Kana

People are soaking and refusing to give me an explanation. And I have to pretend to be pissed off at my life partner while still focusing enough to help solve the case.

"So! Let's try and do this like we did it last time! We'll lay out all the evidence and then play a good ol' fashioned game of 'Weird Possibilities, or Just Impossibilities.' Sound like a plan?" I take charge.

"Fine. As much as I hate takin' orders from all ye self-righteous pricks, it DID serve us well last time." Wakumi nods vigorously. It shakes yet another spray of droplets onto me (as though the fall didn't get me wet enough).

"What do you mean, 'self-righteous pricks?!" I yell automatically.

"You would forgive us for having hang-ups about the whole situation, especially given that nobody gave us any warning!" Azumi snipes back.

"I-I just wanted to help!" Chimon whimpers.

"Are we still fucking arguing about this?! There are more important things!" Yuu yells.

"Yeah! C'mon, guys, we're never going to figure this out if we don't cooperate!" Haruto agrees, squirming uncomfortably. He never has liked conflict, it seems.

"As much as I love this soap opera drama, it's bound to get boring eventually! And time runs out when I get bored!" Monokuma concurs in a sing-song voice.

"Everyone, let's just kiss and make up," Ren smirks, clearly trying to look seductive.

"Let's call a ceasefire, at least temporarily. If we wanna still be pissy afterwards, then fuck it, but now's not the time," Gou leads.

"Yes, please! I'm really tired of all the fighting... So let's get started with the evidence sharing," Fujiko nudges.

Chimon speaks up first. "Aside from the state of the body, which you all know about from the Monokuma File, Monterio and I found that her boots had been tossed aside, and her staff is weird; the top part is gone, and there was a cap covering a sharpened tip. Wakumi reports that it hadn't been there before."

"Oh! We found the top!" Ren interjects. "It was on her desk, completely broken! We also found a notebook open to a torn out page, with nothing in it. In the hallway, we found a note with the word 'Gotcha,' and it wasn't Joanie's handwriting. And right outside her door was a scuff mark from a shoe."

"And that mark indicated that someone took a sharp turn out towards the stairs," Yuu chimes in.

"Kana and I noticed weird things in the beautician's. Somebody moved the nail polish remover last night, and I dunno why. Also, there was a random tube of super glue in the lipgloss section, and the hairdressing capes were super wet!" Fujiko exclaims

"As wet as these two," I tease. Wakumi shoves me, and Monterio gives me a glare that, to anyone but me, would look very bitter. I cackle mischievously.

"Hmm... super glue? I see." Azumi purses her lips briefly.

"There was a bucket with traces of soapy water in the Warehouse! Maybe someone cleaned the capes? Also, there was a dried-out marker without a cap on it. Not sure if it's important, but we'll see!" Gou announces.

"Lastly, we took notice of some peculiar circumstances in the craft room. Two of the stands had hooks drilled into them— and the one closer to the entrance had blood on it, but the vase on top did not. Also, in a pot that nobody Haruto's size or larger can fit inside, a drill was tucked away," Azumi summarizes.

"Umm... Wild Idea number one..." Haruto starts, "the hooks were drilled into the stands so that they could be dragged somewhere, and probably used as the murder weapon."

"Impossible," Monterio quickly contradicts. "The bludgeon wound looked more rounded. If the stand had been used, the indentation would've looked significantly different."

"Not only that, but it definitely couldn't have been dragged up the stairs without showing signs of wear and tear. Plus, that would take a significant amount of physical strength," Tozen concludes.

"It still could have potentially been dragged somewhere on the first floor, though, so let us keep that in mind," Azumi states.

"How about Wild Idea number two? Somehow, somebody got into Joanie's room to kill her and tamper with the evidence. They then realized they forgot something, and sprinted out to grab it," Gou tries.

"Impossible. Her room showed no signs of blood whatsoever," Yuu points out. "That would be really hard to pull off if they ambushed her, especially since the floor is carpet."

"Also, I would like to reassure you about one thing! There was no way provided to get into your fellow participants' rooms uninvited this trial!" Monokuma laughs.

"That is a relief," Azumi sighs.

"Weird. Why would the staff topper be on her desk, then?" Tozen ponders to himself.

"Wild idea number three," Wakumi growls. "The hairdresser capes were used for the killer ta carry Ginny n' dump 'er in the pool without gettin' blood all o'er themselves."

We think to ourselves for a moment. "That sounds pretty logical to me!" Fujiko nods.

"Maybe, if we add onto it, they used the soapy water to clean up the capes afterwards! That explains why they were wet!" Haruto cheers.

"I was wondering, though... how would they have stayed wet for ten hours?" Ren asks.

"They were folded," I explain, "so the surfaces weren't fully exposed to open air. The killer probably folded them so they wouldn't look out of place, not realizing that they'd stay wet."

"So, since we have established that the stand had to stay downstairs AND that Joanie was carried up to the third floor, I believe it is probably safe to assume that the crime was carried out on the first floor, somewhere between Joanie's room and the stairs," Azumi snaps dramatically, wearing a proud smile. She's contorting herself again, as though she physically can't think without making herself into a human pretzel.

Fujiko clacks her nails on the table. "Um, yeah, I totally, totally feel you, and I'm pretty sure I agree with that, but I did have one itsy-bitsy hang up."

"Which is?"

"We still dunno about all the evidence in her bedroom."

"I did have a bit of a suspicion," Monterio mumbles.

"Which would be...?" I beckon.

"Monokuma said nobody could come in uninvited... knowing him, someone may have come in with Joanie's knowledge."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Monterio

"Actually, that'd probably explain a lot! It would explain how the topper was crushed, though maybe not why. It would also possibly explain the note. If Joanie had invited somebody to her room, they could've sent a note back: 'Gotcha.' Right?" Gou elaborates.

"I need to tell you guys something about that staff head," Tozen pipes up.

"Oh! Is this about that secret we were debating last trial? The one that got Joanie suspecting us?" Azumi asks. I must admit, my curiosity is piqued. I hadn't really gotten that out of my mind since then.

"It is. The top part of Joanie's staff was a camera. Sayuri must've learned about it thanks to being the winner of the code game, because, during the speaker fiasco, she wiped the footage. The only problem is, I don't remember telling anyone that, but Joanie might've. I'm not entirely sure who knows."

"So why would Joanie invite someone to her room in secret, and what happened that led to all of this?"

"Can I chime in with something kind of crazy?" my girlfriend asks, nerves dancing along her face. I take a brief opportunity to squish her hand underneath the table to support her, but I keep my facial expression somewhat harsh and release her hand quickly.

"By all means," Yuu invites. Fujiko, to the right of him, nods, but now the chair on his left side is vacant. Her X is made out of two pictures of her staff, joining Sayuri's quill pen X.

"If I'm wrong, please, shoot me down immediately, but... is it possible that Joanie invited someone to her room to kill them?" She winces in anticipation.

"YE DON'T GET TA SAY SHIT LIKE THAT, Y'HEAR?! I'LL CLEVE YE TA THE BRISKET N' TOSS YE OVERBOARD!" Wakumi bellows. She grabs a fistful of Kana's hair, and I immediately reach over to snag her hand. Do whatever you want to me. Leave her out of it. She glares at me and then releases Kana's hair. I let her go, and she detracts. "That lassie was too much o' a goody-goody."

"If that wasn't what she was trying to do, then why would she have sharpened her staff into a makeshift spear? I don't like thinking that was her plan, either, but that looks... kinda bad," Ren grimaces.

"Fer self-defense, ye loons! She was tryin' real hard ta please ye bilge-suckers, and ye of all people should know that! Ye were all so friggin paranoid that she musta started thinkin' ye would strike first!"

"The fact that she WAS trying really hard to accommodate our fears is what makes me think it wasn't self-defense. She would always offer to leave her staff by the door... Plus, the staff must've been ready for a good while. I'm pretty sure the cap she used to hide it was the marker cap, and the marker had time to dry out."

"Then maybe she just invited someone o'er fer a pleasant chat, n' they took the opportunity ta backstab 'er n' break the staff!!"

"What if SHE was the one to break her own staff? To get rid of evidence?"

"Maybe she invited Tozen! 'E knew bout the staff, 'e was on the opposite side o' the schism, and 'e coulda had access ta all kinds o' weaponry without anyone suspectin' 'im!"

"Can I see the 'Gotcha' note?" Bisque asks. Yuu passes it to him. "No, it's definitely not him!" he declares confidently. "He writes the menu everyday! That's absolutely not his handwriting!"

"Does anyone have paper? We could all compare handwriting," I offer.

"HEY! I ain't satisfied yet!" Wakumi cuts in.

Yuu fiddles with his tie. "Look, the scuff mark would make sense if she intended to kill someone, too. Can I demonstrate, Monokuma?"

"Ah, another stretch break! Of course, of course!"

"C'mere, Fujiko."

"I gotchu, boo!"

"Everyone watch my feet. Pretend you have a spear, Fujiko."

"Mhm!" She giggles as she starts stabbing the air.

"Stop."

"Okay, okay!"

"Now lunge at me. QUICKLY," he instructs strictly.

She does so, and he nimbly twists out of the way, tilting his left foot and then sprinting a few paces. Sure enough, a similar black streak is left on the floor.

"...Fine," Wakumi murmurs grumpily. But I almost detect the slightest trace of sadness under her frustration.

"Let's compare handwriting now," I insist.

One Monoinu clears his throat. "I can assist. I have a printer function, so I can retrieve a blank sheet of paper for you!" Like clockwork, he ejects a page. Starting with Yuu and then going clockwise, we all write "Gotcha," followed by our name.

"You have a lovely signature, Azumi. It's a shame that 'u' and 'i' aren't next to each other in the alphabet," Ren teases.

"No, but 'h' and 'i' are, so allow me to offer you this humble greeting!" she smiles.

"Weird! None of them match the note!" Fujiko exclaims as she looks over Yuu's shoulders.

"Someone probably fudged it! And I don't think we've seen everyone's handwriting. Fuck, we'll have to figure out who she called another way!" my life partner yells.

"We will. But I'm really confused. If we're going with this theory that Joanie set up a rendezvous with somebody in order to kill them, how did it wind up with her on the receiving end of blunt force trauma, of all things?" my little buddy asks.

"Maybe... whoever got the invitation somehow caught wind of the plan to shank them," Gou theorizes.

Tozen snaps his suspenders to get our attention. "Well, there are a couple of people we can rule out definitively."

"Those being?" I goad.

"Azumi, for one. She's always barefoot, and I doubt it's possible to make scuff marks without shoes. Secondly, whoever was the third person to see the body. The other two can be manipulated, like with Nari, but the third person will always trigger the announcement."

"That would be me," Fujiko points out. I'm glad for it; it sucks that she had to be among the first to see the body, but at least we know she's safe. We're not losing her today.

"Makes sense. I can't imagine Joanie would ever wanna hurt you," Bisque sympathizes.

"Alrighty, everyone. Let's see if we can figure out how this whole situation went down," Gou leads.

"Victory for Joanie," Kana declares.

Ever so quietly next to her, I hear Wakumi whisper, "Victory fer Ginny."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tozen

Have you ever had this awareness that you're forgetting something? Even if you don't know what you've forgotten— you just know you ARE? Cause I'm getting the distinct sense that something is very wrong, but I can't place it for the life of me.

Either way, there's not much time to dwell on it. Cause it's time to figure out what happened to Joanie.

"There are way too many things involved for me to think this was done on the fly! There was probably some kind of trap set up, right?" Bisque starts.

"Yeah, that makes the most sense. And it somehow involves the bloody stand, but that's not the murder weapon," Chimon points out.

"If Joanie's goal really HAD been to kill, then she couldn't simply let the intended victim get away. They would've told us about her treachery come the morning. Because of that, the Blackened could have lured her pretty much anywhere." Yuu walks his fingers along the table like he's re-enacting a chase.

"Perhaps the hooks were used to hang the stands from the ceiling, and the killer sliced the ropes to send them falling on her? To pin her down, possibly?" Azumi offers.

"I don't think there's any place to hang them FROM. But I think you're on the right track with keeping her in place," I mention.

Ren tries next. "If they weren't hung up, maybe they were used as like a tripwire sort of ordeal! Y'know, instead of falling in love, she was just kinda forced to fall. Well, I guess that means she fell for someone... but it's more like falling for their trap..." His eyes go wide at the thought, and he nibbles his lip.

"That could be why there were two of them! Whatever they used as the wire would've been connected between them," Kana points out.

"If that's the case, then it's likely that the murder occurred in the entrance to the craft room. Joanie would've seen the trap coming a mile away if she was just chasing the Blackened through the hallway, even though it was dark," Monterio infers, not making eye contact with anyone.

"Aye, Ginny was tough enough that she'd get straight up if she fell, even if one o' said stands landed dead on 'er."

"So there was something else keeping her rooted to one spot after she fell. Hmmm. Could the Blackened's body weight be enough?" Gou asks.

"Depends on who we're suspectin', but prolly not," she huffs.

"Maybe the Blackened used something to injure her feet along the way," Yuu thinks.

"She could've stayed down voluntarily. I don't know why she WOULD, but it's an option," I share.

"Uh... Oooh! What about the super glue?" Fujiko suggests.

"Fujiko, I think you have hit upon an intriguing idea! The killer could have constructed something akin to those glue traps used in pest control to keep Joanie stuck. If the killer ran directly into the craft room, leapt over the string for the tripwire, and angled themselves away from the middle, they could lure Joanie straight into a puddle of super glue!" Azumi visualizes.

"And if one of the stands fell on top of her, that's even more secure!" Gou adds.

"But there weren't any sticky spots on the floor in there! And the floor is wood, so we should've instantly been able to see if it had soaked up any moisture. Cause the ways I know of to clean off super glue all include liquids. I think we're missing something important!" Bisque claims.

We mull it over for quite a long time. And then Kana gives a snap of celebration. "The hairdresser capes! They weren't JUST used for carrying Joanie! What if they were wet not only because the killer needed to clean blood, but also because they needed to clean adhesive?"

"That would work! Warm, soapy water is one of the ways to clean super glue, if I remember correctly," Chimon confirms. "But there is something on my mind. We haven't come up with the murder weapon!"

"Could they have disarmed 'er and whacked 'er with the spear? Would make sense why 'er fingers were all mangled ta hell n' back."

"Maybe they disarmed her, but they definitely didn't use it to kill her. The wound would've been long, thin, and like a tube," Monterio contrasts.

"Is there any chance the bucket could've been used?"

"Same problem. That's definitely not what the wound looked like."

"The only thing I can think of," I ponder, "was the drill we found stored in the giant vase. There was no blood on it, but it's possible that they hit her with the back of it."

"Ooh! Like pistol whipping in the movies," Bisque describes. He pantomimes holding something and brings it down hard, slamming his fist on the table. And the instant regret is palpable as he grimaces. "Ow. Bad plan."

"...Hmm... yeah! That would make a rounded imprint!" Chimon nods.

"Um, I was kind of wondering, though," Bisque interjects once again, "where does the nail polish remover come into play? The only way I could think to use it would be to clean the super glue, but didn't we already determine that the soapy water did that?"

"True. And why did they put the glue in the beautician's, instead of back into the Warehouse, or wherever it was originally?" Fujiko pouts.

"What if it was a mistake while they were cleaning? What if they went to clean it with the nail polish remover, but thought of a fundamental flaw right in the middle of their plan?" Gou thinks.

"I know what that flaw could be," Kana stands confidently, hand on her hip. "Smell. Remember, I get hella nauseous with overpowering smells, so I can tell you for sure that nail polish remover is a lot. It's acetone, after all, the same kind of stuff used in most paint thinners. It would've been obvious a mile away if it had been used, so maybe the killer had to clean twice— once to get rid of the glue, and once to get rid of the smell?"

"There is so much about this case that seems to go against basic logic. Disarming and injuring Joanie's hand only to not use the staff? Putting things in places they should not have gone? Realizing a major problem midway through? It's as though they lost all common sense!" Azumi frets.

"Ohhhhhh," Chimon says, seemingly having a lightbulb moment. And then his expression falls from one of satisfaction to one of horrid realization. "Oh."

I get a feeling like I'm about to be sick to my stomach.