AFTER ANOTHER HOUR ON the road, we finally arrive at the apartment.

Both of my passengers are still fast asleep once I've parked, so I shake Millie's shoulders gently first. She stirs finally, after I resort to slightly more violent shaking, and yawns as she looks around, realising we had stopped.

"Holy shit, we're here?" She wipes the drool off the side of her mouth. "How long was I asleep?" she asks.

"An hour, maybe. It's okay; even you can't beat jet lag," I joke.

"Apparently not," she smiles back before she leans round the seat, tapping Greg's leg. "Babe?" She taps it again and we both jump when he suddenly sits up with a start. He looks completely disorientated, but when he sees us, he remembers and rubs his eyes.

"Jesus. How long was I asleep?"

Millie giggles. "You fell asleep before the engine even started, Greg."

His shoulders sink before he shrugs. "I'm sorry."

She shakes her head smiling, tapping his knee. "All good. Gave me a chance to grill this guy." She nudges me sideways. She sounds like she's joking but I know she's not. Her grilling is nowhere near done.

"Are were here?" Greg asks, yawning again. He really is out of it.

Millie laughs as I answer. "Yup, come on. You can sleep better upstairs and for as long as you want."

"But after breakfast," Millie adds, pointing at me as if she's scolding me. "Pancakes?"

"Of course! I believe Pete and Ollie are making the full works." It's all I need to say before she darts off towards the lift, not waiting for us.

"We'll get the bags then!" I yell after her. She waves just before the doors close and I shake my head.

"She seems excited to see Ollie," Greg says.

"Don't worry, her excitement is purely based on the prospect of pancakes than who's cooking them," I joke.

The relief in his smile is evident. He grabs both of their bags and as we walk to the lift, I can see him looking at me.

"You can ask."

He chuckles. "Erm, yeah. What the hell happened to your face?" He ducks his head and I tip up my chin, revealing the worst of the remaining bruising. "It looks like it hurt."

"It still does."

"Who did it? Tackle gone wrong or something?"

I hit the button for the lift. It always takes a while to get from the basement to the penthouse and back, so we have a few minutes. "Telling you is probably easier than telling Millie. It's a bit embarrassing," I add.

"Why's it embarassing?"

"Well... It was over a drawing." I clear my throat. "A... naked drawing."

"A naked drawing?" he laughs. "You mean like the one you did of T-" He stops when he sees my eyes widen, shocked at him knowing such sensitive information.

"Yes," I whisper through gritted teeth. "And I can't believe Millie told you that!"

"I can't believe you told Millie that!" he counters.

"I didn't. She found my sketchbook."

His chuckles start getting louder as my cheeks redden further, but knowing it couldn't get much worse, I continue.

"Lara and I had just moved on to the next stage in our relationship, and I had this amazing idea."

"An amazing idea to draw her naked."

I scowl at him. "Yes. And the plan massively backfired. We went to pick something up at her brother's place afterwards and I accidentally left the drawing there. When I got there, he had in his hands, and he just flipped..."

"He beat you up?"

"Beat me up is putting it lightly. I was lucky to get out of there to be honest," I say, shivering. I had broken ribs, which are still tender, broken cheek bone and a severely bruised jaw." I tap my cheek. "Got a metal plate in there now."

He reaches up to touch it. "Holy shit. What did Lara say when she found out?"

I sigh and grit my teeth. "She didn't believe me."

"What?" His jaw drops.

"Yup. It seems Billy had got himself beat up while I was in hospital and pretended I'd been the one to go after him. Supremely fucked up."

"Holy shit, I hope you kicked her out." He shakes his head. "I would have."

"Believe me, I wanted to. But then if he was unstable enough to do that to himself, then I didn't want something to happen to Lara."

He points upstairs. "She's not still here is she?"

I shake my head. "No, she's in Brookylyn at the moment. He's here helping with how to get Billy help, but the two of them will be moving back to San Francisco soon. She's moving home; both of us are."

"Jesus, Arch. How come you didn't say anything?"

I watch as the numbers tick closer to fifty. "I was..." I think about it for a second. "I was just embarrassed, and I was angry at myself for putting my faith in the wrong person, and for being so naive in thinking that I could finally be happy."

"Arch, that's ridiculous. Of course you should be happy. How were you to know she'd turn into a fucking bitch?"

I raise my eyebrows.

"What?" He shrugs as the door pings open and we can hear Millie cackling with Ollie. "Do you know where she is?"

"Yeah, Brooklyn." He nods, realising I'd said it before. "But I suppose she did make me happy while it lasted, right?"  I suggest.

He shrugs. "But now you're unhappy," he says.

"I'm not unhappy. I'm actually happier than I've been in a long time, and Lara's helped with that. I just need to choose the right person... and she isn't." He smiles as I do. "Right now, what makes me happy is family."

"Which is why it's great you're coming home, mate." Despite being tired, he smiles wider than he had done all day.  "I, for one, am so glad you've come to your senses. And Millie is going to flip her shit." I raise my eyebrows and laugh. "In a very good way."

"I do agree it is about time. But it's a surprise, so don't say anything."

A beeping noise below us makes us look down, and I realise Millie's phone had dropped out of her bag. As I pick it up, the home screen lights up, showing me a picture of her, Tessa and Greg up a mountain somewhere, looking bundled up and cold. There are a few figures behind them, but for a few seconds, all I can see are the intense green in Tessa's eyes. A pang of longing shoots through me, but I recover quickly, very aware Greg is right behind me.

"That was Ben Nevis at Easter last year. Me, Millie and Tess got up there first, with Jamie and Danny helping Charlotte bring up the rear." He chuckles. "I swear Tessa is half mountain goat."

I can't help but laugh at that. Tessa and I had climbed Ben Nevis in Sixth Form and she was bypassing people jagged cliff edges at points that made me feel sick. I joined her on a couple, as there was quite literally a queue for the top, but I took the wimp's way out for the rest.

"Wait, did you say Danny and Charlotte went too?"

"Yeah, they joined us a few days after we left. We stayed at Mark's place again." I nod. "They'll be excited you're coming back as well." He opens the door to the apartment but my feet remain planted where they are. "Hey, you okay?"

"What?" I look up and shake my head. "Oh yeah, fine. Just thinking."

Suddenly realising how much I missed my friends, the other people I had left behind when I exiled myself here. Charlotte and Danny are the best of them, and I'd let them down more recently than any others.

"You go on in. I'll be in in a minute."

"You sure you're okay?" he asks, slightly concerned.

I nod. "Yeah, fine. I've just got to send something..."

He lingers for a second but then goes into the apartment, shutting the door, leaving me in the hallway, overthinking something just like I always do.

A few weeks ago, six to be exact, Danny asked me to be his Best Man. When it came through, I sat there staring at it telling myself there was no way I could say yes. I didn't feel ready to go back, and I certainly wasn't ready to see people like Will or Rob, who I knew would take longer to forgive me than some others. I couldn't face them.

But then it hit me just now. It wasn't about me. Danny hadn't asked me because he wanted me to face anyboday. He asked me because he wanted a friend to stand up there with him, on one of the best days of his life.

Danny and Charlotte had shown true friendship to ask me. Despite everything I've done to them, despite how ungrateful I've been, they still have that faith me that I thought I had lost years ago. They still had the strength to offer me this incomprehensible lifeline in making me a part of their day.

I smile as I pull my phone out and find Danny's message.

No more waiting, I was saying yes, and soon my fingers start tapping by themselves, tapping the words I should have sent back as soon as I'd received the message in the first place.

Hey mate, firstly I just want to apologise for my lack of contact these last few years. The stuff in my head has been a bit overwhelming recently. I know I have a lot to answer for, to you and to everyone else back home... but I'm working on it and I'm getting there, I promise. Secondly, nothing would give me greater joy than standing up there with you on your big day. I know you would have asked Matt, had he been here, and I only hope I can fill those incredible shoes as best I can. Count me in. I'll be there, and I won't let you down, I promise. Arch x

As I hit send, a huge weight lifts up off my shoulders. I smile. I thought it was the hardest question to answer, but in actual fact, it was one of the easiest.

Shoving my phone back in my pocket, I head back into the apartment. Ollie and Millie are doubled over laughing in the kitchen, as Greg has gone back to resting his eyes. Pete looks exhausted as he makes his way over to me, and I laugh, knowing exactly why.

"Your sister is nuts, man." I just shrug. My sister has a tremendous amount of energy, enough to get anyone out of any kind of funk. "You glad to have her here?"

"Definitely. It's been too long."

"I bet. You planning anything special for the big reveal? Feel free to ask Ollie and me to make ourselves scarce."

"Nah, you're okay." I shake my head. "I was planning to casually ask her about Harlow and then keep saying 'we' or something, just seeing how long it takes her to catch on."

"It won't be long. She doesn't miss a trick."

"I know; I'm counting on it."

When another bubbly giggle comes out from Ollie and Millie, Pete laughs too. "I can't believe we found someone who matches Ollie's unlimited energy."

"Yep, that's our Millie. I'm glad you finally got to meet her. You should stay for dinner too; we're ordering Five Guys."

"Yeah could do, I don't think we have plans.. Let me check with Nicky."

"Invite him. The more the merrier, and the better it makes me look with all my awesome friends," I joke.

He chuckles. "Have you asked Lara?"

"No," I say quickly, quick enough to make him raise his eyebrows.

"Dude, you should."

Despite telling him what happened, Pete is the only one who thinks that me not seeing her anymore is a bad thing.

"I can't. We're friends, just about, but I can't invite her here now that Millie knows."

"Oh jeez, she knows?"

I point to the yellowing bruises on my cheek. "Couldn't really hide it."

He sighs, but when he looks at me, he finally nods. "Fine, but just know that I think you should." He points at me before walking back over to the giggle party going on in the kitchen.

I suppose I could invite her, but part of me is actually she has now moved out. Even when we put it behind us, it still felt weird with her here. I said I had forgiven her, but I think both of us realised that I never really could. I know why Pete's acting like this; it's because she's been such a good friend to me since I got here. She's the only one that knows the full story about Matt, but I can overcome some things, but what she did... I don't think I'll ever be able to overcome that.

Maybe she had been that stepping stone I needed to move on, rather than the one I would move on with. It was apparently something that was never meant to be... and that's okay.

I smile it is okay, because I'm happy. My sister is here, currently throwing pancake batter across my kitchen at Ollie, and that's all I need in the world. Family, friends and laughter, the world's greatest medicine.

***

AFTER PUTTING GREG AND Millie's stuff into the guest room, I come back downstairs to find everyone sitting at the table, a large stack of pancakes on everyone's plates.

Sitting next to Millie, who had put herself at the head of the table, I take her hand for a moment, giving it a squeeze as I smile at her.

"You okay? You took your time coming in earlier..."

I nod, chuckling. "Nothing gets past you does it." She beams proudly. "I was just sending a message to someone."

She frowns but then she shakes her head as she shoves my head lightly. "You are okay though... aren't you?"

That question used to be hard to answer, but now it was easy. It was the easiest question in the world.

I nod with a smile; a real, genuine smile.

"I am you know. And I've got a few things I want to tell you..."

She raises her eyebrows and the whole table seems to go quiet. "Oh yeah? Anything exciting?"

"I hope so." I smile. "We're having Five Guys for dinner."

Her shoulders sink on cue and I can't help but laugh before her hand connects sharply with my shoulder.

"Ow!"

"That's not news! I've had that before."

"Ahh, but you haven't had the New York ones though. You and Greg won't be disappointed, I promise."

"I'm sure we won't be." She looks at my expression - excited, eyes bright - and frowns before she looks at me skeptically. "Are you sure there isn't something else you want to tell me?" She leans forward and pokes a finger into the dimple on my cheek. "Your face looks like it's about to break," she laughs.

"Well... now that you mention it, there was something." I decide that telling her about everything isn't worth holding in. I'd ruin it one way or another if I kept it to myself, so it may as well be now.

She smacks my shoulder again, in the same place, except this time it's harder. "Hey!"

"Arch, come on, the suspense is killing me."

I narrow my eyes before regaining my composure. "Fine. Well... you know Danny and Charlotte are getting married?"

"Of course I did, but what's that got to do with you?"

I can't believe she isn't getting this - it must be the jet lag - but it's making me laugh that she's not caught on yet.

Widening my eyes, I tell her, "Danny asked me to be his best man."

She doesn't react, which isn't what I expected. Well, she frowns rather than sounding excited.

"Arch, he asked you ages ago."

I look at her. "I know he did."

"Well... Wh-what did you say?" I can now hear the excitement in her voice building as my smile gets wider.

"What did you think I said! I said yes!"

Her hand flies to her mouth and, right on cue, she squeals,  "What?!"

"Yeah. I'm coming home in December... for Danny and Char's wedding." I wipe at the tears now streaming down her face before pulling her into a hug. "How does that sound?"

She's shaking as she laughs and cries at the same time.

"You're coming home?" She's blubbering now and she's making me cry too. She pulls back from me, keeping her hands on my shoulders, lip quivering.

"And you know what's better than that?" I ask.

She leans away from me, looking skeptical. She wipes her eyes, despite the tears continuing rolling down her cheeks, but I can see she's trying to focus on me throw the blur.

"What? What can be," she hiccups, "better than that?"

"Oh, I don't know," I start, wiping a tear off her chin. "How about... me coming home for good?"

It takes a moment for the words to sink in. I suppose she's been waiting so long to hear those words coming from my mouth that she's maybe thinking she's imagined it.

But when she starts to smile wider, her cheeks pushing her eyes into slits as her shoulders start to shake again with tears, I know it's sunk in. She cups her mouth, and I know that, despite the tears, she's extremely happy to hear me say it... at long last.

"You're coming home?" She whispers, cupping her mouth when I nod again before she covers her eyes with her hands.

I don't know what to do other than wait for her to calm down, but I'm guessing the combination of shock and tiredness is making my news overwhelm her.

I'd been ready to come home for ages now, but I just needed to find the right moment to tell Millie. I knew once I told Millie, it would feel really real. I also knew that I couldn't go back on my word, so that's why I've spent so long making sure it is the right thing to do. I had to be sure because it wasn't just going to affect me... it was going to affect people at home too.

But for now, no matter whether I was making the right choice for me, I was making the right choice for Millie. Right now she was beaming from ear to ear, so nothing else mattered. 

"When?" Greg finally asks me, even though he already knew. Millie nods, and I know he's potentially asking me because she can't speak.

"Well, I have one more term of college. I've miraculously been able to make up nearly a whole year, so finish in December... as long as I don't fuck up my last few modules."

I can hear my own voice cracking as Millie broke down in front of me, so I swallow the lump in my throat and smile at her.

"Christmas this year, I'll be home. And I'll be home for good... because we have a wedding to go to!"

She hugs me tightly, but then as she pulls away, she frowns. "Where are you going to stay? You can st-"

"No, Mils. I can't stay there, you know that."

"Andy will be fine with it."

I shake my head. "I can't do that to Tessa. Not to mention Jamie will probably punch me in the face."

She opens her mouth to say that wasn't true, but I give her a look. He definitely would punch me.

"Besides, my plan is to get all the building work started on your bakery... so can live in a room there until there's a liveable room in the farmhouse."

So far one room was liveable, but Danny had promised me his team would be on it. By Christmas we should be looking at a watertight farmhouse and a baking school that is nearly ready for opening. It was quite exciting to be honest.

"Arch, you do realise you'll need to talk to her at some point, right?" she asks me, her face now serious.

"I know that, and I will."

"And not at the wedding. You need to do it before then."

Given Tessa is Charlotte's best friend, I knew she is Maid of Honour. It means that the two of us would have to be thrown together somehow on the day, so we needed to clear the air.

I narrow my eyes jokingly at her, but as her frown turns to another smile, I can't help but smile with her.

"You've made me so happy, Arch. Thank you!"

She jumps into my arms, squeezing me tight. I squeeze her just as hard, knowing that I needed to keep that smile on her face as long as possibly could... and I would do anything to make that a reality.