Ivel's POV

Jade hasn't moved, when it was time to leave the hospital I had to carry her to the car, the entire time she didn't acknowledge that I was there. I tried to talk to her but she kept looking at the window with the same blank expression. She never cried, never looked at me. I carried her out of the car and into the house. I placed her on the couch and made dinner, she didn't eat for a while she must be starving.

"Jade I made you some mac and cheese. I know that it's your favourite." Jade turned to look at me then looked back at the wall. I sighed and placed her food on the table in front of her. I went up to the bedroom to do something I haven't done in a long, cry. Maybe Jade needed some space to think things through. I've been worrying so much about Jade that I didn't get to mourn the loss of what could have been my Hope.

I want Jade to get better soon. Maybe she just needs more time, maybe she's trying to figure out how to cope or could this be her way of coping? Maybe she's blaming herself for what's happen. No she wouldn't, the doctor even said that it wasn't her fault.

I wonder what she's thinking about? When I was a child I always thought being able to read someone's mind was stupid, you would see if they actually cared for you or if they just say that out of pity and it would end up destroying you. I would do anything to know what Jade is thinking even if it hurt me.

I know it may seem selfish but I needed Jade to get better so that she can help me. She's always been the one comforting me even if I tell her to go away, but right now she's the one who probably needs my help and I don't know what to do. All I can do is hope that she gets better.

The funeral was a week ago and she wasn't there. I could've dragged her there but she wouldn't budge she just ignored me and stared at the wall. Everyone at the funeral said that Jade is a terrible person for not being at her child's funeral. I should've spoken up but a part of me thought that they were right. Why am I thinking this? Jade loved our child and was counting down the days till she got to see her. Jade is an amazing person who loved our child right?

Wrong. 2 weeks, 2 weeks since our child died and she hasn't even moved a muscle. What is wrong with her? I tried comforting her, I really did, and she still hasn't even acknowledged my existence. I fed her, bathed her and more and she still acts like I'm not even around. Worst of all she hasn't even acknowledged that our child died. Does she not care that our flesh and blood died?

I know it is selfish but I want to see her cry. I want to see her emotionally break down. I want her to go through what I have been going through for the past weeks. I am willing to do anything to make her cry even if it breaks her.

I'm not thinking straight but I don't care. I march downstairs to the living room where Jade has been sitting on the couch looking at the wall like it was her favourite TV show for the past 2 weeks.

"What is your problem?" I yell. She turns her head and faces towards me. "You didn't even care about her, did you?" She's looking at me but is still not giving me an answer. I have had it. Weeks of her ignoring me is taking a toll on me and making me say things that I will regret later but right now I just need someone to take my anger out on.

"It was all your fault! Hope is lucky that she died so that she didn't have to deal with you! You're a terrible mother!" I storm off to the bedroom​ but out of the corner of my eye I see Jade with tears in her eyes.

When I got to the bedroom I immediately break down. What did I just do? I made her cry but I don't feel satisfied at all, all I feel is regret. Funny how love works, I say all those things to get a reaction from her but now I would do anything to get her to stop crying. I took all my stress and anger out on her when she was probably feeling just as bad as me or maybe even worse.

I mentally plan how to apologize to her then I walk downstairs to the living room. When I get there I'm shocked to see that Jade isn't there. Where did she go? Did she leave me? I search around the house. A few minutes later I hear crying coming from what would have been our daughter's bedroom.

I knocked on the door "Jade?" I asked. "Jade are you okay?"

Bam Bam Bam. The sound of gunshots was all that I got as a response.