THE NEXT MORNING, I wake first. Hell, who am I kidding, I haven't slept at all.

Jamie fell asleep with his head on my stomach, wrapped around me, his breath tickling my naked tummy as he dreamed. As he slept, my mind ran marathons, overthinking everything as it usually did, when actually it was pretty simple.

In a quiet moment, catching our breath, he had told me he didn't want to get married for another year or two. It was a relief in a way, because it gave us time, but it was also a relief because I knew both Mum and Dad would freak at us getting engaged so young. It isn't the same for us as it is with Danny and Charlotte, as they had been together since they were fifteen. For us, we had only known each other three years, and together for that same amount of time. Mum would argue we didn't know each other yet, but I could argue differently.

Jamie knew my darkest deepest secrets. He knew about Archie. He knew my weird insecurities, and he knew I was damaged, yet he loves despite all those things. Because of all those things. And I know him too. I know his family mean the world to him, and that he would do absolutely anything for them. I know his hopes and his dreams are what make him the man he is, and I know his humility is one of the most beautiful things about him.

But then there was that drawer, the drawer that was getting closer and closer to having to be opened.

Jamie knew I was going to be talking to Archie, and a tiny niggle in my mind makes me question whether he couldn't wait because he didn't want me to go to New York without being engaged... but I liked to think that Jamie trusted me at least. He wouldn't do that... He wouldn't propose because he wanted to stake his territory.

Would he?

But that was just it isn't it. By saying yes to Jamie, I'm closing that door that leads to Archie firmly shut. Even if he did want it for me in the first place, a tiny part of me was hoping that maybe he would come out fighting for me. But...obviously not.

Everything we had, our connection, it was all a lie, something he could apparently toss to the side as if it was nothing, whilst leaving me gasping for air. However that doesn't mean I won't go and see him in New York. Jamie and I both know I won't be able to move forward properly unless we talk it out, and if it ends with us never speaking to each other again, well at least we would have had the conversation.

Millie had told Archie about Jamie pretty soon after we got together. Pretty soon after that I had my fainting episode, but I chose to believe at the time that it was a coincidence, and that his voice in my head was my imagination. But I am glad she told him. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt him, and I knew that I could have told him myself I would have, so Millie was the next best thing.

The same goes for now. I didn't want to go to New York and have to spring the news on him. I wanted him to know, because it was the right thing to do, and I knew Millie was the only one who could help me there. If he found out any other way, it would hurt him, and despite what he did, I can't do that.

Sighing, I carefully untangle myself from Jamie and pull the shirt Jamie evacuated last night when we got home. Grabbing a glass of water, I head out onto the patio outside the cabin with Jamie's hoodie. It's still early, but the seat is warm when I sit down, already heated by the sun's morning rays.

Dialling Millie's number, I take a deep breath as it rings. In fact I'm just about to hang up, thinking she must still be asleep, when something makes a noise.

"Hello?" I ask quietly, not sure why I'm whispering.

"Tess?" Millie answers, sounding very much awake.

"Hey! Sorry I thought I got your answerphone there," I laugh.

"Nope, it's the real me! How are you doing? It's been weeks! Aren't you coming home soon?"

So many questions. "Yeah next week! Well, end of next week. We're headed up to Jamie's first to get the rest of his stuff, and then headed back. I handed in my dissertation yesterday so I'm done now!"

"Oh that's exciting! Yours was the superhero one right?" She giggles.

"Yep. I will never have any idea how I was allowed to do it, but let's hope I do well in it."

"You will. You always do." I can see her eyes rolling all the way from up here. "I can't believe you made us sit through all of them at Easter!"

"It's Marvel! Who doesn't love Marvel?" I joke.

"Me apparently. Well, at least only if you put all twenty-three on at the same time."

Films weren't really Millie's thing. Baking is. She used to put up with them because films were the rest of our thing, but now baking is hers. I bet you she was baking right now. Checking my watch, it's just gone seven, and there would be no other reason to be awake at this early, other than to bake.

"Anyways, what are you up to?" I ask, tucking myself deeper into Jamie's hoodie.

"I'm actually at your mum's house."

I raise my eyebrows as a lightbulb flicks on above me. "Oh."

I wasn't sure if I was ready to tell Mum yet, but then again, with Mum travelling for a few months, now may be the only time I'd have before it was too late. I look back at the cabin, thinking Jamie should be here for this, but on the off chance she does react badly I didn't want him to hear.

"Tess?"

I shake my head, realising I had been monologuing to myself. "Sorry. This is going to sound a bit odd, but can you actually go grab them?"

"Sure, hang on." She doesn't sound surprised I would ask, but the phone goes silent for a few seconds before I see an invitation to join FaceTime.

Before I click accept, I zip up Jamie's hoodie and flatten my wayward hair, smiling as everyone comes into view.

Millie is in her pyjamas, with no sign of flour like I had thought, her hair freshly shaved, but the other side in a mess. Mum and Mark are in their dressing gowns, sipping coffees and little Ellie is on the floor at their feet, nose in Mum's phone. From her tongue out, the same thing I do when I concentrate, she must be playing a game.

"Els," Mum says and she grunts a response, not looking up. "Ellie, Tessa is on the phone."

She looks up immediately, giving me a massive smile. Tears come to my eyes as she does, because I miss her so much. First thing I want to do when I get home, before they go away for ages, is to see her and give her a big cuddle.

"You've grown so much, oh my goodness!" That wasn't exaggerating. I swear she had grown nearly a foot.

"I have more teeth Tessie!" She squeals excitedly, showing me her tiny gnashers. Millie zooms in as Ellie heads towards her until it looks like the camera is in her mouth. I giggle at Millie's reaction to said phone in mouth.

"Look at all of those!" I beam. "You've got more than me!" I flash my own teeth, very glad video calls don't include smell. My mouth tasted fuzzy from all the champagne yesterday.

"My phone is now covered in Ellie spit," Millie giggles and Ellie laughs with her, finding the whole thing hilarious. "But anyway, what's up? What you got us all on tentahooks for?" She winks at me.

I take a deep breath, now wishing I wasn't on FaceTime. At least on a normal call, I didn't have to worry about my facial expressions. I could never hide an emotion.

"What's wrong?" Mum asks.

"No, no. Nothing's wrong." I laugh as I decide to just rip the band aid. "Jamie asked me to marry him yesterday," I tell them.

A squeal erupts from Millie, and Ellie, but Mum is silent, and I swear to god she's lost all the colour in her cheeks. This obviously wasn't the news she wanted to hear.

Painful silence ensues, and my plan of showing them the ring, having everyone squealing in delight, is all going up in flames. I wanted to rewind two minutes and wait the months until they were back from their holiday.

A cough finally comes from Mark and he stands and takes Ellie. "I'm just going to get her dressed," he says. If he's doing that, he knows Mum is going to shout, so I swallow nervously and brace myself.

After another couple of minutes of silence, I swear I'm going to be sick. But finally, Mum moves. She sighs and then takes the phone from Millie, walking into the garden.

"Tessa, as happy as I want to be about this, and as lovely as Jamie is, you are way too young to get married, honey."

She may as well have punched me in the stomach.

I wanted to shout at her, telling her she was a hypocrite for saying that because Mum married Dad at a way younger age than I am now. But then I knew how she would come back at me. She would say, 'Yeah, and look how that turned out' so I go for another approach instead.

"I love him, Mum. And he loves me." I wipe a tear away from my cheek and I watch as her expression softens slightly. "And it's not as if we're getting married right now."

Her shoulders drop in relief at hearing that, so I at least know it's just the age she objects to, not the person. It makes me feel slightly better, but I still have an odd sour taste in my mouth.

"You don't want me to marry him?" I ask her quietly, knowing I was now starting to think irrationally. I try to keep my voice down; Jamie is a light sleeper and I don't want him to hear this.

"That's not what I'm saying at all."

"It seems like it is."

"Tessa, you know we like Jamie, and that he's done so much for you." She pauses. "I do like him. I just think he may be on different timescales to you... so I just want to make sure you're not rushing into anything." She sighs and smiles kindly. "I want you to be careful."

"Different timescales? What does that even mean?" My voice breaks on the last word. "And what do you mean, 'be careful'?"

"I just mean that I don't want you to feel like he's pushing you into something you don't want to do. Or something you're not ready for."

"Why would you think he's pushing me into this?"

She's doing extremely well to stay so calm when my emotions are running away with me. "Tessa, marriage is a huge step, and you're both still so young."

I wipe at my eyes before a tear can fall, and when I can finally look at her, I realise she's crying as well.

"I didn't mean to upset you, honey. You know I don't, but I just think you think about these things sometimes." My mouth drops in shock. "You always love so quickly and so deeply..."

"Mum, I would marry him tomorrow. I would if he asked me to. You have no idea how much he's done for me since we met," I sob.

"Come on, Tessa. I didn't mean it this way."

Again, my emotions have taken over and I've gone from zero to one hundred, with Mum trying to cling on and calm me down.

"You haven't seen how much he's been here. He's the one that's there when I cry at night. He's the one who's put up with all my shit... He puts up with everything."

"Tess, I know what you've been going through. You don't have to explain."

I knew I didn't have to explain, but through my tears, I do anyway.

"I love him, Mum, and if he wants to get married tomorrow, next week, next month or next year..." I trail off as the door opens behind me open.

I didn't know how much of the converssation he has heard, but I look into his bright blue eyes and smile, strength immediately coursing through me.

"Then I'll marry him," I finally finish as he comes and sits opposite me, taking my free hand in his. The warmth of it spreads through me as he pulls me gently into his lap, helping to dissipate the emotions threatening to boil over.

"Tessa, I have no doubt he loves you, and you know how much we like him. He is a great guy, and this isn't about him okay. It's about your age."

Our age had nothing to do with it. She says I always love so quickly and so deeply, but I know my heart, and Jamie knows his. I love him more than I've ever loved anyone, and its just overwhelming sometimes.

Like now. Jamie sees that and leans forward to take the phone from me.

"Mrs Wicks, Tess will call you back in a minute. She's just a bit overwhelmed."

She must say something to him, probably because she doesn't know how much of the conversation he has heard, but he doesn't look hurt or angry when he hangs up and pulls me closer just as a loud sob erupts out of me.

"Tess, what happened?"

I cough again, wiping my nose on the sleeve of his hoodie as he wipes at a tear with his thumb.

"Sh-she s-said we were t-too young t-to get ma-married."

He frowns, clearly not having heard what I said through my blubbering.

"Sh-she says I-I... I'm not thinking c-clearly." I cough out another sob as I wipe my nose on Jamie's sleeve. "She d-does... She doesn't want us to g-g-get married, Jamie," I cry, pushing my head into his shoulder.

"Aww, come here," he coos, pulling his arms around me, pulling me closer into his warm chest. "It was probably just the shock?" He suggests.

"Shock?" I ask, shocked myself. "Is that what that was?" I try to sound sarcastic but I just sound... shocked.

Maybe she was shocked.

I move to grab my phone but he takes my hand away before grabbin the phone himself and sitting on it.

"Not yet." He kisses the heel of my palm. "Let yourself calm down a bit first. Let your mum get over that initial shock." He doesn't sound hurt at all compared to me. "She'll probably call you back in a minute."

He hugs me close to him for a few minutes, dropping the occasional kiss on my forehead. I'm using the calming motions to help my hiccups subside, and after ten minutes, I'm as calm as I can be.

"I should have waited to talk to her with you," I say feebly. "You're way better at this kind of stuff." My cheeks heat. "I kind of go in all g-"

"All guns blazing?" He chuckles. "Yup. But it's why I love you. All or nothing." He taps my nose. "You do have me kind of worried though. Your mum doesn't hate me that much, does she?" He seems like he's joking but I can hear an undertone of worry.

"And you were talking as if I was forcing you," he adds with a chuckle.

"No, I wasn't! I was just making it clear that you weren't forcing me into anything. I really would get married tomorrow if you wanted to. I mean, we are in the right place for it," I chuckle and he smiles.

He wipes a thumb over my blotchy cheeks. "I'm not forcing you though am I? I'm not forcing you?" He's asking it as a genuine question, which is the easiest question to answer.

"No!" I say quickly, making sure he knew no part of me agreed with Mum... I really would get married tomorrow. "I love you, and no one will be able to stop me becoming the future Mrs McGregor." I kiss him soundly before pulling away, keeping my forehead resting against his.

"Now that does have a nice ring to it, doesn't it?" He chuckles.

"Or Mr Granger?" I suggest, but after a moment I frown. "Granger-McGregor?" I add, realising Dad was Mr Granger, then giggling as it reminds me Farmer McGregor from Peter Rabbit.

"I could be a Granger," Jamie says with a proud smile, kissing my forehead before he flinches. "But you wouldn't guess," he adds, and I hear a strange noise.

"What?"

"Someone seems to be calling you back," he answers, moving awkwardly for me to be able to get the phone from underneath him.

It's Mum and I sigh with relief as I take it, answering with FaceTime and holding it up in front of both of us.

Before I can apologise for what I said, Mum gets in there first. "I'm so sorry sweetheart. I'm so sorry. Of course I'm happy for the two of you," she smiles a genuine smile. "It was just a shock."

Jamie looks at me as if to say 'I told you so'.

"I did kind of blindside you a bit there," I say sheepishly. "And Mum, I'm so sorry too. I was angry and... I-I really am sorry."

"There's nothing to forgive," she says as Mark walks in behind her.

"Congratulations you guys," he adds putting an arm around my mum.

"And in terms of shock, his asking came as a bit of a shock too. In front of a room full of people." I give Jamie a look and he chuckles.

"How did he do it?" I hear Millie ask in the background. "Please tell me he put the ring in your champagne glass!" She giggles as she comes into frame too, hanging over Mum and Mark's shoulders holding a mixing bowl.

I smile. This is the reaction I wanted.

Jamie chuckles. "I'll go and make us some tea. No doubt you'll tell it better than I ever could."

He goes to stand but Mum says, "Jamie..." He stops and sits back for a moment. "Thank you for helping make my daughter this happy. Thank you for keeping that smile on her face."

His face transforms into a smile as she says it. "She makes me equally happy, Mrs Wicks, if not more," he says before kissing me softly.

As he walks away, Mum calls, "How many times do I have to tell you to call me Laura."

"At least once more!" He calls back before heading inside.

Once I know he's not listening at the door, I begin the story.

"He's brought me to this amazing place just outside Inverness," I start, turning my camera around to show them the stunning view from our patio. It earns me gasps of wonder from all three and I smile as I turn the camera back to face me. "It's been a chilled weekend here, after handing in my dissertation. We've been for loads of walks, and saw Sophie and Ellis on Saturday, with Ethan. Then last night we went all fancy and to do up at the restaurant here. We were just waiting for our desserts - chocolate soufflés, Millie - and he just started talking about falling in love, and then all of a sudden he was on one knee and people were all clapping." I get a warm feeling in my chest and heat spreads to my cheeks.

"Where's the ring?!" Millie squeals and I giggle, flashing my left hand. "Zoom in closer!"

I flip the camera again and focus on my hand as Jamie comes back with two massive cups of tea. I get up to sit back on his lap and kiss him as I keep the camera on my hand, allowing us a few moments of privacy.

"Tess, that is so beautiful. Excellent work, Jamie," Millie says. "It's very you. Subtle yet unbelievably beautiful."

"Couldn't agree with you more there, Mils,"Jamie says, kissing my cheek as I turn the camera back around.

My smile is so wide my cheeks are starting to hurt.

"Look at that smile," Mum says, and I can see tears in her eyes, happy tears, completely different to her stern expression half an hour ago.

"Stop it," I say, swatting Jamie gently as he kisses my cheek, holding his lips there for a few moments before he smiles. "And it won't be for another couple of years," I add.

Jamie nods along with me. "Yeah, I hadn't actually intended to propose yesterday." Mum frowns. "But with the right setting here, the ring in my pocket, and the fact your daughter was a complete stunner last night, I just couldn't wait. If you saw what she looked like..." He looks at me quicklt before shuffling as he takes out his phone, finding the pictures of just me last night, and holding them up to the camera. "How much of a stunner is she or what?"

"Oh my God, Tessa that is a lot of back!" Millie giggles. "You look amazing!" I see her peering at the photo. "Tess, you should seriously go bra-less more often. Seriously. Who bought you that dress?"

"Jumpsuit. And Sophie did. She wouldn't let me leave unless I agreed." My cheeks have gone scarlet. "But Jamie was also a hottie yesterday too. See?" I flick over to ones of Jamie and me together.

Millie coos as Mark nods, saying, "Excellent tie."

"Thanks Mark," Jamie says with a laugh.

"Sure thing. It makes the outfit." I look at it closer and realise it was the tie he bought Jamie for Christmas last year.

Mum gives him a look and starts laughing, which then sets me off.

"What?" He laughs too. "Well there's no way I could offer any fashion kudos to Tessa could I... even though she does look beautiful." He gives me a proud smile. "Let me have my fashionable moment with young Jamie here."

"Whatever you say, honey," Mum laughs, patting his chest.

We go backwards and forwards for a while, with questions from whether we would consider getting married abroad to what kind of dress I would be going for. Even though I remind them each time we only got engaged yesterday and that we were nowhere near thinking about these things, it still makes me think. We're on the phone for nearly two hours before we suddenly realise we need to check out in a couple of hours, so with another apology from Mum and a promise of a separate phone call to Millie, we say our goodbyes.

We linger on the seats for a little longer, finishing our tea, but we soon head in to start thinking about heading away from this amazing place.

As we come inside, Jamie closes the door behind us and places the cups on the side as I reach up around his neck, stroking my hands into his hair.

He makes a contented noise before leaning down to kiss me.

"See, I told you it would be okay. Just shock."

"Thank God." I smile. "But there is a bright side to this."

"Oh yeah? And what's that?"

"The bright side is that Dad is less scary than Mum.

"That," he starts, kissing me soundly. "Is the best news I've heard all day." He starts walking me back over to the bed, picking me up before dropping me onto it and removing his shirt.

"I thought we had to check out?" I ask breathlessly as he unzips the hoodie I'm wearing.

"We still have an hour." He kisses my neck and my toes curl. "There's a lot I can do in an hour."