Izzy

"I don't know why you're so hell-bent on passing this stupid test." Willow rolls her eyes as she applies a second coat of lipgloss, smacking her lips together before she drops the tube back into her purse. "You've never been worried about passing before. You're like, the smartest person in our class."

I swirl my fork around my untouched chef salad, letting the slightly cool autumn breeze hit my skin. The sun is out today in the quad, shining down on my face as I welcome the first hints of fall weather. No one, not even Willow's snide comments is going to bring me down.

"Studying isn't a bad thing," Christy snaps towards her. She points to my textbook sprawled out in front of me and sends me a large grin. "I'm proud of you, Izzy. I've never seen you so serious about something before."

Right. Because I'm known for my flaky, nonchalant, couldn't-give-two-fucks energy around here. I'm the popular girl with no depth to her, and for the longest time I was fine with that, but now...

Willow scoffs. "She was never like this until that nerd came around. Now we're becoming the study table with textbooks surrounding us."

Zane slips in beside me, throwing an arm over my shoulder. His familiar scent floods my nose, fresh and minty. "Ladies." He nods to my friends and then plants a kiss on my lips. "Are you ready for the party this weekend?"

Another party? I don't know how I never noticed before that partying is quite literally all I ever do, but I find myself sharing the same expression as Christy. Maybe she wasn't being a party pooper after all. Maybe, there are better things to do in life aside from drinking and fucking.

"Is that even a question you have to ask?" Willow bats her eyelashes toward him. "Of course, I'm going. It's your fuck buddy here that needs some convincing."

He arches a brow at me. "You aren't going?"

There are so many questions I want to ask. Such as, why is he in such a good mood when only a few days ago it seemed like some serious shit was going down at his house? When I tried to bring it up again the following day, I was quickly shut down. Now he seems like he's back to normal. I don't get it, and I'm also not appreciating the fact that I want to know more about him, which has never happened before, either. I don't feel that physical connection between us anymore that used to be there. The one that told me it didn't matter that we hardly knew each other before he got into my pants.

"I have other plans," I admit.

"With Mason fucking West," Willow adds.

"What is wrong with Mason?" Christy asks with a mouthful of a turkey sandwich. "Just because he doesn't go to the parties you go to doesn't mean he isn't cool."

Willow laughs. "That's exactly what it means."

"So, what? Do you think I'm not cool, then? Because I don't go to those stupid parties, either."

The tension is thick as Willow blinks absently at her, and then she says something she definitely should have kept to herself. "I tried telling Izzy plenty of times not to let you into our friend group, but she insisted you stay. I don't hang around people who study in their free time and go to bible group meetings at night. So, to answer your question, Christy, yes. I think you're as lame as it gets."

The paper bag Christy brought her sandwich in gets crumpled up and chucked at Willow's head, breadcrumbs getting into her hair before she storms off to head back inside. I watch her ponytail sway behind her, fists clenched at her sides before I narrow my eyes on Willow. "What the hell is wrong with you? She didn't deserve that."

Willow shrugs, attempting to pick the crumbs out of her hair. "She asked a question. She got an answer."

"It'll be fine, babe. She'll get over it. You know Christy is sensitive." Zane squeezes my shoulder, but I still can't seem to relax. "Now why are you hanging out with Mason West? This is news."

"Relax. I told him I'd take him out to get him away from his boring life of studying. It's not a big deal."

"Except it is a big deal," Willow snaps. "Why do you care? Why are you hanging around him so much?"

I can't tell them he blackmailed me. I can't tell them that my entire future is literally sitting in his hands. Granted, I don't have to take him out this weekend, but I want to, especially since he bailed this past weekend after my first attempt. I don't want to assume it had something to do with Zane calling me before I left the library on Friday, but the look on Mason's face was pure jealousy. I don't blame him for canceling on me.

He's not going to this time though. Mason West is the only boy who has ever turned me down. Twice. I'm going to fix that if it's the last thing I do.

"As long as he doesn't make a move on you then I'm fine with it," Zane says, thankfully avoiding her question. "I'm not worried in the least bit."

I whirl my head to his, suddenly interested in that little statement. At the party he threw at his house last week he had his hands all over girls in bikinis, so why are the rules in this agreement between us different for me?

Crossing my arms over my chest, I cock my head to the side. "And if he did make a move? I was under the impression that we could do whatever we wanted. We aren't together, right?"

Zane narrows his eyes, but they're so dark that I can't make out the expression they're filled with. "Right, but that agreement also consists of us not having sex with anyone else if I'm not mistaken."

I nod. "Glad we're on the same page then. Anyway, I'd better be going. I have a meeting to get to." I start to gather all of the textbooks surrounding me, and Willow throws up her hands in frustration.

"What meeting?" She calls after me. "You've never had a meeting! This is our time to braid each other's hair!"

***

The room Mason told me to meet him in was located in a section of the school I'd never been in before. Probably because it was where all the clubs got together after school. Math club, debate team, science club, all of the clubs I'd never been a part of.

I crack the door open, surprised to find Mason sitting behind a desk where a teacher should be. He looks hot as fuck as he rummages through different papers, his backpack placed beside him on the floor. The lights are dim, and there's a soft pattering of water flowing through a speaker. "Are you running a yoga class?" I ask.

He points to a bean bag chair in the corner of the room. "Sit down," he says, but his tone is so... authoritative. Fucking hell. My thighs clench across the room before I plop down into said chair. "We're in the testing center. Have you been here before?"

I shoot him a knowing glance. "Obviously not since I've paid my way through my classes thus far. I didn't even know this place existed."

He nods and rises from his chair behind the desk, carrying a clipboard and a pen in hand over to me. "Test anxiety is really common, just so you know, especially since you have dyslexia. The testing center is used to try and make you more relaxed while taking exams, so we're going to try one of my pop quizzes in here and see if it makes a difference."

I'm comfortable as hell in the bean bag chair as I take the clipboard from him, and I watch as he puts a couple of drops into an incense burner. "Lavender," he says. "For an added burst of relaxation."

"Why?" The question falls out of my mouth before I can stop it. My vision is blurred as I glance around the room and attempt to get a grip on myself.

"Studies have proven that incense can—"

"No, I mean why do this for me? Why go to all of this trouble just to try and help me? This can't all be for your college transcript. You could have just ratted me out and that would have been the end of it. I don't understand why you're doing this."

His eyes linger on mine for what feels like an eternity. The quiet pattering of the water and the burning incense do nothing for my racing heart. "Just because you struggle with reading doesn't mean you can't be just as smart as everyone else. You're smarter than you give yourself credit for, and I guess I want to be there when you finally realize that. Underneath all of that cool girl facade is a genuine person that I'm starting to enjoy getting to know."

Damn him. Damn him and his nice words.

"I'm still bat shit crazy, you know. The whole paying-to-pass thing might be a facade, but I do enjoy a good party now and then and a cigarette. I'll always be a wild child at heart."

He smirks. "I know you are. You always have been. In the third grade, you asked all of the popular boys for their lollipops that came in their Valentine's Day treat bags and resold them each for fifty cents at recess to make money for yourself."

I laugh at the memory. My mom had been so pissed. My dad, however, was slightly impressed. "Just how long have you been paying attention to me, Mason?"

His eyes rake down my legs, which are in another pair of tights—these with polka dots—and I'm beginning to think the answer to that question is a long, long time. He stares at me like he wants to fully devour me. Completely and wholly. And my body is screaming yes. "A lot longer than you think, Izzy. Now start your quiz."

How am I supposed to be thinking about anything else but that? Mason opens a textbook of his own to end the discussion, so with a frustrated sigh, I tap my pen on the clipboard and get to work.

The sound of the water is calming, and I wiggle my way deeper into the bean bag, surrounded by pillows and the smell of lavender. I haven't been relaxed all day, yet sitting here with Mason I'm feeling content. More than content. He glances up from his textbook and offers me a reassuring smile, causing my heart to lurch into my throat. Fuck. I think I want him.

Not date him.

I won't let myself become that attached.

But I want to fuck him.

Right on that desk.

I wonder what's underneath his facade? The one who pretends school is all that matters to him? Is he a wild child too underneath it all?

Focus! My subconscious snaps. Ugh. Right.

The test.

***

"Just spare me the news," I groan. "Just mark a big fat F on it and throw it in the garbage. I'll take it home and burn it later."

Mason's lips twitch, threatening a smile. "Or hang it on your fridge." He flips the paper over and an A shining as bright as the sun is staring back at me. I almost don't believe it. There's no way. "Just let your teachers know you'd rather take your tests here. It shouldn't be an issue. We'll make sure we study beforehand, and as long as you keep doing what you're doing, you'll pass with flying colors."

"I passed," I say, still in shock. "I actually passed?"

He nods. "You didn't just pass, Izzy. You got all of them right."

"Oh my god!" I fling myself up from the bean bag and launch myself into his arms. Mason clings to my back and envelops me in a huge bear hug that becomes much more intimate within seconds. I pull myself completely up against him, my chest pressed against his, and one of his hands is grazing my rib cage, just underneath my breast. "I—Thank you," I tell him. "I couldn't have done any of this without you."

My heart is thundering inside of my chest, the blood roaring in my ears as he says something back to me, but I can't hear a damn thing. I'm only focused on his plump, full lips when his tongue darts out to wet them, and then I do something that I will most definitely regret.

I tug him towards me and press my lips against his. I'm expecting him to pull away like he did that night of the party, but instead, he sighs in relief and tugs me closer. This kiss isn't what I'm expecting at all. It's rough and possessive, and totally rocking me off-kilter.

Mason West is a wild child after all, but in the best, most secretive way.

He grabs the end of my ponytail and tugs to make my face tilt more up to his, and then he adds tongue, backing me up towards the desk. My body is melting right into his, letting him do whatever it is he wants with me as my ass hits the desk. His hands are placed on either side of my body, gripping the edges of the desk with so much force that his knuckles are turning white.

Nothing has ever felt this good. I let out a moan and Mason sighs, moving his kisses to my neck. He licks and sucks his way down expertly—like we've done this a thousand times and know exactly what each other needs.

"My god," Mason groans, pushing his hand up my skirt to trace the pattern of my tights. My head is thrown back in ecstasy until I hear him heave out a sigh and step away from me, the loss of contact leaving me feeling more alone than I've ever wanted to.

I'm barely holding myself up on the desk, my thighs parted for him as I pant deeply in and out, scanning his eyes for some sort of explanation. He can't possibly reject me for a third time, right? I don't think my ego will be able to take the hit.

"Zane," he says roughly, running a hand through his hair. "I—We can't. Not when you're still with someone else."

"I'm not with him," I say. "I already told you we're not dating."

"But you do stuff with him, Izzy, and now I'm your tutor, so things are complicated, and—"

I reach out to grab his arm, but he takes another step away from me. "It doesn't have to be complicated. Kissing isn't going to kill anyone."

"But that's the thing. I know you're a wild child, and I accept that, but I'm not willing to date a wild child because I'm not okay with what you two are doing. I don't mess around just for fun. I take relationships seriously, and you are a casual dater. There's nothing wrong with that, but I'm not going to get attached here, and if we continue this, then I'm doomed."

I gulp and break eye contact with him to stare at the ground. There's nothing I can say to defend myself because he's right. I love attention from boys. I love to see just how riled up I can make them. Getting involved with Mason would only break his heart, which I knew from the start, but that kiss...

"You're right," I admit. "I'm so sorry for kissing you. I shouldn't have."

"Don't be sorry. That kiss was..."

"Yeah," I finish for him. "I know."

He grabs his backpack off the ground and attempts to clear his throat from the awkwardness or the tension, I'm not sure which, but before he can speak I ask, "Does this mean you aren't going to be my tutor now?"

When he laughs, the pressure releases just slightly in my chest. "You're not getting out of this that easily. One kiss isn't going to break our agreement."

"And what about me taking you somewhere this weekend? Is that off the table now too?"

He rolls his eyes. "So long as you can keep your lips off of me then no, it's not off the table."

"You sure? Because you bailed last weekend out of pure jealousy. Sorry for wanting to double-check."

"I was not jealous."

Nodding slowly, clearly not believing him, I start to make my way toward the door. "Right. So that big miserable dark cloud over your head didn't appear right after Zane called me. I must have just imagined it."

"Clearly," he says.

I'm learning that this is what we do best. Crack jokes to deflect how we're honestly feeling. I'm not sure how continuing this friendship with Mason will work, but for now, being around him somewhat is better than not being around him at all.

I'll just have to accept whatever repercussions will follow.