I've never done a songfic before, so this is a new experience for me!  

AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!  SO MANY CHOICES!!!

*Randomly picks one and tries to do it quickly, which I know will take much longer anyway...*

Here we gooo..!!!

*Watch out, watch out,

It's Kai!

Kai swaggers down the street, feeling confident on account of his newly-applied hair gel.

"Watch out, it's your favorite ninja of FI-YAAAAAAAAA!!!"  He sings out.

*I've got it all and I'm gettin' more
But I never fall, beat 'em all
'Cause you know I'm so humble
I'm so humble, I'm so humble

He nearly trips over a stray paint can randomly left in the middle of the sidewalk for some reason, but he catches himself just in time.  Kai brushes the nonexistent dust off of his gi and grins.  "It's a good thing I'm so fast, light on my feet, and modest, too.  It scares even me sometimes."

*I'm a superstar, I kick down the door
Got the money and the girls
And I'm also so humble
I'm so humble
I'm so humble, I'm so humble

He flips open a pair of dark shades and places them on his head, winking and pointing finger guns at his reflection.  The clerks (who are conveniently all girls for the purpose of this songfic) inside the bank all squeal with delight as he roundhouse-kicks the door in, saunters into their fine establishment, and asks for ten whole dollars.

"In small bills, please, if you don't mind, Darling."  

The clerk immediately faints like a true Kai fangirl, and the others immediately clamber to serve him instead.

"AAAHH!!!  YOU'RE SO AMAZING, KAI!!!"  One screeches.

Kai waves his hand dismissively.  "No, I'm just an amazingly handsome average-looking guy.  But thanks, Doll."  He blows her a kiss, and she instantly grows woozy with joy.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I've still got stuff to do."  And with that, he moves on to his next destination.

*Bar none, I am the most humble-est
Number one at the top of the humble list
My apple crumble is by far the most crumble-est
But I act like it tastes bad outta humbleness

Kai arrives at an apple crumble factory further along the street.

"HA!  I can do better than this!"  He exclaims, and immediately gets to work.  An hour later, a perfectly-baked crumble is laid out on the factory's sill to cool, the aromatic steam summoning the infamous Fugi-Dove.

"That looks delicious!"  The feathered felon shouts elatedly, and Kai offers him a piece.  

"It may not be as good as you think it will be.  It probably is, though."

Fugi-Dove's eyes light up as he tastes it.  "S'good!"  He declares.

"I knew it would be."

*The thing about me that's so impressive
Is how infrequently I mention all of my successes
I pooh-pooh it when girls say that I should model
My belly's full from all the pride I swallow

Paparazzi mob Kai as he walks out of the crumble factory.

"Kai, what's next for you as a ninja?"

"Well, I've already unlocked Spinjitzu, created my own Elemental Dragon, learned Airjitzu, re-forged the Golden Weapons, bravely sacrificed myself over and over again for my friends, (who are nearly as great as me, by the way) taken down dozens of bad guys...  Really, what can't I do?"

"That's so true.  We've heard that you'll be modelling swimwear next."

Kai waves them off.  "I dunno.  I might, I might not."  He turns away and clutches his stomach.  "Must..  Hold..  It.. .In."

*I'm the most courteous-biddable, hospitable
Reverential, normal-ary Arnold Schwarzen-orgarary
I hate compliments, put 'em in the mortuary
I'm so ordinary that it's truly quite extraordinary

Kai sweeps open the door of a hotel for a young lady.  "Welcome to Ninjago's finest hotel.  Tell them Kai sent you."  

She swoons.  "You're such a gentleman!"

"You don't need to compliment me, I'm ordinarily quite extraordinary.  But thanks."

*It's not a competition, but I'm winnin'
You won't hear me admit it
Because I'm so timid and submissive
I treat fat people like they were thin
Talk simple for the dumbos
I'm so humble

He walks by some pleasantly plump people and joins them for a while.  "Looking good!  You must be working out!"  He compliments them.

"How'd you know?!!  We just started today!  You're good!"

He bashfully lowers his head.  "Not really."  He then spots Dareth.  "Gotta go!"

"Oh, hey, Kai!  Have you come to beg me to finally join your team?  Because you know that I'd be great at it!"  Dareth flexes, and his belly sags.  "Whoops..."

"Um, not right now, Dareth.  I don't think that now's the time for that."

"Huh?"

Kai sighs and speaks very slowly to him.  "Nooo."

*I'm not your normal definition of a rockstar
I don't complain when my private jet is sub-par
Ya mom's old, but I'll ask if she's your sister
People say I'm charming, bu-but I beg to differ

Kai speaks on the phone to Jole, the tiny theatre-cleaning robot from Season Three.  "You've moved up in the world, little buddy.  I noticed that the jet I booked is a bit underheated..  You know what?  Never mind.  You're doing a great job, like me!"

He passes an ancient-looking woman and her daughter.  "You two must be sisters!  How are you doing?"

The old woman's eyes light up.  "I haven't been complimented like that in years!"  She joyfully dances a jig, then clutches her heart, her breath labored and rasping.  She collapses to the ground and is still.

As the paramedics arrive, the old woman's daughter calls after Kai.  "Thank you for letting her die happy!  Now the money's all mine!"

"What was that last part?"  Kai tries to ask, but gets swept along in the crowd.

*I feel more humble than Dikembe Mutombo
After a stumble left him covered in a big pot o' gumbo
I guess in a way, bein' gracious is my weakness
People say I'm so unpretentious for a genius

"Kai, could you solve this equation for us?  It's very difficult."  Two scholars from college ask him.  Kai glances at their test sheet.

"Cheating?  Count me in!"  He very deliberately pencils in the massively complex formula, a bead of sweat on his brow.  2+2=4.

"Whew!  That was hard!  I'm glad Zane taught me all this number stuff!"

*I've got it all and I'm gettin' more
But I never fall, beat 'em all
'Cause you know I'm so humble
I say that with no ego
I'm so humble
It's just good manners

Kai spins around in a wide circle, shouting to the sky.  "I've got it all!!!  Thank you for making me so modest, Lloyd's Grandfather!"

Lightning blasts the ground at his feet, but he jumps away.

"Just don't forget that I'm the one looking out for him, not you!!!"  Kai hollers back up indignantly.

*They say I'm a ten, but I'm an eight at best
"Plus two, " says you
Not me, 'cause I'm so humble
Mama raised me right
I'm so humble, I'm so humble

Judges randomly approach him and show him their scorecards.  "A perfect ten!!!"  They all exclaim.

"No, no.  I could only be as much as an eight."

"Plus two!"

"Of course, you're right.  In the three years that I knew my mother, she taught me so much!"  He sniffs.

*Watch out, watch out.

Kai crawls up the monastery steps, looking very worn-out.  "Get out of my way!!!"

He  finally staggers inside and flops down onto the couch, ignoring the dirty looks the other ninja send his way.  "Just be quiet and let me sleep.  Being so amazing is incredibly tiring."

1173 words.