(Published on 30 January 2020
Edited on 2 February 2020)

I am everything to you even though we are just friends.

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FORTH'S POV

​People say that time heals everything. That's what I feel for Wayo. Without the Campus Moon and Star competition and without having to meet him, slowly my feeling also disappeared. Besides, as Beam said, being broken heart is not my style. There are still many cute boys and sexy girls out there that I can seek.

"Hey Forth.. Finally you came ha" Lam patted my shoulder when I joined them at the bar.

"I'm not like you guys whose main job is drinking," I taunted.

"Damn," Lam said irritably, but he offered me a beer bottle. I took the beer bottle from his hand and cheered with Lam. The sound of bottles clinking were heard.

"Tsk.. Look at that... That's the fifth girl," Mark said. I glanced at the direction Mark was pointing. I was surprised to see Beam sitting in a corner of the room alone. A girl was sitting on his lap and was whispering something. Beam looked at her and gently caressed her cheeks. But the expression on his face showed rejection. Beam whispered something to the girl. I could not see the expression on his face but after that the girl left Beam. The girl glanced at me as she passed our table.

"Damn. He has already rejected five girls in 30 minutes." Mark shook his head and looked closely at Beam.

"If I were him, I would take them all home," Mark said as he licked his lips wet. I smacked his head with a little bit of force.

"No wonder. You will screw anyone as long as she's a girl," mocked Earth.

"Besides can you even handle five girls in one night and don't talk as if you have more experience than this man" Lam patted my shoulder.

"Damn it, Ai'Lam," I replied irritably.

I have been watching Beam. He was not aware of my presence and was busy in his own world. He showed the same expression that night. The expression of hurt. My curiosity was increasing thinking who can make a casanova like Beam break his heart.

"Hey... If you are worried about him, why don't you bring him here?" Lam suddenly elbowed me and that made me realize that I was zoning out while thinking about Beam.

"Who?" I asked confused.

"Aish.. This is the reason why Phana got Wayo first. You are so slow Forth," Mark looked furious.

I chuckled after hearing that.

"Get him here, so the girls will at least glance at our table," Mark's words made me hit his head again.

My engineering gang is no more than a group of boys with excessive testosterone and muscle tone. Sometimes their conversation is not far from the girls and the bed. That's why I preferred to be alone when I was broken hearted. But Beam and the gang are different. Phana and Kit will not let Beam break his heart alone like this. Unless they are unaware of it. Maybe Beam covered up being broken heart from them very well.

I got up and walked towards Beam. I can hear my friends cheering up for me in the back. And that caught Beam's attention. He looked at us and smiled.

"Ai'Forth.. What are you doing here?" Beam asked in surprise.

"Drinking, what else" I replied. I sat beside him and looked at the pile of beer bottles on his table.

"Wanna join us?" I asked.

He looked at me doubtfully for a moment, then shook his head.

"Come on. Drinking alone isn't fun. At least their stupid talk will make you forget your broken heart," I said.

Beam laughed.

"Broken hearted? Me?" He evaded the subject skillfully. But his eyes spoke differently. His eyes that usually look cheerful had a different emotion.

"Come on, join us. At least we are very good at terrifying girls," I tried to reason. He looked at me while raising his eyebrows.

He looked doubtful for a moment, but then he stood up and looked at me.

"What are you waiting for?" He said because I was still sitting silently. I stood up at once and walked towards my table. Beam follows me behind.

"Oh ho... Five girls failed to make Khun Baramee get up from his chair but Khun Jaturapoom was different" Mark teased when Beam arrived at our table. Beam stared in surprise at Mark. I kicked Mark so he moved from his seat to make space for Beam to sit.

"This dirty mouth is Mark. You already know Lam and Earth. They are Korn, Knock and New," I introduced Beam to them one by one.

Mark tapped the chair next to him. Beam looked at me doubtfully. Seeing me smile, he just rolled his eyes and sat down. I sat in front of Beam.

"So what were you fussing about earlier?" Beam asked. He took a bottle of beer and drank it.

"We're talking about you," Lam said. Beam glanced at him and smiled.

"Um.. I didn't know that I was so famous that even men talked about me," Beam said casually, making all my friends curse.

"Ai'Mark wants to know how you can get girls to come to you without you having to do anything," Earth said.

Mark showered Earth with peanut shells.

"Don't use me as a reason, you asshole," Mark protested.

Beam just shook his head looking at the two of them.

"Uhm..To get girls you just have to be.." He paused for a moment to make the whole table quiet and pay attention.

"Born handsome like me," He said, forming a 'V' with his thumb and forefinger under his chin. His words made my friends swear. I was literally laughing my ass off looking at my friends. Beam is very interesting. He is not rigid like a medical student in general and he is also not afraid of the looks of my friends. He even teased them back.

But somehow I can still see it. The hurt in his eyes. Although he laughed and joked with my friends, he always showed that expression every time he drank from his bottle. An expression that makes my mind uneasy every time I see it.

"That's enough.." I said, pulling the beer bottle from Beam's hand. Beam looked at me frowning.

"Hey Ai'Forth. Come on, it's still 11," Mark said.

"Beam has a lecture in the morning and he drank quite a lot. He also have to drive back to his dorm room," I said. Beam looked at me annoyed.

"I'm fine. This is not much though," He said. He pointed his hand at me asking for the beer bottle but he was too drunk to see where he was pointing his hand at.

"Get up and go home or I'll call Phana" I said.

Hearing my words, Beam looked at me with an angry face and stood up. But it seems like he was too drunk because he could not stand up straight.

Mark, Lam and I reflexively stood up to hold him.

"I'm fine. No need to panic," He said as he tried to stand up properly. He laughed when he managed to stand still.

"Looks like Ai'Beam is drunk," Lam whispered. I nodded.

"Ai'Beam. Give me your car key," I said.

He looked at me confused. "What for?" He asked in annoyance.

"I'll take you home," I said. Beam laughed at me instead.

"I can go alone," He said stubbornly. But after taking a few steps, he was almost falling to the floor with his face first. I managed to grab him by his waist and made him stand straight. He looked at my face which was only a few inches from his face. When Beam said that he was handsome, no one would argue with him because he was telling the truth. The man in front of me definitely has an amazing face.

"Ehem.. Hey." I heard the sound of my friends calling from behind making me release my grip on Beam. Beam managed to stand tall.

"Your key," I reached out and looked at Beam impatiently. He looked annoyingly at me before handing me his car keys.

"Ai'Lam," I said, glancing at him. Lam nodded and took his jacket. Beam staggered toward the parking lot.

"Where is your car?" I asked. Beam looks around confusingly. I rolled my eyes and pressed the unlock button. I hear an SUV's alarm sound when I press the unlock button. Beam's car is parked to the right side of the bar. I pulled Beam impatiently and made him sit in the passenger seat. He did not protest. He looked at me when I put his seat belt on.

"Mm.. What?" I asked.

"You are like my grandfather," He said with a laugh.

I smiled. "Do I look that old?" I said. He shook his head. "It's not like that, he's a kind and considerate man," He said. Somehow his words made my cheeks heat up. Beam may not realize it but he is very cheesy. Sweet words flowed from his lips like water falling off from the stream. No wonder people misunderstand and fall in love with him.

"Thank you, but save your pick up lines for the girls," I said, closing the passenger door and walking toward the driver's seat. As I started the engine, suddenly the song 'Room 39 - Everything' started playing.

I have been everything for you
Though we would never been anything more than friends
I'm just someone who you want sometimes
It's been good enough so far
I've been everything for you
Though we would never been anything more than friends
Because I have no rights to expect anything more than this
It's been good enough so far
Why would I want anything else?

I raise my eyebrows when I hear the song. Beam glared at me before turning off the music player. We were silent for a few moments.

"Do you want us to stay here?" He asked sarcastically. It made me realize that I haven't drive the car from the parking lot after starting the engine. Beam heave a sigh of relief as I started driving.

"Ehm.. That's a pretty sad song," I said.

Beam stares out the window. "None of your business."

I started laughing. He was like a child suspected of committing a crime but didn't want to admit it.

"You can talk about it if you want. I'm a pretty good listener," I said as I continued to concentrate on my driving.

Beam turned around and looked at me. I can feel his sharp gaze.

"I take my words back about you that you are a kind and considerate man. You are hella annoying and the most nosiest person," He said. I laughed again at his childish comment.

"Hey.. I'm helping you here. That's how you talk to people who intend to help you," I pretended to be annoyed. Beam turned around and looked out of the window. We were silent for a few moments.

"Kit and Ming are dating," He said suddenly. I turned my eyes from the road and looked at him.

"Forth look ahead!" he shouted. I muttered an apology and looked back at the road.

"Good, isn't it? Isn't that what you want. He is serious about Kit," I said.

Beam began to look out the window of the car again. This time, he raised his legs bringing it close to his chest and hugged his knees.

"Ehm. Good. I'm glad to hear that," He murmured softly. But he sounded sincere.

"Hey Ai'Forth.. How about you and Wayo?" He asked suddenly. He changed the subject suddenly. I paused and glanced at him for a moment. Beam looked at me hopefully.

"I stopped chasing him. Right now I just hope he is happy with Phana. And I don't think about it that much," I said.

Beam looked at me and said nothing. I felt my cheeks getting hot because he kept on staring at me. Then he let out a long sigh.

"It's easy for you because you don't see him everyday," he said. I looked at him for a moment he looked desperate. He hugged his knees tightly. Burying his face in between his knees.

"Maybe" I replied.

Beam paused. He didn't comment again.

"Then, isn't it easy for you, seeing them everyday," I asked. Beam raised his face and looked at me. Due to darkness, I couldn't decipher the exact expression of his face.

"W-What do you mean? W-who?" he asked frantically.

"Whoever made you drink so many bottles, made you reject girl after girl and made you listen to heart broken songs along the way," I said. Although I can guess who that person is. Between Ming and Kit, it's most likely that only Kit can make the guy next to me who always looks cheerful become so emotional and chaotic.

"Don't make any assumptions Ai'Forth. I'm warning you," he said. I raised my hands and said "Whatever."

After that we didn't talk anymore. The silence in car was not awkward kind of one. It's just we both were in our own thoughts. When we arrived at Beam's dorm, I handed him the car keys. He was looking better and can stand tall now.

"Are you OK? Want me to take you up to your room?" I asked. He was looking everywhere not at me and shook his head.

"Then see you later na ~" Saying so I started to walk away. Lam was waiting for me by the other side of the road.

When I just took a few steps I felt someone pulling my shirt. I turned around and saw it was Beam. He looked at me for a moment then looked away.

"Th-thank you," He said awkwardly.

I smiled and ruffled his hair.

"No problem. If you want to drink and have no friends, then call me. Oh this saturday, we are having a drinking party at Lam's house. If you want, you can join us," I said. He just nodded his head while looking at the ground. It seems like the paving block under his feet is more attractive than my face.

After Beam didn't say anything I walked back to Lam. Lam gave me a helmet and let me drive my bike. I looked at Beam who was still standing in the parking lot then waved at him. He raised his hand briefly waving back. Then I drove my bike back to the bar.

"You guys look cute together," Lam suddenly said.

I smiled hearing that.

"You know that he doesn't like men," I replied.

"Um... But you didn't deny it. So if he likes men, will you chase him?"

I stared at Lam's face through the rearview mirror. He showed me his mischievous smile.

"You know that I won't touch my own friend," I said irritatingly.

"Oh yeah. I thought you would hunt down anyone who piques your interest," he mocked.

"Get off... Get off now" I said, pretending to lower the speed of my bike. He held tight to my waist.

"Sorry... Sorry... I won't say anything else," he said. I laughed teasingly and raised the speed of my bike again.

Published on 30 January 2020
Edited on 2 February 2020