Chapter 14
"Castiel!"
As soon as Castiel steps through the door, Hannah runs at him, tackling him into a hug. Castiel awkwardly hugs her back. The only people he ever hugs are Sam and Dean, and they're a lot taller than this child, so hugging her is definitely strange. It seems to make her happy, though, so he doesn't really mind it.
"Castiel?" Hannah says, craning her neck to look at him.
"Yes?"
"Where's your halo?"
Castiel chuckles. "I don't have a halo."
"Why not?" Hannah asks, confused. "Did you lose it? 'Cause I lose a lot of things."
"No, angels just don't have halos," Castiel says. "Most human perceptions of us are only vaguely based on fact, if at all."
"What does purse-shuns?" Hannah asks.
Castiel just stares at her uncomprehendingly for a moment. After a pause, it occurs to him that children probably don't have a very good vocabulary, and she probably doesn't know big words. "You mean perceptions?"
Hannah nods eagerly.
"It's... um..." How does he explain that? At least with the Winchesters, if they — or, most often, Dean — didn't know a word, he could just give a synonym. There aren't many child-friendly synonyms for "perception." "Well, basically, it means that what you think you know about angels is very different than what angels are really like."
"Well, what are angels really like?" Hannah asks.
Castiel shrugs. "Like me, I guess."
"Awesome," Hannah whispers. "Can we watch TV?"
"I guess," Castiel says.
Hannah stares at him expectantly.
"Am I supposed to do something?" Castiel asks.
"TV!"
Castiel pauses, trying to figure out what she wants him to do. It only occurs to him after a few moments that she probably wants him to turn on the TV for her. It's one thing he has in common with little kids — an inability to use technology. Fortunately, he's spent enough time watching Netflix to at least know how to use a TV.
Castiel grabs the remote from the table and turns the TV on for her. It opens to the play menu of the movie Frozen, which Castiel has only seen once — courtesy of Dean, of course — but is rather fond of.
"Let's watch Frozen again!" Hannah squeals.
Castiel plays the movie, and Hannah immediately sits down on the floor to watch. He can't help but smile to himself. Little kids are adorable. He's not sure why the Winchesters never really seemed to like them. Occasionally, they would bond with a child on a case, but they'd always forget about them within minutes of leaving. Castiel doesn't see himself forgetting Hannah any time soon. Maybe that's why Sam and Dean didn't let him go on many mundane hunts with them.
Not much happens for the first few minutes of the movie, but once "Do You Want to Build a Snowman" comes on, Hannah is up and on her feet, screaming the words — or what words she knows, which results in a lot of incoherent mumbling and very awkward-looking dancing. As soon as the song ends, Hannah turns around and looks at him hopefully.
"Can you play it again?"
"I guess," Castiel says, then rewinds the video for her.
Hannah sings along again, then it ends, and she makes Castiel play it again. And again. And again.
"Sing with me!" Hannah says.
"I don't know the words," Castiel says.
"But I wanna hear you sing!" Hannah insists.
"But I don't know it," Castiel repeats.
"Can't you turn the words on the bottom?"
Castiel sighs. "I suppose." He really doesn't want to sing, but if it'll distract her, he'll make the sacrifice. He turns the captions on, then attempts to (very poorly) sing along with her.
And then she makes him do it again.
And again.
And again.
By this point, he's starting to get the hang of it. Having heard the song at least a dozen times by now, he's picked up bits and pieces here and there. He's never been one for memorizing music — he doesn't even know the words to the Led Zeppelin songs Dean gave him all those years ago, even if he does still listen to them on occasion — so he's fairly impressed with himself as he finally nails the chorus. Well, he nails the words. The pitches aren't quite there yet.
"If this is what heaven looks like, I think I'd like to check out hell."
Castiel looks over his shoulder to see that Emma is awake, sitting on the couch and watching them, amused.
Castiel breathes a sigh of relief at the sight. "You're okay."
"A little disoriented, but otherwise, I'm pretty okay," Emma says. "Where's James? Did he get tired of your sing-along and leave?"
Castiel chuckles. "No, he's burning the —" He cuts himself off at the last second. James specifically told him not to say anything about Hannah's family in front of her. He isn't entirely sure, but he'd assume the family's bodies are on the do-not-discuss list.
Emma nods, understanding his implied ending. "Who made it out?"
Castiel looks down at Hannah, who's hiding from Emma behind his legs. "She did."
Emma gapes at him. "That's it?"
Castiel nods solemnly. "Unfortunately."
"What happened to the other kids?" she asks. "They were fine when I saw them."
Castiel glances down at Hannah, then says, "Maybe we should have this conversation at a different time."
Emma sighs. "I guess." She pauses, then asks, "So her parents, they...?"
Castiel just shakes his head.
"What are we going to do with her, then?" Emma asks. "We can't leave a kid her age to fend for herself."
"I don't know," Castiel admits. "I guess we try to find her relatives?"
"How do we do that?" Emma asks.
"I don't know." Sam would probably work some computer magic, or Dean would find contact information somewhere in the house, but Castiel's never been as technologically skilled or as observant as them.
Emma slides off the couch and crouches down so she's closer to Hannah's height. "Hi."
Hannah watches her warily.
"My name is Emma," she says. "I'm Castiel's friend."
Hannah looks up at Castiel, almost as if asking for help.
"What's your name?" Emma asks.
Hannah looks back to Emma, then averts her gaze to look at the floor. With a defeated sigh, Emma sits down on the ground and looks up at Castiel helplessly.
But, after a long pause, a tiny voice says, "Hannah."
Emma beams at the response. "Hi, Hannah. It's really nice to meet you."
This one doesn't get a response, but it doesn't discourage her.
"I was thinking," Emma continues, "wouldn't it be fun if you had a sleepover with your cousins? Or your aunt and uncle? Or even your grandparents?"
Hannah just shakes her head.
"Why not?" Emma asks, her smile disappearing.
"They're not nice," Hannah says.
"Oh." Emma pauses, not sure what else to say. "Well, if you had to stay with someone, who would you want to stay with?"
"Mommy and Daddy."
Emma frowns. "I'm sorry, but that's not an option."
Tears begin forming in her eyes. She looks up at Castiel, lip quivering. "Are my Mommy and Daddy okay?"
Castiel looks to Emma for help answering that, but even she doesn't seem sure of how to respond. He knows he's supposed to steer clear of these kinds of topics, but she specifically asked about it, and he can't lie. She'll have to figure it out in a few minutes, anyway. It's best to preserve what trust she may have in him.
"No," he says finally, "they're not."
That's all it takes to send Hannah over the edge. She bursts into tears, sobbing so loudly that he's sure the whole neighborhood can hear her. Castiel bites his lip, desperately trying to think of something to cheer her up with, or at least to calm her down. When he realizes there are no words to make this better, he sits down on the floor and holds his arms out. It doesn't take any more prompting than this for her to go over and wrap her arms around him, and Castiel hugs her back.
"I'm sorry," Castiel whispers. "I am so, so sorry." And he can't express how true it is. If only he'd focused more when he brought Hannah and her parents out. Maybe he couldn't have saved her siblings, but if he'd paid attention, he could have realized Emma was possessed before Hannah had to lose her parents, too.
James picks this moment to come back, and, naturally, the first thing he sees is Hannah crying. Though he gives Castiel an exasperated look, his attention quickly shifts to Emma as soon as he realizes she's awake. She gives him a small smile, and James rushes to her side, crouching down next to her.
"Are you okay?" he asks.
Emma shrugs. "Well, I'm alive, so I can't complain."
"How much do you remember?" James asks.
"Literally nothing," she replies. "I was standing outside with the kids, and then I wasn't. The demon probably snuck up behind me and knocked me out of something."
Castiel and James share a look, silently along each other if they should tell her what really happened. With Hannah still sobbing into Castiel's trench coat, it's probably best to wait. They don't need to risk having a second mental breakdown right now.
"What?" Emma asks nervously.
"Nothing," James says. "We'll, um..." He glances at Hannah, then finishes, "we'll tell you later."
She frowns, but doesn't push it.
"Castiel?" Hannah mumbles into his chest, her sobs quieting down.
"Yes?"
"Can I stay with you?"
Castiel looks up at James and Emma helplessly. They can't take a child hunting. That's the very basis of most of Sam and Dean's emotional problems. But how can he say no to her? She just lost her whole family. He doesn't want to tell her she has to lose him, too.
It's James who finally steps in with, "You can go stay with your family instead. Your cousins or aunt and uncle."
She shakes her head quickly. "No, they're mean."
"What do you mean?" James asks. "They can't all be mean."
"Uncle Sal is really, really mean," she says. "Mommy and Daddy like him, but they don't know that he's really, really mean."
"Do you have any other family?" Emma asks.
Hannah shakes her head.
"Well, why's Uncle Sal mean?" James asks. "What does he do?"
"He drinks a lot of grownup drinks," she says. "And when he drinks too many grownup drinks and there are no other grownups around, he gets mad at me and hits me really, really hard and it hurts. And then he tells me not to tell anyone, or he's gonna do it again and again."
The three adults in the room look at each other, making sure they all have the same thought, as if anyone in their right mind would disagree. They're not sending her there. It's not even worth the risk to leave her with the police and see who her parents left her too. If they don't know Uncle Sal is abusive, there's a very good chance they could have left her with him, and it's not a risk any of them are willing to take.
"Hannah, honey, does Uncle Sal have any other kids?" Emma asks.
Hannah shakes her head, and Emma breathes a sigh of relief.
"Would you mind if I talk to Castiel and Emma alone for a minute?" James asks.
Hannah immediately hugs Castiel in protest.
"Please?" Emma adds.
Hannah shakes her head.
"You go talk," Castiel says. "If you're nearby, I'll still hear you."
"Yeah, but Hannah —" James begins.
"No, I'll hear you because I'm an angel," Castiel says. "If you're on the other side of the house, I'll hear you."
"That's so cool," Emma whispers, eyes wide.
"And kinda creepy," James adds. "But whatever. That works."
So they leave, and Castiel is left alone to try to cheer Hannah up.
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