{19} Good Intentions
Rosa nearly ran back to her dormitory, not willing to deal with anyone else at the moment. No one would understand what she was going through at the moment. As a matter of fact even she didn't know what she was going through at the moment. She was completely and utterly confused.
She flung the door open, causing Helena within to jump and then melt into worry.
"What's wrong, Rosa?" asked Helena, immediately receiving her sniffling girlfriend in open arms.
"DA is going to reveal their identity to whomever arrives in the auditorium, and from there the news shall diffuse about Cloisterham," she said, releasing a sigh in an attempt to keep her breathing steady.
"I know, I know," Helena said. "Everyone has seen the announcement. They also said they're going to present their verdict on the mystery. I don't understand why that's such a bad thing."
"I...I don't believe the truths presented there will be the truth," Rosa said. "I feel as if...I..."
"What do you mean?" Helena asked, her brows creasing. "You were obsessed with whatever DA said and did just a day ago. What's changed?"
"I cannot say, there is too much...there is simply too much. But we...we..."
"What should we do?"
"We should go," Rosa said, taking Helena's hand within hers and using her free hand to wipe away her tears. "The auditorium becomes quite congested whenever people go there, and it seems as if most of Cloisterham will be there, waiting to her whatever shall spill from DA's lips."
Helena wanted nothing more than to stop and attempt to decipher what was going through Rosa's mind, but instead she sighed and let herself be yanked along. It didn't take long for the chatter of hundreds of students waiting to hear about DA and who killed Elliot and what was going on right beneath the surface to meet the girls' ears.
"Well, here we are," Rosa said, wrapping her arms around herself. "And so, it seems, is the entirety of the rest of the school. Oh, God. This could very well become a tragedy in a matter of moments, I fear."
"Don't think about it like that. This could be the solution everyone in Cloisterham has been searching for. There's so much everyone has gone through, and this could be the best way to get through it all."
But Rosa didn't seem to calm down at all as she followed the crowd into the auditorium. It was all too clear she was holding something inside. Her eyes flitted around, looking around for and eventually settling upon Jasmine and Neville, who were several layers of people away.
She wanted to reach out to them just to have another way to keep herself upright, but they were too far away. Even if she called out it was unlikely they would hear a word she said. She was stuck standing in this one place.
"No one is sitting down," Rosa noted. "Not a soul."
"I don't think anyone is calm enough to sit down, Rosa," Helena said.
"But..."
"No one is going to stop you from sitting down, if that's what you're trying to say," Helena replied. "You can sit down if you want to."
"No, no...I want to be able to see everything that happens."
"And it appears it's all happening now."
"There's someone moving over there," Helena said, glancing over towards Rosa.
"It's Jasmine," she replied. "I cannot believe it...Jasmine?"
Even as Jasmine took to the stage, the crowd did not hush any of their chatter. Why would they? Jasmine looked as unassuming and quiet as ever. Why would anyone ever have any desire to listen to her?
But she then took the microphone within her hands and spoke out with the clear projection of an actor who knew how to hold the audience within their hands.
"I know that many of you have followed DA around to find out more information concerning the mystery of Elliot Drew. Pretty much the entire school did, and I'm glad. Now I have come here to admit to the fact that I am DA, and I have come to the conclusion of who the murderer was."
With these solid words coming from Jasmine's mouth, everyone immediately hushed. They were going to find out who murdered Elliot Drew, once and for all. Perhaps no one would have anticipated that Jasmine had been the one figure it out, but that was all the more exciting.
"Yes, yes, I know. None of you would've guessed that Jasmine would be the all-powerful DA. Not that anyone really knows I exist to begin with, but...yes. DA. That's me. I know everything there is to know about this whole case with Elliot."
Jasmine rolled her eyes as the audience that had been silence just moments before burst into a new moment of excitement over this revelation. She felt like an impatient teacher, waiting for the students to be quiet. When their chatter finally ceased, she gave a somewhat irritated smile and continued.
"I'm a writer. I write. I know it's what I'm good at. That's why I started DA's blog to write down all of my evidence. And I didn't expect anyone to pay attention to me - but of course, it wasn't me people were paying to. It was my writing as DA. No can resist a good drama."
This time when she paused, Jasmine knew she had the audience within her grasp. Pride welled up within her chest - maybe she called herself a writer, but she thought she was just as good of an actor.
"Why did I do it? Not to be noticed, clearly - I wouldn't have been anonymous if that was the case. No, I really wanted to know who killed Elliot. There's so much to be found now that this has happened, and I needed to get to the bottom from it."
Jasmine could sense that her audience was losing interest. Of course - they couldn't bear to listen to her for much longer than a few moments. Of course. But she decided that she would simply give the people what they wanted. They wanted to know who the killer was.
"So, as DA, I figured it out. The evidence points to Jonathan Jasper, the chorus teacher. He murdered his own nibling out of cold blood. Using the guise of caring uncle, he managed to slip by without many suspecting him - but I didn't let his behavior pass me by."
"Indeed. Mr. Jasper is the killer. If he has anything to say for himself now, then I'll invite hm to do so. He's already signed on to his fate by his actions."
She assumed he would just brush it all aside, but she couldn't prevent a small smile of triumph from curling her lips up when she saw him beginning to approach the stage. Knowing her work was done, she patiently waited for Mr. Jasper to take the microphone himself and then stepped to the side. Her work was done.
"I have to speak for myself," Mr. Jasper said, biting his lip. "I can't let someone else explain all of this themselves. This is...this is my confession to make, now, now that your DA has told you...now that Jasmine has told you."
Those in the audience who had yet to pull out their phones and film the drama now made sure every moment was being recorded. This was far more than anyone had anticipated - here was Elliot's uncle, talking about how he had been accused of killing them.
"I've been accused of killing my nibling, Elliot. I must say that I...I did, I did kill them. It was in a moment of weakness, but I...I'd seen how they acted and I...I loved them, I did, but..."
As shocked as everyone was, everyone was more confused as to what he was babbling on about. He simply did not make sense with all his rambling. But he didn't pay any attention to this. Instead he simply continued to speak.
"And I knew that something had to be done, for Rosa's sake-"
"But what does Rosa have do with any of this?" Neville asked, projecting his voice through the crowd, already starting to advance towards Mr. Jasper. Upon seeing the fury within his eyes, the crowds parted for him. "You mentioned her."
"I thought that much might be obvious," Mr. Jasper said, emitting a chuckle which failed to conceal any of his nerves. "You see, I'm surprised so few of you figured it out."
"What is there to figure out?" Neville replied. "What are you trying to say about Rosa?"
"Rosa...well, she's quite something to talk about. Where do I start?" he said, forcing out a laugh that only served to put everyone edge even more. "I think that she's spoiled beyond belief and she doesn't have any idea how spoiled she is."
A murmur rose up among the audience, partially in confused response to this and partially to see if anyone knew where Rosa was. Several people located her and upon seeing her distress they felt they should look away. Few did. Despite this, Mr. Jasper continued.
"She believes she knows so much of the world and everything within it. She hasn't even experienced twenty years of life yet! She has spent almost her entire life sheltered and kept from the world and everything truly difficult about it."
"That doesn't have anything to do with her now. Why do you care?"
"Well I...I'm in love with her."
A gasp rose up among the members of the audience.
"I...I couldn't help but fall in love with her. Not even despite all of that, probably because of it...I..." Mr. Jasper's confidence faded away as he continued to speak, but he gazed out into the audience to find Rosa standing and staring over at him with eyes the size of saucers. He knew he had to keep going.
Rosa, who had managed to stay upright during his confession, began to faint. She couldn't believe he was saying this in front of so many people. Yes, she knew about his unending lust for her. She knew of the way he claimed it was a love truer than anything else which had existed on the planet. But this was too much.
"It was all for her sake. And to think that Elliot had her right in their grasp," Mr. Jasper continued. "The two dated, always right under my nose, her always just inches out of my reach. Wouldn't it drive you...wouldn't it just make you go crazy to know such a thing was happening?"
"He's raving like a lunatic!" Rosa attempted to cry out, her voice too weak to make much of a sound.
"Especially when I saw the way Elliot looked at her," he said. "They didn't care about her even the tiniest fraction as much as I do! How could I let them continue onwards, probably marrying her later on?"
Rosa felt herself starting to plummet. She wished she wasn't prone to fainting, but she couldn't control what caused it. No one else seemed to notice her plight as they were all too intrigued by what Mr. Jasper had to say. She was going to faint right there and no one could stop it.
"Rosa, are you okay?" Helena murmured.
"Of course I'm not," Rosa replied, a sobbing tone entering her voice. "Of course not."
Rosa longed to release all the thoughts she'd built up within herself. Instead, her thoughts floated about inside her head. Mr. Jasper had killed Elly, but it wasn't him. There was someone else inside him which had done it.
Mr. Jasper was in love with her and telling it to Cloisterham as if everyone needed to know. She was alone in this world in these moments and couldn't even remain standing. Mr. Jasper was going to confess to what Rosa had suspected for ages.
And it was wrong. She knew it was.
"That's why I killed Elliot," he continued. "I know I'm their uncle, almost like a father to them...but I couldn't do such a thing. But it did not work out in such a matter...and now they're dead. I killed them, I'm sure of it."
His words betrayed his inner thoughts - his certainty was to convince himself just as much as it was to convince those who were listening to his confession. And perhaps most of the people in the audience were convinced. But Rosa, sitting there within the audience with the persistent cloud of fainting hanging behind her, was not.
"I don't know what to think of Mr. Jasper," Rosa murmured. "I don't know whether I have any reason to trust him whatsoever. Yet he told me things today which I cannot ignore if I am to be a just judge of his deeds."
"He confessed to killing Elliot, Rosa," Helena replied, shaking her head. "He confessed to a murder. Elliot's murder. And you still think you have to be the moral judge of his actions?"
"I know that it's far more complicated than would please me," Rosa replied. "And I know that I have made fatal errors. Do not mistake this for some sort of compassion blooming from my heart for...no true reason. That is untrue. I loathe Mr. Jasper's endless affection...I loathe it...as much as ever. But this...this is more than that, even if I wish it were not."
"Rosa..." Helena murmured, shaking her head. She longed to comfort Rosa, but wasn't sure just how.
By this point tears were starting to rush down Rosa's cheeks.
"He didn't...he didn't kill Elly. He could not have murdered Elly. I don't know what was going on within his...within his mind...but it has been twisted."
"What? Rosa, what are you talking about?" Helena asked, putting her hands upon Rosa's shoulders. "I don't like what he's saying but it makes sense. You're not going to have to deal with him any longer after this. They're going to take him away because he has killed Elliot."
"No...no, no, no...look at him!" Rosa cried. "That is not the face of a man who killed his nibling out of spite and jealousy."
"Then what is it?" Helena asked.
"I don't know, but I know that he did not murder Elly...he could not have done such a thing. Helena, we have to disrupt this confesssion," Rosa said, through her continuing sobs. "His confession is entirely false, and it must...it must be overturned!"
"Rosa, he's guilty! He's confessed!" Helena responded, trying to be firm but keep her voice soft.
But Rosa's mind had moved past this moment already. She had made her plan and she intended to follow through with it however possible. She broke away from Helena and began to shout out however possible.
"No, no, no!" Rosa cried out, reaching her hands up, desperately trying to draw attention to herself. "No, cease this confession! No, no!"
Through all of the turmoil, Rosa hardly knew how she managed to get up on the stage. She could barely see with her gaze glazed over with a veil of tears. She felt as if she were about to fall into a spell of terror, one not unlike what she felt after she'd kissed Mr. Jasper. But this time there was no one to force away, nothing to escape from except for her own guilt.
"I...I cannot allow Mr. Jasper to continue with his confession," Rosa announced, her reddened face making her look as if she'd gone insane. "He must...he..."
People were beginning to quiet themselves down, but Rosa couldn't manage to speak out without the microphone. Her widened eyes turned towards Mr. Jasper, who was still attempting to speak. However, she did her best to move him out of the way. His words needed to be silenced immediately. He had spoken too many words already.
The two met gazes and, despite his confusion over what she was doing, he moved aside. She started moving onwards but it felt as if her feet were cemented to the ground. She forced herself to move forward. She had to do this.
"Rosa, what are you doing?" Jasmine called out.
"I'm trying to...I'm trying to pursue the truth," Rosa replied, her voice only partially caught by the microphone. Realizing that she was in the scalding spotlight once and for all, she took the microphone within her violently quivering hands to speak.
"And the truth is...Mr. Jasper is not a good man...he is a bad, bad man...he has done vile things...but nothing as vile as murdering his own nibling! The truth is that Mr. Jasper didn't...he didn't murder Elly, he couldn't have!"
"Then who did?"
Rosa's lips parted as if to speak, and as such the audience fell quiet to hear whatever she had to say.
"Oh, god," Rosa said, finding herself in front of a hushed audience. "Oh, god. I don't know how to articulate such words, but I suppose...I suppose that I must!" Her words barely came out through all of her sobs. She was crying so hard that she feared she might very well faint on stage, but she did her best to stay upright.
"I needed to make sure I formed an end to the confession Mr. Jasper has supplied. I...I have been a horrid person. I have done horrid things, and I...I cannot let Mr. Jasper take the blame for them all!"
A chatter grew among the audience of students as they began to process what Rosa was saying. Rosa tried to hush them, but through her tears it was nearly impossible. Instead, she ended up having to continue. She didn't know if anyone would listen to her as she confessed, but she would try.
"Yes, I murdered Elly!" Rosa shrieked out, unable to hold back the words she'd left barricaded in the back of her mind. "I murdered them. I planned it all...I...I had to do it! I could not have determined any other means to achieve what I needed to...what I needed to do."
Rosa still heard the whispers, still heard the gasps, still heard all of the words pushing her further into distress. But she couldn't stop herself now. She'd confessed, and now she had to explain. She had to explain some of what she'd done.
"I killed Elly, yes. And then I was the one...I was the one to convince everyone it was a murder! Who else would have thought that Elly was murdered and not just missing if I had not wailed it all over Cloisterham? No, it was me! It was purely my persuasive words that spread that idea around! And so I tried...I tried to divert the blame...I didn't care who to...but...I can't let...I can't let Mr. Jasper take the blame!"
Every time Rosa paused, she had to make sure she could manage to hold her tears back and avoid letting herself fall apart entirely on stage. No, she needed to explain all that she had begun to confess to. She glanced over to Mr. Jasper, almost as if she were to ask him how she was supposed to manage to continue this. He had just confessed, so he would know how to do it.
But, truly, Rosa was on her own. Rosa just glanced throughout the audience before she began to speak again.
"I murdered Elly because I believed they were...oh, god, I believed that they were Mr. Jasper! The night was unfathomably dark, you must recall..I didn't know..."
When it was clear that few people were actually following what she was saying she realized she had to continue and avoid creating an even greater mess than what she had already formed.
"I shall use...use the most cliche line I can recall. It was a dark and stormy night indeed. Christmas Eve was filled with thunder and a deluge from the heavens. When it peaked you could hardly make out the outline of our hand...so how I was supposed to be able to tell that who was behind me wasn't Mr. Jasper?" Rosa asked.
No one could answer such questions.
"I knew...I knew that Mr. Jasper had given his coat to Elly, I knew...but in that moment I did not recall such a matter. Instead, all I thought of was that he was stalking me as I attempted to get back to my dormitory."
She did not want to look at anyone in the audience, nor did she want to turn to her side and see Mr. Jasper standing there and hearing her confession.
"I've known of his feelings for me and I assumed...I suspected him of so much and I thought he could not do any good. And I had enough experience with him to know there was much amiss...and so I desired to rid myself of him!"
Rosa looked out to the audience before she realized how much damage she had managed to cause with her confession. She had to do something, try to fix something...
"I regret it now, I do!" Rosa cried out. "I do not wish to murder anyone. It was never a conscious thought in my mind until I...until I ended up killing Elly."
She could feel herself shivering violently as she remembered everything that occurred, remembering how she had been forced to keep it within her. Rosa had feigned innocence for far too long, pretended she knew far less than she did. It had been welling up within her for years now. It was not just some effect of Elliot's murder.
"I was driven mad!" Rosa shrieked. "I was driven mad to the point where I could not distinguish good from bad, neither from the other, just as one could not distinguish one shape from another during the storm! And to think in that moment I was glad...I was glad because I thought I was murdering the one who had tormented me for so long!"
The fact that she seemed to be going mad in front of an audience was disturbing to a great many people, from her girlfriend to Jon Jasper to the freshman girl who had looked up to Rosa ever since she came to the school.
"I was terrified," she exclaimed, her chest heaving. "I could not breathe. And I know now...I know this was riddled with errors on my part, I know...I know...you have to understand just how fearful I was. I would not...now I know...I..."
Realizing just how wild she had become, Rosa caught herself and forced herself to take deep breaths, barely controlled. But this seemed to be enough to calm her down in order for her to say one thing more.
"I am sorry. I am so, so sorry."
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: AzTruyen.Top