Chapter 32
She had pushed him away after he had kissed her.

Jane's actions surprised the raven-haired Volturi king. He had thought that she would be elated to find out he reciprocated the feelings she harbored for him for countless centuries already. The head of guard's hands flew to her lips and she stared at him. However, the Volturi king was not ready of what she was about to tell him.

"You do not have the right to walk into my life and tear me apart once more." Jane said, straightforwardly.

Aro's eyes widened as he did not expect that kind of reaction from the blonde vampire. He had been sure that she would be happy that he would be able to give the same affection she gave him. It took him a few minutes before he figured out that she was not happy with this whole ordeal. Was it a misunderstanding,perhaps?

"My dear, let me explain-"he attempted to explain his side yet his head of guard beat him to it.

"There's no point explaining Master. I get that you do not want any distractions for me. You see Felix as a distraction therefore you got rid of him for my sake, at least what you believed him to be." The blonde vampire said in a calm tone, yet he was sure that her emotions would burst any moment. The Volturi king inhales sharply and tries to reason out with her once more.

"Jane, if you would let me explain firs-"

"I get it, Master!" She cuts him off. "You feel sorry for me that's why you are fooling me in a false sense of security and pretending you love me. What happened to the bury your feelings in the deepest depths of the earth? Quit lying to me, please. Save me your excuses because no matter what angle i will look, you are doing this to redeem yourself."

She can feel him staring right through her. Was the Volturi king staring at her like she was more than a temporary and subpar replacement for his wife?Jane was not daft to not see how Aro would give an intimidating look at the burly vampire who harbored feelings for her. And here she goes again, giving the raven-haired vampire second, third, and hundreds of chances.

And she never seemed to learn.

"I love you..." he merely tells her. "Okay? I do love you, Jane.

The Volturi king knew that there was no use on crying over something that cannot be undone. All this time, he knew that his relationship with his head of guard was hanging on a single piece of thread. She had known all this time and Jane did not want to see it break at all.

"Sometimes i feel there's more, and staying away from you isn't enough anymore. And i was too scared of admitting the truth because it was something that i got used to and became comfortable with."

He was disheartened to see that Jane did not try to hear him out. The Volturi king was not aware of the warning signs she had been giving him all along. All this time, Aro did not want to read her mind as he knew he cannot change what was inevitable. Jane had given him too many signs that it was over, yet he chose to ignore it.

"You cannot keep doing this to me!" She cries out. The head of guard's voice was raised a few tones higher as her emotions are slowly spiraling out of control. Jane's gaze then burned right through him. "You cannot keep doing things and pity yourself like it was the way you can redeem yourself."

"I am doing this for you, Jane."he merely tells her.

Everything was about her and for her at the first place.

"You don't get it, do you?"she scoffs. "I chose him. So stop this ridiculous game of trying to win me back and ruin my relationship with him. You've done enough damage already."

"You told me you love me, Jane. Should you be elated that i was able to reciprocate your feelings?"

Aro was beyond confused. Jane did not react the way he expected her to do. He was not prepared for the tension that their conversation had opened. He had expected that she would be happy about it yet it seems that she was not. Jane looked at him with a dejected expression before speaking once more.

"But it's just that i do not possess the same feelings anymore..." Jane reveals with a tone devoid of any emotion."You had no idea how much i loved you."

His face fell at her revelation that unfolded right in front of him. The value of time then caught up to him. As immortal as the were, time was the least of their worries. Their immortality gave them a prospect of eternity and they tended to disregard time after all. He should have held her hand, reciprocated her feelings when given the chance.

Her feelings heading steadily towards the unknown for it to gradually fade and be lost in time.

"You broke me."she merely said. "You put me through hell, but do you know what hurts the most? I tried.

Jane was with him through the darkest of days. She would obey his every whim and command without a thought. The Volturi king could not deny that he had been selfish to keep her all to himself. He cannot admit it out loud that he had crossed the line when he had taken his part on breaking the bonds between Jane and Felix.

"But i do love you, Jane."the Volturi king just tells her.

"And you'll have to learn to live with it. Exile your thoughts that you love me and bury it in the deepest depths of the earth like you told me to."

Aro may have been a powerful vampire though the Volturi. He had vampires at his disposal. He was the king alongside his brother. With his gaze that lingered on the door where Jane left, it hit him that his greediness had taken every inch of the woman he desperately tried to deny that he loved.

His greediness had taken everything away.

Jane did not know if Renata's appointment as the second in command was Aro's way of telling her that he did not tolerate her insolence. The head of guard did not know if it was his wife's machinations or just a mere coincidence after all. With the shield being appointed as the second in command, the blonde vampire was certainly in a foul mood.

"That spoiled brat became the second-in-command?" Heidi whispers under her breath as the core members of the Elite guard gathered in the common room they shared. Heidi had a habit of lingering around as it seems like she was Demetri's woman as of the moment.

"You do not need to state the obvious, Heidi." Jane said.

The alluring woman immediately quieted down as Jane bit back a snark comment. The blonde vampire could only sigh in distress as heaven and hell seemed to gang up on her by a series of unfortunate events. Jane kept her mouth shut as she ddi not wish to make matters much worse.

"Head of Guard, how lovely to speak to you at last!" Renata told the blonde vampire in a tone of poisoned sweetness. "I had almost lost hope in ever meeting you."

Jane placed her book down and stared at the shield. The once tranquil common room was replaced by Renata's lively presence. The other occupants in the room groaned inwardly.

"Well you have now, Renata," the head of guard said, frowning, unsure where this was going.

"But then, I suppose it is both our faults," Renata said consideringly, adding in simpering tones, "while you have been out and about, I have been quite preoccupied... with proving my worth to our Master."

The other members, watching on the side, was aghast of how Renata attempted to undermine the blonde vampire's authority. Jane looked at the vampire who possessed a physical shield, fury in her gaze as she caught onto what she was saying.

Oh how Renata loved to make her nemesis uncomfortable.

The head of guard, however, chose to play Renata's game. She had taken out a small item from the drawers of her desk and presented it upon the newly elected second in command. At the sidelines, Alec and Demetri watched the blonde vampire's actions and they instantly knew Jane was up to something.

"Take it as a welcome gift of being my second in command."

The shield took the gift, and looked at the blonde vampire with an excited expression. Jane did not know if the woman in front of her was merely putting up an act or was she really that innocent. The extravagant sword glimmered in the sunlight that was in their rooms.

"May your service as the second in command shall be like the sword: extravagant and beautiful." The head of guard chuckles.

The men in the room understood what the blonde vampire meant. The sword may be very expensive but it was only something decorative. It was useless since vampires had solid rock hard skin that is quite impossible to penetrate by a mere sword. The sword cannot help in a battle or even a duel.

Jane was indirectly telling the shield that she'll serve a vain and empty life without any responsibilities.

"I how you cope with the pressure. I mean, the masters do place you on a high pedestal. Tell me head of guard, how do you do it?" Renata asks the blonde vampire as she made herself comfortable as she sat right in front of the blonde vampire.

"I do not rely on my powers." The blonde vampire merely tells her."Well, i cannot deny the master's favoritism however i am more than just a favorite. My actions can certainly speak for itself without all those favors."

The other occupants in the room could only watch everything unfold. They knew that Jane was slowly intimidating the

"There's no point for you trying to act like you are one of them, Renata." Jane tells her, straightforward as ever.

"That's not for you to decide."

"I'm merely saying what i'm seeing, Renata. You may be the second in command yet we both know that they would think of you as nothing but a decoration. After all you tried to scheme for, plotting to kill me? Sabotaging other guards? I know them all, Renata." The head of guard said in a calm tone.

Renata swept the hair out of her face and her gaze fixates on the blonde vampire. The guards in the room could see that the shield was trying hard to turn the tide of power towards her yet failed miserably. Heidi was right after all, Renata was a desperate copy of the blonde vampire.

"What are you talking about? The second in command is here to assist if ever you were deemed indispensable. Not that i want to yet if given the chance, why not?"

Renata was indirectly threatening her however Jane caught a hold of it.

The blonde vampire chuckles darkly. She straightens up and leaned next to the newly elected second in command. Sulpicia may come rallying up against her yet Jane knew it in herself that she was untouchable.

"We both know that being the second in command was nothing but an empty title." Jane whispers in the shield's ear. Her nonchalant met the enraged eyes of her subordinate. She could only chuckle inwardly to see Renata's failed attempt to outsmart her. "Enjoy it while you can."

Renata may have started the argument, yet the head of guard will not allow for a mere second place outsmart her.

The head of guard stared blankly on the moonless sky above her from the view of the highest places in the castle. It was already at the ungodly hours of night, and Jane certainly did not know what to do. She was only given a brief moment of time wit the burly vampire. Their relationship was short lived yet she knew it in herself that she should have been relieved. Their time spent together in happiness could be compared to a kiss in the wind, ever so quick to dissapear.

Perhaps, if Jane knew, she should have cherished those precious moments. The times where no one was coming in between them and manipulating their bonds. Yet what was done was done already, it was not like Jane could convince their master to restore her bonds with Felix.

She did not know if that would benefit her at all.

The blonde vampire took a walk in the courtyard of the said place. It's nice to meditate because it's quiet and no one would dare to spy on her at this hour. There were a handful of things that seemed to be bothering the head of guard. Taking a not much needed deep breath to calm the storm that seems to be raging in her mind, the Volturi guard stopped in her tracks.

She spun around and saw the man that had his bond with her broken. Jane had not been lying when she told him that she was clueless of her relationship with the burly vampire. It was what she was led to believe the moment Charmion had broken their bonds.

"Jane..."

It was as if they were fated to meet in that courtyard. It would have been romantic, but fate had other plans after all.

"Hello..." she said in a low tone. "I did not expect to see you here."

"What are you doing here? You should be in your chambers" The burly vampire, his concern felt familliar to the head of guard. It was disheartening that she could not remember anything at she really deserve that dedication and faithfulness gave her?

"How about you? Why are you not in your chambers?" Jane returns his question back to the burly vampire.

"My mind is too much of a mess right now." He tells her as his eyes drift towards the pond. "We used to come here at night, when everyone else was preoccupied. Do you remember that?"

The burly vampire spent so much time with her that Felix was able to memorize the mannerisms of the head of guard. There was more to her silence that it presumed. He pressed on the issue.

"I don't recall it." She lies smoothly.

The burly vampire could only sigh before answering back to the head of guard. He was oblivious to the fact that Jane was lying straight to his face. The blonde vampire assumed that it was the better thing to do after all. How can this arrangement be right when the two of them were so close yet the blonde vampire seems to be so far from his reach?

Should he give up? Or should they still try?In time, he knew he'll have to set her free. Yet until then, he will not stop loving the blonde vampire right next to him.

"Something is bothering you. Care to share about it?" He presses on.

The blonde vampire looked visibly uncomfortable with his presence. She was adamant about the topic. It took him a few more minutes to get her to open up.

"It's nothing. I'm fine really..." she confessed blantantly. Knowing that the person behind all of these unspoken thoughts was just right in front of her. The person whom she was slowly forgetting as time passes by.

"You don't need to hide it, Jane. I can see it in your eyes that something is wrong."

Being the good friend he was, Felix was simply looking out for her welfare. Yet the head of guard never thought of him as a friend anymore. She had deduced that he was somehow involved with her yet she ddi not wish to press on it further.

"You cannot keep chasing after me like a lost puppy." she breathed, knowing that it was the reality of their situation. "Stop this foolishness before it consumes you."

Jane did not know him and the role he played in her life now, yet she was certain that she had been in love with him once. She knows that. The memory of him was gone from her mind yet she knew during those moments that she was once been undeniably in love with him.

"You are not in the disposition to tell me on if i should keep fighting for you or not." Felix tells her. "Its up to me if i decide i want to hold on to what was left of us."

Felix had been hers, yet she could not remember how she got him. Snippets of memories slips of them falling in love and it hurt after all. It hurt him, as she was not able to remember how things were. Was time really not in their favor?

"You will never understand."she muttered under her breath yet it was audible enough for Felix to hear it.

Even though Jane was standing right in front of him, it pained him knowing that she lost him somewhere and what they had in that mind of was then Felix realized that losing her did not hurt as much as losing her memories with him. But it did not matter to the blonde vampire on how hard she stared. She could not remember the time she spent with the burly vampire.

That was the bitter reality after all.

"Hello? Have we met?"she asks.

Solidifying the claim that she was slowly losing the memories she spent with him. Jane was not lying to him anymore. Her memories began fading yet his remained. Although her memories were starting to fade and his were to forever remain, he could not help but feel that it was his punishment after all. For him to remember everything while Jane could not recall anything would hurt more than dying once more.

"Hello, my name is Felix."

And just then, they were back at the beginning. Same as the first line he told her, repeating the same story with the same tragic ending all over again. Being forced to relive every single moment, yet he always knew the only difference was before: they were strangers to one another.

Now they were strangers again, yet he possesses hidden memories from her.

AN:

I apologize for the delay! There were some hiccups here and there because of my schedule overlapping. Speaking of schedules, i would do my updates in a bulk and upload them during the end of the month (30 or 31) in order to make it feasible for my schedule.