Ronan              Paris

Today 12:56pm

Paris
Paris
Paris
Paris
Paris
Paris

  OH MY GOSH WHAT DO YOU WANT YOU ANNOYING CHILD

THERES SOMETHING SO IMPORTANT YOU NEED TO SEE

  What? What happened

I made
The
Most
Amazing
Accomplishment
E
V
E
R

  WELL WHAT IS IT ALREADY!?

Look.

  ...

...

  Are you kidding me right now, Ro.

😛

  You're ...
An idiot

Hey that took me FOREVER

  Who even dabs anymore

  Me apparently

  So this is what you do when you skip school?

Uhhhhh
Not always

  Sure 🙄
Well I'm going to get back to actual real life now. Bye.

Awe come on
At least congratulate me.

  Congratulations on being a doofus

Hey thanks 😁
read 1:32 pm

Today 6:30pm

  My dad wants you to come to dinner

Do YOU want me to come to dinner?

  I mean...sure

Ugh when are you going to stop doing this?

  Doing what

Pretending that you don't like me or hanging out with me and denying everything until finally agreeing after I beg you?
The cycle...ends here 🙃

  🙄fine
I want you to come to dinner please.
It's taco night

Yessss
Oh how I've missed taco nights
I'll be right over

  Bring that tub of ice cream we bought the other night.

...
Can't

Why!?

I kinda
Sorta
Ate it?

  That was a gallon of ice cream

So

  ...
Okay just get over here

Oki

Stop it that's my thing

What's yours is mine 😏

  We're not married you butt

Ooh
You said butt.
I like it 😛

  Ew you sicko

And yeah of course we're married.
I have the certificate to prove it.

  Yeah sure.
Be careful there, Pinocchio, your nose is lookin pretty long from here 🤥

Honey, I can't believe you don't remember.
Vegas?
You got super drunk and proposed and because of my secret love for you, I blindly agreed?
If I'd known you would deny the whole thing I would have never taken you on that romantic honeymoon in the mountains.

  Yep you got me I'm just using you for your money even though my dad is filthy rich

Yep
Well, a greedy women never has enough.

Well maybe if you'd pay more attention to me instead of going and betting on races every weekend, we'd have a healthy marriage.

What?
You know I can't give up my hobbies. I'm a man and I need somewhere to put my creative energy.

  Use it on the family?

You mean use it on you? 😛

  Ew no.
We no longer have any sort of romantic relationship ever since you cheated on me with the maid.

It was the nanny.
Shows how much you know.

  Ugh why did I ever go to Vegas?

Oh screw it, baby, I miss you.
Let's forget all about our issues and be young lovers once again.

  Does that offer come with a new diamond added to my wedding ring?

Only if you let me slip it on that finger one more time.

  You can't mean...

Yes.
Paris, honey, will you marry me?
Again?

  Oh Ronan!

Is that a yes?

No that's a no.
I want a divorce and I'm taking the beach house in Peru.

Oh...
Can I still have tacos?

  Sure come on over

That's all I need to hear 😛

* * *

I apologize for being so weird