Chapter Ten

Emeline's POV

Those poor people. I think of my family. They are probably infected as well. Even little Eva. Unless they made it to the town that I drew out on the paper I gave them before I left for Arin's.

I remember that my parents left us, in different ways, when I had just started elementary school. I can still recall Aunt Jess picking me up early from school, and holding my little hand. I was badly shaken when we reached the hospital, and I asked her who was that under the white sheet, why she was shaking and if she was a bad person because she had red eyes, like in those cartoons.

Then I saw my mommy and knocked into Aunt Jess hard. She started to tell me everything slowly, like 'Em, listen. Your mommy was driving to pick you up, but then someone went too fast, and then... bam. She's in heaven now, somewhere far, far away, and she won't come back anytime soon'. I only found out the real truth a few years later...

Apparently, Daddy and Mommy had not been getting along well, and they decided to divorce, since they all had different things to pursue in life. For Daddy, another woman. For Mommy, some business deal in another country.

Unfortunately, none of them considered me. To them, I was just like a little rag doll. If they wanted me, they would take me with them to wherever they wanted. If not, they would leave me at home with food and money only.

So, I was abandoned at home while Mommy and Daddy roamed the outside world. I got a few phone calls from them, sure, and thousands of envelopes that contained money for bills and stuff like that. But those never could compare to them being there, in the flesh, as one family.

Somehow, my Aunt Jess and her family found me, and took me in. I was showered with the love I always longed for, but it somehow still did not feel right. I decided to stay by Aunt Jess' side when she called my parents, but she tried to keep me occupied with Eva, my favourite cousin, who was, back then, a little toddler.

Until now, I can still conjure the blurry image of eleven-year-old me sacrificing my precious sleep time to eavesdrop on Aunt Jess talking to my parents.

Mommy had Depression.

Daddy had lost his woman.

They had forgotten completely about me, and Aunt Jess did not bother to talk about me.

I felt lost and a deep, deep hopelessness. Could the Daddy and Mommy that I grew up with really leave me? What type of parents were they?

From then on, I didn't bother to listen anymore. I became very obedient, doing whatever Aunt Jess asked me to. She was not obliged to keep me, and I didn't want to burden her with my presence. That, and also because I did not want to be left on the streets, begging on my knees for money, sobbing...
The thought sent my heart splitting into two. I needed, wanted, love. Family love.

My older cousin, Jon, said that eventually I would get hurt, but I have managed to hold on till now.

A few months later, Mommy jumped off a building.

Daddy left the country in search of another woman.

And I remained where I was, with Aunt Jess, Uncle Jameson, Jon and Eva, determined not to let anyone else get hurt the way I did.

I locked myself in my room, throwing things around to vent my anger. I vowed to myself to never let Aunt Jess worry, so I did that once they were fast asleep.

I got perfect grades every year, not to impress them, but to make sure I didn't let myself down.

Pain was my motivator. It was the thing that spurred me on.

Then a few years later, when I had just gone on to middle school, Daddy came and begged for me. Aunt Jess refused, and I did not bother to see him. It was obvious that he had failed in every aspect in his life, and I was grateful to Aunt Jess for not giving me away.

As I returned to my room, Daddy called me and asked for forgiveness. I ignored his angelic voice that told me that Aunt Jess was in no position to take care of me.

"Emeline?" I turn my head, and see Rose staring at me, and I nod, to confirm that I'm alright.

"We're in the kitchen, Emeline. If you want to help, then come on."

I nod again numbly, then push myself to a stand, looking over my shoulder at the window with the black pellets pounding on it again.

Just like me, it's harmed over and over, but it will not break.

Instead, it'll try it's best to defend the things inside it, but cracks will form on it, until one day it will break, and shatter, and then a giant gap will replace it. Someone will then buy another one to replace it, and it'll be like the window never existed.

But the window will always remember the pain, the damage, the hurt it endured.

I'm waiting for that day, that day when I finally break.