chapter eighteen
fake
[anya rose steinburg]
-
after shawn and i leave his condo, i can't help to feel a sense of uncertainty about this whole moving on business. i am over shawn. well, i think i'm over shawn. who am i kidding, i'm not over him one bit. all dan and i did in la was fight, and about shawn too. after shawn left my apartment in london, stories became to rise about us getting back together. daniel found out, and got angry.

now, however, shawns completely moved on. he has a girlfriend, and he's in love with her. from what it sounds like, it's such an easy relationship compared to shawn and i's relationship, and they hardly ever fight.

"okay so here's the plan, we're gonna rush inside and ask to check in. if they say no, then we pretend you are ill, and you need a bed quickly. so, when we walk into the hotel, you will have to pretend to be ill." shawn explains to me, cutting me out of my trance.

"why can't we just ask for early check in?" i complain, unbuckling myself from shawns car seat.

"because that's not fun." he states, taking off his own seatbelt, and walking out of the car, grabbing my luggage from the back. i then see the doorman call a staff member to get my bags on a trolley, and shawn comes strolling back to the car with a smile on his face.

"okay, pretend you're ill now." he says, opening up my door as i clamber out. i look at him confused, as he sighs, a sudden look of concern running over his face. "sir, can you come and help my friend here? she's about to throw up and needs to get to a room quick!" shawn yells, getting the attention of another staff member. i glare at him, folding my arms, going along with shawns plan to get me my room early.

"ma'am, you're going to have to walk to the reception desk, is that okay?" the very good looking staff member tells me.

"that's fine." i reply, tiredly, as shawn guides me inside, following the staff member up to reception.

"hi, my friend, anya steinburg has booked a room here but check in isn't for another three hours, is there any chance she can get her room now? she's feeling incredibly sick and feels like she's about to throw up." shawn explains to the receptionist, flashing his pearly whites at her.

"i'll see what i can do, if you would give me two moments." shawn nods at the receptionist. "the room is ready and according to my job rules, i am not supposed to issue a room early, however given this current circumstance, i will be able to give you your room key now. you are room 2981, miss steinburg. fifteenth floor." she says, handing me my hotel room keys. "your bags will be sent up immediately."

"thank you so much." shawn answers for me, before we both rush to the elevators, clicking on the fifteenth floor button. the doors shut, and shawn looks at me with a triumphant smirk, making me roll my eyes at him.

"you're so annoying." i say, as the elevator doors open, and the two of us walk down the corridors to find my room. i unlock the door with my key, revealing a fairly large hotel room.

"i'm not annoying, just imaginative." he says, picking up one of the pillow mints, opening the package and popping it into his mouth, before flopping down onto my bed.

"what are you doing? let's go before we hit this 'traffic' you're talking about." i say, folding my arms at him.

"yeah, but we have to wait for your bags, plus this bed is comfy." he shrugs, turning on the to with the remote on the side table.

"shawn, get off my bed." i groan, leaning on my side. "and take your shoes off! you know how much shoes on a clean bed get on my nerves!" he laughs at me, kicking his shoes off, and landing them on the floor.

"chill out! you're gonna have to deal with me for all of today and all of tomorrow." he chuckles.

"shawn," i sigh, chuckling after. "get up, lazy ass."

"you're so boring." he moans, sitting up and swinging his legs over the side of the bed, standing up and walking to the doors of the balcony.

"don't you fucking dare-" he cuts me off by opening the doors and rushing out onto the fairly large balcony, smirking, as he opens up the hot tub. "shawn, stop!"

"i'm not gonna do anything, we're gonna have to sit in a car for over an hour, relax." he chuckles at me. "i feel so happy." he says, jumping onto the edge of the hot tub, sitting down, cross legged. he gazes at the scenery, a look of awe on his face. "i'm so in love, anya." his mood takes me back to the moments we would have together where he was so happy in love.

"i'm glad you are." i say, sitting next to him and meaning it.

"i love this feeling so much." he sighs blissfully, his cheeks tinged red. "she makes me so happy, anya. i just want to tell everyone about it."

"you look really good, shawn." i say. "i don't think i've ever seen you as happy as you are now." a knock at the hotel room door snaps us out of the moment, and shawn quickly gets up to answer it. i follow him, seeing my bags being put into the room, before the worker walks out and shuts the door behind him.

"okay, let's go now." he says, slipping his shoes back on, as i pick up my handbag. my phone begins to ring, and i sigh, stopping in my tracks to answer it, without looking at the caller id.

"hello?" i call into the phone, as shawn and i stop.

"hey anya, you didn't call me when you arrived." daniel's voice fills my ears and i almost freeze with fright.

"uh- sorry dan, i-i got really tired and forgot." i bite my lower lip, shawn looking at me concerned.

"are you with him now?" he warns, making my heart drop.

"what? no." i quickly lie, trying to not make him angry.

"good. don't talk to him tomorrow." he says, hanging up the phone. sighing, i put my phone back into my pocket, looking at shawn.

"is everything okay?" shawn asks me softly, looking down at me, concern filling his expression.

"y-yeah." i put on a fake smile, nodding. shawn shakes his head at me, rubbing my back softly, sending chills down my spine.

"i'm sorry." he says softly to me.

"it's not your fault, don't worry." i say, trying to ignore the situation.

"anya, is he controlling? like abusive controlling?" shawn asks me carefully, as i shake my head immediately.

"w-we just fought before i flew out. nothing too big, don't worry." i shrug, looking away from him. "come on, let's go, i wanna see aaliyah."

"anya, you do know i'm always here if you want to talk, yeah?" shawn tells me softly, squeezing my arm gently. i nod, plastering on a smile, before walking out of my hotel room, shawn following close behind.
-
"hi mum," shawn says, as he walks into the kitchen, leaving me in the hallway. "ooh, something smells good."

"don't you have your own kitchen to cook?" i hear aaliyah reply tiredly, making me chuckle to myself.

"shut up." shawn mumbles back. "anyway, i have a surprise for you guys, let me just go get it." shawn says, exiting the kitchen and grabbing me by the arm.

"please don't be another guitar you have to store here because your- oh my gosh, anya!" aaliyah squeals, jumping up and rushing to me, hugging me tightly, almost knocking me over.

"hey liyah." i chuckle, hugging her back.

"i have so much to tell you! can we go upstairs? come on, i have something i want to show you-"

"let the girl breathe, aaliyah." karen laughs, as aaliyah lets go of me. "hi sweetie, how are you?"

"hey karen, i'm good, how are you?" i say, embracing shawns mother, as she hugs me back.

"good, thank you." she chuckles, pulling away from the hug. i stand back next to shawn, as he sends me a smile.

"wait- are you two...?" aaliyah trails off.

"oh, no!" i quickly say. "no, i'm just here for the john concert tomorrow, but i wanted to see you so i asked shawn to take me." i shrug. "also my hotel messed up my booking so i stayed with him last night."

"yeah, uh, about that mum," shawn begins, scratching the back of his head. "i sort of have a girlfriend?"

"shawn!" i moan at him, slapping his arm, knowing that his girlfriend didn't want him to say anything.

"chill, i texted her and she said we should tell our parents." he tells me. "so, uh, yeah."

"well who is the girl?" karen asks, chuckling softly. "you should bring her for dinner soon."

"y-yeah, i will." he blushes. "her names sydney, she's younger- but that doesn't matter." he quickly says.

"how much younger?" aaliyah asks curiously, sitting on the counter.

"she's 18 in september, so two years." shawn bites his lower lip. "please don't judge, i-i love her."

"how long have you two been together?" karen asks him, a small smile on her lips.

"since february, so coming up to four months." shawn says, his cheeks pinched pink, and a happy expression on his face. "she makes me happy, mum."

"i'm glad." karen smiles.

"me too." aaliyah says, smiling gently at shawn. "anya, can i show you this eyeshadow palette i bought recently? i don't know if i like it, can you help me with some looks?"

"yeah sure," i nod, as aaliyah jumps off the counter, dragging me upstairs to her room, shutting the door firmly behind her.

"my brother is such an idiot." she groans, flopping down on her bed. "by the way there's no eyeshadow, i just needed to talk."

"i figured." i laugh. "aaliyah, he's in love, he's so happy." i say to her.

"no, he isn't." she states. "he's in love with the concept of love. no one has shown him love like you have. have you seen the lyrics he's written recently? they really don't show the love compared to the love he gave you. some of the lyrics make me want to slap myself, he's not getting the love out there because he's so preoccupied in loving love!" she groans, taking a long breath.

"aaliyah, he's over me, i'm over him." i say to her.

"you may be over each other, but shawn is not in love with that girl, whoever she is." she says, standing up. "either way i'm happy for him, i just didn't want you to believe the bullshit he's coming up with."

"okay since when did you start swearing?" i chuckle, making her roll her eyes.

"have you met my brother?" she teases, making me laugh. "god, he's so stupid."

"why is he so in love with love though?" i ask her, sitting on her bed.

"because he misses love. it's obvious." she reaches under her bed, pulling out one of shawns notebooks.

"what the hell, aaliyah?" i ask, chuckling lightly.

"what? he leaves random things in my room and you don't expect me to snoop?" she says, flicking through the book, opening it to a page. i notice it's the one i bought him for our first christmas, and i smile softly, as aaliyah hands me the book. "read this." i scan my eyes over the lyrics, understanding what she is saying.

"he wrote this four days ago." she says to me, as i hand her back the book. "anya, he's so stupid."

"oh don't worry, i know." i laugh. "but he seemed so in love, and so happy. i know that look, it's the look he used to give me." i say softly.

"hunny, he looks at guitars that way." aaliyah mentions. "he looked at you differently."

"aaliyah-"

"i'm not saying for you to urge him to love you again, but can you at least ask him about it? i know he won't get mad at you." aaliyah begs.

"fine." i say with a sigh, as she smiles gratefully at me. "i'll ask him about it at some stage."

"ask him when he's tipsy, you'll get a lot out of that." she adds. "ask him tomorrow, he definitely will be getting tipsy."

"okay." i sigh, folding my arms. "i'll ask him then."

if aaliyah is right, and shawn is really in love
with the concept of love, why does he seem so happy about it?