The party was fucking chaos.

There were way too many people invading the space around me. The claustrophobia was sucking all the air out of my lungs until I was suffocating like a fish out of water.

I raised the bottle and took another swig to dull my overwhelmed senses.

Nothing I snorted or drank tonight came close to helping my nerves. Only one thing on this Earth could take away this feeling—and it wasn't hiding in the bottom of my bottle.

I had been waiting for three hours since the party started for any sign of Riley. I circled the door for the first two hours, watching it, impatiently waiting for the tiny blond to walk through.

Brynn told me she would get Riley here no matter how she had to do it. She mentioned not telling Riley I would be there, which I shut down immediately before she had time to object.

Tricking Riley was the last thing I wanted to do, even if my last bit of humanity melted away every second that she wasn't by my side. I owed it to my beautiful girl to let her decide whether she wanted to see me or not.

It was a risky judgment call, but it had to be done if I wanted her back. I had to lock away the person I was and fight every natural urge to manipulate her to climb back between my sheets.

I had to be better this time around, or I would lose the best thing I ever had in my life.

Hopefully, Brynn will be able to come through and keep her promise to convince Riley to talk to me.

Before I left their apartment, I made a point to make Brynn swear one last time that she would tell Riley I was the one who asked them to come to the party tonight. My stupid ass had already surprised Riley once before and didn't want the shock of seeing me again to send her into a panic like the other night.

Riley was too skittish—she would run the second she laid eyes on me.

My heart was racing faster than my mind as I drained the last drop from the bottle of Jack in my hands. It was getting later and later, but I wasn't planning on moving from the door until she walked through it or the sun came up.

I was on a mission and failure was not an option for me.

My mind began zoning in and out of consciousness until my bladder suddenly informed me it was about to burst. My dick was standing straight up, completely filled to the tip. Even though I didn't want to move, I was going to piss my pants if I didn't.

I stood up from my seat and jogged up the stairs to hit the bathroom quickly. I would only be gone a minute from the door. There was no way she would be able to sneak in that fast.

I pushed through the small crowd of people waiting in line and flipped off a few girls who bitched at me. It was my fucking place. If I wanted to skip the line to use the bathroom, I was well within my rights.

The door opened and a curvy girl covered in tattoos wearing a painted-on dress stepped out. She stopped directly in front of me and boldly evaluated me from head to toe. She decided she liked what she saw and flipped her jet-black hair off her face. The girl batted her eyelashes up at me, wanting my full attention. Her dark lips began to move and jumbled, incoherent words poured out. I shoved her out of the way with my shoulder and bypassed her without even a second glance. When I turned around to shut the door, she had turned to follow me in. I shut the door in her face without hesitation.

The person I used to be would have dragged her inside behind me without even knowing her name. She would be on her knees for me in a few seconds.

Now, the girl wasn't even a tiny blip on my radar.

I went over to the toilet and unzipped my jeans to pull out my dick. I barely made it out in time before I let myself go. I placed my hand against the wall to steady myself as my body let out an involuntary shiver from the relief. Once done with my record-breaking piss, I fumbled for a few minutes trying to tuck myself back into my jeans. My ring accidentally got caught on my zipper when I wasn't paying attention and I almost lost it for good. I untangled it and then finished fastening my pants. Lastly,
I went to the sink to wash my hands and splashed some cold water on my face to wake myself up enough to get through the rest of the night.

It was time to return to the torturous waiting game.

I hurried back downstairs to return to my post, guarding the door, when I saw Brynn's reddish-brown locks out of my periphery. I started to follow her to ask her if she was able to get Riley to come when her mouth latched onto a guy with a green mohawk. She pulled away from him, spun around, and grabbed his arms to pull him closer. Brynn ground her ass against him and walked the poor schmuck to the darkened corner of the room.

The immediate ick factor had me gagging—better him than me. I could find Riley on my own.

I silently scanned the whole house for the next twenty minutes, looking for any sign of my girl. My height was helpful in my search, but there were so many goddamned people crammed into the tiny, dim place that it was hard to see more than a couple of feet in front of me.

I couldn't find Riley anywhere I looked. Tears began forming in the corner of my eyes when I realized she wasn't there. Riley had made her decision and it wasn't the one I wanted. The disappointment siphoned my will to keep going. The night was over for me—fuck, my whole life was over without her in it.

I was too big of a pussy to end things with one big gesture, so I would do the next best thing, which was to kill myself slowly.

Booze, pills—pills and booze until I snuffed my life out.

I weaved through the crowd, ignoring anyone who attempted to talk to me as I passed by. I shouldered my way around a few couples dancing and headed towards the area where Sean set up the liquor bottles to see what was left.

Over the top of the crowd, I saw the back of Sean's head next to the table. He was leaning down over the top of some girl. I couldn't get a good look at her except for the hemline of her dress. His hand went down to the bottom and he started to snake his fingers underneath. He stepped closer, making his move.

At least someone had some luck tonight.

Or did he?

His body shifted as he leaned in and I finally caught a glimpse of the blond girl standing next to him. I bit my tongue from screaming out in anger.

It was my blond girl.

Sean was attempting to fuck Riley.

Riley's larger-than-life green eyes widened, sparkling in the light as it danced around her. She chewed on her bottom lip and glanced around nervously like she was searching for someone.

It was me. Riley was looking for me.

When Sean lowered his head to steal the first kiss against her soft, pink lips, Riley froze in place.

My fists were balled up and ready to deliver a death blow to the back of his skull. I was across the room in less than a second, but it still wasn't going to be quick enough. I had to get both of their attention.

"I see you've met Riley," I growled out a warning to him over the noise of the party.

Riley dodged Sean at the last second and her eyes landed directly on mine. She looked confused, and her cheeks were flushed with heat.

"Oh shit, sorry, Ez. I had no idea." Sean gave a half-hearted attempt at an explanation.

His eyes trailed back over her body, landing directly at the bottom of her extremely short dress that ended high up on her thighs. He gave a mischievous smile as he pictured her without the dress.

Sean wanted to get his ass kicked tonight.

"So this is the infamous Riley." He purred as he fucked her with his eyes. "I'm Sean, Ezra's roommate. So, he finally got you to come home with him. I thought he was just making you up."

Sean raised his hand towards Riley and she jumped backwards. He chuckled when she flinched.

"It's ok. I won't bite you. Well, maybe I will if the big man over there says I can." Sean toyed with her.

Riley's stunned face found me, pleading with me to intervene. I could already see the drunken haze covering her eyes. She was already foggy and well on her way to passing out. I stared back at her silently and my shoulders fell. Drunk Riley did not make great decisions and right now Sean expected to be one of those bad decisions. Sean was already fixated on her and would be even more so now that he knew she was off-limits.

He didn't disprove my assumption when he began pouring more vodka into her glass.

"Drink up, kids, it's a party." Sean beamed at me and swallowed another shot of his own.

"I-I'm going to find Brynn." Riley slurred softly.

Sean stepped into Riley's path to block her from leaving. Riley's eyes darted back and forth between Sean and me. Sloshed Riley knew exactly what would happen to Sean if he didn't back away from her. I couldn't hide the surge of adrenaline pumping through me. I smiled at Riley to let her know I had everything under control.

There was nothing for her to worry about.

"You have to finish that first." Sean kept pressuring her.

Riley's eye flickered to me and she made one of her cute little pouty faces like she wanted the vodka. I raised my eyebrow to let her know I didn't care if she wanted to take it. She could have another one if she chose to. I would be there by her side to keep her safe.

Riley didn't immediately grab the glass, which surprised me.

"You heard the man. Drink up, Beautiful." I took another step up to the table and used my long arm to push the glass closer to her. Riley crossed her arms over her chest, which distracted me for a second when her cleavage spilled out a little over the top.

She was so fucking sexy even when she wasn't trying to be. The guy in my pants immediately hardened a little, twitching with excitement.

Sean was whispering in Riley's ear when her eyes widened. She quickly grabbed the double-shot glass in front of her and threw it back. She slammed it back down harder than necessary and I was surprised it survived. Her temper was fired up over what Sean said to her.

"Now, move." Riley dropped her shoulder into Sean to use her body weight to move him back. His expression held his amusement when she barely even fazed him. He was grinning until I caught his attention and raised my eyebrows, warning him. Sean understood the message and stepped back to allow her to pass.

He knew it was over with her and he needed to move on to the next girl.

"Ez, you need to put a leash on this one. I've got one upstairs if you want it." Sean joked and poured himself another shot. He was de-escalating in his own way to try to cut the tension between us.

"I've tried. She won't let me." I smiled, imagining how dirty Riley would look naked on all fours while I led her around. Riley was wild, adventurous, and more than willing to please me. I added the filthy image of her to my spank bank. It was now on my list of things to try with her at some point.

Riley went around the table to come over to me. I lifted my arm towards her, expecting her to tuck herself into me. Instead, she bypassed me without a second glance and I panicked, grabbing her wrist tightly.

"We need to talk." I reminded her as I readjusted my hold.

"Ezra, I have nothing to say to you. I already told you." She pulled back, fighting me, which struck me the wrong way.

I fucking lost it.

When I closed my eyes, Riley was still firmly in my grasp. When I opened them again, she was five steps away from me, trying to catch her breath. I felt the broken glass crunching beneath my boots and had no idea how it got there.

I wasn't sure how she even got away from me.

"Don't you ever touch me again!" Riley screamed at me.

"Just come here," I said softly and leaned up off the table. Whatever just happened, I had to apologize to her, but I needed her to touch me to help me calm down first.

Riley stepped away and I landed, hitting a bottle off the table and it went crashing to the floor. She bolted out of the room before I could stop her. Her hair bounced between bodies and I lost sight of her in the dense crowd.

"Shit." I cursed, pushing the hair back off my face. Sean was laughing hysterically at me and I turned around to glare at him.

"I can see why you like her. You better go find her before she finds someone else." Sean chuckled and poured himself another shot.