Song: Believe It // PARTYNEXTDOOR & Rihanna 

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Amber spent an unnatural amount of her day cooped up in our dad's study. Sometimes, she'd eat in there by herself, or fall asleep in his armchair (which meant that I had to carry her back to bed). Ever since the incident with the principal, she's grown more distant, but she had stopped crying at night and got her shit together.

And while she isolated herself from me, I grew more lonely which resulted in me drowning myself in work. We had a big house, courtesy of my dad and his distaste for small spaces, and the constant silence drove me up the wall with madness.

After graduating from university, I realized that most of the friendships I built in those four years were completely superficial, so it didn't affect me when we lost contact with each other.

But the fact that I didn't have any friends was slowly starting to hole its way into my brain, and sometimes, as I sat in our spacious, empty house by myself, that was all I could think of.

I had no one.

But it wasn't the right time to make friends, I wouldn't be able to pay them any attention, and so there was a chance we would also lose contact.

I could barely maintain my relationship with Amber.

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"Amber, get down here! You still didn't eat breakfast and we're leaving in five!" I yelled upstairs as I draped my tie around my neck.

I didn't hear her signature thump and started growing frustrated, "Amber! Come on, you have to go to school today! You're still making up for those assignments you missed!"

I was met with silence instead and so I started growing worried. I made my way upstairs towards her bedroom's general direction.

I knocked on her door and opened it to be met with darkness, "Amber?" I whispered my gaze landing on what looked like a ball in the center of her bed.

I turned on the lights and saw Amber curled in the center of her bed, clutching her stomach in what looked like pain.

At the sight, I scrambled towards her, "Amber? Amber, what's wrong?" I asked worryingly, my hands hovering above her figure, scared to touch her and make it worse.

She let out a groan and clenched her eyes shut, "My stomach hurts." She mumbled. "My back too."

"Okay. Okay, okay. That's fine–" I started.

Her eyes shot open and she cut me off, "No, it's not! It really hurts, Dyl." She whined, her tone laced with pain and anger.

"It's okay–" I reassured her. But when she glared at me, I clamped my mouth shut instead. "I'll call up the school and tell them you're that you're going to be absent, then I'll call Lillian and tell her to cancel everything I had scheduled for today. We'll go to the doctor's, alright?"

"No!" She sounded. "No doctors, no hospitals."

I didn't understand why she was acting like she was going to give birth anytime now, but I didn't comment on her overreaction, opting to be more reasonable.

I stared at her curled figure, "But Amber, I don't know what to do. What if there's something wrong with you? They can figure it out and help you get better." I tried to sway her decision.

She slapped my hands, annoyed and looked me dead in the eyes, "No doctors." She gritted out. "I'll just deal with it, can you get me some painkillers?"

I wanted to protest, because what if something was really wrong with her? What if...

What if this was a tumor pressing into her spinal cord? What if she had cancer just like dad did. Her cold response to the idea of going to the clinic made sense now, the last time she was at a hospital, our dad died, and maybe that experience has scarred her and tainted her view of doctors.

It's going to be fine, I reassured myself.

"Okay, I'll get you some painkillers," I told her. "And I'll get you your breakfast."

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After I forced her to eat her piece of toast and eggs alongside the pain medication, Amber told me that she was feeling better hours later when I went back up to check on her.

I had never felt so relieved to hear her say that before in my life. She told me that she was going to take a shower and sleep afterward. Silence fell over the house once again, and I sat in the midst of it, reviewing the notes Lillian took during a meeting yesterday.

I must have looked like such a nerd. I was still dressed in my button-up shirt and dress pants with glasses perched on my nose as I tried to make sense of the information she had taken down. The sun was setting outside, and I couldn't wait for this day to be over so that I could go up to my bed and sleep.

The sound of footsteps descending the stairs broke me out of my concentration and I looked up to meet Amber's gaze. Her hair was dripping wet, and she was dressed in black joggers and a black hoodie, but she avoided my gaze and stood awkwardly on the stairs.

I looked back at my laptop and continued typing up a report, "Everything alright?" I asked.

"Uh, yeah," She coughed out. "Um, Dylan–"

"Yeah?" I replied.

"I need you to take me to the store," She said.

I looked up at her and raised my brow, "Why? You need to rest or your stomach might start hurting again."

She let out an awkward cough again and I was thoroughly confused at the interaction. 

Why was she being so awkward?

"Yeah, about that." She started uncomfortably. "Turns out those were just cramps, I, uh... I just got my period."

I choked on my spit and eyed my younger sister, "Are you sure? You don't look like you did." I stated suspiciously.

"Yes, I'm sure! Blood doesn't normally out from down there!" She exploded, making my jump and fall off the couch. I really didn't need to know that, but if there was one thing I learned from this day was to not argue with her. 

"What does that even mean? 'You don't look like you did'," She continued in a low voice, clearly mocking me.

"Alright!" I said, getting up from the floor and rubbing my arm. "Jesus, calm down. We'll go to the store."

She huffed, threw open the front door and stomped all the way down to my car. I looked up to our family portrait to see a happy Amber staring back at me. Letting out a heavy sigh, I pinched the bridge of my nose and collected my car keys, heading towards my car.

Starting up the engine, I muttered, "Let's get this over with."

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The store was relatively empty, only filled with people doing some last-minute grocery shopping, probably to prepare their dinner. After getting lost in the maze of a store, we finally found the hygienic products. There was another woman standing in the aisle, and when she saw both of us staring at the products, she gave us a small smile.

I could feel the blood rush up to my face from the embarrassment and averted my gaze, staring at the wide array of pads and tampons before us.

Swallowing down my discomfort, I looked over at Amber and asked, "So, do you know what you're going to get?"

She met my gaze and shook her head, "I only know that I don't want to get the tampons."

I nodded in response and picked a pack of pads to inspect them, "Well, this one says that it's large?" I furrowed my eyebrows, confused about why they came in different sizes.

Amber massaged her temples and yanked the box out of my hand and put it back from where I got it, "I don't know what any of this means." She said in a quiet voice.

I felt for her, I really did. Amber didn't grow up with a maternal figure, instead, she lived with members of the opposite species. I didn't know what to do either, given I've barely had any experience in this department.

"That's okay, Amber," I said, taking out my phone from my pocket and waving it. "Luckily, we've got Google to help us, yeah?"

The corner of her lips tugged, and she pulled out her phone as well and searched up an article or something about sanitary products.

Our research session was interrupted by a woman's voice to our right, "Um, hello!"

Amber and I lifted our eyes from our phones to look at the woman who was rocking herself back and forth on the heels of her feet. I recognized her as the girl who shot me a smile minutes earlier.

"I'm Rose," She started in a soft voice, giving us a small wave. "And I couldn't help but overhear that you don't know what to get."

I looked over at my sister to find that she shrank back behind me, her face becoming redder by the second.

I lifted my brow, since an embarrassed Amber was a rare sight, and turned around to greet Rose, "Hi, I'm Dylan, and this is my sister, Amber." I gripped Amber's shoulder and pulled her forwards so she was in front of me. "We're both very inexperienced when it comes to, uh, per–"

I stopped speaking when my younger sister jabbed her elbow into my ribcage, making me let out a surprised "oof".

Rose smiled at our antics and stepped forward to look at Amber, "There's nothing to be ashamed of; all women go through this. I'd be happy to help you find what you're looking for."

Amber looked up at her, and for the first time in weeks, I saw a genuine smile grace her lips. And I'm talking about a full-on wide, teeth-baring, smile. 

"Yes, please," Amber said, and they both turned around to face the shelves.

I stared at Rose in astonishment. In a matter of a few seconds, she's managed to comfort Amber and make her smile, something I've been trying to do for weeks now. I watched as she asked my younger sister some questions and helping her pick out a pack of suitable products.

As I stood there awkwardly, still rubbing the area where Amber had elbowed me, I couldn't help but openly stare at her. Her brown hair cascaded down to her shoulder blades in a bundle of frizzy curls that were pulled back by a royal blue bandana. She was dressed in a pair of leggings, a red sweater, and a pair of sneakers. Smile lines framed her mouth, while her eyelashes fluttered every time she grinned over at Amber

And she looked beautiful as fuck.

When the two girls looked back at me, I quickly averted my gaze, coughing awkwardly when I saw Amber smirk. My sister held two boxes in her hands while Rose smiled softly at me.

"Uh," I stuttered. "Thanks for all your help, Rose, we really appreciate it."

"Yeah!" Amber piped in, still eyeing me mischievously. She turned to face Rose and asked her, "Hey, do you want to have dinner with us? Dylan was going to take me to a McDonalds."

I was? I didn't remember agreeing to that.

Nonetheless, I offered for her to join us, "Yeah! Think of it as a way of repaying you for all your help today."  

Rose held her smile, "I'm sorry, I have to go back home, I left my dog by herself for way longer than I should've. But thank you for the offer!"

"Oh," Amber mumbled dejectedly. I frowned at my sister, not liking that her happiness was slowly fading away.

Rose noticed my sister's change in mood, "But, I'd be happy to give you my number, Amber, so that you can ask me questions whenever you're feeling confused."

Instantly, my sister perked up and nodded enthusiastically, "Yes, please!" She said, handing her the phone.

I'm not going to lie, I felt a bit of jealousy slowly creeping in. I didn't understand what about Rose made my sister happy. I've been trying for a month now, and every time I offered to do something together, she'd refuse, opting to spend time by herself.

After they've exchanged numbers, Amber gave her a hug and skipped off towards the junk food aisle, leaving me alone with Rose.

I started at my sister's retreating figure and turned back to Rose, "Well, thank you for everything you've done." I said, giving her a small smile. "I don't know how I could repay you."

"Don't worry about it, Dylan," She beamed. "I was happy to help, you don't need to 'repay me'."

I nodded in reply and rubbed my arms, feeling awkward standing in front of this happy woman.

"Uhm," I started, pointing my thumb behind me towards where Amber ran off. "I've got to go find my sister, but, hopefully, we'll see each other again?"

She grasped both of her hands together in front of her, and started rocking back and forth again, "I'd like that." She replied.

"Well, um, bye," I waved and turned around and left her standing behind me.

I almost had a heart attack when I saw Amber standing behind the shelves, clearly eavesdropping into our conversation. She now had a bottle of Advil, and a mountain of chips and gummies piled up on top of the two boxes she got with the help of Rose.

"'Well, um, bye'?" She repeated in a condescending tone. "You're honestly such an awkward mess, Dyl."

Taking everything she had in her arms into mine, I shoved her with my shoulders, "Shut up." I mumbled, sulking off to the cashier so that I could pay for her stuff.

"Is Dylan smitten?" She dragged out, wiggling her eyebrows.

As soon as I shot her a look though, she let out a small chuckle and took my car keys from my hand.

"I'll meet you at the car," She said, leaving me with the cashier, and the mental image of a smiling Rose.

Maybe things are slowly going back to normal.

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29/03/20 – The weather is complete ass.