AUTHOR'S POV

~one month later~

It's been four weeks of uneasy adjustment for Laurent. Although he and Larry have divorced and gone their separate ways, with the exception of work, he ultimately decided against putting the house up for sale as it would have been very difficult to part with. Sure there are things around the house that remind him of their time together...but this home is near to perfection and he simply can't let it go. There's the most beautiful view of land and mountains from the backyard where many beautiful sunsets have occurred. It's mostly peaceful throughout the neighborhood but the features of the home itself are what drew him in when he and Larry first took a tour of the splendid palace. Of course thinking about he and Larry's early beginnings as well as their time here together leads the way to thinking about Larry and how it's been a full month yet still very shocking to know where it all ended up. In his heart he will always love Larry and there is a part of him that does miss what they had...but what he's found himself having the most difficulty with is knowing Larry goes home to Anthony every night. Laurent fell in love with Anthony and one month isn't enough to change that. Six months probably wouldn't change it. He thinks about him all the time so he does things to take his mind off of him as well as the time they've shared. Thankfully Shawn has been a strong force in his life and if it wasn't for him, Laurent isn't sure how well he would be holding up on his own. Shawn checks in with him everyday and when Laurent isn't working he makes sure to take him out so he can have fun. To be in such a big home with nothing but silence around him for the most part would make it too easy for Laurent's heart to become deeply saddened...constantly thinking about what transpired and the could haves or should haves. He and Larry had a joint photo shoot days ago and while they didn't say much to each other they were and remained cordial. Laurent saw a happiness on Larry's face which could only be the result of being with Anthony for it was the same glow Laurent felt whenever he was around him. He managed to keep it together while being in the same room with Larry and everyone a part of the photo shoot business wise...but on the inside it was beyond tough knowing that Anthony isn't a part of his life anymore. He was also conflicted by those emotions. On one hand he's happy that Larry is so happy with him...but on the other hand it was what Laurent wanted so it hurts deeply. All he can do is use each day he's given to keep pushing through and hope for the best. Now, it's evening and he's in the kitchen cooking himself dinner. He's so used to Larry being the one cooking he's had to self-teach. On the menu is a Cajun Shrimp Alfredo and with the recipe in front of him he follows each step carefully. He's proud of how far he's come with cooking lately. For the first week since the split it was mostly ordering food or sandwiches but by the second week he knew that he couldn't live off of those things any longer. He came to the realization that he will have to learn until love comes along again. He's tasting the made from scratch alfredo sauce for seasoning when the doorbell rings and he's certain that it's Shawn. He lowers the temperature on the sauce and grabs a towel to wipe his hands before going to answer. The moment he turns the corner he sees Shawn's silhouette through the front door and moments later he's opening to greet him...

Laurent: *smile* "Hey bro". 

Shawn: *smile* "What's up bro? You good"?

Laurent: "Yeah I'm just cooking some dinner. Come in". 

Shawn nods as he steps inside and as they engage in their usual bro hug Shawn's senses pick up the savory aroma...

Shawn: "It smells amazing in here. What are you cooking"?

Laurent: "I downloaded a recipe for Cajun Shrimp Alfredo". 

Shawn: "It sounds awesome".  

Laurent: *smile* "Thanks bro. It's almost done if you want to try it". 

Shawn: *smile* "I would love to".

Laurent: "Cool. Well come have a seat at the bar". 

Shawn happily follows him and he's excited about this new dish Laurent is whipping up while also happy that Laurent is seemingly getting better each time he sees him. He takes a seat at the bar and watches Laurent drape a hand towel over his shoulder and go right back to work. He stirs the alfredo sauce then begins cooking the shrimp as well as filling a large pot with water to boil the pasta. One would think he's already a pro in the kitchen with the way he's handling everything. Eventually Shawn stands up to retrieve the remote to turn the TV on the sports channel then grabs a drink from the fridge before taking his place back at the bar. As he sips his drink he's mentally going over what he really came over for. He's pitched the idea to Laurent before who wasn't so sure about it then but Shawn truly believes it's what he needs to heal and move on. He won't pressure him and he will make sure Laurent knows that's not what he's trying to do but he wants to see his friend doing well. He's not discounting how well he's doing of course. He just wants to see him soar as high as he knows he can. Eventually dinner is finished so Laurent makes Shawn a plate and places it in front of him. He will join him momentarily but he's anxious to get Shawn's opinion first. After a soft prayer Shawn swirls some pasta on his fork and picks up a piece of Shrimp then takes a bite. Laurent studies his face and after Shawn gulps it down...

Shawn: "Wow bro. That's amazing". 

Laurent: "Really"?

Shawn: "Yes it is". 

Laurent: *smile* "You're just saying that". 

Shawn: *chuckles* "I'm not just saying that bro. It really is amazing. The seasoning on the shrimp is just right and the noodles are perfect". 

Laurent: "Thanks bro".   

Shawn: "You're welcome". 

Beyond satisfied that Shawn enjoys it so much Laurent turns around to make his plate then takes the seat next to him. There are several moments of silence as they enjoy Laurent's delightful dish and he's internally smiling at Shawn enjoying it so much though Laurent is sure that he sees a hint of worry in Shawn's face. His immediate thought is something going on between him and Dani which he hopes it isn't...but whatever it is he will let Shawn bring it up. He asks if he can get him another helping of food or another drink to which Shawn accepts the drink. When they're finished Laurent clears the bar and begins cleaning up. With his back turned he doesn't see Shawn's face as if he's figuring out a way to start this conversation. Laurent has an inkling that something is up so he stops washing the dishes to turn and look at him. The look on Shawn's face confirms that something is on his mind so he grabs a towel to dry his hands as he asks...

Laurent: "What's up bro? You look like you need to talk for something". 

*brief pause*

Shawn: "Yeah I do". *pause* "I mentioned this before but I just wanted to know if you will reconsider going to counseling". 

Laurent: "I still don't know for that bro. I don't think I can". 

Shawn: "I'm not trying to pressure you Laurent but I just think it will really help you come to terms with the divorce and how you feel about Anthony so when it's time to date again you will be in a better place for that".  

Laurent merely drops his head because although a part of him does agree that counseling will help him with adjusting to both he just isn't sure he can talk about it right now. He isn't sure if he will ever be able to talk about it but he does understand why Shawn wants this for him. What he isn't expecting is what Shawn is about to reveal...

Shawn: "Listen I know a great therapist. Dani and I used her before and I think she can really help you. She agreed to see you as soon as tomorrow afternoon". 

Laurent's head immediately shoots up and panic is written all over his face...

Laurent: "What? You mean you made the appointment for me"?

Shawn: "No I didn't do that. I just asked her how soon she could see you if you agreed". 

Laurent: "Shit man! Why didn't you talk to me first?! You say you're not trying to pressure me but this feels like pressure"! 

*brief pause*

Shawn: "I didn't think about it like that. I'm sorry". *soft sigh* "I know you're doing better bro but I also know it will take more time to get where you want to be. I just see that as a way to help you get there".  

Laurent: *sigh* "It's ok. I'm sorry for yelling at you. I guess I'm scared. It feels like all of this just happened yesterday...but I understand why you think of this for me so thank you".

Shawn: "Anytime my brother and you don't have to see her tomorrow if you don't want to. See her whenever you're ready. Here's her phone number and office location". 

Laurent's eyes follow as Shawn drops the business card on the bar then slowly looks back up at him...

Shawn: "Your pace, ok"?

Laurent: *nods* "Oki". 

Shawn: "Alright well I need to get home. We'll hang out soon yes"?

Laurent: "Of course bro". 

Laurent walks him to the door and after a bro hug Laurent watches him walk to the car as he thinks about their conversation. Tomorrow is soon...but on the flip side it's already been a month and now Laurent is wondering how long he really needs to wait to talk to someone. Of course he can talk to his good friend as often as he needs to but there couldn't be any harm in speaking to a professional even if it's only a couple of times. With Shawn now driving into a distance Laurent steps back inside and shuts the door then walks back to the kitchen to finish cleaning up. Now that he's alone again he can really think and the more he does the more he realizes that he should. When the last dish is washed and put away he turns around and puts his eyes directly on the business card sitting atop the bar. At a cautious pace he walks over and slowly picks it up then spends several moments gazing at the name and number. He finally reaches for his phone and makes the call. At the first ring he takes a hard gulp and if there was ever a time to back out it's now...but he tells himself that he can do it and to just push through. Shawn made some great points and if he wants to have a successful relationship in the future he needs to make sure he's emotionally ready for one. The call goes to her voicemail so he proceeds to leave a message...

"Dr. Cote, my name is Laurent Bourgeois and my best friend, Shawn, told me that you're willing to see me as soon as tomorrow and I decided that I want to". 

Laurent takes another pause and nervously gulps then gives her his number to return his call and confirm a time. When he releases the call it hits him that he's really doing this and while very nervous he's already come to terms that it's for the best so as he waits for the returned call he heads over to the couch hoping that a good movie will settle his nerves...

~meanwhile~

Larry is standing at the stove working on a delicious dinner with a smile on his face. He's settled into his new routine very well and he couldn't be happier as evident by that smile plastered on his face. He's spent a few nights here prior to everything coming to light and it's one thing to get a feel for space when it's only been a couple of times but it's quite another one when it turns into every night so a large part of him was nervous about how easy, or difficult, the transition might be. Anthony has made him feel comfortable every step of the way and living together is completely natural to them. The closet and master bathroom have been transformed into "his and his" sections and Larry takes immaculate care of the home when Anthony is working. When Larry is working Anthony steps into that role while also doing things for Larry. He can't cook like Larry but he definitely makes sure a piping hot dinner is waiting for him that Larry smiles widely at every time. He and Laurent aren't in the best place as they only speak when necessary and they have to make sure their energy is productive whenever they're working. Larry hopes that in time things will get better between them. Perhaps they won't be as close as they use to be...but they're still connected and Larry wants nothing more for them to get past all the hurt because he still loves him and he's sure Laurent still loves him the same. Life with Anthony is more than he could have ever dreamed of and as he's waiting for him to come home from the gym he smiles wider as he knows Anthony will love the dinner he made. Anthony has made it clear that he's loved everything Larry has cooked even though Larry is still getting used to cooking healthier than he ever has because of Shawn being so fit and strict about his diet for the most part. Larry is now hearing the keys in the door and any moment now he expects to feel Anthony's strong arms wrap around his waist. Only seconds later he does and even though there's a slight perspiration on Anthony's hard body he still has the most wonderful scent that Larry quietly inhales. When Larry feels those warm lips pressed against his cheek for a kiss he closes his eyes at the sensation...

Anthony: "Hey babe", he whispers. 

Larry: "Hi", he whispers back. 

Anthony then moves his lips to Larry's neck who tilts his head to the side for easier access as he smiles and giggles...

Anthony: "It smells amazing in here". 

Larry: *smile* "Thank you. I'm making salmon with a special glaze, steamed broccoli and red skin mashed potatoes". 

Anthony still has a gentle hold on him so after hearing what's on the menu he squeezes slightly tighter as he whispers in his ear, "you're a dream". Larry smiles as he whispers, "but I'm not a dream". He then turns around and looks into his eyes to continue...

Larry: "I'm right here". 

Anthony: "Right where I want you to be", he whispers. 

Larry then leads forward to give those soft lips a kiss and it doesn't take long for their tongues to slither out and connect. They both moan upon the sensation then they slowly release to look at each other...

Anthony: "I'm going to take a shower now". 

Larry: "Oki. Dinner should be ready when you're done". 

Anthony can never resist taking Larry's chin between his thumb and pointer finger so he does exactly that then pulls him in for another kiss before whispering, "I can't wait". Larry hasn't stopped smiling and when Anthony winks at him he shyly drops his head then turns around to finish cooking. Anthony applies a playful smack to his bottom to which Larry jumps slightly as he giggles again then goes back to cooking. What he doesn't see behind him is Anthony who has yet to go and take that shower. He's resting his shoulder against the wall and watching Larry whilst smiling. For the first few days after Larry officially moved in it really did feel like a dream to him. Going to bed holding him every night then waking up the next morning delighting in the fact that by the end of the day he would be holding him again. Even though Larry told him that he isn't dreaming Larry truly does feel like a dream to him. A perfect dream where Larry embodies every ounce of sweet perfection in Anthony's eyes. He eventually turns around to head for the bedroom and take his shower so he can join this dreamy man for dinner...

~late evening~

The large bedroom is dark with the exception of the glow from the TV. The mood had been set since Larry's scrumptious dinner so by the time they hit the mattress and turned the TV on no attention was paid to it. They caught a glimpse of each other and their eyes were saying what their bodies felt. Anthony gently laid Larry against the mattress then hovered over him and kissed him sweetly. He took care to remove his clothing and once Larry's hard body was completely in the nude Anthony quickly and carefully put on the protection so they could partake in lovemaking...but Larry wanted to switch it up this time. He sweetly instructed Anthony to lie on his back and the moment his head hit the pillow Larry was straddling him then sliding down on his wood erupting an 'ahhh' from both. With Larry leaned over and panting in Anthony's ear he would raise his hips then slam firmly yet gently down Anthony's member which drove Anthony crazy. So much so that when Anthony released his first orgasm he took a firm squeeze of Larry's ass as his hips thrust upward while belting out an "ahh shit". Normally Larry is the one underneath shaking and moaning while Anthony placed kisses all over him until he came down from his climax...but this time Anthony was the one shaking and shrieking underneath Larry while Larry planted sweet kisses to his cheek then made his way to the neck. Anthony then flipped Larry over and made love to him so powerfully that Larry ultimately belted out his own sweet cry of ecstasy. Now they're lips are connected in a gentle kiss as a way to seal this moment just as they do each time. Then they pull away to simply admire each other...

Anthony: *smile* "Each time is as amazing as the last". 

Larry: *smile* "If not more". 

Anthony: *smile and wink* "I agree". *pause* "We're sweating babe. I think we need to take a shower together". 

Larry: *giggles* "Oki but just a shower". 

Anthony: *chuckles* "I can't promise that. You're already sexy as hell and your body dripping in water will only be another turn on". 

Larry giggles again and Anthony can't help but notice how adorable it is. He eventually assures him that it will only be a shower so they get up and head for the bathroom. It turns out to be more playful than anything and after giving each other a scrub down they're out, dried and changed then back in bed. Since they weren't watching TV to begin with it gets shut off and Anthony places a kiss to Larry's forehead before whispering for him to get some sleep as he does the same...

~next day~

Dr. Cote promptly returned Laurent's call and they agreed on a time for Laurent's session. Naturally the drive there was an unnerving one as he isn't sure what will come out of him today. He understands that no matter what emotions he experiences it's necessary to get them all out...but the anxiety level is still high and he's more so wondering if anger will be the dominant emotion. Perhaps it will be all the hurt that will manifest through the shedding of tears. Now at the office and with the preliminary things out of the way such as filling out paperwork as a first time client as well as Dr. Cote going through the typical therapist script about confidentiality and such, it's very quiet between them and has been for several moments. Laurent's back is pressed against the couch cushion...his right leg up and bent to where his ankle is resting against his thigh with his right hand resting on his knee. He hasn't made much eye contact with her due to his nerves which she understands as a professional having been in this field for some time. But, the silence has to be broken and talking must be begin in order to make the most of this...

Cote: "I understand your nervousness Mr. Bourgeois. First time therapy has that effect, but I also want you to say as much as you need to in the time we have together".  

*brief pause*

Laurent: "Yeah". *clears throat* "I'm sorry. I um, I just don't know where to start". 

Cote: *smile* "It's ok and that's completely normal. I can tell you that in my experience with clients, once they're able to get the first word out the rest seems to flow. You can start where ever you like". 

Silence falls again as Laurent nods in response. He then takes a silent breath in and finds the strength from within to speak...

Laurent: "I recently got divorced. I was married to the man I thought I was going to be with forever until we had a threesome with someone and...." *clears throat* "I'm sorry". 

Cote: "No apologies are necessary". *pause* "Can I get you a bottled water"?

Laurent: "Please". 

Dr. Cote is out of her chair and headed for the mini fridge to retrieve the water then back over in a flash to hand it to him. Laurent thanks her and doesn't hesitate to twist off the cap to take a long sip. He then feels composed enough to continue...

Laurent: "And um, I started seeing him without my husband, well ex-husband now, knowing what was going on". *pause* "I didn't know that he was seeing him too. We work together and it all came out when we went away on a business trip. Larry left because he was so mad and after that I talked to Anthony". 

Cote: "I'm sorry to interrupt you Mr. Bourgeois but can you tell me who is who"? 

Laurent: "Yeah. Sorry. Larry was my husband and Anthony was the guy we both cheated with. I was going to be with Anthony a lot and the more I saw him, the more we made love, the more I started to feel for him. I fell in love with him so it hurt me when I found out...but what hurt me more is he wanted to be with Larry so they're together now". 

Cote: "I see". *pause* "Do you mind telling me what prompted the threesome and who suggested it"? 

Laurent: "We both wanted to spice up us sex life and first we tried something else but we realized we did that already so I suggested it. This was something we never did so we agreed. We just didn't think it would cause a problem...but it did. A lot of problems. I still love Larry but it's Anthony I'm trying to get over. I thought we would be together but we're not". 

Cote: "Why do you think you were so in love with Anthony? What can you tell me about him"? 

For some reason Laurent is finding it a struggle to answer her question. What should have been words seemingly easy to roll off his tongue he can't seem to find in this moment...

Laurent: "Um, well...." *gulp* "He's sweet, he makes me laugh and we had a good time when we were together". 

Cote: "Anything else"?

Laurent: "The sex was amazing. I can't describe how I felt whenever he made love to me". 

Cote: "Were any of these qualities missing from your husband"?

Laurent: "No. Larry is all of those things too. It's just, Anthony is different. It felt like my laugh was different with him. Everything was different with him". 

Cote: "It was the excitement of the different".  

*silence*

Cote: "Am I correct in saying that there wasn't a big issue between you and your husband"?

Laurent: *nods* "You're correct". 

Cote: "So it sounds like a case of you were happy until someone came along and made you feel something different, including sex". 

Laurent freezes because he remembers Shawn essentially telling him the same thing...but at the time he was convinced that he was in love with Anthony. Now, he doesn't even know how to respond to her. But, she will say something that will completely shake him...

Cote: "Mr. Bourgeois, you stated that you're the one who suggested the threesome so is it possible that you convinced yourself that you're in love with Anthony to feel less guilty about bringing in a third person? Maybe it would somehow justify everything including the ultimate dissolution of your marriage"?

*brief pause*

Laurent: "I...I never think for that. I guess it's possible". 

Cote: "Could it also be possible that what you feel for Anthony isn't love but deep infatuation"?

Laurent: *nods* "Yeah". 

Cote: "What are Larry's qualities"?

Laurent: "He's funny, smart and kind to people. He loves kids and animals. He's sweet, always happy and I've always loved his laugh. He's generous and will give someone the clothes off his back if they need them. He has a lot of amazing qualities". 

Cote: *smile* "Sounds like it". *pause* "So when you think of love. Pure, deep love. Who do you think of"?

*brief pause*

Laurent: "Larry". 

Silence falls again as Dr. Cote merely glances at him. Laurent's eyes have slightly widened as he's realized what just happened...but then he remembers a very important and relevant fact...

Laurent: "But it doesn't matter. We're divorced now and Larry is happy with Anthony". 

Just as Dr. Cote is about to say something else Laurent stands up prompting her to look up at him in confusion...

Laurent: "I need to go". 

Cote: "But we still have time left".

Laurent: "No it's oki. Thank you for your help". 

Before she can get another word in Laurent is bolting for the door. Even the receptionist notices how fast he whisks by and she looks just as confused as Dr. Cote did when he stood to his feet. Once outside his shaky hand hit the button on his key less entry to unlock the door and he even struggles to open the door. Once inside he puts the key in the ignition...but he doesn't start the engine. He just lightly crashes his forehead on the steering wheel then bursts into tears...

---------------------- 

A/N: Alright my loves. What is everyone thinking? Laurent had quite the revelation today but Larry is deliriously in love with Anthony so it seems he has to get over Larry now. Not Anthony. Will he do that by dating and falling in love with someone else? Sound off in the comments! Love you guys. :)