front of me, his nose barely a few centimetres from mine. "You missed me?" He answers with a lick of my nose.

"Yeaaah, you're a good boy," I say, scratching his chest as he rolls on his back. "I've missed you too."

I couldn't believe he was six now. I feel like so much has happened in the last few years it was hard to measure time. But one thing that was always certain was that he was always a good boy, and he's my good boy.

As his snores envelop the room, I smile as my mind takes me off to dreamland, dreaming of the first night we had him, where I woke up to find him curled up in mine and Archie's arms.